Congratulations. You’ve worked up the nerve to ask the girl out and she alisema yes. You’ve convinced her you’re worth a shot. It is the night of your first tarehe and you’re terrified of messing up. You’re not sure how to impress the girl. Well, thankfully you’ve found this guide, written kwa me, a girl.
Step one: Before
•Clean up before hand, no one wants a guy with greasy hair and an unappealing smell
•Don’t put on too much cologne. A little bit is fine but a lot quickly becomes repulsive. A tip: any amount of “Ax” is too much
•Come up with some ideas for conversations to smooth through awkward silences
•Have some ideas on where to go and what to do, it will make wewe seem zaidi on juu of the situation, but don’t decide of a place, she may not like it.
•Always, always, always have a jacket
Step two: During
•Show up no later than ten dakika late, and never be early. If wewe told her eight, she plans on having until eight to get ready, and if you’re late it will seem like wewe don’t care
•Compliment her! She spent a while getting ready and she wants to know it was worth it. Make it something from the heart, not “You look so sexy/hot”
•It never hurts to open up the car door.
•Say wewe thought you’d go to _______. Choose a place with a wide verity of food, so she can find something she likes
•Expensive is not always better, she will feel guilty if wewe drop a lot of money
*Don't make it a quiz, with a bunch of maswali starting with what, how why, ect. Start a real conversationg, wit ha few maswali sprinkled in. YOu will get to know her overtime
•Avoid pick up lines, though the fake-yawn to put your arm around us is tolerated, lines like “did it hurt when wewe fell from heaven” are not
•If it’s cold, the koti, jacket wewe brought is around her shoulders. It’s a sweet gesture that will always give wewe heshima for the future
•Avoid talk about any “ex” she may feel used, au like a trophy. Both are undesirable
Step three: After
•If you’re planning to kiss her good bye au say something sweat, do so in the car. Her father is most likely waiting for a way to embarrass wewe and anything zaidi moderate than a hand-shake will not be acceptable
•Make it clear wewe had a good time but don’t offer a sekunde tarehe unless wewe are sure she wants one too.
•Don’t kiss unless the mood is right, but make it memorable
•Walk her to the door
•After walking back to your car, take one last look at her house and smile. She’ll be watching and will most likely smile back.
Step four: The future
•Don’t treat her as a trophy, talk to her, be with her, but don’t parade her around
•Kissing/hugging in front of your Marafiki means a lot, but in front of hers could be risky, like everything, test the waters before making big moves
•Stand up for her, ask her for advice, and make sure she never doubts how wewe feel
•If wewe cheat on her, wewe sure as hell will get your punda kicked, kwa both her, her friends, and the one wewe cheated with. She will find out eventually
•If wewe lie to her, wewe sure as hell will get your punda kicked
•Doing something sweet and romantic will almost always make up for forgotten birthdays/anniversaries
•Sometimes, she just needs a shoulder to cry on
Remember, wewe may think the work is done after the first date, but really the war has just begun. Girls are not some trophy to be won, sat on a shelf, and admired. wewe have to work to keep her. Do sappy romantic things, carry her books, and open her doors. Never lose sight that every time a girl says yes to a date, it is the best thing that ever happened to you.
Step one: Before
•Clean up before hand, no one wants a guy with greasy hair and an unappealing smell
•Don’t put on too much cologne. A little bit is fine but a lot quickly becomes repulsive. A tip: any amount of “Ax” is too much
•Come up with some ideas for conversations to smooth through awkward silences
•Have some ideas on where to go and what to do, it will make wewe seem zaidi on juu of the situation, but don’t decide of a place, she may not like it.
•Always, always, always have a jacket
Step two: During
•Show up no later than ten dakika late, and never be early. If wewe told her eight, she plans on having until eight to get ready, and if you’re late it will seem like wewe don’t care
•Compliment her! She spent a while getting ready and she wants to know it was worth it. Make it something from the heart, not “You look so sexy/hot”
•It never hurts to open up the car door.
