So...this is for Twilight and Maximum Ride fans. and it is a little weird. wewe see, me and my friend decided we were actually going to use good writing, but then we decided the story needed zaidi spice and so then it started getting interesting. okay, here it is.
FANG AND JACOB.
BY: FAST FARMS (aka, Flora and Shawna Teams)
Fang was wondering around in the cold dark forest. Just twenty dakika ago, Max had dramatically ran away from him, after he had kissed her. Stupid Max. Stupid, dramatic Max. Couldn't she see that they were meant to be?? He sighed, walking deeper into the woods.
Suddenly he sensed that something was watching him. He tensed up, loosening his wings from underneath his windbreaker.
"Who's there?" he said, in his best affirmative voice. A low growl echoed through the forest. Crap, thought Fang. Erasers?? He was just about to take off, when suddenly a mbwa mwitu emerged from the shadows.
Fang froze. He didn't look like an eraser transformed; he was more...human like. There was a playful smile, on his mouth, and his head was cocked. The creature took a step forward, his bushy tail twitching behind him. Fang was still frozen in place. Where had he met this creature before?? And that's when it happened- all of a sudden, there was a low growl, and then POOF. A human was standing before him.
"Hi," alisema the young guy, standing before him, only in cut of shorts. "I'm Jacob." Fang froze again, taking in the appearance of the strange wolf-boy before him. Jacob. Jacob was huge, about six foot seven, which made Fang look short, even though Fang, being a human-avian hybrid, was tall for his age. He was Native American, with dark skin and long black hair, kind of like Fang himself.
Fang stepped cautiously out of the shadows, keeping a watchful eye on the human that had, just sekunde ago, been a enormous shaggy wolf.
"Hey." alisema Fang, keeping a salama distance incase this was some new, unknown enemy. "I'm Fang".
"Hi, I'm Jacob. But wewe already knew that. What's up??"
Fang looked at him curiously. Maybe in his world, no one was bad. No one had enemies...but maybe...maybe he could trust him. Don't! Back away from the strange wolf-boy! Max's voice told him. Shut up, Max. He thought. He had never told Max, that like her, he had a Voice inside his head too- only it was of her, not Jeb. It came out whenever he wasn't sure of something, and he usually followed it. But this time, he wasn't. He wasn't going to listen to Max. She was gone. She had left him, abandoned him. Grr, he thought. She mad him angry. So, ignoring the Max-Voice in his head, he stepped fully out of the shadows, and extended his thin, muscular hand.
Jacob's hand met his, and they shook. "Pleasure to meet you," alisema Jacob. "Wanna be friends??" Fang was startled kwa Jacob's friendliness. He opened his mouth to say something, but Jacob kept on talking.
"I kinda need a friend right now. I'm in upendo with this girl, and I think she loves me back, but she doesn't get that we BELOGN together. I'm tired of chasing after her, so I decided to run away. And then I came to this forest, and met you. So now we should be friends."
Jeeze, Max-Voice thought inside Fang's head. Is this a dog's reasoning? And what the heck?? Why was Jacob being so friendly? But he ignored the Max-Voice in his head. Real Fang Voice was wondering what to say to him- say, Sure, I'll be your friend, and risk himself, and the flock and everything they had, au to say, Yeah right, go home, dog-boy, and then fly off and go back to Max and the gang. And then something hit him: His situation, Jacob's situation…they were exactly the same. And that's when he knew his answer.
"Yeah," he alisema to Jacob. "Yeah...let's be friends."
"COOL!" alisema Jacob.
I hope he isn't going to lick me, thought Fang.
"You see, I'm in upendo with someone who doesn't know that she loves me back." explained Fang. "She just ran away because I kissed her." He said, taking a few steps back, just in case…
"Man, sucks for you," alisema Jacob. "Is she also marrying a stupid bloodsucking vampire?"
Fang looked curiously at Jacob, backing away a little more.
"Uh…no," alisema Fang. "Are Wanyonya damu some kind of human-mosquito genetic combination au something?"
Fang was well accustomed to the concept of weird genetic hybrid creatures produced kwa sick, experimenting white coats at The School in California, however, a world with Wanyonya damu was a little beyond his range of knowledge.
"No…" Jacob looked at Fang like he was crazy, which was the same expression that was on Fangs face.
"Vampires. Just the regular, sparkly, disgusting, stinky, indestructible bloodsuckers that wanderaround all the time, trying to blend in with the humans."
This was a lot of information for Fang. He stood very still, almost turning invisible against the dark forest background. Even the Max-Voice in his head was silent, trying to process this new development in their lives. Erasers he could handle. Talking dog that was growing wings, no problem. Six-year old kid with wings that could read and control minds, talk to fish, breathe underwater, and change her appearance? Everyday stuff. But vampires? A new, unknown enemy that had somehow remained hidden all fourteen years of his life, that he had no idea how to destroy au hide from, this was almost too much for him to handle.
