Hogwarts House Rivalry! Club
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posted by simpleplan
Knock knock?
Who's there?
wewe Know.
You-Know-Who?
That's right!Avada Kedavra!

How do wewe keep a Gryffindor in suspense? *walk away*

How many weasley's does it take to light up a wand?
Seven: Ginny to look upset and do nothing, Ron to sulk, Fred and George to blow it up, Percy to yell, Charlie to hold it in front of a dragon and Bill to roll his eyes at everyone.

How many Dark Lords does it take to light up a wand?
Two: One to light it and the other to kill him and take the credit.

How many Voldemorts does it take to light up a wand?
None, now wewe see thats why he's called the DARK lord.

How many Weasleys does it take to light up a wand?
~~~One, but they'll have to tafuta through a pile of the twins' fake ones first.

Why did Potter kuvuka, msalaba the road?
No reason, but someone will write a book about it.

Why do Slytherins kuvuka, msalaba the road twice?
Because they are doublecrossers.

Why was Professor Quirrel kicked out of the beauty contest?
He had voldeWART on the back of his head

Is being a dementor a fun job? No, it’s soul destroying!

Wormtail: Master, can wewe really rise again? Voldemort: Certainly, but wewe may have to give me a hand!

Sticks & Stones can break my bones, But words will never hurt me.
AVADA KEDAVERA
Oh dang

If there are any idiots in the room, will they please stand up," alisema the sarcastic Professor Snape.
After a long silence, one first mwaka rose to his feet.
"Now then mister, why do wewe consider yourself an idiot?" Inquired Snape with a sneer.
"Well, actually I don't," alisema the student, "but I hate to see wewe standing up there all kwa yourself."

A blind wizard walks into a pub. He says to the barkeep, "Want to hear a Hufflepuff joke?" The pub goes completely silent. The barkeep says, "Sir, I am a Hufflepuff. I'm used to handling a rough crowd alone. I have my wand drawn. The wizard to your left is an auror with his wand drawn. He too is a Hufflepuff. The witch on your right has her wand drawn. She is a dueling champion and also a Hufflepuff. Are wewe absolutely certain wewe want to tell that Hufflepuff joke?"
The blind wizard says, "Gods no! Not if I'm going to have to explain it three times!"

Where do wewe find Dumbledore’s Army? Up his sleevy!
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