•Say wewe thought you’d go to _______. Choose a place with a wide verity of food, so she can find something she likes
•Expensive is not always better, she will feel guilty if wewe drop a lot of money
*Don't make it a quiz, with a bunch of maswali starting with what, how why, ect. Start a real conversationg, wit ha few maswali sprinkled in. YOu will get to know her overtime
•Avoid pick up lines, though the fake-yawn to put your arm around us is tolerated, lines like “did it hurt when wewe fell from heaven” are not
•If it’s cold, the koti, jacket wewe brought is around her shoulders. It’s a sweet gesture that will always give wewe heshima for the future
•Avoid talk about any “ex” she may feel used, au like a trophy. Both are undesirable
Step three: After
•If you’re planning to kiss her good bye au say something sweat, do so in the car. Her father is most likely waiting for a way to embarrass wewe and anything zaidi moderate than a hand-shake will not be acceptable
•Make it clear wewe had a good time but don’t offer a sekunde tarehe unless wewe are sure she wants one too.
•Don’t kiss unless the mood is right, but make it memorable
•Walk her to the door
•After walking back to your car, take one last look at her house and smile. She’ll be watching and will most likely smile back.
Step four: The future
•Don’t treat her as a trophy, talk to her, be with her, but don’t parade her around
•Kissing/hugging in front of your Marafiki means a lot, but in front of hers could be risky, like everything, test the waters before making big moves
•Stand up for her, ask her for advice, and make sure she never doubts how wewe feel
•If wewe cheat on her, wewe sure as hell will get your punda kicked, kwa both her, her friends, and the one wewe cheated with. She will find out eventually
•If wewe lie to her, wewe sure as hell will get your punda kicked
•Doing something sweet and romantic will almost always make up for forgotten birthdays/anniversaries
•Sometimes, she just needs a shoulder to cry on
Remember, wewe may think the work is done after the first date, but really the war has just begun. Girls are not some trophy to be won, sat on a shelf, and admired. wewe have to work to keep her. Do sappy romantic things, carry her books, and open her doors. Never lose sight that every time a girl says yes to a date, it is the best thing that ever happened to you.
After that...
S:Lets watch a scary movie!!!
Everyone:YEAH!
S:(Flips channels)Here...
95 dakika later
C:My...God.(Pants)
P:(Falls over)
N:HELP ME JESUS!!
S:You guys never seen this one?I've seen it a hundred times!
C:My FLIPPING EYES!!!!!!!!!!!!
Then a sound came
???:(Foot steps)
S:ETHAN!!!SHUT UP!
E:What?
C:That wasn't you?
E:That wasn't me what?
Everyone:HOLY CRAP!!!!!!!!!!!
E:WHAT!!!????
S:That sound!
E:I didn't hear anything.
N:Maybe it was just our imagination
Everyone:Yeah...
Then that sound came again,No body did anything.
The sound came again...Louder.
P:NOT OUR IMAGINATION!!!
Screams rose from that room
E:SHUT UP!!!
They we're all frightened.They called the police...the line died after they alisema ten words.
S:Lets watch a scary movie!!!
Everyone:YEAH!
S:(Flips channels)Here...
95 dakika later
C:My...God.(Pants)
P:(Falls over)
N:HELP ME JESUS!!
S:You guys never seen this one?I've seen it a hundred times!
C:My FLIPPING EYES!!!!!!!!!!!!
Then a sound came
???:(Foot steps)
S:ETHAN!!!SHUT UP!
E:What?
C:That wasn't you?
E:That wasn't me what?
Everyone:HOLY CRAP!!!!!!!!!!!
E:WHAT!!!????
S:That sound!
E:I didn't hear anything.
N:Maybe it was just our imagination
Everyone:Yeah...
Then that sound came again,No body did anything.
The sound came again...Louder.
P:NOT OUR IMAGINATION!!!
Screams rose from that room
E:SHUT UP!!!
They we're all frightened.They called the police...the line died after they alisema ten words.
Holy Pooping Skeletons! Guys, I don't know how I survived, but I did, and now I am here to tell wewe guys about my encounter with the Slander Mawn.
It all started when me and my friends..Okay I don't have friends..Well me and my..Myself were Trick au Treating in Halloween. "Awesome! I hope I get Candeh!" I said. "Me too!" alisema myself. I was dressed as a tembo and myself was dressed as nothing. "Hey myself, I dare I can go into that scary Forest that most likely contains mtu-bweha and Sparkly Wanyonya damu with underage girls!" I said. "Lololo -- wewe just dared yourself!" alisema myself. "I accept!" alisema yourself. Yourself, myself and I entered the Forest and walked and stuff and it was dark and scary.
