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Source: Lots Of Jokes
posted by Bdavisbrookeme
Some self-evident truths about pets...

Buy a dog a toy and it will play with it forever. Buy a cat a present and it will play with the wrapper for 10 minutes.

Although Cats are rather delicate creatures, and they are subject to a good many ailments, I never heard of one who suffered from insomnia.

Dogs and Cats instinctively know the exact moment their owners will wake up. Then they wake them 10 dakika sooner.

Dog's have owners. Cat's have staff.

Dogs shed, Cats shred.

I wonder if other mbwa think poodles are members of a weird religious cult?

No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation...
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added by Bdavisbrookeme
Source: Lots Of Jokes
added by Bdavisbrookeme
Source: Lots Of Jokes
posted by Bdavisbrookeme
Answers to 5 of the toughest maswali women ask...

There are five things that women should never, ever ask a guy, according to an makala in an issue of Sassy magazine.

The five maswali are:

1 - "What are wewe thinking?"
2 - "Do wewe upendo me?"
3 - "Do I look fat?"
4 - "Do wewe think she is prettier than me?"
5 - "What would wewe do if I died?"

What makes these maswali so bad is that every one is guaranteed to explode into a major argument and/or divorce if the man does not answered properly, which is to say dishonestly. For example:



1 - "What are wewe thinking?" The proper answer to this question,...
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added by lucysmileyface
I'm bored and procrastinating packing for the millionth time in my life so i looked up everyone's birthday number and it gave some cool info!
ps. i didn't know everyones years so i checked their profiles assuming that's right.

also i'm so so so sorry if i missed wewe i didn't mean to!

oh and i thought these facts were almost exactly right. :]
-----------------------
January
Jenelle
~You Are a Guru
Spiritual and thoughtful, wewe tend to take a step back from the world.
You're very sensitive to what's going on around you, yet wewe remain calm.
Although wewe are brilliant, it may take wewe a while to...
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CHAPTER THREE!
You’re a part of my entity, here for infinity!


G: Whaaat did shee saaaaay (8)
S: AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!
G: RAT????????
S:YES! YOU!
G: What?
S: This song again? Are wewe trying to kill me?
G: Oh my God. I forgot it’s on the black list.
S: Remind me to get wewe a memory someday.
G: Whatever. wewe know wewe upendo my voice.
S: Who told wewe that again?
G: You. Remember when you…
S: …when I was drunk!
G: WHORE!
S: SLUT!
Tool: What is going on?
S&G: WHAT?
Tool: Why are wewe two arguing?
S: We’re not.
Tool: The whole block has heard you.
G: Did wewe hear anything? *looking at S*
S: Nope. And...
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