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posted by ilovepenguins
5
50 Fun things to do in a Grocery Store

1. Ask the produce manager if he happens to have any fresh Oompah Loompah fruit.

2. While holding a cantaloupe directly in front of your chest, squeeze it and smile dreamily.

3. Every time wewe turn the corner with your shopping cart, shout “Wheeeeeeeeeeeee!”

4. Go up to the manager and tell him au her that you’ve Lost your mommy.

5. While waiting in line at the checkout, juggle some lemons.

6. Tiptoe stealthily up and down the aisles – and around corners – with a magnifying glass.

7. While scratching frantically, ask the manager if he au she has anything for body lice.

8. After visiting the bakery section, go up and down the aisles exclaiming, “My buns are squishy!”

9. While arguing with an invisible friend, wewe proceed to play tug-of-war over an item.

10. Hold your nose while standing in line at the meat department.

11. Ask the deli clerk how much potato saladi it would take for two people to comfortably wrestle in.

12. Fake cell phone conversation: “Doctor, I couldn’t possibly have malaria. That was weeks ago!”

13. Start doing a river dance in front of the corned beef.

14. Tell the checkout cashier that wewe have to hurry, au your spaceship will leave without you.

15. Tell the checkout bagger that wewe knew him in a former life, and ask why he left without a note.

16. Ask someone if they saw your picture in the post office and remark that it was one of your best.

17. On a hot summer day, ask the manager if someone can help wewe clean the snow from your car.

18. Tell a customer that you’re from the future and have just zapped back for an historic vacation.

19. Walk around holding a copy of the Scarlet Letter while sporting a big red “A”.

20. Ask a clerk if wewe can test several types of deodorant before making a decision to buy one.

21. Using a stethoscope, listen intently to several coconuts in the produce aisle.

22. Tell one of the lobsters that you’ve brought the potion to turn him back into a man.

23. Run up to the fresh vegetables in the produce aisle and yell, “Boo!”

24. Play peek-a-boo with a little old lady while waiting in the checkout line.

25. When the clerk in the deli asks for your order, mime it.

26. Walk around smoking an invisible cigarette – and get great satisfaction from it.

27. Pretend to cook a meal using the pots and pans in the housewares aisle.

28. Bring a concealed whoopie cushion with wewe and activate it every couple of minutes.

29. Ask if anyone has seen your pet snake – he was just in your pocket a dakika ago.

30. While waiting in the deli line, pretend to read an invisible book – be sure to turn the pages.

31. Hold up a can of bug spray and ask someone what type of cracker, mkate mkavu would go best with it.

32. Shout out, “OK, who squeezed my melons?!”

33. If wewe see someone offering samples, keep circling like a papa and snatch snacks at each pass.

34. Invite other customers to jiunge wewe in a game of limbo using a pepperoni stick.

35. Go up to a dead samaki on ice, sob and say, “We were supposed to be married on Saturday!”

36. In the middle of one of the aisles, scream, “Food fight!”

37. Stand in front of the ice cream freezer, look intently at it, and scream intermittently.

38. Squirm around a lot and shout, “Quick – where’s the hemorrhoid cream?”

39. Pick up bananas at random; act as though you’re on the phone and say, “Sorry, wrong number!”

40. Point accusingly at one of the cucumbers and say, “I thought I told wewe to wait in the car!”

41. Holding a flea collar, ask a clerk how wewe get the flea to hold still so that wewe can put it on him.

42. Look for someone holding a jar of honey, and then explain that this is actually bee vomit.

43. Every time wewe pass a particular type of meat, imitate the sound of the animal.

44. Walk down the aisles like a turkey, while opening your eyes as wide as physically possible.

45. As wewe pass the lettuce, turn toward it, fold your arms and say, “You’re out of your head!”

46. Pick up a jar of pickled pig’s feet and – in a distraught voice – say, “Oh, no! It’s Babe!”

47. As wewe pass people in the aisles, look startled and run in the opposite direction.

48. Bring a ventriloquist dummy and argue about what to buy for chajio, chakula cha jioni as wewe go through the store.

49. Tell the produce clerk that the bananas are fighting again, and that they’re all getting bruised.

50. Tell the manager to call for a clean-up in the laxative aisle.
added by CokeTheUmbreon
I can relate. Sorta...
video
arston
beautiful
asian
progressive
house
edm
I am often starting to be a shabiki of something but If wewe are shabiki of somebody/something there can always be a situation when wewe will want to stop it. Lets be honest. It often happens with me and I am sure a lot of people have had situation like that au something simmilar. But then wewe start to feel distracted. wewe don't know what to start with. Maybe wewe are even afraid of, for exmple, how others would take it. But don't worry. Here are a short guide that will help wewe to stop being a shabiki easy and fast.
Step 1. Understanding.
So wewe just understood that wewe don't like this thing anymore? Lets...
continue reading...
added by CokeTheUmbreon
I kinda wanted to write this makala just to get this topic off of my chest. If wewe guys haven’t know already, which wewe should have, this character has a special place in my heart. She is a character from BlazBlue series and she’s the BEST GIRL that could ever exist. I upendo just everything about Nu-13. She’s both cute and badass at the same time! I’ll be explaining my five reasons why I upendo Nu-13 so much.