"Uh…are these…vampires…are they enemies?" asked Fang fearfully.
"To you? Probably not. You're just a regular human." alisema Jacob. "You are a regular human, right?"
"Er…" Fang hesitated, trying to decide whether au not to reveal his big secret to this stranger. "well, not exactly," he said, deciding that this wolf-boy had revealed the Wanyonya damu to him, so he might as well reveal what he was. "I'm 98% human, 2% bird." He spread his wings out to their full length to prove what he alisema was true.
Oddly, this didn't seem to phase Jacob that much.
"Ok, good, so wewe won't have a problem keeping up with me." He said.
"Uh, and why not exactly?" alisema Fang, wondering if he really wanted to know the answer.
"Because I'm a werewolf." alisema Jacob, as if this was the most obvious thing in the world.
"Huh." alisema Fang. "Well let's go to France. Because France is cool. Wanna come? wewe know, now that we're like, BFF??"
"Ugh dude don't use that term- it totally makes u sound not like a dude."
"Well using the word totally makes wewe sound totally not like a dude."
"PSH. poop your head."
"Psh poop your self."
"Hey..I forgot who was saying what."
"Huh. So did I. This is Fang. I think."
"Yeah and this is Jacob. And were going off to France."
"Yeah because were best friends. See I didn't use the term BFF."
"Oh ya dude."
"Ok so what flight wewe wanna take to France?" Fang whipped out his super handy dandy portable airplane schedule. "Uh how about Flight 17?"
"Why 17?"
"Because it's between 16 and 18."
"Oh. Okay. Sure!"
"You know, I could fly. But I don't think wewe can."
"Psh, I could run."
"So could I. And I can fly. I'm cool."
"Psh whatever."
"Psh your mom."
"Psh your face."
"Psh your nose!"
"Psh your fuzzyness!"
"Psh your…your…your...EYEBALL!"
"Your samaki looks like an eyeball!!"
*whips out handy dandy portable mirror. "Hey...it DOES!!!!"
*highfive*
So, after this interesting conversation it was clear that these two were going to get along perfectly.
Now it was determined: they were going to go to France. Of course there was no need to buy a plane ticket, these two non-humans being supernaturally fast and strong. Exactly why they were going to France, Fang wasn't exactly sure, but he didn't really care. He was kind of mad at the United States right now, what with all the mad scientists living there. Oh…wait. There was a little problem with going off to France with Jacob. Fang had almost forgotten about the flock…
"Uh…I kind of have a flock" alisema Fang. "They might be mad if I just go say that I'm off to France. I don't think they would get it. And also Mbwa mwitu loups are not max's inayopendelewa species of animal…"
"Psh, they will understand. wewe should just tell them that there was an emergency having to do with mad scientists au whatever wewe guys are running away from."
"No, they would want to come with me…"
"Well we can't have that." alisema Jacob, pondering the situation.
"Ha! I got it!" he exclaimed.
"What?" asked Fang
"Oh, no, never mind, I don't have it"
"Oh, ok." alisema Fang, going back to pondering. They pondered for a long time. And then they pondered some more. Finally they came up with a plan. (Which they named Stan. Stan the Plan).
Oh yea. they were gonna be like, bro from another mo. Plus ther. LOL. hah. Fang laughed when Jacob alisema that.
"Ok here's some money" alisema Jacob, handing Fang a stack of twenties.
"...Um what's this for?" alisema Fang.
"IDK" alisema Jacob. "You could bribe your flock."
"Yeah." alisema Fang, "Good idea. Thats the plan."
"Oh ya. So we should go find the flock and bribe them to leave wewe alone."
"Huh ok IDK if max is gonna like that,.. but she will deal. Let's go." he was just about to take off for the flocks latest hiding spot, ignoring his hunger when Jacob said, "But first let's eat. I'm hungry. I'm always hungry!!"
"HEY SO AM I!" yelled Fang. "I SO KNOW THIS IS GONNA WORK!"
"OH yeah!" screamed Jacob. "Cause we are cool."
"Like mega cool! Like so cool ICECUBES are jealous!" Fang hollered.
Jacob laughed. Then he got still and silent. Then he said, "Oh I gotta good one- we're so cool that ICE is jealous of us!!" he shouted.
"THATS A GOOD ONE MAN!" alisema in his out-side voice.
"I KNOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Jacob alisema very loudly.
"WHY ARE WE TALKING SO LOUDLY??" asked Fang.
"IDK. Maybe because the writings all CAPS."
"Oh." alisema Fang. "Let's use our tiny voices." he whispered.
"Yeah." alisema Jacob.
"I bet I can talk softer than u can!" alisema Fang.
"No wewe can't!"
"Oh well I think we can talk equally as soft because this is as smell the font goes. At least on the barua pepe thing I'm using."
