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posted by Yankeesam32935
The Secrets We Keep- Chapter One

She had to go back to New York, it was past time. Blair took a kiti, kiti cha in her spacious living room and sat down in a relic armchair that dated back to the fifteen hundreds. She had been living in France for the last four years ever since she had run away after the horrible night that Chuck’s father had died. No one knew the true reason that she had disappeared and she certainly wasn’t going to venture that information.
The last four years of her life had been stressful to say the least but she had been happy here in France. Her mother had moved with her and she had opened Waldorf Designs in Paris. Blair had gone into the field of fashion herself and was becoming a highly touted designer for the company. That’s when her life had changed. She had met Ben who was her mother’s assistant and they had embarked on a whirlwind romance.
Ben had turned out to be everything for her. He was an extremely attractive man in the way that he was blond, blue eyed, and muscular. Everything that Chuck wasn’t in another word. She aliiba a glance down at her ring finger and smiled at the diamond that rested on it. Ben had proposed to her a few months zamani and they had yet to set a date. She loved him au at least she thought she did.
Eleanor was now heading back to the States to do another collection for the line and Blair had no choice to accompany her back there. They were all going. She hadn’t seen anyone from the Upper East Side in four years but that was all about to change. It was time to go back to New York and finally face her past. The only problem with this was that she didn’t want to see Chuck. After she had left it had taken her a good two years to get over him and she still wasn’t completely sure that she was over him for good. The problem with seeing him was that it was going to bring all of those feelings rushing back to her. And with her being back in New York for good it was impossible that he wouldn’t find out what she had been keeping from him all of these years. She knew that Chuck bass, besi was going to find out her deadly secret and that thought scared her enough that she didn’t even want to go back. There was no turning back now though; she was headed back to New York in less than twenty four hours.

XOXO
She had finally finished packing and now all that was left was to tell Serena the news. She was the only person that Blair had continued talking to after she had left. Their friendship wasn’t as close as it once was but they still would always be there for each other through anything. Blair sat down at the dawati and picked up the phone. She twirled the cord nervously around her finger while she dialed Serena’s number.
After a few rings, Serena picked up. “Hello?”
Blair smiled at the sound of her friend’s voice. She missed her. “Hi Serena, it’s me.”
“Blair!” Serena squealed with excitement. “I haven’t heard from wewe in a while, it’s exactly so good to hear your voice.”
“You too, S.” They had never gotten out of the stage of calling each other kwa their first initial. “How are things?”
“Good, Blair. Nate thinks I’m pregnant again and he’s over the moon. I keep telling him that we shouldn’t have a baby so soon after Patrick but he says that he doesn’t care. To tell wewe the truth, I think I am pregnant again. I’ve being feeling so hormonal not to mention incredibly horny.”
Blair laughed with Glee at her statement. Serena and Nate had hooked up a couple of months after Blair had left and she had never been angry about it. She had finally realized that she had never loved Nate; she just loved the idea of being with him and what he stood for. She had only loved Chu… She told her mind to stop thinking off him and focused back on her conversation with Serena.
“I’m happy for you, Serena. wewe have made such a life for yourself and I really couldn’t be zaidi proud of wewe for it. How is my godchild kwa the way?”
Serena groaned. “He’s in the terrible twos stage. He screams at everything and whatever wewe ask him to do he has a problem with. His inayopendelewa word is no.”
She laughed even harder at this. “Who does he look like, S?”
“Nate.” She laughed. “He looks exactly like his father; I mean sometimes I have a hard time thinking that he’s actually mine. That’s how much he looks like Nate.”
“I’ll be seeing him soon.”
“What?” Serena asked, not quite believing her ears.
Blair smiled over the phone; she couldn’t wait to see Serena. “I’m coming nyumbani for good, Serena. My mother got a contract to make a line in the states and as I’m her juu designer I will be accompanying her.”
“Oh my god, B! I can’t wait to see you. It’s been so long and I’ve missed seeing my best friend every day.”
“I know, that has been one of the things I have missed the most too. Ben’s coming with me, Serena. You’re finally going to meet my fiancé.”
“He must be pretty special if he convinced wewe to marry him. I can’t wait until I meet him. So, you’re going to get married here in New York?”
“Yeah, I was thinking about the Plaza for our wedding.”
A sad grin tilted the corners of Serena’s mouth. “That sounds amazing. I always wanted a big wedding but Nate and I just wound up eloping instead.”
A plan occurred to her suddenly. “We could always have a double wedding, Serena. wewe could have the wedding wewe never had and Ben and I would be married at the same time. Nothing would make me happier then to get married at the same time as my best friend.”
“Do wewe mean that, Blair?”
“Yes.” She could tell how excited Serena was kwa the whole idea.
“That sounds like the most amazing plan ever and I want nothing zaidi than to do it with you, Blair. I’ve always considered wewe to as a sister.”
At her words, Blair knew that she was doing the right thing kwa returning to New York. She missed it there and of course Serena was there. “Same goes for me, S. I’ll see wewe later tomorrow, okay?”
“I’ll pick wewe up at that airport.”
They alisema their goodbyes and hung up. Blair was excited beyond belief now to go back. France was a great place but it could no way compare to New York. The sights, the sounds, the people, everything was just historic about the place. And of course there was a brown haired and brown eyed devil that she convinced herself she didn’t want to see but he really was behind the reason for her whole visit.

