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posted by Seanthehedgehog
 Title Screen :D
Title Screen :D
Special thanks to AquaMarine6663 for letting me use her three OC's, Aqua Marine, Double Scoop, and Blue Fedora.

Our main character for this story is a mwana-, mwana-punda named Ralphie. He will be narrating this story, taking place in Indiana, 1948.

Ponies: *Walking on sidewalk, looking at the snow*
Colts: *Running down mitaani, mtaa passing a yellow house*

Ah, there it is. My old house. And there I am, with that ugly hat, and that dumb smile. No matter, krisimasi was on it's way. Good old, lovely Christmas.

Later at night.

Band Ponies: *Playing krisimasi muziki with trombones*

Downtown, everypony was getting prepared to celebrate the glorious holiday.

Band Ponies: *Playing Jingle Bells*
Colts & Fillies: *Walking to a toystore*
Adult Ponies: *Driving cars*
Police Pony: *Controlling traffic, and blowing whistle*
Ponies: *By a moto in a oil drum, and singing* Joy, going down the mountain, where Jesus Christ was born!
Band Ponies: *Playing zaidi krisimasi music*
Ralphie: *Standing in front of a toystore with his brother Randy, and other ponies*

Higbee's Toystore had a lot of things inside. Brand new wagons, were gleaming with red paint. Model airplanes were hanging from the ceiling. A toy tank was moving kwa itself, due to a wind up motor. Model trains were going around all the other toys. And then, I saw it. The red ryder carbine action two hundred shot range model air rifle. For weeks, I have been scheming a plan to get my hooves on one of those blue steeled beauties. I had tried many tricks that I thought were necessary to get that gun.

Ralphie: *Laying in kitanda with magazine*
Mother: *Downstairs in dining room* RALPHIE! RANDY! Get down here in two minutes, and I mean two minutes!
Randy: *Goes to dresser*
Ralphie: *Pushes Randy out of the way*
Randy: Come on Ralphie, I was here first!
Ralphie: Tough. *Looking for a pair of socks*
Randy: *Lightly punching, and kicking Ralphie*
Ralphie: Puts his socks on, and flips through pages of magazine* Cut it out Randy. *Runs to his parent's room* ah. *Finds page with an advertisement featuring the gun he wants, then puts it in his mother's magazine*

My mother would be grabbing her copy of Look Magazine, only to find a Red Ryder Sales Pitch.

Mother: *Preparing breakfast* What are wewe kusoma about this time?
Dad: Oh, just the news.
Mother: Why don't wewe tell me about it? *Looks up at ceiling* Ralphie, on the double!!
Ralphie: *Comes downstairs with Randy*
Dad: Did wewe hear about the one where that stallion swallowed a yoyo?
Mother: Where did that happen?
Dad: Some nut did it in Griffith Indiana. Listen to this. What is the name of the Lone Ranger's nephew's human?
Mother: Uh, Victor. His name was Victor.
Dad: How the hell did wewe know that?
Mother: Everypony knows that. Is this another one of your silly puzzles?
Dad: Yeah, another one of my silly puzzles. This one could be worth fifty thousand bucks.
Mother: What is it this time?
Dad: Name the great characters in Equestrian literature.
Mother: Victor?
Dad: Yeah.
Mother: The Lone Ranger's nephew's human?

Meanwhile, I was struggling for exactly the right BB gun hint. It had to be firm, but subtle.

Ralphie: Flick says he saw some grizzly bears near Pulaski's Candy store!
Dad, Mother, and Randy: *Staring at Ralphie*

They looked at me like I had lobsters crawling out of my ears. I could tell I was in imminent danger, of giving it away. Casually, I switched tactics.

Ralphie: hujambo dad.
Dad: Hm?
Ralphie: I'll bet wewe can't guess what I got wewe for Christmas.
Dad: A new furnace.
Ralphie: *Smiles* That's a good one dad.
Randy: *Laughs*
Mother: Hurry up with breakfast, au you'll be late for school.
Dad: *Checks watch* Holy smokes, I'm late already. *Stands up, and walks away*

Round 1 was over.