"Whatever man."
"Whatever your butt."
"...Heh. That was a good one!!!"
"Thanks."
"Let's stop talking quite."
"Okay."
"Ok let's go to taco Bell. The one where creepy guy named Brandon works."
"Hey I know that guy! Is he creepy?"
"Yeah."
"OK let's go talk to the creepy guy! Because that's fun!!"
"OK!!!"
So off Fang and Jacob went to talk to the creepy guy. When they got to the taco Bell, Jacob went up to the drive thru window thingy and went, "Hey. Can we please speak to Creepy Brandon, please?"
"Just a minute," alisema the lady at the drive-thru window.
Fifty-nine point nine nine sekunde later, Creepy Brandon came up. "Can I help you?" he asked.
"No, That's okay," alisema Jacob. "We just wanted to talk to someone creepy."
"Oh. Well. I am like totally the person wewe are looking for," alisema Creepy Brandon.
"Yep. That's why we came here," alisema Jacob in a "duh" kind of voice. "Can wewe be creepy now? Cos right now wewe are just like Boring Brandon."
"Oh, ok." Creepy Brandon made a weird face and said, "Call me…or look in your closet." And then he began to change. He sprouted hair and Fangs and claws and started looking suspiciously wolf-like.
"Uh-oh…" alisema Fang, beginning to quake in his boots, "That's an Eraser! We need to get out of here, 'Cause I am beginning to quake in my boots!"
"Oh. Okay," alisema Jacob, noticing Fang's boots starting to look like they were standing over an earthquake, and realizing that he was not lying.
So they ran.
After Fang and Jacob ran away from Brandon the creepy guy at taco kengele who apparently was not only a creepy guy who worked at taco kengele but also an Eraser, They decided that they had had enough adventure for that siku and postponed their trip to France until Tuesday. They decided that if they were gonna go to France again (Fang had been there before, and Jacob had been there through Seth who had went to France in his awali life, and wewe know how they shared memories, and everything) they were gonna do it right- with toothbrushes, clothes, tour guide things, the works.
Fang and Jacob decided to go to Saks that afternoon to pick out their travel clothes. They decided that when wewe were in France wewe needed to look fancy, so the people wouldn't stick up their noses at you. So Fang found this DKNY suit for men that looked really good on him and Jacob got the exact same one so they could be identical cousins. After they spent a good 15 dakika buying fancy clothes for France, they went to the Maybelline counter to buy some eyeliner, cause these were the last couple of days they could be emo guys au whatever they wanted to be cause in France they had to be shiny and perfect and fancy and fancy guys didn't wear eyeliner. It was too bad that they didn't know how to put it on and Fang accidently stabbed himself in the eye. Luckily he had super fast healing powers (just like Jacob) so it only left a little scab. But, unfortunately, he was temporarily blinded. So he and Jacob went to the eye doctor (who was Jacob's long Lost friend) and said, "AH HAH! we found you!" and then they hugged him like a sand which and he said, "Wow cool!" and then Jacob was like, "So Phillip (that was his name) can wewe please make Fang some non-blinding glasses?" and Phillip the doctor said, "OK sure, jest let me put on my doctors clothes." and he left the room and came back two and ONE half minutes, wearing the exact same DKNY suit that Fang and Jacob had bout 15 dakika ago!!!! So Fang and Jacob got really excited and they forgot about Fang's eye (it had already healed and he could see perfectly kwa then) and were like to Phillip, "OMG! We're not twins anymore!!! WERE TRIPLETS!" and then they forgot all about their fancy France plans, and grabbed Phillips arm and they skipped to France.
They arrived in France five dakika later, only a little out of breath (that is Fang and Jacob, Phillip was just a weak human) carrying Phillip in Fang's backpack. They liked France. France was shiny and very full of people, but Fang barely even watched for Erasers, because he was caught up in the Franceishness of the moment. Even the Max-Voice in Fang's head was silent, maybe she had gone to sleep. About time, too. She was always way too tired because she always hung around in Fang's head listening to whatever he had to say. Fang, Jacob, and Phillip spent the entire siku eating and blowing their money on Frenchy clothes and good smelling perfume. At the end of the siku they felt fat and fancy, so they went to a park and decided to take a shortish nap. Fang settled in a tree, Jacob turned into a mbwa mwitu and curled up underneath the tree, and Phillip, being a regular human, leaned against a stump and complained about the wetness of the ground until Fang dropped a pinecone on his head and knocked him out. When they were well rested and hungry again they put a hat on Phillip he had a big red bump on his head where the pinecone had hit it's target) and set off into the Frenchish distance to explore some more.
They decided they'd go see if they could see the Eifel Tower. Fang decided that they should walk SOUTH, because he had is birdy sense turned on and his birdy senses alisema SOUTH. So they walked south and lone and behold, there right in front of them was the Eifel tower.
