Its not mine i didn't create i found it all the credits go to link


1.Ask Alan Rickman to autograph a body part.

2. Follow him around town like a crazed fan. Finally ask him, "Are wewe really Alan Rickman?" When he says yes, say, "Oh, I thought wewe were someone else," and walk away.

3. Tell him how sexy his pinky finger is.

4. Pinch his butt. Then act like he pinched you.

5. Run after him screaming, "Daddy!"

6. Walk up to him with a huge chemistry textbook and say, "Professor Snape? Can wewe please help me with my Potions homework?"

7. Instead of asking him to autograph a picture au DVD, ask him to autograph a sanitary napkin. (Hee hee hee...)

8. Ask him, "Can I smell your underwear?" (If any one of wewe actually does this, please let me know the full details of the ensuing conversation!)

9. While Alan is in his limo, pretend your a windshield cleaner. When the limo hits a red light, squeegee the windows and refuse to leave.

10. During a (preferably serious) play, hold up a sign that says, "Give Us A Real Show, Alan! Strip For Us!"

11. Give him flowers. Dead flowers.

12. Stare at his balls and tell him how gorgeous his eyes are.

13. Throw marshmallows onto the stage.

14. Look at him for a very long time, then say, "No offense sir, but wewe look like that one really ugly actor from Die Hard. What's his name? Oh yeah, Alan Rickman."

15. Ask him where babies come from. Have a notebook in hand to take notes!

16. Point at him and laugh uncontrollably.

17. Walk up to him, stare at him, and say spookily, "I just saw a vision of my own death..."

18. Get a friend. wewe pull one of Alan's arms while your friend pulls the other, and start imba "The Boy Is Mine."

19. Make a beautifully packaged gift basket and present it to him after a play. Inside, include condoms, can openers, floppy discs, used tissues, and other bila mpangilio junk, taka wewe can find.

20. Kneel at his feet, start bowing and chanting, "We're not worthy! We're not worthy!" Then stop, give a good look at him, and say, "Oh, I thought wewe were someone else."

21. Stand inayofuata to Alan. When someone else goes up to him for an autograph, say in a nonchalant voice, "He's my daddy, wewe know."

22. Dress like a nun, and pinch his butt!

23. Instead of throwing flowers onstage, throw little boxes of Rogaine.

24. After the play, go up to Alan and say, "Did wewe see that guy up there, that Alan guy? He was so pathetic and he can't act at all!"

25. Ask him where he keeps his toilet paper.

26. Walk up to him. Poke him on the nose like how Alanis Morrisette pokes Bethany on the nose in Dogma.

27. Pretend to be pregnant. Go up to him and scream, while pointing to your stomach, "How could you?" (This works best when lots of people are around!)

28. Scream profanities at him. (Um...)

29. Gather together a huge book of NC-17 Snape fanfics from online, with all possible pairings. Send it to him.

30. Ask him, "How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop?"

31. Walk up to him and ask him, "Where is the bathroom?"

32. Smear your hands in Krazy Glue. Then shake hands with Alan! That'll keep wewe two together for a while.

33. Get cosmetic surgery to look like Rima!

34. Tell him that he is like an M&M. He melts in your mouth, and not in your hand.

35. Ask him, "Does my pants make my butt look big?"

36. Bring a huge poster of Ian McKellen to the play and ask him to sign it.

37. If wewe see him walking down the street, go up to him and whisper in his ear, "I'm going to kill wewe and send wewe down the garbage disposal." Then when he looks at you, gasp and say, "I'm so sorry sir! For a moment I thought wewe were that actor, Alan Rickman!"

38. Go up to him really close and shove ice cubes down his pants!

39. During the middle of the play when Alan is onstage, scream, "Where's Alan Rickman! And who is this ugly fraud!"

40. Ask him for a kiss. Then stick your tongue in his mouth. (Yummy.)

41. Ask him for a picture. Then use one of those camera squirt toys and squirt water in his face.

42. While he's outside of the theater signing autographs, stick a note on his back that says, "I eat wanyama and small children," au other similarly witty catchphrase.

