BLUE UNICORN: Hey, Charlie. Hey Charlie wake up.
PINK UNICORN: Yeah Charlie. You silly sleepy-head, wake up.
CHARLIE THE UNICORN: {Groans} Oh God you guys. This better be pretty freakin' important. Is the meadow on fire?
BLUE UNICORN: No Charlie. We found a map, to Candy Mountain, Candy Mountain Charlie.
PINK UNICORN: Yeah, Charlie, we`re going to Candy Mountain. Come with us Charlie.
BLUE UNICORN: Yeah Charlie, it`ll be an adventure. We`re going on an adventure Charlie.
CHARLIE THE UNICORN: Yeah, Candy Mountain, right. I`m just gonna, you know, go back to sleep now.
BLUE UNICORN: {Jumping onto Charlie's back} Noooo, Charlie. You have to come with us to Candy Mountain.
PINK UNICORN: Yeah, Charlie, Candy Mountain. It's a land of sweets and joy...and joyness.
CHARLIE THE UNICORN: Please stop bouncing on me.
BLUE UNICORN: {Still jumping up and down on Charlie} Candy Mountain Charlie.
PINK UNICORN: Yeah! Candy Mountain!
CHARLIE THE UNICORN: Alright, fine! I'll come with you to Candy Mountain.
{Cuts to a forest say as they all walk through a meadow}

BLUE AND PINK UNICORNS: {Singing} Lalalala, lalalala, lalalala, {continued}
CHARLIE THE UNICORN: Gah, enough with the singing already.
BLUE UNICORN: Our first stop is over there, Charlie.
{The trio stops by a large dark-greenish creature}

CHARLIE THE UNICORN: Oh God, what is that?
BLUE UNICORN: It's a Liopleurodon, Charlie.
PINK UNICORN: A magical Liopleurodon.
BLUE UNICORN: It's gonna guide our way to Candy Mountain.
CHARLIE UNICORN: Alright, guys, you do know that there is no actual Candy Mountain, right?
BLUE UNICORN: Shun the non-believer.
PINK UNICORN: Shhhunnn.
BLUE UNICORN: Shhhhhuunnnnnnn-naa
CHARLIE THE UNICORN: Yeah.
{The Liopleurodon groans}

BLUE UNICORN: It has spoken.
PINK UNICORN: It's told us the waaaaay.
CHARLIE THE UNICORN: It didn't say anything!
BLUE UNICORN: It's just over this bridge, Charlie.
PINK UNICORN: This magical bridge of hope and wonder.
CHARLIE THE UNICORN: Is anyone else getting, like, covered in splinters? Seriously, you guys, we shouldn't be on this thing.
BLUE UNICORN: Charlie... Charlie~... Charlie~... Cha~~
CHARLIE THE UNICORN: I'm right here! What do you want?!
BLUE UNICORN: We're on a bridge, Charlie.
{Cuts to the trio approaching Candy Mountain}

PINK UNICORN: We're here.
CHARLIE THE UNICORN: Well, what do you know? There actually is a Candy Mountain.
BLUE UNICORN: {Dancing and singing} Candy Mountain, Candy Mountain, you fill me with sweet sugary goodness.
PINK UNICORN: Go inside the Candy Mountain cave, Charlie.
BLUE UNICORN: Yeah, Charlie, go inside the cave. Magical wonders that will behold when you enter.
CHARLIE THE UNICORN: Yeah, uh, thanks, but no thanks. I'm gonna stay out here.
PINK UNICORN: But you have to enter the Candy Mountain candy cave, Charlie.
{Five letters (C, A, N, D, and Y) appear from Candy Mountain and sing and dance.}

Y: Oh, when you're down and looking for some cheering up,

Then just head right on up to the Candy Mountain cave.
When you get inside you'll find yourself a cheery land,
Such a happy and joyful and perky merry land.
They got lollipops and gummy drops and candy things,
And so many things that will brighten up your day.
It's impossible to wear a frown in Candy Town,
It's the mecca of love in the candy cave. They got jellybeans and coconuts with little hats,
Candy rats, chocolate bats, it's a wonderland of sweets.
Ride the candy train to town and hear the candy band,
Candy bells, it's a treat as they march across the land.
Cherry ribbons stream across the sky into the ground,
Turn around, it astounds, it's the dancing candy tree.
In the candy cave imagination runs so free,
So, Charlie, please will you go into the cave?

{The five letters collide and burst into flames}

CHARLIE THE UNICORN: All right, fine, I'll go into the freaking candy cave. This had better be good. {enters Candy Mountain}
BLUE AND PINK UNICORNS: {voices only} Yeah....
BLUE UNICORN: Goodbye, Charlie.
PINK UNICORN: Yeah, goodbye, Charlie.
CHARLIE THE UNICORN: Goodbye, what?
{The cave is flooded with darkness}

CHARLIE THE UNICORN: Hey, what's going on here? Hello? Who is that?
{Muffled sounds are heard to indicate that Charlie is being knocked out}

{Cuts to seen of a meadow where Charlie lies on the ground with an incision on his side}

CHARLIE THE UNICORN: Oh, God, what happened? {notices the cut} Oh, they took my freakin' kidney!