"Whoa," alisema Jacob. "Let's climb it!" so he grabbed onto one of the towers poles and started to climb up it.
"Um, ok" alisema phylum. "I'm just a regular human...yeah, I don't feel at all left out, now being able to climb up the side of the Eifel tower."
"Whatever," alisema Fang, picking up Phillip and dropping him in his backpack. When Fang had first met Phillip and he and Jacob and Phillip had become triplets, he had thought it was totally cool. But not, little human Phillip was just like total...an annoying DOG that he had to lug around. Except now that he thought of Total, he realized that he kind missed the thing. And Angel. And Gazzy and Nudge and Iggy...and Max. He kinda wanted to see them again. He was about to tell Jacob that he wanted to call Max and tell them to come to France when Jacob stepped on something and the rock fell down. Before Fang knew it, the whole Eifel tower fell apart to rocks and dust.
"Well," alisema Jacob, climbing out of the rubble, "I vote we songesha elsewhere."
That's when the police came.
Uh-oh, Fang thought, the police were not Fang's inayopendelewa people in the world. He had run away from them many times before then, and that was with 5 other bird kids. Now he was with a werewolf and a human. That could not fly. That was quite a pickle. "key, here's the plan," alisema Fang. "I fly, wewe run, and I'll carry Philip."
Phillip rolled his eyes. He was getting quite used to Fang's backpack. That was when the first police car pulled up. Crap, thought Fang. This time I don't have a six mwaka old that can read minds with me! That left him with only one alternative. The police man came up to Fang, Jacob and Fang's backpack (aka Phillip). Fang was like "Hello, how can we help you?" the police man looked at him like he was crazy. Then Fang punched him in the face. And took off. And Jacob changed into his giant mbwa mwitu form and ran. When he was in the air Fang pulled out the cell phone he had swiped from the police man that he had knocked out. He dialed Max's number. When she answered Fang said, "Yo. Max. Come to France."
He waited for Max's response.
"Uh Fang?" she finally said.
"Yeah?" alisema Fang. "I upendo you." she said. "I'll come to France for you." Fang felt his moyo leap ten thousand feet into the air.
"Okay," he said, "that would be nice." "
See ya." alisema Max.
"Yup."
And then she hung up.
"Ok" alisema Jacob, "how bout we hit that taco kengele now? I'm starting to get really hungry!" "Yeah me too," complained Phillip. Suddenly Jacob gasped. Fang looked in his direction, and there was a red headed 16 mwaka old his girl buying a hot dog at a hotdog stand. "What?" alisema Fang. "I JUST IMPRINTED!" hollered Jacob. Then he ran towards her. "GOTTA GO. BYE!!!! See ya!"
"Well I guess its just wewe and me," alisema Phillip.
"WRONG!" alisema Fang, and he dumped Phillip out of his backpack. "Max loves me!"
"Oh" alisema Phillip sadly. "Ok well we still have a few days before max gets here. I'll help wewe find a girlfriend." alisema Fang.
"Nah its okay," alisema Phillip. "I have Henry." and then he pulled a little squirrel out of his shirt. "Thanks for taking me to France with wewe its been really fun." Then he called over his shoulder, and a lady appeared.
"Cynthia, lets go!" alisema Phillip. Fang watched as Cynthia, Phillip and Henry walked away looking like a happy couple.
Fang was a little sad. He didn't know how Phillip had brought Henry all the way here with out him noticing. Oh well. Now all he had to do was sit back and relax and wait for max. Hah, that rhymes, he thought, before dozing off.
Fang dreamed happy dreams in those couple of hours before Max got there. They were filled with bird girls and squirrels named Henry. Something wet licked fang's face.
"Argh!" he screamed, pushing Total's furry black head out of the way.
There was Iggy, Gazzy, Nudge, Angel, Total, and Max. In France.
"Heyyy…"said Fang groggily, still kind of asleep. Total licked his face again. That woke him up. He jumped to his feet and said, "Hey, guys! Let's tour France!" and he skipped off into the French sunset.
Max looked after him. "What the heck," she though. "France has sure turned Fang zaidi relaxed...maybe its relaxed. Maybe we could bottle it and label it, "RELAXING AIR" and sell it and make millions." But she decided to follow him because she was in upendo with him apparently. So then they walked together along the sunsetty beaches of France and then Fang kissed her and Max DIDN'T run away! and so Fang took that as a good sign and kissed her again, but then Max was like, "Uh not in front of the children!" then she alisema all secretly, "We'll get a room later." Fang decided he liked Max a lot.
So then after they decided that they went back to touring France.
"So" alisema Iggy. "I heard the Eifel tower collapsed. Anything to do with you?"
"Oh me? NO." alisema Fang.
"Uh huh, " alisema Iggy.
