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Is the line, "If I win, wewe owe me a date." too cliche and/or annoying.

Here's the excerpt from my story:

"Fine, Mr. Gamble. Let's test it. But if I'm right, wewe owe me 1000 locks.” Ava said.

“Fine. But if I win, wewe owe me a date.” Bingo alisema with a smile. Ava rolled her eyes in response.

“Deal.” Ava said, offering her hand to shake. Bingo took it happily."

NOTE: Locks are the currency in my story, and Bingo is just a nickname

This deal completely fits Bingo's character and everything, but do wewe think it would annoy the readers? Is it too cliche/corny.

 WritingBookWorm posted zaidi ya mwaka mmoja uliopita
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uandishi Majibu

Pith said:
I think it's overdone, yes.

Also, depending on the person, it could be seen as coercion, forcing the other person into a scenario they might not want. As long as it was clear in this context that Ava wouldn't mind going on a date, that's one thing.
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posted zaidi ya mwaka mmoja uliopita 
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Thanks, this is really helpful!
WritingBookWorm posted zaidi ya mwaka mmoja uliopita
kingcesar67 said:
Depends who wewe ask.....
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