Hello, My Name Is: Death
This was like no other Monday. Why wewe ask? Well, maybe if a kisu flew at your head, wewe would agree with me. And it wasn't like magic flying, it was like an assassain threw a kisu at my head and tried to kill me! At first, all I could think of was RUN, but later on I knew why he was after me. Here is exactly what happened...
I was driving to the store, and I got out of my car and went inside. I was almost done, I just needed maziwa and cookie dough, and they were in the same isle, so I picked up the cookie dough and headed for the maziwa when this really tall guy stepped from behind a meza, jedwali of brownies kwa the milk. I thought he was raising from tying his shoe, but then the inayofuata thing I know, he's throwing a kisu towards me. I bata behind my cart, and watch it sail to the egg cartons and stick into them, and I scrambeled to my feet and ran (no pun intended). I ran to my car, I don't carry a mfuko wa fedha, mfuko cause those are for whoosies, and I fled home. And now, we're here.
Well, not exactly, I forgot something. To keep this from happening again, my online friend Tabra decided to be my bodyguard. He's two inches taller then me, and is fit, but we haven't seen eachother in three years, but talked over YouTube and Facebook and stuff, and when I told him my story, he decided to fly out to me and become my bodyguard.
Arguing with him is like talking to a banana: crazy and pointless.
I'm waiting on my kitanda for his arrival, and hopefully that will be soon. For now, I'll make sure I'm guarded with a gun in my hand and a close eye on the front door and the living room window in case I see that man again.
This was not how I planned my summer Monday morning at all.