43. Wait a long time to get his autograph... then go up to him and ask him if he's got change for a nickel.

44. Blow your nose on his shirt.

45. Wet your hands at the sink. Then pretend to sneeze in his face, shaking the water from your hands onto his face. (It feels like someone really sneezed at you! Totally gross.)

46. Buy him a mini skirt.

47. Kick him in the nuts. Offer to kiss them to make them feel better.

48. Gush on and on about how much wewe absolutely loved him in Lord Of The Rings, nyota Wars, and other sinema he wasn't a part of.

49. Crash your car with his and then you'll have to exchange addresses for insurance reasons.

50. During a play, laugh loudly at bila mpangilio places.

51. Make funny faces at him during a play.

52. Eat lots of garlic and tomatoes (like in Closet Land) and kiss him.

53. Dress like a man, and accuse him of stealing Rima.

54. Look at him really closely, then turn to your friend and say, "I told wewe his hair isn't real. wewe owe me ten bucks."

55. Accuse him of kidnapping your mommy, then start crying.

56. Say to Alan, "Hello, Rima! Where can I meet Alan Rickman?"

57. Touch him in inappropriate places, and then say, "How did my hand get there?"

58. Ask him to sign everything in sight. ("Alan, can wewe please sign this mti leaf?")

59. Tell him, "Alan, you're the most handsome man in the world! au no... maybe Orlando Bloom is. Maybe Ian McKellen is. Actually, I think Johnny Depp is. Sorry about that."

60. Dress up like an agent from the X Files and run up to him and give him a mysterious package in a manila envelope while saying, "Hold onto this while I alert the Undercover Resistance."

61. Run up to him screaming, "The aliens! They're everywhere! Oh no! Not wewe too!" Run off.

62. Say to him, "Do wewe know who the best actor in the world is?" Look at him like you're going to say his name, but then say, "Kevin Spacey."

63. Suck your thumb while wewe sit in the front row of the play.

64. Instead of asking for an autograph, ask for a lock of his... erm, pubic hair. (I didn't suggest this! Someone else did!)

65. Grab him and scream, "You're in deep trouble, young man! Go to your room right now!"

66. Spray silly string at him.

67. When asking him for an autograph, whisper huskily, "Thank wewe for that great time last night. wewe know what I'm talking about, Big Boy."

68. Dress up like a cop, and walk up to him with handcuffs, saying, "Hans Gruber, I'm putting wewe under arrest for murder and arson."

69. Run up to him, kissing and hugging him, and saying, "Honey! Where were you! I missed wewe so much! I'm so glad you're coming home!" Then back away and say, "Wait a minute. Who are you! Get your hands off of me!" Run.

70. Make a sign that says "The End Is Near." Hold it up at plays. Preferably in the front row.

71. Print out huge, glossy, laminated pictures of the diving scene in Dark Harbor and ask him to sign them for you. (You know what I'm talking about. The scene where he's completely naked?)

72. Print out huge, glossy, laminated pictures of the diving scene in Dark Harbor and wear them on your shirt.

73. Print out this orodha and give it to him. (And mention link if you're cool!)

74. Get a restraining order on him before he gets one on you.

75. Drag him with wewe into a gas station and attempt to tango with him.

76. Look down into his pants. When he asks wewe what you're doing, innocently say you're only checking to see if he told the truth in Rasputin and if he really is a "great big man."

77. Look down into his pants. When he asks wewe what you're doing, innocently say, "What have wewe got to hide? I thought wewe were as anatomically impaired as a Ken doll."

78. At the stage door, give him fifty au sixty helium filled balloons, preferably in the form of pink elephants.

79. Serenade him with "Take It With Me" kwa Tom Waits, which is his inayopendelewa romantic song.

80. Serenade him with "Hot In Here" kwa Nelly.

81. Do the handshake my friend Kristy invented. First, take Alan's hand, palm up, and tell him to relax his hand. Then quickly push his hand down and make him grab his own crotch. (Try this on your Marafiki for practice. It's hilarious!)

