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just got this while browsing the net

1.I was kidnapped kwa terrorists and they only just let me go, so I didn't have time to do it.

2.I didn't do it because I didn't want to add to my teacher's heavy workload.

3.A bunch of nerds aliiba it to make sure theirs were completely perfect.

4.We ran out of toilet paper at my house last night, and my Dad isn't feeling so good. He grabbed it in a big rush and I haven't seen it since.

5.My mother took it to have it framed.

6.It was in my back pocket and a pickpocket aliiba it.

7.I let somebody copy it but they never gave it back.

8.My mom's whooping cough vaccination wore off and we had to go to the hospital.

9.My skimpy printer ran out of ink.

10.I wasn't able to do my homework this weekend because when I went ice fishing, the heater inside of the tent got too close to the ukuta of the tent, starting it on fire. And when I ran out of there, I realized that my cat was still in there. My cat was in there because all the small samaki that I catch, I just give to my cat. But when I went back for my cat, the moto was too hot. So I spent the weekend morning the loss of my cat.

11."You alisema do maswali 1-10. wewe didn't say bring them in."

12.My youngest daughter couldn't turn in her homework because her younger step-brother had stolen it, filled it in and turned it in to his teacher to prove how smart he was.

13.My house is being fumigated and I don't want to go in there and suffocate just to get it.

14.I left it in my shati and my mother put the shati in the wash.

15.I didn't do it because I spent all night doing the awali night's homework.

16.My Dad accidentally put it in his briefcase, mkoba and took it to work.

17.My flash drive exploded.

18.The cleaning lady threw it away.

19.I felt like doing the whole book on the bus ride home, so I did -- but after the first 116 pages, I got bus-sick and puked all over the workbook and all my homework! What a coincidence, eh? So I started an extra credit ripoti about World War I & II in my car going back nyumbani after chajio, chakula cha jioni and, lo and behold!, my clumsy little siblings all felt carsick and hurled all over it and the World War maktaba book (that'll explain the School maktaba fine). And it was already too late to start another one, so my mom wrote me a note excusing me for not bringing in my homework. I was looking at it on the bus when Billy (or whoever), who was sitting inayofuata to me, felt really sick and guess what happened?

20.I put it in the safe, but Lost the combination.

21.My child’s locker is jammed and she can't get her homework out of it.

22.Some aliens from outer space borrowed it so they could study how the human brain worked.

23.Had to bail mom out of jail again.

24.A sudden wind blew it out of my hand and I never saw it again.

25.I have the mathematical proof, but there isn't room to write it in the margin.

26.The lights in our house went out, and I had to burn it to get enough light to see the fuse box.

27.I was in the lunch room and another student started criticizing wewe and I just couldn't let that go without letting him know he was wrong. I searched through my backpack to find something to throw at him, and all I could find was today's homework assignment, so I let him have it.

28.I thought the assignment was uninspiring. I read Moby Dick instead.

29.I got soap in my eyes and was blinded for the rest of the night.

30.Please excuse Jackie for not having her homework she was a little under the weatherman, and there was a big flurry in Central America.

31.I have a solar powered calculator and it was cloudy.It wasn't challenging enough.

32.Our dog has mistaken Reid’s homework for that GOSH DAMN newspaper.

33.I didn't do it, because I didn't want the other kids in the class to look bad.

34.I gave it to a homeless man to line his hat with.

35.My daughter couldn't turn in her homework because her dad had used it to start a moto in the wood stove.

36.A man came into my house last night and threatened to commit suicide. Well, it turns out he had a split-personality, so it was considered a hostage situation. It was a big commotion. Police, ambulance, everything! I can't believe wewe didn't hear about it! That's why I couldn't get my homework done.

37.A mad circus clown aliiba it on my bus stop and tried luring me into his house with it.

38.Aliens from outer space abducted my homework. They threatened me and alisema that if I didn’t give them my homework that I would be terminated.

39."Sharon didn't do her homework because of her eyes.....She couldn't see any reason to do it."

40.My internet access was down (for emailed assignments).

41.I did my homework in my head, I didn’t know I was supposed to write it down. Then I forgot. inayofuata time should I onyesha my work?

42.I left it at Mom's house when she took me back to Dad's house.

43.I did do it all, but before I got a chance to save, my book crashed and I Lost it all.

44.I loaned it to a friend, but he moved away.

45.I left it in my locker with last week's assignment.

46."I left it on your dawati last Friday but its just not here and it was handwritten so I can't print it off again, took me ages!"

47.I left it in a hymn book in the choir loft, having used it to mark my solo.

48.I gave it to the substitute.

49.My printer broke and my disk is corrupted. Unfortunately my computer crashed this morning as well.

50.I left my homework on my dawati at home. My dog got ahold of it and slobbered all over it. I didn’t want to bring it in with all those dog germs.

51.I dropped it in the toilet accidentally and it got flushed.

52.I have radon poisoning.

53.My notebook got stolen in the school cafeteria and it had all my work in it.

54.There's a virus in my printer.

