This makala is slightly similar to the one I wrote a few months ago, link
. But I couldn't help reiterating. Sorry if it's a waste of time.
My whole life I have been fluctuating between gay and straight. It was only in my senior mwaka that I felt confident enough to come out to my close Marafiki in high school. I even had my first girlfriend. And being in such a warm, welcoming environment, I was able to openly discuss my feelings with others who shared them.
I found out that mwaka that not only was I
bisexual, but so were three
of my Marafiki who were previously calling themselves "straight," just like I was. One of these people was my girlfriend that year. And talking with them, I realized that I wasn't the only one who came to the conclusion of, "Well, since I like both, and I don't want to be the center of attention, I'll just focus on my straight-leaning side."
I've been seeing some concerns here that my Marafiki voiced back then. "Sometimes, I am totally into girls, and I think, 'maybe I'm a lesbian,' but then later, like even the inayofuata siku even, I'll be all, 'That guy is so frickin hot!' It's kind of making me wonder, if I do get a boyfriend/girlfriend, will I remain into them all the time?"
The fact of the matter is, no one
is into their significant other all
the time. Believe me, ask anyone
who has had a boyfriend/girlfriend for longer than six months and they'll tell wewe the same thing. What is important is that wewe want
to be with that person, regardless of what gender s/he is.
I have learned, through research, discussions, and my own experience that these fluctuations are normal. To me, bisexuality is one of the most beautiful things, because it doubles the opportunity for love. As Alyssa from "Chasing Amy" puts it, "The way the world is - how seldom wewe meet that one person who gets you... it's so rare... And to cut oneself off from finding that person - to immediately half your options kwa eliminating the possibility of finding that one person within your own gender... that just seemed stupid. So I didn't."
So just be reassured that it's OK to be confused about your sexuality and what to label yourself. link
supports the theory that the majority of people are bisexual. So try not to fret so much over labels. Feelings change, and it's completely normal. Just know that kwa not categorizing yourself, you're open to find upendo with anyone.