Chapter 4.
Pretending to be someone else wasn't easy. I knew it after all of this time I'd pretended to be someone else—someone who was not me.
I knew that kwa doing thing like this, it would be just like fooling my own self. I always knew that even kwa pretending like this, it would never change me. Deep inside, I would be always the same Ichigo. I would always be the scary punk who was good for nothing but fighting. No matter how hard I'd tried, I could never run away from who I really am.
I didn't even know why I did it. Did I really do this only to impress Akayama? It hurt me when she alisema that she was scared of me—that I would never be good enough for her. I didn't do this for that. I didn't do this to change her mind, to make her accept me. I did it to prove myself that I could be someone different. That I could be just like what she thought I ought to be.
I did it for myself.
"After we entered the same high school, I was surprised that Kurosaki changed. He dyed his hair back and became the student council member and joined the discipline committee. Maybe, it was all because of me."
No, she was wrong.
She was wrong but I didn't say anything to correct her. I just stood there, hidden kwa the shadow so the three girls couldn't see me. I saw the machungwa, chungwa haired girl stood there with tears on her big gray eyes but she tried so hard not to let the tears fall. I knew she was a strong girl.
"Now wewe get it? Don't get your hope too high! Kurosaki likes someone like Hitomi, why would he looks at someone like you? Do wewe understand?"
I still didn't say anything. I felt so bad that I couldn't say something to correct her but I needed to watch this.
"Stop it, Kanako. It's enough."
"No! This weirdo needs to be taught her position! He had ruined Kurosaki image! If she were with him for too long, he wouldn't cool anymore! Now that Hitomi has broken up with her boyfriend she has a chance to get him back."
I held myself from snickering. Owh, really…
"It isn't too late… If I alisema I would be his girlfriend this time maybe he would try harder to change…"
I was about to laugh at this when I heard her scolded Akayama.
"Don't say something bad about Kurosaki-kun! wewe don't know! Kurosaki-kun is Kurosaki-kun! Maybe he changed for wewe but he is still him! Deep inside he's just Kurosaki-kun and will always be cool, that wouldn't be changed! If wewe can't accept him for who he was, wewe don't deserve him!"
"What are wewe talking about, huh!"
Yes, what are wewe talking about?
"I like him! For whoever he is!"
I saw her running away leaving the other two girls. I couldn't help myself but to smile. What a weird girl. She alisema something cool like that with teary eyes, she protected a man like me, and she confessed her feeling to me not directly to my face but in front of these two girls. What a girl… I would have to talk about it later with her. Now I have something else to do…
"I never know that wewe think of me that way…"
I walked leaving the shadow which has protected me until just now. The two girls looked surprised to see me there.
"Ku-kurosaki?"
I sighed, "…I'm sorry."
She looked at me.
"I quit."
When I was young, I was really close with my mother. Even after my sisters were born, my mother would still call me her lover boy. She told me how she loved my hair and though the teachers at school told me to dye it black, my mother would tell me not to listen to them. She came to see my teacher and explain them that my hair had been always like that.
Even after she passed away, I still remembered how she used to ruffle my hair. I refused to dye my hair black even after I entered junior high school though apparently my hair color attracted those punks. Many kids from other school came to pick a fight with me just because of my hair. I didn't like to fight but I wouldn't just let anyone hit me without fight back. When I realized it, I had been famous as the punk kid who only knew how to fight.
I had never thought about whatever people talked about me behind my back until that siku when I confessed my feeling for Akayama.
I had liked her because of his image. She had a big black eyes and long black hair, she looked so perfect that I adored her. She gave me a bandage once and since then I couldn't take my eyes away from her. I thought she was different. I thought she understood me but I was wrong. She told me that she was scared.
I looked at my reflection in the mirror.
I quit.
I had decided it. I quit.
When I walked to the school that morning, I felt so many eyes on me. I heard them whispering about me too but I didn't care. I had decided about this and I would not regret it.
I scowled as I walked passing the school gate. Akasaka and the other members of discipline committee didn't look happy when they saw me. They were zaidi that shocked. Akasaka bit her lower lip before then looked away.
"I quit."
"You will regret it."
She still didn't want to look at me.
"Maybe, but not now."
"Fine. Do as wewe wish."
I smirked, "Of course."
I started to walk leaving those people when someone screamed calling my name. Even before I turned to see, I knew who it was.
"Kurosaki-kun!"
It must be… eh?
"Inoue?"
The way she looked at me was just mirroring the way I looked at her. People around us stopped walking and turned at us to watch. I blinked my eyes, couldn't believe at what I see. I saw she has the same expression on her face.
"What the…"
"Why?"