XOXO
Blair moved onto the deck with Ben after they had finished eating dinner. She sat down in a chair and swirled the dhahabu liquid around in her wine glass. She was Lost in her own thoughts until she heard Ben ask, “Are wewe excited to go back to New York, Blair?”
She grinned at him. “Yes and no. I upendo New York and I always will but in a way I am sad to leave this place since it has been my nyumbani for the last four years. It’s going to be hard, Ben.”
He nodded resolutely while he took a sip of scotch. Whenever she saw someone else drinking scotch it always brought back a picture of someone else doing the same thing.
After a few dakika of silence she asked, “I’ve been thinking of having our wedding at the Plaza, what do wewe think about that? I also invited Serena to have a double wedding with us since she never actually had a real one.”
He waved his hand around. “Whatever wewe want, Blair.” He dismissed her question. “What about your friends? Are wewe excited to see them?”
A grin titled the corners of her mouth. “Yes, I’m very excited to see Serena. I haven’t seen in her in so long and when I was talking to her today I realized how much I really do miss her. It hasn’t been easy for me, Ben.”
He grabbed her hand and placed a quick kiss in the palm of it. “I know. Everything’s going to be okay though, Blair. And even if it’s not, I’ll be there with wewe along every step of the way.”
She smiled. “Thank you.”
He moved his chair over so that he was closer to her. “What about Nate and that other man’s name that I’ve heard wewe mention to Serena, Chuck was it? Are wewe excited to see them?”
Her eyes had been wandering around the backyard and had lighted on the pool. She would have to have one last swim before leaving. There was nothing better than a nighttime swim. At her question, she quickly brought her head around to face him. “Nate? Chuck?”
“Yeah, don’t sound so surprised Blair. wewe never mention anyone from your life other than Serena and I do want to know everything about you. We’re getting married soon, it’s time wewe tell me some things that happened to wewe in New York.”
Her mouth suddenly felt very dry. “Okay.” She whispered. “You have to promise not to judge me though.”
“I would never judge you. I upendo wewe Blair, I hope wewe never forget that.”
She nodded and thought back to the pain that had been her past in New York. “Nate as wewe know is now married to Serena but he was actually my boyfriend for many years. I always thought that I was madly in upendo with him but then everything changed one night and I knew that I just loved the idea of Nate and what he represented instead of actually being in upendo with him.”
“What made wewe realize that?”
Blair sighed but she couldn’t help the smirk that came over her lips. “Chuck bass, besi did. Chuck was always Nate’s best friend and Chuck was always somebody that I found disgusting and perverted. He basically only cares about four things, Nate, money, drinking, and womanizing.”
“Wow, he sounds like a great guy.” Ben scoffed.
Her grin disappeared. “He’s actually the reason that I’m the person that I am today. He helped me find the real me.”
He frowned. “I still don’t understand how wewe realized that wewe weren’t in upendo with Nate.”
“Oh, that. One night Nate and I had another huge argument and we broke up. I went looking for Chuck. We had always been Marafiki and I knew that if anyone could cheer me up, it would be Chuck. I found him at his club and to make a long story short, he dared me to dance onstage at the club, I did, he offered me a ride nyumbani and I accepted, and then we had sex in the back of his limo.”
She couldn’t help but laugh at the expression on his face. “Are wewe serious, Blair?”
His swali made her giggle even more. “I am. That’s when I knew that I didn’t upendo Nate. At first I thought I just had sex with Chuck to get over Nate but that wasn’t the case at all. There was just always something between us. Some underlying sexual tension and not to mention the fact that we were always scheming against someone.”
He couldn’t help but be intrigued kwa all of this. “What happened after that night?”
A sad smile came over her face. “We basically had an affair behind Nate’s back. A couple of weeks later Nate found out and he wrote both of us off. Later in the mwaka though Nate forgave the both of us.”
“What happened between wewe and Chuck?”
The pain still came back to her at the mere mention of his name. Recalling her past with him was not helping in the least. “Well, there was still always this pull between Chuck and I. We will go back and forth between each other every so often but we never made it work. We were both too stubborn to admit how we felt. One thing about Chuck though, he was a womanizer in the worst sort of way and never bedded the same woman twice. That wasn’t the case for me and I knew that he cared zaidi for me than any other person in his life. He never told me he loved me though and after his father died that’s when I left and came here to France.”
“Did wewe upendo him, Blair?”
“I did. When I was a teenager, he was always the one that understood me and got me. He’s the only man that I ever loved.”
Ben gave her a pointed look.
“What?” Blair suddenly realized what she had alisema and gulped in a quick breath of air. “Before wewe of course.”
He stood up abruptly before bending down and taking her hand. “Do wewe still have feelings for him, Blair?”
She shook her head hurriedly. “No, of course not. How can I have feelings for someone that I haven’t seen in four years? I was just reminiscing about him, Ben. wewe know that I upendo you.”
He didn’t look convinced. “I trust wewe Blair, so I will take your word for it. I’m going to go up to kitanda since we have a long siku ahead of us tomorrow. Are wewe coming?”
“I’ll be up in a little while. I want go for a swim before turning in.”
“Sure.” He replied before leaving her alone.
As soon as he was gone, Blair stood up and stripped down until she was left in her chemise. She njiwa into the water and relished how the water felt over her body. She swam a few laps before coming to a stop. Ben’s swali about having feelings still for Chuck has caught her off guard. Ben was an amazing person but if she was honest with herself she would admit that his hair was the wrong color, his smirk wasn’t like someone else’s she knew, and he could never make her body hum like a certain bass, besi could do. Essentially she still had feelings for that so called Bass. She shut her eyes tightly and njiwa under the water.

