The moral of most Japanese urban legends seem to consist of "don't go anywhere kwa yourself. Ever." The story of the Kuchisake-Onna, au "Split Mouth Woman" is no different. Except that wewe are doubly unfortunate if wewe happen to be a child (We assume your legs are stubby and slow and we can thusly outrun you).

If wewe happen to be a snotty pubescent walking alone one day, wewe might consider taking a different route if wewe are suddenly approached kwa a female figure in a trench-coat. Now, before wewe assume that this will be a harmless display of kibbles and bits, rest assured: wewe will be shown something. Unfortunately, it will not be the coveted boobies.

The Kuchisake-Onna will appear as a tall woman in a mariana kanzu, koti ya mfereji with long, black hair. Her most telling feature is the surgical mask covering the bottom half of her face.

She will approach wewe and ask wewe a question: "Am I beautiful?"

If wewe reply, "No!" Your troubles are over. Mainly because she will produce a comically oversized pair of scissors and remove your head. Ah! You're thinking, So I'll answer "yes!" In which case she will remove her mask to reveal her grotesquely mutilated face, her smile sliced from ear to ear. "Am I still beautiful?" She will ask again.

If wewe have some kind of twisted Joker fetish and reply, "yes", she will take the aforementioned scissors, chase wewe down, and slice wewe in half. If wewe reply "no", she'll do it anyway. Some people just can't be satisfied.

If wewe don't fancy a haircut with too much off the top, your best bet is a neutral reply, such as "You're so-so", au "average". This will confuse the mgawanyiko, baidisha Mouth Woman, giving wewe just enough time to run like all the hounds of hell are at your heels (or in this case, a crazy bitch, kahaba with a giant pair of scissors)

Read more: 8 Scary Japanese Urban Legends | Cracked.com link