Parents: 1
Kids: 0

Then, the inevitable happened.

Mother: Ralphie, what would wewe like for Christmas?

Horrified, my mind went blank, and I blurted it out.

Ralphie: I want a red ryder carbine action two hundred shot range model air rifle. *Closes eyes* Oooh.
Mother: No. You'll shoot your eye out.

Oh, it was the classic mother BB gun block, you'll shoot your eye out.

Ralphie: Eh, I was just kidding mom. Even though Flick is getting one. I just decided I wanted some Tinker Toys.

I couldn't believe my ears! Tinker Toys? She wouldn't buy it.

Mother: BB guns are dangerous. I don't want wewe shooting your eye out.
Ralphie: *Glares at the table*
Mother: *Sees Randy refusing to eat his breakfast* Randy, will wewe eat? There are starving ponies in China.
Randy: Mhhh.
Ralphie: *Begins to have a fantasy*

Mothers know nothing about creeping marauders burrowing through the snow toward the jikoni where only wewe and wewe alone stand between your tiny, huddled family and insensate evil.

In the fantasy, four crooks were sneaking into the backyard.

Crook 4: * Climbing down a tire swing*
Crook 2: *Climbing down a tree*
Ralphie's Family: *Hiding under a table*
Ralphie: *Kicks door open, and holding his gun*
Mother: Save us Ralphie! I just knew those bad ponies would come for us in the end!
Ralphie: Don't worry. As long as I got Old Blue. *Referring to his gun* Well, what do we have here folks?
Dad: Well, we figure it's Black Bart Ralph.
Ralphie: Well, lucky for wewe that I got my trusty ol' red ryder carbine. With a compass on the stock. Well, I think I better have a look here folks. *Kneels on jikoni sink, and looks out window*
Crooks: *Lurking through backyard*
Ralphie: *Pointing gun out window*
Crook 1: Oh no, it's-
Crooks: Old Blue! Oh no!
Crook 1: Seize it boys, the jig is up.
Crook 2: *Climbing up fence*
Ralphie: *Shoots Crook 2 in his butt*
Crook 2: *Falls off fence, and dies*
Crook 4: *Getting on roof of garage*
Ralphie: *Shoots Crook 4*
Crook 4: *Falls on ground, and dies*
Dad: Keep hittin' em! Oh, he's a deadeye, ain't he?
Mother: *Shakes head yes*
Crook 3: *Climbing up a tree*
Ralphie: *Shoots Crook 3*
Crook 3: *Falls on ground, and dies*
Crook 1: Okay Ralph! wewe win this round, but we'll be back! *Goes over fence, jumps onto a human, and rides it away from Ralph*
Ralphie: Adios Bart! When wewe come back, you'll be pushing up Daisies.
Dead Crooks: *Have their eyes replaced with X's*
Ralphie: And don't wewe forget it!
Dad: Well done Ralph!
Mother: wewe saved us!
Randy: He's a hero!!

The ndoto ended, and so is this part.

The inayofuata part will be ilitumwa later.
 Ralphie
Ralphie
 Randy
Randy
 Ralphie's mother
Ralphie's mother
 Ralphie's Dad
Ralphie's Dad
 Ralphie in his ndoto
Ralphie in his fantasy
added by NocturnalMirage
Source: EQD, joyreactor
added by NocturnalMirage
Source: EQD, joyreactor
added by tinkerbell66799
Source: Original Owners (NOT ME!!)
posted by Seanthehedgehog
The sky was starting to turn dark as upinde wa mvua Dash flew back to the house, where Applejack, and Rarity were waiting for her.

Pierce, and Harry returned. They brought zaidi guns, ammo, water, and food.

