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posted by XxLalasaysxX
Here are my orodha of corny jokes. Now i'm just gonna let wewe know now i got alot of these from the Youtube channel, vlogbrothers. So check them out too. Prepare to laugh.
(Make sure your not drinking anything au eating anything wewe might spit it au something.)

#1 How did the hipster burn his tongue?
He drank coffee before it was cool.

#2 Why are celsius and farenheit friends?
Because they're fair-in-height. (I came up with that one :)

#3 Why was the ufagio late to work?
It overswept!

#4 Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the bay they'd be bagels.

#5 What's Michelle Obama's inayopendelewa vegetable?
Barackoli (broccoli)

#6 Why does the uyoga have so many friends?
Because he's a fungi! (Fun guy)

#7 What do wewe call a fake noodle?
An impasta! (Imposter)

#8 How often do i make chemistry jokes?
Periodically.

#9 What do wewe call a pencil without lead?
Pointless!

#10 How do wewe make an octopus giggle ten times?
wewe give him ten-tickles (tenticles)

#11 How do wewe make lady gaga cry?
Poker face!

#12 What did Beethoven become when he died?
A decomposer!

#13 What's a chicken's inayopendelewa composer?
Bach!

#14 What did one eye say to the other eye?
"Between wewe and me man, something smells." (Your nose)

#15 What did the stamp say to the envelope?
"Stick with me man, we'll go places."

#16 What did the hat say to the hatrack?
"Stay here, I'll go on a-head."

#17 Why can't wewe hear a pteradactyl use the bathroom?
Because the "p" is silent (the letter p in the name is silent)

#18 Why did the little boy eat his homework?
The teacher alisema it was a piece of cake.

#19 Why did the nyanya blush?
It saw the saladi dressing.

#20 What did the dog say when he sat on sandpaper?
"Ruff!" (Rough)

#21 Why did the man send his phone to school?
He wanted a smartphone (i came up with that one too :)

#22 How do crazy people go through a forest?
They take the psycho path.

#23 How do wewe know if it's raining Cats and dogs?
wewe step in a poodle (puddle)

#24 How do wewe know if a clock is wise?
It goes clockwise (i thought of that)

#25 How do wewe get Pikachu on a bus?
wewe Pokémon (pok 'em on)

#26 Why can't wewe dress with Pikachu in the room?
He'll Pikachu (peek at you)

#27 What do wewe call cheese that isn't yours?
Nacho cheese (so old right?)

#28 How do get holy water?
wewe boil the hell out of it!

#29 What starts with "E" ends with "E" but only has one letter in it?
An envelope, duh xD

#30 Why didn't the skeleton kuvuka, msalaba the road?
He didn't have the guts to.

#31 What did the ghost say to scare the bees?
"BOOOOBEEES!" XD (please don't yell that if your parents are home)

#32 What does an angry pepper do?
It gets jalepeño face! (All up in yo face)

#33 What do wewe call an alligator in a vest?
An in- vest-igator investigator

#34 What's pink and fluffy?
pink fluff
#34.5 what's blue and fluffy? (Think about it)
pink fluff holding it's breath.

#35 What happens when wewe drink 7 coca colas?
wewe burp 7up

#36 Why can't your nose ever be 12 inches long?
Because then it'd be a foot.

#37 why does snoop dog carry an umbrella?
Fo' drizzle!

#38 Why was the police man in bed?
He was undercover.

#39 what did one light bulb say to another light bulb?
"Watts up?" (You know li,e the watts that are in a light bulb?)

#40 what did the samaki say when he hit a concrete wall?
"Dam!"
LAST ONE!

