Kakuzu’s scream echoed throughout the halls of the Akatsuki. All of the members raced to where they heard the scream and found Kakuzu on the ground lying on his side in the fetal position.
    
“What happened? Did one of the tailed beasts escape their seal?” Pein asked.
    
“Is our headquarters under attack kwa enemy shinobi?” Konan asked.
    
“Did someone have donuts and wouldn’t share them?” Tobi asked.

The other members glared at Tobi for his swali and Deidara dragged Tobi away kwa his ear. “No,” Kakuzu replied, “It is worse than all of those things. It is the most horrible evil imaginable.”
    
“Quit being an overdramatic little bitch, kahaba and just tell us what the f*** happened,” Hidan shouted.
    
The wind mask emerged slightly from Kakuzu’s back and blasted Hidan back a great distance. Kakuzu then turned to the others and shouted, “We are out of money!”
    
Pein, looking slightly annoyed, replied, “We will just do what we have always done Kakuzu. Rob banks au collect bounties.”
    
“That is not really doable. We have robbed so many banks that they have all either gone out of business au moved to secret locations. On juu of that all the good bounties know not to travel through this region now,” Kakuzu explained.
    
Pein rubbed his forehead. Konan sighed and said, “Looks like we have to earn our money the old fashioned way and get real jobs.”
    
Kisame thought for a moment and said, “I hadn’t had a regular job since I worked as a lifeguard at the beach. I was fired because I couldn’t save anybody. beach, pwani goers thought I was a real papa when I swam out to them and panicked.”
    
“I think what Kisame is trying to say is the members of Akatsuki aren’t really built for normal jobs,” Itachi explained.
    
“Well we have got to try. We have no other options,” Pein explained.
    
Hidan finally came back to the group. “Why the f*** did wewe hit me with the wind style attack Kakuzu?” He asked.
    
Kakuzu snickered. “You had a bee buzzing around wewe and I was attempting to kill it,” Kakuzu said.
    
Hidan grabbed his scythe. “Bulls***! wewe hit me on purpose.”
    
“Enough,” Pein said, “You are all instructed to find part time jobs immediately to make up for our financial losses.” The Akatsuki members nodded simultaneously and went in various directions to attempt to make money.
    
A few hours later, Pein and Konan decided to see how the members were doing. They happened across Zetsu, who was working a barbecue while several people were sitting around at picnic tables eating. Pein walked over and saw a pile of money from customers in a pail inayofuata to Zetsu’s grill.
    
“I see wewe have done very well Zetsu,” Pein commented.
    
“Thank you. My special recipe has always been very tasty,” Zetsu explained.
    
A customer walked up to Zetsu. “These are awesome mister. What do wewe put in these sloppy joes anyway?”” He asked.
    
“A guy named Joe,” Zetsu replied.
    
Pein and Konan’s eyes went wide, but the customer merely laughed. “Seriously though. What is in it?” He asked.
    
Zetsu lifted up Joe’s head to onyesha the man. Suddenly the crowd began to scream and run in various directions out of terror, one of whom grabbed the pail full of money.
    
Elsewhere, Deidara was making various clay bombs as Tobi constructed stands for people to sit in. “You’re so smart Deidara sempai. Using your clay bombs as a fireworks onyesha for people to watch,” Tobi said.
    
“Thank wewe Tobi. A true artist always finds a way to make people appreciate his craft un,” Deidara said, “When you’re done be sure to stand guard un. We don’t want any freeloaders secretly watching the onyesha without paying un.”
    
Tobi gave Deidara two thumbs up. “You got it sempai. Tobi is a good guard,” Tobi said.
    
People gathered in the stands, placing money in the ticket booth. Deidara began grabbing the bombs he made from the meza, jedwali and began to set them off in various elaborate ways to impress the crowd. Meanwhile Tobi was searching the area when he came across a squirrel.
    
“Mister Squirrel. wewe can’t watch the onyesha without paying,” Tobi alisema as he held out his hand for money.

The squirrel turned its head slightly and bit Tobi’s finger.

Tobi grabbed his finger and said, “Ouchie! Mister squirrel is not a good boy.” Tobi chased the squirrel around until he ran into the meza, jedwali with Deidara’s clay bombs on them. The bombs were flung in various directions hitting the stands and obliterating the people, as well as the ticket booth where the money was stored.

Deidara shouted, “Tobi!”

Tobi now ran from Deidara as the squirrel watched, thoroughly amused.
    
Meanwhile, Itachi was sitting in a mashua full of samaki as Kisame was swimming through the water and throwing them into the boat. “This was a great idea Itachi,” Kisame explained as he jumped back into the boat.
    
“With my Sharingan to scope out where they were in the water and your incredible swimming abilities, catching all of these samaki was child’s play,” Itachi said.
    
Kisame began to row the mashua away when something suddenly bumped into. A blue-skinned man looking similar to Kisame emerged from the water. “Hey watch where you’re going!” He shouted.
    
Kisame looked at him and asked, “Uncle?”
    
The man in the water looked up at him. “Kisame,” He said, “It is great to see wewe kid. wewe should have called and let me know wewe were in town.”
    
“I was going too,” Kisame said, “I just forgot.”
    
“Yeah right,” Kisame’s uncle said, “You never liked me.” He looked over at Itachi. “He never liked me since he was a kid,” the uncle explained, “I’d play peek-a-boo with him and he’d always wet himself.”
    
Itachi smirked and Kisame whined, “Uncle. Don’t embarrass me in front of my teammate.”
    
Suddenly a blue-skinned girl appeared on the side of the ship and hopped on board inayofuata to Itachi. “Come on Cousin Kisame. We were just having fun with you,” She said. She looked over at Itachi and winked at him. “More importantly. Who is your cute friend Kisame?”

“My name is Itachi,” Itachi replied.
    
Kisame’s cousin scooted closer. “Oooh. Aren’t wewe a studly man?” She cooed.
    
Kisame’s uncle leaped into the mashua between Itachi and Kisame’s cousin. “Don’t wewe be eyeballing my daughter pretty boy,” The uncle alisema to Itachi.

“I wasn’t,” Itachi replied.

Kisame’s uncle got madder. “You saying she isn’t good enough for you?” He asked.

Before Itachi could respond, Kisame intervened and said, “Look. We really have to be going. The samaki are going to spoil.”    

“Nonsense,” his uncle replied, “You can come to chajio, chakula cha jioni with your friend. Your aunt makes a great sushi casserole.” Before Itachi and Kisame could stop them, Kisame’s uncle and cousin grabbed the samaki and swam back to their place.

Itachi sighed. “I thought I was done with this kind of stuff when I wiped out my clan,” Itachi explained.

The Akatsuki gathered back at the base, seemingly defeated in all their money-making attempts. Suddenly, Kakuzu and Hidan came through the door with a big wheelbarrow full of money.

Pein, looking fairly stunned, replied, “How did wewe guys get all this money?”

Hidan simply cursed under his breath. Kakuzu smirked and explained, “Hidan was standing on mitaani, mtaa corners preaching about Jashinism hoping to get converts and donations to his religion.”

Konan then stated, “I’m guessing he got a lot of converts with all these donations.”
    
Hidan walked away mumbling, “Lousy f***ing heathens!”
    
“Actually the crowds were paying him to shut up,” Kakuzu laughed, “It made so much money we went all over town.”
    
The entire Akatsuki burst into laughter as Hidan cursed them out.