"Shut up." alisema Fang, smacking him. But Iggy was smart and he ducked.
"HA " he said.
Then they kept on walking.
FANG AND JACOB.
BY: FAST FARMS (aka, Flora and Shawna Teams)
Fang was wondering around in the cold dark forest. Just twenty dakika ago, Max had dramatically ran away from him, after he had kissed her. Stupid Max. Stupid, dramatic Max. Couldn't she see that they were meant to be?? He sighed, walking deeper into the woods.
Suddenly he sensed that something was watching him. He tensed up, loosening his wings from underneath his windbreaker.
"Who's there?" he said, in his best affirmative voice. A low growl echoed through the forest. Crap, thought Fang. Erasers?? He was just about to take off, when suddenly a mbwa mwitu emerged from the shadows.
Fang froze. He didn't look like an eraser transformed; he was more...human like. There was a playful smile, on his mouth, and his head was cocked. The creature took a step forward, his bushy tail twitching behind him. Fang was still frozen in place. Where had he met this creature before?? And that's when it happened- all of a sudden, there was a low growl, and then POOF. A human was standing before him.
"Hi," alisema the young guy, standing before him, only in cut of shorts. "I'm Jacob." Fang froze again, taking in the appearance of the strange wolf-boy before him. Jacob. Jacob was huge, about six foot seven, which made Fang look short, even though Fang, being a human-avian hybrid, was tall for his age. He was Native American, with dark skin and long black hair, kind of like Fang himself.
Fang stepped cautiously out of the shadows, keeping a watchful eye on the human that had, just sekunde ago, been a enormous shaggy wolf.
"Hey." alisema Fang, keeping a salama distance incase this was some new, unknown enemy. "I'm Fang".
"Hi, I'm Jacob. But wewe already knew that. What's up??"
Fang looked at him curiously. Maybe in his world, no one was bad. No one had enemies...but maybe...maybe he could trust him. Don't! Back away from the strange wolf-boy! Max's voice told him. Shut up, Max. He thought. He had never told Max, that like her, he had a Voice inside his head too- only it was of her, not Jeb. It came out whenever he wasn't sure of something, and he usually followed it. But this time, he wasn't. He wasn't going to listen to Max. She was gone. She had left him, abandoned him. Grr, he thought. She mad him angry. So, ignoring the Max-Voice in his head, he stepped fully out of the shadows, and extended his thin, muscular hand.
Jacob's hand met his, and they shook. "Pleasure to meet you," alisema Jacob. "Wanna be friends??" Fang was startled kwa Jacob's friendliness. He opened his mouth to say something, but Jacob kept on talking.
"I kinda need a friend right now. I'm in upendo with this girl, and I think she loves me back, but she doesn't get that we BELOGN together. I'm tired of chasing after her, so I decided to run away. And then I came to this forest, and met you. So now we should be friends."
Jeeze, Max-Voice thought inside Fang's head. Is this a dog's reasoning? And what the heck?? Why was Jacob being so friendly? But he ignored the Max-Voice in his head. Real Fang Voice was wondering what to say to him- say, Sure, I'll be your friend, and risk himself, and the flock and everything they had, au to say, Yeah right, go home, dog-boy, and then fly off and go back to Max and the gang. And then something hit him: His situation, Jacob's situation…they were exactly the same. And that's when he knew his answer.
"Yeah," he alisema to Jacob. "Yeah...let's be friends."
"COOL!" alisema Jacob.
I hope he isn't going to lick me, thought Fang.
"You see, I'm in upendo with someone who doesn't know that she loves me back." explained Fang. "She just ran away because I kissed her." He said, taking a few steps back, just in case…
"Man, sucks for you," alisema Jacob. "Is she also marrying a stupid bloodsucking vampire?"
Fang looked curiously at Jacob, backing away a little more.
"Uh…no," alisema Fang. "Are Wanyonya damu some kind of human-mosquito genetic combination au something?"
Fang was well accustomed to the concept of weird genetic hybrid creatures produced kwa sick, experimenting white coats at The School in California, however, a world with Wanyonya damu was a little beyond his range of knowledge.
"No…" Jacob looked at Fang like he was crazy, which was the same expression that was on Fangs face.
"Vampires. Just the regular, sparkly, disgusting, stinky, indestructible bloodsuckers that wanderaround all the time, trying to blend in with the humans."
This was a lot of information for Fang. He stood very still, almost turning invisible against the dark forest background. Even the Max-Voice in his head was silent, trying to process this new development in their lives. Erasers he could handle. Talking dog that was growing wings, no problem. Six-year old kid with wings that could read and control minds, talk to fish, breathe underwater, and change her appearance? Everyday stuff. But vampires? A new, unknown enemy that had somehow remained hidden all fourteen years of his life, that he had no idea how to destroy au hide from, this was almost too much for him to handle.