#41 Why can't wewe trust lions?
They be lion to you! (Lying)

Alright so those are my corny jokes. Hope wewe liked them. Make sure wewe check out vlogbrothers they're really cool. Ciao! And rememeber...
 PewDiePie
PewDiePie
Jetzt geht's los Freunde
Hier ist Markus Becker und die Mallorca Cowboys und das rote Pferd

Wir singen zusammen
Da hat das rote Pferd sich einfach umgekehrt
und hat mit seinem Schwanz die Fliege abgewehrt
Die Fliege war nicht dumm,
sie machte summ,summ,summ
Und flog mit viel Gebrumm
um's rote Pferd herum

lalalalalala lalalalalala lalalalalalalalalalalala
lalalalalala lalalalalala lalalalalalalalalalalala

Ok Freunde,
das war nicht schlecht für pango Anfang
Aber da geht noch was
Seit ihr gut drauf? Jaaa
Habt ihr lust zu feiern? Jaaa
Dann macht euch bereit und singt mit uns zusammen


Die Fliege...
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Hello I'm NOT the nostalgia critic, I remembered it so wewe don't have to. I've been watching NC's biggest dumba** in distress video and I thought I'd do one. Except for me it's only going to be characters that are animated and it's not only going to be female characters, there are some male characters here too. With other characters I can find at least some aspect of heroics in them except for these characters. Please keep in mind that this is just my opinion and I don't hate all of these characters. Please comments, enjoy.

10.Esmeralda(The Hunchback of Notre Dame)

I promise I'm not being...
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added by fatoshleo
posted by tokidoki123
[Everybody Loves Raymond] 116 - Diamonds #385
Marie: Oh I used to upendo Valentines Day!... then I met your father.
Frank: I used to upendo every day.
Contributed kwa funnytvquotes.com



[Everybody Loves Raymond] 121 - Fascinating Debra #409
Debra: There's nothing funny about me to imitate y'know?
Ray: Oh, what are wewe talking about? Here I'll do you. "Ray, get off of me, it's not your birthday"
Contributed kwa funnytvquotes.com



[Everybody Loves Raymond] 202 - Father Knows Least #380
Ray: Look, wewe have to do what Mommy says.
Ally: Why?
Ray: 'Cause I do.
Contributed kwa funnytvquotes.com



[Everybody Loves Raymond]...
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"Sometimes wewe wanna give up cause wewe dont think that wewe can make it. But in the end you'll be ok. Things will come and go.

You have to hang tight, hold on, be strong, songesha on, and keep your chin up. Cause tomorrow you'll deside on another way.

When everything inside wewe hurts, wewe just cant believe how it always comes back so much wrose. Just when wewe think wewe had all wewe can take, just stick up your head and know that wewe will always have a better day.

Somedays it can be hard and feels like the world is spining. Its never easy but we have rough times to try and build up our character not...
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FAKE FRIENDS: Never ask for chakula
REAL FRIENDS: Are the reason wewe have no food.

FAKE FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr/Mrs.
REAL FRIENDS: Call your parents kwa their first names.

FAKE FRIENDS: Bail wewe out of jail and tell wewe what wewe did was wrong.
REAL FRIENDS: Would be sittin inayofuata to wewe sayin "Dang...... that was fun!"

FAKE FRIENDS: Have never seen wewe cry.
REAL FRIENDS: Cry with you.

FAKE FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back.
REAL FRIENDS: Keep your stuff so long they forget its yours.

FAKE FRIENDS: Know a few things about you.
REAL FRIENDS: Could write a book about...
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Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?

Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?

Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?

Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited there?

Why do fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing?

If wewe can't drink and drive, why do wewe need a driver's license to buy liquor, and why do bars have parking lots?

Do wewe need a silencer if wewe are going to shoot a mime?

Have wewe ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?

How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings?

If 7-11...
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added by polarwagon15
Okay, she's kinda getting zaidi famous kwa the minute. She has her own show, her own song, and she even performed at the Disneyland krisimasi siku Parade. But honestly, in MY opinion, I don't like her one bit.

I'm sorry if wewe like her cuz I kinda don't. Just now I expressed my opinon about her on Tumblr and some 12-year-old went apesh*t on me. So don't hate me guys, but I REALLY don't like her. If wewe ask me, behind her fame is a lot of money. Think about it. Auditions, professional photos, imba lessons, etc... hundreds of dollars. And who paid for it? Certainly not her. Her parents. Tens of...
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added by MeiMisty
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added by Riku114
added by Riku114
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