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 Perfect Perspective Optical Illusions
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There was a boy called Jake who always got teased at school he got because he was different one siku he he cme back to school it looked like a normal siku but while everyone walked around Jake acted himself like every normal siku but when the kengele rang for clas he got a 44 moto arm he shot lot's of the kids teacher too so wewe let that be a lesson for wewe if wewe had not teased him he would have been fine who knows wewe could have even saved his life.

Afew days past and Jake was dead he had decided to shoot himself in the head many people blammed it all jake when really it was there own fault at take.
posted by pure-angel
Dost thou upendo life?
Then do not squander time,
for that is the stuff life is made of.
Benjamin Franklin

Life is either a daring adventure au nothing.
Helen Keller

Life is like a game of cards. The hand that is dealt wewe represents determinism; the way wewe play it is free will.
Jawaharal Nehru








Life is like the dice that, falling, still onyesha a different face. So life, though it remains the same, is always presenting different aspects.
Alexis

Our life's a stage, a comedy: either learn to play and take it lightly, au kubeba its troubles patiently.
Palladas

The geat blessing of mankind are within us and...
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posted by Thecharliejay
100 Ways to Annoy People
1.Get to know a Marafiki bookie and place bets for them. Insist on keeping half of any money they win.
2.Accuse people of "glue sniffing addictions" in public.
3.Call other people "Champ" au "Tiger.". Refer to yourself as "Coach."
4.Drum on every available surface.
5.Sing the Batman theme incessantly.
6.Staple papers together in the middle of the page.
7.Ask 1-800 operators for dates.
8.Produce a rental video consisting entirely of dire FBI copy warnings.
9.Sew anti-theft detector strips into people's backpacks.
10.Hide dairy products in inaccessible places.
11.Insist on giving...
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posted by x-menobsessed26
For some time many of us have wondered just who is Jack Schitt?

We find ourselves at a loss when someone says,

'You don't know Jack Schitt!'

Well, thanks to my genealogy efforts, wewe can now respond in an intellectual way.

Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt.

Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt, Inc. They had one son, Jack.

In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. The deeply religious couple produced six children: Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt, ng'ombe Schitt, and the twins Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt.

Against her parents' objections, Deep...
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posted by ShiningsTar542
Neon lips, blue eyeshadow, shimmering glitter, and golden bronzers: This spring, some of the most dramatic looks we saw on the runways are making their way onto our faces. But not everything we dabble on pleases everyone. We had a hunch that some of our biggest beauty obsessions might be turn-offs for guys...so we went ahead asked. Prepare yourself: brutal honesty ensues.

1. Heavy foundation and powders:"The inch-thick powder is a huge turn-off," says Maxim senior editor Nick Leftley. "No guy wants to kiss a girl on the cheek and then find he¹s wearing foundation himself." A flaking face is...
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posted by shomill
M R snakes.
M A no snakes.
O S M R snakes.
CDBDI's?
O S! M R snakes!
AAAAAAAAAA!

-My dad told me this one years and years ago. I'd almost forgotten it until tonight. Here's another one:

Mairzy dotes and dozy dotes and liddlamszy divy.

-The answer: Mares eat oats and does eat oats and little lambs eat ivy.

And an old knock-knock joke:
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
banana, ndizi who?
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
banana, ndizi who?
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
banana, ndizi who?
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Orange.
machungwa, chungwa who?
machungwa, chungwa wewe glad I didn't say banana, ndizi again?

Hope wewe had fun!
posted by alismouha
My dear son...

I send wewe this letter,if it doesn't reach you,tell me so I can re-send it.

I'm uandishi this as slowly as I can,because I am aware that wewe can't read quickly.

I will send this to wewe with your brother,he is asleep now,so I'll put it in his pocket,if he forgets to hand it to you,reach in and take it.

The weather is really great here,it only rained a couple of times last week,the first time it lasted 4 days,and the sekunde one it was only 3 days.

About the leather koti, jacket wewe wanted me to send to you,it was going to cost me a fortune to ship because its buttons were too heavy,so I cut...
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posted by darkkhorn19
It was around 12:30 and I was at the grocery, I was busy getting some apples when a teenage boy goes over to me and hands me a cold bottle of water and a magazine. I thanked him, but apon kusoma the magazine it was full of lies. It was trying to convert me to Christianity, so before I drank the water, I threw the ice-cold water in his face, dropped the magazine, and alisema "If your so-called "God" exsisted, why didn't he stop me from doing that?" The boy simply replied "Because your denying his love". Right away, I replied "Oh please, If there was a God, I bet wewe he'd rather prefer a good honest Athiest than a preacher on Televison going around lying about his healing powers". He was angered "And how do wewe know who God would prefer?!" If it was even possible at the time, I was calmer than before and answered. "The very same way the bible was made". I smiled warmly as I saw him stomp away with anger.
1. Ask him why he 'doesn't have such a cool scar?'