"Maybe I should head back.." alisema myself.
"And lose the dare? NO WAY!" alisema yourself.
"Um, guys I think I saw something!" I said.
Then a tall guy came and we died so much than we went to Heaven and came back as Ghosts.
SPREAD THE WURD! :D
It all started when me and my friends..Okay I don't have friends..Well me and my..Myself were Trick au Treating in Halloween. "Awesome! I hope I get Candeh!" I said. "Me too!" alisema myself. I was dressed as a tembo and myself was dressed as nothing. "Hey myself, I dare I can go into that scary Forest that most likely contains mtu-bweha and Sparkly Wanyonya damu with underage girls!" I said. "Lololo -- wewe just dared yourself!" alisema myself. "I accept!" alisema yourself. Yourself, myself and I entered the Forest and walked and stuff and it was dark and scary.
"Maybe I should head back.." alisema myself.
"And lose the dare? NO WAY!" alisema yourself.
"Um, guys I think I saw something!" I said.
Then a tall guy came and we died so much than we went to Heaven and came back as Ghosts.
SPREAD THE WURD! :D
If wewe want to know how to get stronger nails, then pay attention to these useful tips. They work!
File your nails: Every week wewe need to file wewe nails. Why? Because when wewe file your nails your body receives the message that it is time to regenerate your nails again. When this happens, the nail comes through stronger and in this way, will last longer.
Don't use too much polish: At least a couple of days a week go without polish and give your nails time to breathe.
Don't paint straight on the nail: Before painting your nails, use one kanzu, koti of clear nail protecter first. This will help strengthen your nails and give them needed nutrients.
Oil: Use almond, baby au mizeituni, mzeituni oil on your nails after wewe have removed polish. You'll see how healthy this makes your nails!
Three nurses all decided to play a joke on the doctor they worked for. Later in the day, they all got together on break and discussed what they had done to the doctor. The first nurse said, "I put cotton in his stethoscope so he couldn't hear. The sekunde nurse said, "Well, I did worse than that. I poked holes in all his condoms. The third nurse fainted.***************
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weirdness from inside my mind
================================================
its nice to see the rIsing sun
its nice to stay up Late
i like the sound of a hOover
i dont like the word Vegan
nobody likes my fEet
i like red except when itS blood on My sheet
this world is so rAndom
but i Like it that way
Lemons are sour
your Brain is sO frazzled
nOBody alisema it Would be easy
I am noT a Hairy monster
Bann the bomb
I like that saying
i like Goats
Not as much as frogs
sInging is good
i think: Praying is worthless
panda are cute
Legs are funny
mEn think im weird
So do women.
================================================
its nice to see the rIsing sun
its nice to stay up Late
i like the sound of a hOover
i dont like the word Vegan
nobody likes my fEet
i like red except when itS blood on My sheet
this world is so rAndom
but i Like it that way
Lemons are sour
your Brain is sO frazzled
nOBody alisema it Would be easy
I am noT a Hairy monster
Bann the bomb
I like that saying
i like Goats
Not as much as frogs
sInging is good
i think: Praying is worthless
panda are cute
Legs are funny
mEn think im weird
So do women.
One day, two american tourists were driving through Nova Scotia, argueing about the name of the town. Finally, assuming neither of them were right, they decided to stop and have something to eat for lunch. When they got into the restraunt, the waitress asked them if they were ready to order. Yeah, but first could wewe pronounce the name of where we are,veeerryyy slllooowwwlllyy? alisema the wife, smiling. Of course, the waitress said, noticing the two were american.
Tiiiiiimmmmmm Hooooorrrrrttttoooonnnnsss.
Hope that made wewe laugh.
Here are 2 bila mpangilio facts:
They don't sell Smarties au Shreddies in America.
They dont have Walmart in America.
Tiiiiiimmmmmm Hooooorrrrrttttoooonnnnsss.
Hope that made wewe laugh.
Here are 2 bila mpangilio facts:
They don't sell Smarties au Shreddies in America.
They dont have Walmart in America.