Applejack: *Nervously pacing the floor* This is taking forever. She should be back kwa now.
Harry: I don't know what to tell wewe A,J, but, I think your friend-
Rainbow Dash: *Opens the door* Has just returned.
Rarity: Rainbow!
Applejack: We were so worried about you!
Pierce: Are wewe okay?
Rainbow Dash: Fine, fine. I killed Flim, now we just need to kill Flam, and we're back in 2016.
Harry: What is...
continue reading...
Twilight: If somebody had told me when I was a blank flank that one siku I'd give a speech to a class at Celestia's School of Magic, I wouldn't have believed it, but.. I hope that I have been up to the task, because I can tell that all of wewe are and that the future of Equestrian magic is in good hooves.

Spike: (sarcastically) Wow, hehe. That was even better than the first eleven times.

Twilight: Eh, I don't know, Spike. I'd like to be able to get through the whole speech without looking at the cards.

Spike: Come on, Twilight! wewe can't be nervous about giving a speech to a bunch of magic students!...
continue reading...
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Date: July 2, 1961
Location: Cheyenne, Wyoming
Time: 3:00 PM
Railroad: Union Pacific

Pete: *Inside the station with everyone* Okay. There's thirteen of us. I will be the referee, and the rest of wewe must choose your teams. Pierce Hawkins, and Nocturnal Mirage are team captains.
Hawkeye: Okay. *Gets in front of everyone with Mirage* My first pick, Metal Gloss.
Metal Gloss: Yay. *Runs to Hawkeye, and kisses him*
Mirage: Why did I have the feeling wewe would choose her?
Hawkeye: Because she's my wife.
Mirage: Dan, you're on my team.
Dan: I am very pleased kwa this. *Walks to Mirage*
Hawkeye: Stylo,...
continue reading...
added by NocturnalMirage
Source: EQD, joyreactor
added by NocturnalMirage
Source: joyreactor, EQD
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Date: May 25, 1961
Location: Cheyenne, Wyoming
Time: 9:45 AM
Railroad: Union Pacific

Percy and Jeff returned to the yards in time to see Hawkeye arrive in a freight train with Stylo.

Hawkeye: *Stops inayofuata to Snowflake's tower*
Stylo: Well it looks like Percy and Jeff just got back from fixing track.
Hawkeye: Let's ask them how it went.
Stylo: I'll do that, wewe go uncouple these engines from the freight cars.
Hawkeye: I did that last time. wewe do it!
Jeff: *Uncouples the engines from the freight cars with his magic*
Hawkeye & Stylo: *Looking at Jeff*
Jeff: Neither of wewe wanted to do it,...
continue reading...
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Date: May 15, 1961
Location: Cheyenne, Wyoming
Time: 10:32 AM
Railroad: Union Pacific

Pete, and Hawkeye told their Marafiki about the auction. Hawkeye also told the other ponies that worked with him.

By the time it was time to go home, Hawkeye stopped in Pete's office.

Hawkeye: How many ponies did wewe get to jiunge the auction with us?
Pete: Seven.
Hawkeye: I talked to everyone else. Metal Gloss, Mirage, and Dan have a few items to put up for auction.
Pete: Okay. The auction takes place on the 17th. Remember, we need to make over ten thousand dollars.

And on the siku the auction took place, it was...
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posted by SomeoneButNoone
(Pilot)

WARRNING : I don't mean to offend anyone and everything is only for jokes. No harash feelings.



Welcome to Dan Rants - place filled with my opinion and useless banter!
There will be some offensive stuff and profanity in really small way.
It also include jokes about Canadians. Just kidding Canadians are great.
For first episode I chose something everyone met : community.

Because I dont really consider myself brony anymore doesn't mean I don't take part in community. Let's thru some of basic community members.

The German Brownies - Rare but seen - they upendo a guy with name Adolf and surname...
continue reading...
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Tim, and Julia interrogate the gppony, pony in the Ferrari they chased. When it was over, they spoke to Captain Jefferson in his office.

Captain Jefferson: So he's not part of the Low Riders.
Julia: No sir. He just zoomed past us over 100, and that's how the chase started.
Tim: He alisema he was heading to a business meeting, but when he saw us chasing him, he tried to lose us on the highway.
Julia: How long is he going to be arrested for?
Captain Jefferson: 8 years. Attempting to kill wewe two didn't bring him any justice.