"Uh…are these…vampires…are they enemies?" asked Fang fearfully.
"To you? Probably not. You're just a regular human." alisema Jacob. "You are a regular human, right?"
"Er…" Fang hesitated, trying to decide whether au not to reveal his big secret to this stranger. "well, not exactly," he said, deciding that this wolf-boy had revealed the Wanyonya damu to him, so he might as well reveal what he was. "I'm 98% human, 2% bird." He spread his wings out to their full length to prove what he alisema was true.
Oddly, this didn't seem to phase Jacob that much.
"Ok, good, so wewe won't have a problem keeping up with me." He said.
"Uh, and why not exactly?" alisema Fang, wondering if he really wanted to know the answer.
"Because I'm a werewolf." alisema Jacob, as if this was the most obvious thing in the world.
"Huh." alisema Fang. "Well let's go to France. Because France is cool. Wanna come? wewe know, now that we're like, BFF??"
"Ugh dude don't use that term- it totally makes u sound not like a dude."
"Well using the word totally makes wewe sound totally not like a dude."
"PSH. poop your head."
"Psh poop your self."
"Hey..I forgot who was saying what."
"Huh. So did I. This is Fang. I think."
"Yeah and this is Jacob. And were going off to France."
"Yeah because were best friends. See I didn't use the term BFF."
"Oh ya dude."
"Ok so what flight wewe wanna take to France?" Fang whipped out his super handy dandy portable airplane schedule. "Uh how about Flight 17?"
"Why 17?"
"Because it's between 16 and 18."
"Oh. Okay. Sure!"
"You know, I could fly. But I don't think wewe can."
"Psh, I could run."
"So could I. And I can fly. I'm cool."
"Psh whatever."
"Psh your mom."
"Psh your face."
"Psh your nose!"
"Psh your fuzzyness!"
"Psh your…your…your...EYEBALL!"
"Your samaki looks like an eyeball!!"
*whips out handy dandy portable mirror. "Hey...it DOES!!!!"
*highfive*
So, after this interesting conversation it was clear that these two were going to get along perfectly.
Now it was determined: they were going to go to France. Of course there was no need to buy a plane ticket, these two non-humans being supernaturally fast and strong. Exactly why they were going to France, Fang wasn't exactly sure, but he didn't really care. He was kind of mad at the United States right now, what with all the mad scientists living there. Oh…wait. There was a little problem with going off to France with Jacob. Fang had almost forgotten about the flock…
"Uh…I kind of have a flock" alisema Fang. "They might be mad if I just go say that I'm off to France. I don't think they would get it. And also Mbwa mwitu loups are not max's inayopendelewa species of animal…"
"Psh, they will understand. wewe should just tell them that there was an emergency having to do with mad scientists au whatever wewe guys are running away from."
"No, they would want to come with me…"
"Well we can't have that." alisema Jacob, pondering the situation.
"Ha! I got it!" he exclaimed.
"What?" asked Fang
"Oh, no, never mind, I don't have it"
"Oh, ok." alisema Fang, going back to pondering. They pondered for a long time. And then they pondered some more. Finally they came up with a plan. (Which they named Stan. Stan the Plan).
Oh yea. they were gonna be like, bro from another mo. Plus ther. LOL. hah. Fang laughed when Jacob alisema that.
"Ok here's some money" alisema Jacob, handing Fang a stack of twenties.
"...Um what's this for?" alisema Fang.
"IDK" alisema Jacob. "You could bribe your flock."
"Yeah." alisema Fang, "Good idea. Thats the plan."
"Oh ya. So we should go find the flock and bribe them to leave wewe alone."
"Huh ok IDK if max is gonna like that,.. but she will deal. Let's go." he was just about to take off for the flocks latest hiding spot, ignoring his hunger when Jacob said, "But first let's eat. I'm hungry. I'm always hungry!!"
"HEY SO AM I!" yelled Fang. "I SO KNOW THIS IS GONNA WORK!"
"OH yeah!" screamed Jacob. "Cause we are cool."
"Like mega cool! Like so cool ICECUBES are jealous!" Fang hollered.
Jacob laughed. Then he got still and silent. Then he said, "Oh I gotta good one- we're so cool that ICE is jealous of us!!" he shouted.
"THATS A GOOD ONE MAN!" alisema in his out-side voice.
"I KNOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Jacob alisema very loudly.
"WHY ARE WE TALKING SO LOUDLY??" asked Fang.
"IDK. Maybe because the writings all CAPS."
"Oh." alisema Fang. "Let's use our tiny voices." he whispered.
"Yeah." alisema Jacob.
"I bet I can talk softer than u can!" alisema Fang.
"No wewe can't!"
"Oh well I think we can talk equally as soft because this is as smell the font goes. At least on the barua pepe thing I'm using."
"Whatever man."
"Whatever your butt."
