Hello, my name is Basmati Kasaar. I am suffering from rare and deadly diseases, poor scores on final exams, extreme virginity, fear of being kidnapped and executed kwa anal electrocution, and guilt for not forwarding out 50 billion fucking chain letters sent to me kwa people who actually believe that if wewe send them on, then that poor 6 mwaka old girl in Arkansas with a breast on her forehead will be able to raise enough money to have it removed before her redneck parents sell her off to the traveling freak show. Do wewe honestly believe that Bill Gates is going to give wewe and everyone wewe send "his" barua pepe to $1000? How stupid are you?

Ooooh, lookyhere! If I scroll down this page and make a wish, I'll get laid kwa every Playboy model in the magazine! What a bunch of bullshit.

So basically, this message is a big FUCK wewe to all the people out there who have nothing better to do than to send me stupid chain mail forwards. Maybe the evil chain letter leprechauns will come into my apartment and sodomize me in my sleep for not continuing the chain which was started kwa Jesus in 5 A.D. and was brought to this country kwa midget pilgrims on the Mayflower and if it makes it to the mwaka 2000, it'll be in the guinness Book of World Records for longest continuous streak of blatant stupidity.

Fuck them.

If you're going to mbele something, at least send me something mildly amusing. I've seen all the "send this to 50 of your closest friends, and this poor, wretched excuse for a human being will somehow receive a nickel from some omniscient being" forwards about 90 times. I don't fucking care.

onyesha a little intelligence and think about what you're actually contributing to kwa sending out forwards. Chances are it's your own unpopularity.

The point being? If wewe get some chain letter that's threatening to leave wewe shagless au luckless for the rest of your life, futa it. If it's funny, send it on. Don't piss people off kwa making them feel guilty about a leper in Botswana with no teeth, who's been tied to a dead tembo for 27 years, whose only savior is the 5 cents per letter he'll receive if wewe mbele this mail, otherwise you'll end up like Miranda. Right? Now mbele this to everyone wewe know otherwise, tomorrow morning your underwear will turn carnivorous and will consume your genitals.