The Low Riders met up across the mitaani, mtaa from the train station around 9 O' Clock....
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Sean and upinde wa mvua Dash stopped their cars outside of the barracks they were going to destroy.

Sean: *Using an MK46, and a Smith & Wesson 500*
Rainbow Dash: *Gets out a Striker Shotgun* Let's do this.
Sean: Okay. There's just one zaidi thing we need. *Opens the shina of his car, and grabs a backpack* Time bombs.
Rainbow Dash: wewe must have a lot in there.
Sean: Enough to destroy a building three times the size of this one. Let's go. *Walks towards the door. It's locked, so he breaks it down with his machine gun*

Song: link

Sean: *Goes in with upinde wa mvua Dash*
Nazis: *Coming from the right*
Rainbow...
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posted by Canada24
MEANWHILE:

Diamond: ONE VOTE!?.. Silver Spoon! wewe didn't vote for me?!

Silver Spoon: No, I didn't.

Diamond Tiara: But you're my best friend!

Silver Spoon: Am I? 'Cause I tried to help kwa mentioning your 'surprise' statue, and suddenly I wasn't even allowed to speak! wewe could have actually won this election if wewe just listened to me. wewe wanna know how? [whispering] Sorry. I'm not allowed to speak.

Diamond Tiera: (growls and storms off).

AppleBloom: Boy. She seems pretty upset.. We should check on her.

Scootaloo: We don't know that she's upset/. Not to a certainty. All we know for sure, is Diamond lost.

Diamond Tiera: (is heard screaming).

Sweetie Belle: What about now?

Scootaloo: Again, not enough evidence. For all we know, she's being murdered.

Sweetie Belle: (as if this ISN'T a reason a for concern) True enough.

AppleBloom: Yes.. But we should go anyway.
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Didont was standing inayofuata to his train. It was 9:15.

Nazi Pony: Engineer!! Start your engine!
Didont: *Climbs into his engine's cab*
German Ponies: *Covering up the artillery guns with tarps*
Didont: *Opens the regulator, and blows the whistle. The train starts moving*

There was wheel spin when the train left, but Didont poured some sand onto the tracks to give his engine zaidi traction.

The train was travelling at 30 miles an hour, and most of the surroundings were brick houses.

Meanwhile with the Colonel that we haven't seen since part 2, he was inaonyesha up to the yards where his train was getting...
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added by NocturnalMirage
Source: facebook, joyreactor, EQD
posted by Seanthehedgehog
punda punda Inn

Starring upinde wa mvua Dash as Marisa Sayers
Double Scoop as Lloyd
Saten Twist as Mercury
Pleiades as Joanna
Master Sword as George
Mortomis as Ranger
Blaze as Richard

At the punda punda Inn, everyone was sad. A gppony, pony was dead.

Lloyd: Mercury was a good boss, a good friend, and-
Mercury: I'm not the one that died.
Audience: *Laughing*
George: It was Donovan who was killed. He was doing a job, killing a gppony, pony for creating counterfeit money, when the police shot him to death from behind.
Marisa: He also had some jobs for me.
Ranger: Really?
Richard: What kind of jobs?
Marisa: Blowjobs.
Audience:...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Theme Song: link

Master Sword: Come on Tom, let's go meet the others.
Tom: Right behind you.
Double Scoop: *Standing on mitaani, mtaa corner*
Aina: *Runs out of her house*
Sunny: Hey, wait for me. *Flying in the middle of the street*
Saten Twist: *Polishing his chain saw, but stops to go meet the others*
Pleiades: *Arrives at corner*
Mortomis: *Standing inayofuata to Double Scoop*
Tom: zaidi ponies!!
Snow Wonder: *Arrives in a brand new Corvette*
Heartsong: *Climbs out of a manhole*
Annie: *Arrives on a bicycle*
Blaze: *Flies out of a house window, and lands inayofuata to Tom*
Sophie Shimmer: *Gets off of a slow...
continue reading...
added by NocturnalMirage
Source: joyreactor
added by NocturnalMirage
Source: facebook, joyreactor