Bellatrix Lestrange Club
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posted by Lord-Voldemort
As wewe well know, our goal was to murder Harry Potter and dispose of the Order of the Pheonix. With the approach of the final 2 movies, I fear that the majority of HP mashabiki will believe us defeated and vanquished, HOWEVER, this movie is a fake. Rowling did not write a story, she wrote a history of Wizarding War and marketed it as a work of fiction. Rowling is a very clever woman and therefore she altered the end so that the "good guys" won the war, when in reality, I won the war. Harry Potter is dead. Please read the Alternate Ending ilitumwa kwa Dawnstalker to find out the truth about the end of the war. I now truly rule the wizarding world, Yaxley is Headmaster of Hogwarts, Karkaroff was killed for mutiny and most of my truly loyal Deatheaters are very much alive and having a wonderful time keeping mudbloods in their places. For the good of those who don't know the current status of my Deatheaters, I will tell you:
Avery-dead
Regulus Black-dead, the traitor
Amycus-Alive, teaches at Hogwarts
Alecto-dead, killed kwa the Weasley woman
Crabbe Sr-alive, somewhere in Russia
Barty Crouch Jr-very much alive, torturing mudbloods
Dolohov-alive but retired, his loyalty is remembered
Gibbon-killed kwa Rowle, 'twas an accident
Goyle Sr-alive, teaches at Hogwarts
Greyback-alive, killing muggles left and right
Jugson-dead, killed kwa a muggle, the weakling
Karkaroff-dead, I killed him personally
Rodolphus-alive, he's discovered the internet as well
Rabastan-alive, he's hunting for Potter supporters
Macnair-alive, leads the Dark Police force
Draco-alive, he is very loyal now
Lucius-alive, but not very active
Mulciber-alive, teaches Unforgivable curses at Hogwarts
Nott Sr-alive, and remarried
Peter Pettigrew-dead, kwa his own hand (haha)
Rookwood-alive, working with Rabastan
Rosier-dead,
Rowle-dead
Selwyn-alive, working on some secret things
Snape-dead, good riddance >:(
Travers-alive, teaching at Hogwarts
Wilkes-dead for ages
Yaxley-alive, in charge of the jails

And Bellatrix, as wewe all know, is very much alive, and very happily crucioing people who deserve it.

As for the people who think that we should crucio everyone no matter what, it's not particularly smart to do that, if I crucioed all my DeathEaters, the only one left would be Bella! There are different punishments for those that fail me though, the Cruciatus Curse is only for emergencies, mudbloods and muggles.

Speaking of which, I AM NOT A HALF-BLOOD! End of discussion. And don't call my Voldy.
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posted by slytherin360
1. Refer to other people as "filty mudbloods"

2. Throw away your comb, wewe won't need it.

3. Practice making your laugh as insane as possible

4. Be prepared to spend your life in Azkaban

5. Get a dark mark tatooed on your arm

6. Constantly explain to people theories about why wewe think that Voldemort is actually not dead

7. Actually go searching for Voldemort

8. Scream Crucio at numerous muggles and demand information on the whereabouts of voldemort

9. Constantly change the conversation topic to voldemort

10. Insist that people call wewe "Bella"

11. Stay out of the sun. The paler your skin is, the better...
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Source: Me, :)