1. Her design
    
I upendo both of her normal and mecha battle suit. I upendo how her swords behind her battle form placed together like a pair of wings for her. I...
continue reading...
posted by Renegade1765
2
I've been recently informed that it's literally been 2 years since I joined Fanpop! As such, I have decided to talk about a subject that's been on my mind and wanted to share with wewe guys.

I know this is a very weird subject to talk about, but this idea hit me when I watched a speech about perfection. I began to form my own opinion on the matter, and I thought it would be nice if I shared with you. Plus, as an anniversary article, I think it's a fitting subject.

In my honest opinion, perfection is a dead-end; and impossible concept that none of us can ever comprehend. Here's what I mean:...
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posted by zanhar1
90
kwa all means this is a joke and I don't expect anyone to actually comply with these. But if wewe do, kudos for offering the Zanarchy support. We accept your love. :'D

Rule number 1. The golden rule of shipping; ship it until it's proven unshippable!


#2 They are friends? Ship it!

#3 They are best friends? Ship it harder!

#4 Person A is person B's only friend?? Very ship!

#5 They used to be Marafiki but now they don't like each other? Much ship!

#6 The harder the friendship ending fall out, the harder wewe ship.

#7 If the character x's sibling dated character y, then character x and character y are now...
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added by Kragfan1910
Source: microsoft
Okay! Hi! I'm AzulaFanboi (A TOTAL NEWB) and thought I would start things off with a BANG and lay out how much of a FREAK I am. I am a pansexual male soooo... yeah this might get a little weird. lol
These men are just sexy to me and I NEED to share them with the world m'kay?
Also, I have an obsession with hair... so... yeah... be prepared for that.

P.S. Ya'll should totally check out my home-boy kataralover's article, which was totally my inspiration. Here is the link to his ranking of sexy men (although he calls his handsome). wewe may see some crossovers! XD




100.    Shunsuke...
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added by BlindBandit92
added by BlindBandit92
added by Liquid-Dice
Source: Filthy Frank
Expanded on from a Tumblr post I saw.

Kids, there's no such thing as an opposite gender au sex. That belief is fucking toxic.

The phrases imply there are only two genders and only two sexes. That's very very very very wrong - take it from me, a nonbinary kid who doesn't identify as fully a girl au a boy.

'Cause look, there are boys and there are girls. Most people are like that. But wewe can also be neither a boy nor a girl. au wewe can be a little of both. au something else entirely. There aren't just two genders and being nonbinary is probably a little zaidi common than wewe think.

And there aren't...
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(WARNING: There is tons of cussing in this makala to emphasize my hatred for this song a bit more. If that bothers you, please leave now.)

Train, wewe did it. wewe FREAKING DID IT. After watching Drive By, I didn’t think it was POSSIBLE for ANYBODY to make a worse song than that.

Except maybe Ryan.

Seriously though, this song isn’t just bad. It’s nowhere near bad. To call it a terrible piece of shit would be complimenting it. I can’t describe the rage I feel for this song at all. And if I were to shred every particle of my brain molecules, destroying my memory in the process, just to get...
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Teacher: "Anyone who thinks he's stupid may stand up!"
*Nobody stands up*
Teacher: "Im sure there are some stupid students over here!!"
*Little Johnny stands up*
Teacher: "Ohh, Johnny wewe think you're stupid?"
Little Johnny: "No... i just feel bad that you're standing alone..."


Police: where do u live?
Me: with my parents
Police: where does ur parents live?
Me: with me
Police: where do u all live?
Me: together
Police: where is ur house?
Me: inayofuata to my neighbors house
Police: where is your neighbors house?
Me: inayofuata to my house


3 drunk guys enterd a taxi. The taxi driver knew that they were drunk so he started...
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added by tanyya
1.Go out for coffee
2.Cut a stencil and put a ubunifu on an old t-shirt
3.Learn a new recipe
4.Properly fold all of your cloths
5.Find a marker with a blue au green lid and run around pretending it’s a sonic screwdriver
6.Walk to McDonalds and get a McFlurry
7.Organize your iTunes maktaba and make sure everything has album art
8.Start a blog
9.Read through old posts on your favourite blog
10.Have a movie marathon
11.Ride the transit all the way around, until you’re back to where wewe started
12.Make a friendship bracelet for yourself
13.Shave off all your body hair
14.Go shopping with only $5
15.Try to...
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added by BlondLionEzel
Source: Google
1
I want everyone who is having a bad siku to feel better and everyone who is having a good siku to feel better. The cure is mtoto wa mbwa and dogs, who are cute. Just click the picture if wewe want a closer look at the awesomeness of mbwa ( au if wewe just want to make the picture larger)

That poor girl, but hujambo a dog gotta go when they gotta go. Hopefully your siku is going better than hers.




wewe will never see the Pixar lamp the same way again.




The poor dog is in a cage, but hujambo at least he is trying to get out. 10 dog treats for him.




That is just wrong, wewe do not steal another dogs...
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