"Boner, catch this disk." "Boner, quit humping the neighbors leg." "Boner, stop peeing on the lawn."
This way when wewe loose your dog wewe can yell "Boner!" without looking peverted.
Also, if the dog runs away a lot and it is female, wewe can name it Virginity. When asking people if they have seen your dog wewe can say, "I Lost my virginity and I can't find it."