"...Heh. That was a good one!!!"
"Thanks."
"Let's stop talking quite."
"Okay."
"Ok let's go to taco Bell. The one where creepy guy named Brandon works."
"Hey I know that guy! Is he creepy?"
"Yeah."
"OK let's go talk to the creepy guy! Because that's fun!!"
"OK!!!"
So off Fang and Jacob went to talk to the creepy guy. When they got to the taco Bell, Jacob went up to the drive thru window thingy and went, "Hey. Can we please speak to Creepy Brandon, please?"
"Just a minute," alisema the lady at the drive-thru window.
Fifty-nine point nine nine sekunde later, Creepy Brandon came up. "Can I help you?" he asked.
"No, That's okay," alisema Jacob. "We just wanted to talk to someone creepy."
"Oh. Well. I am like totally the person wewe are looking for," alisema Creepy Brandon.
"Yep. That's why we came here," alisema Jacob in a "duh" kind of voice. "Can wewe be creepy now? Cos right now wewe are just like Boring Brandon."
"Oh, ok." Creepy Brandon made a weird face and said, "Call me…or look in your closet." And then he began to change. He sprouted hair and Fangs and claws and started looking suspiciously wolf-like.
"Uh-oh…" alisema Fang, beginning to quake in his boots, "That's an Eraser! We need to get out of here, 'Cause I am beginning to quake in my boots!"
"Oh. Okay," alisema Jacob, noticing Fang's boots starting to look like they were standing over an earthquake, and realizing that he was not lying.
So they ran.
After Fang and Jacob ran away from Brandon the creepy guy at taco kengele who apparently was not only a creepy guy who worked at taco kengele but also an Eraser, They decided that they had had enough adventure for that siku and postponed their trip to France until Tuesday. They decided that if they were gonna go to France again (Fang had been there before, and Jacob had been there through Seth who had went to France in his awali life, and wewe know how they shared memories, and everything) they were gonna do it right- with toothbrushes, clothes, tour guide things, the works.
Fang and Jacob decided to go to Saks that afternoon to pick out their travel clothes. They decided that when wewe were in France wewe needed to look fancy, so the people wouldn't stick up their noses at you. So Fang found this DKNY suit for men that looked really good on him and Jacob got the exact same one so they could be identical cousins. After they spent a good 15 dakika buying fancy clothes for France, they went to the Maybelline counter to buy some eyeliner, cause these were the last couple of days they could be emo guys au whatever they wanted to be cause in France they had to be shiny and perfect and fancy and fancy guys didn't wear eyeliner. It was too bad that they didn't know how to put it on and Fang accidently stabbed himself in the eye. Luckily he had super fast healing powers (just like Jacob) so it only left a little scab. But, unfortunately, he was temporarily blinded. So he and Jacob went to the eye doctor (who was Jacob's long Lost friend) and said, "AH HAH! we found you!" and then they hugged him like a sand which and he said, "Wow cool!" and then Jacob was like, "So Phillip (that was his name) can wewe please make Fang some non-blinding glasses?" and Phillip the doctor said, "OK sure, jest let me put on my doctors clothes." and he left the room and came back two and ONE half minutes, wearing the exact same DKNY suit that Fang and Jacob had bout 15 dakika ago!!!! So Fang and Jacob got really excited and they forgot about Fang's eye (it had already healed and he could see perfectly kwa then) and were like to Phillip, "OMG! We're not twins anymore!!! WERE TRIPLETS!" and then they forgot all about their fancy France plans, and grabbed Phillips arm and they skipped to France.
They arrived in France five dakika later, only a little out of breath (that is Fang and Jacob, Phillip was just a weak human) carrying Phillip in Fang's backpack. They liked France. France was shiny and very full of people, but Fang barely even watched for Erasers, because he was caught up in the Franceishness of the moment. Even the Max-Voice in Fang's head was silent, maybe she had gone to sleep. About time, too. She was always way too tired because she always hung around in Fang's head listening to whatever he had to say. Fang, Jacob, and Phillip spent the entire siku eating and blowing their money on Frenchy clothes and good smelling perfume. At the end of the siku they felt fat and fancy, so they went to a park and decided to take a shortish nap. Fang settled in a tree, Jacob turned into a mbwa mwitu and curled up underneath the tree, and Phillip, being a regular human, leaned against a stump and complained about the wetness of the ground until Fang dropped a pinecone on his head and knocked him out. When they were well rested and hungry again they put a hat on Phillip he had a big red bump on his head where the pinecone had hit it's target) and set off into the Frenchish distance to explore some more.
They decided they'd go see if they could see the Eifel Tower. Fang decided that they should walk SOUTH, because he had is birdy sense turned on and his birdy senses alisema SOUTH. So they walked south and lone and behold, there right in front of them was the Eifel tower.