2. Laugh at him.

3. Wake him up kwa imba beach, pwani Boys songs in his ear. 'Round, round, get around, I get around...'

4. Knit him things. Really hideous things.

5. Give him kangaroo-ears for a month.

6. Smile during Death Eater meetings and say wewe taught him everything he knows.

7. Chew bubblegum all the time. Should he address you, your only response will be a series of huge bubbles in quick succession, the last of which will burst everywhere and make a mess.

8. Dance the Funky Chicken.

9. Ask him when was the last time he took a bath.

10....
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posted by boomerlover
Yo Mama So Stupid I told her drinks were on the house...so she went and got a ladder...

Yo mama's so fat, the shadow of her butt weighs 50 pounds.

Yo mama so stupid when she saw the NC-17 (under 17 not admitted) sign, she went nyumbani and got 16 friends.

Yo mama so stupid when your dad alisema it was chilly outside, she ran outside with a spoon.

Yo mama so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved!

Yo mama so stupid she took a ruler to kitanda to see how long she slept.

Yo mama so stupid she aliiba free bread.

Yo mama so skinny she hula hoops with a cheerio.

Yo mama so skinny she turned sideways and...
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added by Cyrusrocks
posted by karolinak1999
I'm saying this speech on he 4th of September 2013(unless the teacher forgets au something like that) I am aginst 2 boys....my chances are okay...


"Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen we are gathered here today to learn Irish, but we took some time off that to choose a new class leader.

For starters I would like to compliment my fellow rivals Atrio and Liam, for their good effort - Liam wewe even prepared a speech, very impressive

Now..I realise the privelage to have the honour torepresent your class, however I am confident that I will be a great candidate.

I'm taking part in this not only to add...
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posted by Canada24
1: (Pilot)
FAther: Son have wewe been kusoma Heresy?! (pumps shotgun) Unacceptable!
Son: (High Pitched Scream)

2:
Father: What did wewe do?!
Son: I made us eggs.
Father: ... WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?!?!
Son: Wha-
Father: WE ONLY EAT mkate FOR FUCK SAKES!!

3:
Father: Son I'm getting milk
Son: Will wewe be back?!
Father: (opens front door) ... No
(Later that Evening, Father is still gone):
Son: I can't believe he's actually gone! (phone rings) Father?!
Voice: No this is your old coach
Son: Oh.. Uh hello
Voice: So, your back on the NBA
Son: Really? How-
Father: (literary teleports out of nowhere) YOUR BACK IN THE...
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added by MeiMisty
posted by josephlindquist
The various budget models that will continue to be used fall into categories 1) budget line items (traditional budgeting), 2) performance budgeting, 3) programming / programming budgeting (PPB), 4) zero budgeting (ZBB) and 5) location-based budgeting. In hivi karibuni years, some companies have developed alternative budgeting systems (incremental budgets), including zero-based budgets (ZBB) and activity-based budgets (ABB).
Zero-based budgeting (ZBB) is an alternative to the traditional budgeting approach used kwa governments and non-profit organizations. Zero-based budgets, on the other hand, work...
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added by Kuro_Hyou666
added by MeiMisty
PART 1: (angry rant about the Controversy)

This is a movie I had no interest in seeing. I was worried having an entire film about Joker will kinda ruin the character.. But the fact the film is rated R does imply I'm probably wrong.

But after I saw Chris Stuckmann's spoiler review. There is a interesting thing he spoke about, which I myself wanna throw in my own 2 cents about.

Before this film was even released. There were 2 things that people were worried about. Sympathizing with Joker. And the violence on screen.

Firstly, Chris says this isn't even the most violent film he's seen. He actually...
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I’ve never played the first Gungrave game. Gungrave is a weird sort of property that came into existence as a video game first before getting adapted into a video game. Little did people know that it was actually based on a video game first and foremost before it was adapted into the strange anime that we see. Gungrave is a very smart and well made game about a man named Beyond the Grave who is brought back from the dead to exact revenge on his once best friend who betrayed him and took over the mafia with the help of aliens and works alongside an anime girl. But in Overdose, he works alongside...
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