XOXO
Serena walked through the van der Woodsen bass, besi nyumbani while she still along with, Patrick, Nate, and Chuck. Blair was due to arrive at the airport within the saa and she still had to find Chuck and tell him that Blair was coming back. He would undoubtedly kwa furious kwa the news. He still hadn’t quite gotten over the fact that she had left all those years ago.
It had been hard for her when Blair left; she had Lost her best friend along with the one person that had always stood kwa her. After she had left, things had quickly fallen apart with Dan once they had discovered that they shared a sibling. Serena had never really been attracted to Nate even while she had cheated with him while he was still with Blair. Though all of that changed when he had been there for her when she had broken up with Dan and the rest was history now.
After Bart’s death, she had become extremely close with Chuck. They were siblings and they loved each other through everything. Their relationship had entirely changed once Bart died; there were no zaidi sly innuendos, au anything else between them. Chuck had changed when his father had died.
She continued walking through the house and finally found him in the parlor with a glass of something in his hand that she presumed was scotch.
“Chuck.”
He turned around and grinned at her. “Sis. Do wewe find out if you’re pregnant again?”
She returned his smile. “I’m not really sure yet, it’s still too early. But I think Nate’s entirely right in thinking that I am.”
He chuckled. “Leave it to Nate.”
Serena cleared her throat. “I have something to tell wewe and I’m afraid you’re not going to be happy about it.”
He set his drink down and immediately went over to her. “What is it? Are wewe in trouble?”
She shook her head. “It’s nothing like that. I’m fine and so is everyone else. In about an saa we’re going to have a visitor.”
“Who?” He asked, curious about who was coming.
“Blair. She’s moving back to New York permanently.”
His whole demeanor changed instantly and the easy grin that had been on his face turned to anger. Just hearing her name again after all this time sent shivers down her spine. “Shit. So after all of these years she’s finally going to onyesha her face again?”
“It was a long time ago, Chuck. You’ve got to get over it eventually.”
“Are wewe fucking serious, Serena?” Chuck managed to growl out through his anger. “She left the siku after my father died. After she told me that she loved me and would stand kwa me through anything. How would wewe feel if she did that to you?”
Serena admitted defeat. “I know that wewe have a right to be angry but…”
He interrupted her. “But nothing, what she did was the lowest thing that is humanely possible. Why the hell is she coming back now?”
She sighed. “I’ve tried to tell wewe what’s been going on in her life for years now but wewe never wanted to hear it. wewe do now?”
“Just tell me why the fuck she’s coming back now. Is it to fuck around with me again?”
“Chuck.” She berated. “Blair’s coming back because she’s the head designer of Waldorf Designs and their doing a line here specifically for New York. But she is staying indefinitely.” Serena took a deep breath before relaying the inayofuata piece of news. “She’s going to get married in a couple of months.”
How words knocked whatever fight he had left in him. “She’s engaged?”
“Yeah, I’m sorry.” She laid a hand on his shoulder.
“I don’t care.”
“You’ve moved on, Chuck. I mean you’re always with a new woman, wewe never even cared about Blair. Did you?”
He gave her a hard look. “That’s where wewe wrong, sis. I cared zaidi about Blair than I’ve ever cared about another human being in my life. Even zaidi than Nate.” He walked away from Serena and headed out the door.
Serena watched him leave and knew that keeping these two from ripping each other’s throats out was going to be a very difficult task. She picked up her mfuko wa fedha, mfuko and headed out the door to pick up Blair from the airport.