"Whoa," alisema Jacob. "Let's climb it!" so he grabbed onto one of the towers poles and started to climb up it.
"Um, ok" alisema phylum. "I'm just a regular human...yeah, I don't feel at all left out, now being able to climb up the side of the Eifel tower."
"Whatever," alisema Fang, picking up Phillip and dropping him in his backpack. When Fang had first met Phillip and he and Jacob and Phillip had become triplets, he had thought it was totally cool. But not, little human Phillip was just like total...an annoying DOG that he had to lug around. Except now that he thought of Total, he realized that he kind missed the thing. And Angel. And Gazzy and Nudge and Iggy...and Max. He kinda wanted to see them again. He was about to tell Jacob that he wanted to call Max and tell them to come to France when Jacob stepped on something and the rock fell down. Before Fang knew it, the whole Eifel tower fell apart to rocks and dust.
"Well," alisema Jacob, climbing out of the rubble, "I vote we songesha elsewhere."
That's when the police came.
Uh-oh, Fang thought, the police were not Fang's inayopendelewa people in the world. He had run away from them many times before then, and that was with 5 other bird kids. Now he was with a werewolf and a human. That could not fly. That was quite a pickle. "key, here's the plan," alisema Fang. "I fly, wewe run, and I'll carry Philip."
Phillip rolled his eyes. He was getting quite used to Fang's backpack. That was when the first police car pulled up. Crap, thought Fang. This time I don't have a six mwaka old that can read minds with me! That left him with only one alternative. The police man came up to Fang, Jacob and Fang's backpack (aka Phillip). Fang was like "Hello, how can we help you?" the police man looked at him like he was crazy. Then Fang punched him in the face. And took off. And Jacob changed into his giant mbwa mwitu form and ran. When he was in the air Fang pulled out the cell phone he had swiped from the police man that he had knocked out. He dialed Max's number. When she answered Fang said, "Yo. Max. Come to France."
He waited for Max's response.
"Uh Fang?" she finally said.
"Yeah?" alisema Fang. "I upendo you." she said. "I'll come to France for you." Fang felt his moyo leap ten thousand feet into the air.
"Okay," he said, "that would be nice." "
See ya." alisema Max.
"Yup."
And then she hung up.
"Ok" alisema Jacob, "how bout we hit that taco kengele now? I'm starting to get really hungry!" "Yeah me too," complained Phillip. Suddenly Jacob gasped. Fang looked in his direction, and there was a red headed 16 mwaka old his girl buying a hot dog at a hotdog stand. "What?" alisema Fang. "I JUST IMPRINTED!" hollered Jacob. Then he ran towards her. "GOTTA GO. BYE!!!! See ya!"
"Well I guess its just wewe and me," alisema Phillip.
"WRONG!" alisema Fang, and he dumped Phillip out of his backpack. "Max loves me!"
"Oh" alisema Phillip sadly. "Ok well we still have a few days before max gets here. I'll help wewe find a girlfriend." alisema Fang.
"Nah its okay," alisema Phillip. "I have Henry." and then he pulled a little squirrel out of his shirt. "Thanks for taking me to France with wewe its been really fun." Then he called over his shoulder, and a lady appeared.
"Cynthia, lets go!" alisema Phillip. Fang watched as Cynthia, Phillip and Henry walked away looking like a happy couple.
Fang was a little sad. He didn't know how Phillip had brought Henry all the way here with out him noticing. Oh well. Now all he had to do was sit back and relax and wait for max. Hah, that rhymes, he thought, before dozing off.
Fang dreamed happy dreams in those couple of hours before Max got there. They were filled with bird girls and squirrels named Henry. Something wet licked fang's face.
"Argh!" he screamed, pushing Total's furry black head out of the way.
There was Iggy, Gazzy, Nudge, Angel, Total, and Max. In France.
"Heyyy…"said Fang groggily, still kind of asleep. Total licked his face again. That woke him up. He jumped to his feet and said, "Hey, guys! Let's tour France!" and he skipped off into the French sunset.
Max looked after him. "What the heck," she though. "France has sure turned Fang zaidi relaxed...maybe its relaxed. Maybe we could bottle it and label it, "RELAXING AIR" and sell it and make millions." But she decided to follow him because she was in upendo with him apparently. So then they walked together along the sunsetty beaches of France and then Fang kissed her and Max DIDN'T run away! and so Fang took that as a good sign and kissed her again, but then Max was like, "Uh not in front of the children!" then she alisema all secretly, "We'll get a room later." Fang decided he liked Max a lot.
So then after they decided that they went back to touring France.
"So" alisema Iggy. "I heard the Eifel tower collapsed. Anything to do with you?"
"Oh me? NO." alisema Fang.
"Uh huh, " alisema Iggy.
"Shut up." alisema Fang, smacking him. But Iggy was smart and he ducked.
"HA " he said.
Then they kept on walking.