82. Spill hot, burning acid all over his clothes. Then he'll have to strip.

83. Go up to him and give him a fork and say, "At least it wasn't a spoon."

84. When wewe see Alan amd Rima go to them and say, "Alan, baby, what do wewe think I should wear tonight? The blue G-string au the pink G-string?"

85. Go to the Harry Potter movie sets and sing as loud as wewe can:
Sweet nyumbani Hogwarts
Where the skies are so blue
Sweet nyumbani Alabama
Severus, I'm coming nyumbani to you

86. Tell him, "Do wewe turn me on, do I turn wewe on?" When his mouth falls open because he can't say anything, scream, "Listen everybody, I turn him on!"

87. Go to one of his sinema sets and every time when he makes a mistake scream, "Alan, you've been a bad boy, go to my room!"

88. Dress as Lady Marian and walk up to him and shout, "I will never marry you!" Then cry and run off.

89. Ask him for a little interview, and when he agrees, wewe start the camera, raise your microphone and say, "Hello, I stand here beside the great Hugh Grant..."

90. Tell him, "Hey? Aren't wewe the cutie from upendo Actually?" Start asking maswali for about half an saa and then say, "No... wewe aren't..."

91. Douse yourself in kerosene and hold two road flares and threaten to hug him.

92. Ask Alan where babies come from, and then when (if) he starts to explain, look puzzled and ask him to demonstrate.

93. During the reception at a major social event (where Alan Rickman will use spoons), start screaming, "He's got a weapon!"

94. Go up to him when there are some people around, and say in a kind voice, "Honey, you're almost done here, aren't you? wewe did promise you'd spend some time with AJ (little Alan Junior)!"

95. As wewe talk to him, look at him pointedly down there, and say suggestively, echoing the words of Harry Potter: "And if wewe don't mind, I'd appreciate it if wewe lower your wand."

96. Ask him, "So, Alan, when wewe wear pants, do wewe wear it left au right?"

97. Say, "Wingardium Leviosa," while flourishing your wand near his... area.

98. Hand him a diagram including a picture of a naked Ken doll and a picture from the Dark Harbor diving scene. Say, "I've been studying these and somehow Ken seems zaidi impaired than you..."


99. Ask him innocently if wewe can ride his broomstick.

100. Beat him up.

101. Go up to him and make motorcycle noises, increasing the volume if he tries to talk.


102. Run around him (preferably in a well-populated public) and sing Offspring's song: "And all the girls say he's pretty fly! For a white guy!" Have flashily dressed backup dancers sing: "Uno, dos, tres, cuatro, cinco-cinco, seis!" That'll get his attention.

103. During our man's inayofuata birthday, shout: "Happy eightieth, Alan!"

104. During our man's inayofuata birthday, bake him a small cake with all fifty-plus candles cramed onto its surface. Flourishingly light all the candles with a blowtorch and present it to him. (Make sure to have a moto extinguisher handy.)

105. Run up to Alan and ask him for a private potions lesson.


106. Write a poem about him and read it to him out loud. Webmistress Helen suggests kusoma the classic poems of the sekunde Earl of Rochester, and the classic prose of the Marquis de Sade for inspiration.

107: Go to him, scream his name and say, "Hey, that's Alan Rickman! Could wewe give me the number of Liam Neeson?"

108: Ask Alan if wewe can have one of his pillows off his bed.


109: Ask Alan if wewe can see his wand.


110: Run up to Alan, onyesha him a picture of himself, and say frantically, "My husband's gone missing! Can wewe help me?"

111: Take out a gun and shoot him.

112: Approach Alan and ask him to sign your spoon. When he asks: "Why a spoon?" reply in an impression of him from Robin Hood: "Because it's dull wewe twit, it will hurt more!"

113: Walk up to him, and stare at him for an extended period of time. Wait until he asks wewe what's wrong. Then tell him he did a terrible job cutting his hair.

114: Walk up to him and say: "You're my best friend, Bobby!" and hug him tight.


115: Give him a pair of scissors and ask him if he wants to cut your hair.