We alisema in unison.
She shook her head before she quickly walked closer to see me better. Her cute pink lips formed a little 'o'. I still couldn't take my eyes away from her.
"Your hair!" she pointed at my now natural machungwa, chungwa hair, "Y-your uniform! wewe don't wear your tie! And… and…" she shook her head again as if she tried to clear her mind, "No… There must be something wrong!" She looked scared now, "What are wewe doing! If the others see you…"
I laughed, "They are looking at me right now."
"But you're a member of…"
"I quit."
"B-but…"
I rubbed under my nose, "I quit the committee and I also quit pretending."
"Kurosaki-kun…"
"So, what about you? What the hell are wewe wearing?" I scowled at her new style.
Her big gray eyes were hidden under a pair of glasses, her long hair was now black and braided and her skirt, upindo was reaching her knees. This was not Inoue I knew.
"I… I want to change my style." She mumbled shyly.
"Huh why?"
"You… wewe like someone like Hitomi-san, so I…"
"Stupid!" I laughed, "And wewe think that I would like wewe if wewe started to dress up zaidi like her?"
She bit her lower lip and looked down, "I don't know…" she sighed, "So wewe stop pretending?"
I smiled, "Yeah. Sooner au later people would find out anyway."
"So we can't be together anymore? The contract is finished?"
"Huh?"
Her big orbs were filled kwa tears now. I saw it thought her eyes were hidden kwa her bang now. Is she going to cry?
"You desperately wanted to end our contract?"
I couldn't help it anymore.
I grabbed her hand and pulled her toward me. I tilted her head and kissed her lips. It seemed like I startled her that she was no longer crying. I pulled away and smiled when I saw her expression. The way her face reddened just made me wanted to kiss her again.
"Stupid." I smirked, "I do this for you."
I pulled her into a hug.
"K-kurosaki kun, everybody's watching us!"
"Let them be."
"B-but."
"Rather than that," I sighed, "Would wewe do something for me?"
"W-what?"
"Just be your usual self okay?"
"…"
"Promise me?"
"Okay."
I smiled, "Good. I don't want wewe to pretend to be anyone for me."
"Okay."
"So, are wewe ready?"
"Eh, ready to what?"
I tilted her head once again and touched my forehead to hers, "To be mine forever."
She laughed, "Yes!"
I smiled and kissed her lips once again.
End.
Pretending to be someone else wasn't easy. I knew it after all of this time I'd pretended to be someone else—someone who was not me.
I knew that kwa doing thing like this, it would be just like fooling my own self. I always knew that even kwa pretending like this, it would never change me. Deep inside, I would be always the same Ichigo. I would always be the scary punk who was good for nothing but fighting. No matter how hard I'd tried, I could never run away from who I really am.
I didn't even know why I did it. Did I really do this only to impress Akayama? It hurt me when she alisema that she was scared of me—that I would never be good enough for her. I didn't do this for that. I didn't do this to change her mind, to make her accept me. I did it to prove myself that I could be someone different. That I could be just like what she thought I ought to be.
I did it for myself.
"After we entered the same high school, I was surprised that Kurosaki changed. He dyed his hair back and became the student council member and joined the discipline committee. Maybe, it was all because of me."
No, she was wrong.
She was wrong but I didn't say anything to correct her. I just stood there, hidden kwa the shadow so the three girls couldn't see me. I saw the machungwa, chungwa haired girl stood there with tears on her big gray eyes but she tried so hard not to let the tears fall. I knew she was a strong girl.
"Now wewe get it? Don't get your hope too high! Kurosaki likes someone like Hitomi, why would he looks at someone like you? Do wewe understand?"
I still didn't say anything. I felt so bad that I couldn't say something to correct her but I needed to watch this.
"Stop it, Kanako. It's enough."
"No! This weirdo needs to be taught her position! He had ruined Kurosaki image! If she were with him for too long, he wouldn't cool anymore! Now that Hitomi has broken up with her boyfriend she has a chance to get him back."
I held myself from snickering. Owh, really…
"It isn't too late… If I alisema I would be his girlfriend this time maybe he would try harder to change…"
I was about to laugh at this when I heard her scolded Akayama.
"Don't say something bad about Kurosaki-kun! wewe don't know! Kurosaki-kun is Kurosaki-kun! Maybe he changed for wewe but he is still him! Deep inside he's just Kurosaki-kun and will always be cool, that wouldn't be changed! If wewe can't accept him for who he was, wewe don't deserve him!"
"What are wewe talking about, huh!"
Yes, what are wewe talking about?
"I like him! For whoever he is!"
