Kowalski's Guide to Sciency Things
Hi there. I'm Kowalski. The penguin, auk brainiac, some will say. And sense wewe are kusoma this, the cause must be either wewe want to learn how to do things zaidi sciency, au wewe are bored out of your mind and this is the only thing wewe can find to read.
Either way, wewe are kusoma it, so keep on doing it. Now I am not a reader, so I don't know how long introductions should be. I'll just stop here.
Happy reading!
Sciency lesson #1, How to make it seem like you're smart
If wewe want to be smart, wewe have to make it seem like wewe are. One of the things I do is talk smartly. Below is a orodha with some phrases and how to make them sound smart.
How the orodha works:
The phrase.
The smart way to say it.
au ways.
I am stuffed/full.
My stomach is digesting too much at the same time.
I have to go to the bathroom.
My bladder is going to explode!
I have to do a magic trick into the toilet.
That line is long!
That line is as long as Jupiter!
This line is moving fast!
If this line was moving any faster than I bet we could go back in time!
PoM is my inayopendelewa show.
PoM is my inayopendelewa onyesha in the universe! And the universe is very, very, big, and is expanding right this very second! In fact, it has been since the Big Bang! The Big Bang, that reminds me of that science book I like to read. The science book also reminds me of PoM, which is my inayopendelewa onyesha of all time. I remember the exact time and tarehe I watched the first episode. It was awesome! Did wewe know that…
I like fish.
samaki is my inayopendelewa chakula of all time! It is really good brain food, with much nutrients, though the fishy smell. Did wewe also know that over 1000 species of known samaki exist! The plural of samaki is also fish, but sometimes...
Sciency lesson #2, Good grammar
Another good way to make it seem wewe are smart is to correct others. It will also sometimes make them feel dumb, without the occasional quarter in the show-off jar (don't ask me for any money! I'm broke).
Here is how the orodha works:
Commonly incorrect thing.
How to correct it in a smart way.
A honor.
No, no. It's an honor. Just because there is a consonant there, it doesn't mean not to use an. The h is simply silent in the grammar, though not in sound, like French.
(any sort of baby talk)
Stop using w instead of other consonants! It is really annoying and babyish. *mumble* Like a two mwaka old. :^|
(common short phrases used to save time, ex. Goin' Fishin')
Don't be scared to use your Gs! Geez...
(using me instead of I)
We're not cavemen, already! In fact, cavemen didn't even have a civilized language, so wewe are technically talking jibberish as well!
(jibberish)
Excuse me, but USE PROPER GRAMMAR! THIS IS GETTING REALLY ANNOYING!
And that is all for my list, and lesson. Thanks for reading! :^)
Kowalski out! 😄
maoni if wewe would like me to try and do another one. ;^)
Hi there. I'm Kowalski. The penguin, auk brainiac, some will say. And sense wewe are kusoma this, the cause must be either wewe want to learn how to do things zaidi sciency, au wewe are bored out of your mind and this is the only thing wewe can find to read.
Either way, wewe are kusoma it, so keep on doing it. Now I am not a reader, so I don't know how long introductions should be. I'll just stop here.
Happy reading!
Sciency lesson #1, How to make it seem like you're smart
If wewe want to be smart, wewe have to make it seem like wewe are. One of the things I do is talk smartly. Below is a orodha with some phrases and how to make them sound smart.
How the orodha works:
The phrase.
The smart way to say it.
au ways.
I am stuffed/full.
My stomach is digesting too much at the same time.
I have to go to the bathroom.
My bladder is going to explode!
I have to do a magic trick into the toilet.
That line is long!
That line is as long as Jupiter!
This line is moving fast!
If this line was moving any faster than I bet we could go back in time!
PoM is my inayopendelewa show.
PoM is my inayopendelewa onyesha in the universe! And the universe is very, very, big, and is expanding right this very second! In fact, it has been since the Big Bang! The Big Bang, that reminds me of that science book I like to read. The science book also reminds me of PoM, which is my inayopendelewa onyesha of all time. I remember the exact time and tarehe I watched the first episode. It was awesome! Did wewe know that…
I like fish.
samaki is my inayopendelewa chakula of all time! It is really good brain food, with much nutrients, though the fishy smell. Did wewe also know that over 1000 species of known samaki exist! The plural of samaki is also fish, but sometimes...
Sciency lesson #2, Good grammar
Another good way to make it seem wewe are smart is to correct others. It will also sometimes make them feel dumb, without the occasional quarter in the show-off jar (don't ask me for any money! I'm broke).
Here is how the orodha works:
Commonly incorrect thing.
How to correct it in a smart way.
A honor.
No, no. It's an honor. Just because there is a consonant there, it doesn't mean not to use an. The h is simply silent in the grammar, though not in sound, like French.
(any sort of baby talk)
Stop using w instead of other consonants! It is really annoying and babyish. *mumble* Like a two mwaka old. :^|
(common short phrases used to save time, ex. Goin' Fishin')
Don't be scared to use your Gs! Geez...
(using me instead of I)
We're not cavemen, already! In fact, cavemen didn't even have a civilized language, so wewe are technically talking jibberish as well!
(jibberish)
Excuse me, but USE PROPER GRAMMAR! THIS IS GETTING REALLY ANNOYING!
And that is all for my list, and lesson. Thanks for reading! :^)
Kowalski out! 😄
maoni if wewe would like me to try and do another one. ;^)