XOXO
Blair walked through the house on her guard to be on the lookout for Chuck. Although Serena had told her that he wasn’t there. She turned around the corner and saw Nate.
“Nate.” She alisema with excitement.
Nate put down his paperwork and ran over to her and lifted her in a kubeba hug. “Blair! wewe look great, B.”
“So do you. You’re zaidi handsome than ever and I have to admit that you’ve landed quite a good wife in Serena.”
He laughed with joy. “Yeah, I certainly have. Have wewe seen Patrick yet?”
She shook her head. “Serena alisema that she was going to bring him down.”
They chatted for a few dakika until they heard Serena coming down the stairs. Blair turned around and for the first time she saw her godchild. She walked over and plucked him from Serena’s arms. “Oh, wewe weren’t kidding S when wewe alisema that he was a little Nate mini me.”
They both laughed and Nate hooked an arm around Serena’s waist. “We’re glad that wewe finally get to see your godchild, Blair.”
Blair smiled with glee. “You know I’m going to spoil him, right?”
Serena laughed. “Yes, I figured wewe would. His godfather spoils him pretty much though, so I wouldn’t worry about that if I were you.”
“Who’s the godfather?” Blair asked out of curiosity.
Serena looked at Nate but it was she who answered quietly, “Chuck.”
His name still sent a fluttering of butterflies through her entire body.
Serena quickly changed the subject. “So where is this fiancé of yours? Ben?”
“He actually had to take care of some last dakika things with my mother but he’ll be here within a week.”
Serena ruffled her son’s hair before saying, “Blair, I need to ask wewe something.”
She handed Patrick to Nate. “Sure. What is it?”
“My mother was excited to hear that wewe were coming back to New York and decided to thrown a little gala in your honor.”
“Wow. That’s so nice of Lily. I would upendo to go, when is it?”
Serena winched. “That’s the problem; the only night she could organize it on was tonight. Is that alright? wewe really have to go Blair since you’re the reason it’s being thrown.”
Blair tapped her fingers against the side of her leg. “It wouldn’t be a problem except that I don’t have anything to wear. A lot of my luggage is still in France.”
Nate chuckled. “I think wewe forget who your best friend is, Blair. Serena’s got a whole closet of things that wewe could wear.”
They all laughed. Blair threw her hands up in the air. “Alright, sounds like my first night back is sure to be an exciting one at that. It’s like I was never gone. Is he going to be there, S?”
Serena didn’t even have to ask who because she knew who Blair was referring too. “He will be, Blair.”
She took a kiti, kiti cha on the sofa and contemplated what would happen that night at the gala. After a four mwaka absence she was about to meet up with Chuck again for the first time. She had to make sure she was prepared for it, since Blair was determined not to let him ever find out what she had been keeping from him for the last four years.

To Be Continued…

A/N: Another new story in the works for me. I’m a little bit of a workhorse when it comes to writing. Alright, this is the first chapter and I’m not entirely sure on it. So if anyone wants me to continue this wewe must review it. Please? I will be updating Temptation of the Best Kind next. Hopefully kwa Saturday.
-Sam-
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