55."Joe don't have his homework because our family just got a new paper shredder, and I just had to test it out, and I accidentally shredded Joe’s homework."

56.My father had a nervous breakdown and he cut it up to make paper dolls.

57.Another student fell in a lake, and I jumped in to rescue him but unfortunately my homework drowned.

58.We had no chakula in the house. I can’t do homework on an empty stomach. Can you?

59.I left it in the back of the truck when we went deer hunting. One of the textbook's word problems offended me. I'm not supporting them kwa doing any zaidi of their problems.

60.Please excuse my son for doing so poorly on the test. The saa he puts aside to do homework and studying every week was Lost when the clocks "sprung forward" over the weekend.

61.I was at a rally last night.
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Source: RaNdOm, random, picture, funny, cute, beauty, animals, art
I KNEW wewe WERE IN TROUBLE kwa Taylor Swift

{I Knew wewe Were Trouble}

Once upon a time, a few mistakes ago
I was in your sights, wewe got me alone
You found me, wewe found me, wewe found me…
I guess wewe didn't care and I guess I liked that
And when I fell hard, wewe took a step back
Without me, without me, without me…
And he's long gone when he's inayofuata to me
And I realize the blame is on me.

CHORUS
Cause I knew wewe were trouble when wewe walked in
So shame on me now
I flew me to places I’d never been
so wewe put me down oh,
I knew wewe were trouble when wewe walked in
So shame on me now
I flew me to places I’d...
continue reading...
posted by nmdis
ROAR
I used to bite my tongue and hold my breath
Scared to rock the mashua and make a mess
So I sit quietly, agreed politely
I guess that I forgot I had a choice
I let wewe push me past the breaking point
I stood for nothing, so I fell for everything

You held me down, but I got up
Already brushing off the dust
You hear my voice, your hear that sound
Like thunder, gonna shake the ground
You held me down, but I got up
Get ready cause I’ve had enough
I see it all, I see it now

Chorus:
I got the eye of the tiger, a fighter, dancing through the moto
Cause I am a champion and you’re gonna hear me...
continue reading...
posted by nmdis
SLOW DOWN

Now that I have captured your attention
I want to steal wewe for a rhythm intervention
Mr. T, wewe say I'm ready for inspection
Show me how wewe make a first impression

Oh, oh
Can we take it nice and slow, slow
Break it down and drop it low, low
Cause I just wanna party all night in the neon lights 'til wewe can't let me go

I just wanna feel your body right inayofuata to mine
All night long
Baby, slow down the song
And when it's coming closer to the end hit rewind
All night long
Baby, slow down the song

If wewe want me I'm accepting applications
So long as we keep this record on rotation
You know I'm good...
continue reading...
posted by animelol
Mary asks everyone to guess her age. Thanks to the amazing effects of two safe, at-home anti-aging creams, her skin defies time, looking 20 years younger than it once did.

As a mom to two children in Hightstown, New Jersey, Mary leads the typical average American lifestyle. After working hard to provide for her family in this struggling economy, Mary can't afford to throw money at the newest beauty products, hoping they will work when all others have not lived up to their hype. Unhappy with the wrinkles and age spots on her face, not to mention the sagging skin on her neck, Mary strived to find...
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Ooooohhh
Ooh, yeah
You, wewe got a nasty reputation
We're in a sticky situation, it's down to me and you
So tell me, is it true, they say there ain't nobody better
Well now that we're together
Show me what wewe can do

You're under the gun
Out on the run
Gonna set the night on fire
Out on the run
Under the gun
Playin' to win

Raise your hands
When wewe want to let it go
Raise your hands
And wewe want to let a feeling show
Raise your hands
New York to Chicago
Raise your hands
From New Jersey to Tokyo
Whoa-whoa
Raise your hands

I, I've been out on the front line
Where you'll go down if wewe waste time
They'll walk all over...
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Once upon a time
Not so long ago
Tommy used to work on the docks
Union's been on strike, he's down on his luck
It's tough, so tough

Gina works the diner all day
Working for her man, she brings nyumbani her pay
For love, mmm, for love

She says we got to hold on to what we've got
It doesn't make a difference if we make it au not
We got each other and that's a lot
For upendo we'll give it a shot

Oh we're half way there
Whoa-oh livin' on a prayer
Take my hand, we'll make it I swear
Whoa-oh, livin' on a prayer

Tommy's got his six string in hock
Now he's holding in when he used to make it talk
So tough, mmm, it's tough

Gina...
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Whoa
Whoa
Whoa
Whoa

The weekend comes to this town
Seven days too soon
For the ones who have to make up
What we break up of their rules

Well I saw Captain Kidd on Sunset
Tell his boys they're in command
While chino danced a tango
With a broomstick in his hand
He said, it's alright (Alright) if wewe have a good time
It's alright (alright) if wewe want to kuvuka, msalaba that line
Break on through to the other side

Let it rock (Let it rock), let it go (Let it go)
You can't stop a moto burning out of control
Let it rock (Let it rock), let it go (Let it go)
With the night we’re on the loose, huh
Got to let it rock
Whoa
Whoa

We...
continue reading...