I saw her running away leaving the other two girls. I couldn't help myself but to smile. What a weird girl. She alisema something cool like that with teary eyes, she protected a man like me, and she confessed her feeling to me not directly to my face but in front of these two girls. What a girl… I would have to talk about it later with her. Now I have something else to do…
"I never know that wewe think of me that way…"
I walked leaving the shadow which has protected me until just now. The two girls looked surprised to see me there.
"Ku-kurosaki?"
I sighed, "…I'm sorry."
She looked at me.
"I quit."
When I was young, I was really close with my mother. Even after my sisters were born, my mother would still call me her lover boy. She told me how she loved my hair and though the teachers at school told me to dye it black, my mother would tell me not to listen to them. She came to see my teacher and explain them that my hair had been always like that.
Even after she passed away, I still remembered how she used to ruffle my hair. I refused to dye my hair black even after I entered junior high school though apparently my hair color attracted those punks. Many kids from other school came to pick a fight with me just because of my hair. I didn't like to fight but I wouldn't just let anyone hit me without fight back. When I realized it, I had been famous as the punk kid who only knew how to fight.
I had never thought about whatever people talked about me behind my back until that siku when I confessed my feeling for Akayama.
I had liked her because of his image. She had a big black eyes and long black hair, she looked so perfect that I adored her. She gave me a bandage once and since then I couldn't take my eyes away from her. I thought she was different. I thought she understood me but I was wrong. She told me that she was scared.
I looked at my reflection in the mirror.
I quit.
I had decided it. I quit.
When I walked to the school that morning, I felt so many eyes on me. I heard them whispering about me too but I didn't care. I had decided about this and I would not regret it.
I scowled as I walked passing the school gate. Akasaka and the other members of discipline committee didn't look happy when they saw me. They were zaidi that shocked. Akasaka bit her lower lip before then looked away.
"I quit."
"You will regret it."
She still didn't want to look at me.
"Maybe, but not now."
"Fine. Do as wewe wish."
I smirked, "Of course."
I started to walk leaving those people when someone screamed calling my name. Even before I turned to see, I knew who it was.
"Kurosaki-kun!"
It must be… eh?
"Inoue?"
The way she looked at me was just mirroring the way I looked at her. People around us stopped walking and turned at us to watch. I blinked my eyes, couldn't believe at what I see. I saw she has the same expression on her face.
"What the…"
"Why?"
We alisema in unison.
She shook her head before she quickly walked closer to see me better. Her cute pink lips formed a little 'o'. I still couldn't take my eyes away from her.
"Your hair!" she pointed at my now natural machungwa, chungwa hair, "Y-your uniform! wewe don't wear your tie! And… and…" she shook her head again as if she tried to clear her mind, "No… There must be something wrong!" She looked scared now, "What are wewe doing! If the others see you…"
I laughed, "They are looking at me right now."
"But you're a member of…"
"I quit."
"B-but…"
I rubbed under my nose, "I quit the committee and I also quit pretending."
"Kurosaki-kun…"
"So, what about you? What the hell are wewe wearing?" I scowled at her new style.
Her big gray eyes were hidden under a pair of glasses, her long hair was now black and braided and her skirt, upindo was reaching her knees. This was not Inoue I knew.
"I… I want to change my style." She mumbled shyly.
"Huh why?"
"You… wewe like someone like Hitomi-san, so I…"
"Stupid!" I laughed, "And wewe think that I would like wewe if wewe started to dress up zaidi like her?"
She bit her lower lip and looked down, "I don't know…" she sighed, "So wewe stop pretending?"
I smiled, "Yeah. Sooner au later people would find out anyway."
"So we can't be together anymore? The contract is finished?"
"Huh?"
Her big orbs were filled kwa tears now. I saw it thought her eyes were hidden kwa her bang now. Is she going to cry?
"You desperately wanted to end our contract?"
I couldn't help it anymore.
I grabbed her hand and pulled her toward me. I tilted her head and kissed her lips. It seemed like I startled her that she was no longer crying. I pulled away and smiled when I saw her expression. The way her face reddened just made me wanted to kiss her again.
"Stupid." I smirked, "I do this for you."
I pulled her into a hug.
"K-kurosaki kun, everybody's watching us!"
"Let them be."
"B-but."
"Rather than that," I sighed, "Would wewe do something for me?"
"W-what?"
"Just be your usual self okay?"
"…"
"Promise me?"
"Okay."
I smiled, "Good. I don't want wewe to pretend to be anyone for me."
"Okay."
"So, are wewe ready?"
"Eh, ready to what?"
I tilted her head once again and touched my forehead to hers, "To be mine forever."
She laughed, "Yes!"
I smiled and kissed her lips once again.
End.