When Zean woke up he found himself on his kitanda and everyone busy as usual. One of his best buddy Benjamin popularly known as Ben came to him and sat near Zean saying “you were so tired that wewe slept on the floor. Whats wrong with you?” “No, nothing.. I am alright.” He spoke this in such a hurry that could make anyone surprised. Ben looked at his eyes which were filled of confusion, Ben alisema “ ohk…if there is any problem just call me,, I am going I trust you..”. Ben stood and before leaving he looked back saying “ I really trust you”. This time Zean was unable to classify if this was Ben’s real trust au his suspense. After Ben went out he looked at Zeal as if it was the only one who understands him.
The past covered his eyes and he Lost into his BAD MEMORIES.
He saw the siku which was clear and the sun shining brightly, but actually it was dull for his fate. He found a small boy gazing at a big mansion and with only one thing in his hands His Zeal.
“ no no no that’s past and I don’t remember anything” “ my memories are buried and if not then time and money and my work load will bury it one day” “ no I never recalled my past for 11 years and now so sudden I am dreaming about that” “ I lived my life made my path for light and still I am making path for light….no darkness is allowed to enter in that” “ it is not my mansion…. It is not” “ its not of my business… I am not related to it… even if it’s my past….then also I am not……” “ ITS PAST AND THERE IS NO CONNECTION IN MY PAST AND PRESENT…”
These were the words Zean continued thinking till his mind gave up all energy that he regained and he at last fainted…..
The past covered his eyes and he Lost into his BAD MEMORIES.
He saw the siku which was clear and the sun shining brightly, but actually it was dull for his fate. He found a small boy gazing at a big mansion and with only one thing in his hands His Zeal.
“ no no no that’s past and I don’t remember anything” “ my memories are buried and if not then time and money and my work load will bury it one day” “ no I never recalled my past for 11 years and now so sudden I am dreaming about that” “ I lived my life made my path for light and still I am making path for light….no darkness is allowed to enter in that” “ it is not my mansion…. It is not” “ its not of my business… I am not related to it… even if it’s my past….then also I am not……” “ ITS PAST AND THERE IS NO CONNECTION IN MY PAST AND PRESENT…”
These were the words Zean continued thinking till his mind gave up all energy that he regained and he at last fainted…..
I'm setting here looking at a paused televisheni screen and i soon think to myself is that the way that our life is life when we are put on hold.
If tht's the case then why are we not able to do the work that we have been meant to do forever,
how can the people in our lives trust us for the decisions that we make in our daily lives that we live.
are we really meant to be th people that we are meant to be au are we just passing through this earth with no-where to go but down, that is what i think about when i see a paused tv.
so what do wewe think about this journal entry that i just wrote wewe need to think about what i alisema and give me your best anwsers that wewe can give.
thnx erie morgan maples
If tht's the case then why are we not able to do the work that we have been meant to do forever,
how can the people in our lives trust us for the decisions that we make in our daily lives that we live.
are we really meant to be th people that we are meant to be au are we just passing through this earth with no-where to go but down, that is what i think about when i see a paused tv.
so what do wewe think about this journal entry that i just wrote wewe need to think about what i alisema and give me your best anwsers that wewe can give.
thnx erie morgan maples
Why, do things have to be so hard
In life?
Why can't things be easy
And everyone could just enjoy
Their short lives.
Betrayed
kwa an old friend
kwa an old boyfriend
It feels like the whole world
Has gone on the enemy's side
Why do things have to be so complicated?
Tears are rolling down my cheek
As life goes on,
That's what I do.
Because I feel unused, unhelpful, abandoned.
Life goes on
And even though I try
To shrug off the troubles I have had in the past,
Smiling,
Inside, I am extremely hurt
Stabbed kwa my own friends
I am deserted
Even though I smile
I am hurt
I am betrayed.
In life?
Why can't things be easy
And everyone could just enjoy
Their short lives.
Betrayed
kwa an old friend
kwa an old boyfriend
It feels like the whole world
Has gone on the enemy's side
Why do things have to be so complicated?
Tears are rolling down my cheek
As life goes on,
That's what I do.
Because I feel unused, unhelpful, abandoned.
Life goes on
And even though I try
To shrug off the troubles I have had in the past,
Smiling,
Inside, I am extremely hurt
Stabbed kwa my own friends
I am deserted
Even though I smile
I am hurt
I am betrayed.
Hate.Disappointment.Regret.They all make up some of the worst thing in our lives...then why can't we just give it up?Give it up and just throw all our problems away?The answer is simple because this,this is reality not a fairytale au some fiction story,where the writer can just have their way over their characters like puppets.No.Not at all in reality does one have their way to control their life au the lies that people tell them.There's no stopping your troubles in life au changing the regret you've made in the past ...it's life.
such a waste, my life whole life is a fake!...but im sure ive been a thorn inside of you...that's torn at wewe for years. but, sometimes i can taste how uchungu, chungu i've become...& its zaidi then i can bare. sometimes i pray for someone to blow me away. just make it quick, but let it burn...so i can feel the pain thats torn at me for years. i can't be held responsable, 'cause this is all so new to me. can i...leave my pain behind?
the sercomstances of one's birth are irrelavent. its what wewe DO with the gift of life, that determends who wewe are. the pain wewe feel...its normal. let it go.
wewe think?
yes. wewe need to forgive and forget.
i can't...
wewe can.
but i can't just do nothing...
it's not nothing!
i cant just...forget.
it's hard to forgive, and its hard to forget, but it's easy to do nothing...
you're right...
the sercomstances of one's birth are irrelavent. its what wewe DO with the gift of life, that determends who wewe are. the pain wewe feel...its normal. let it go.
wewe think?
yes. wewe need to forgive and forget.
i can't...
wewe can.
but i can't just do nothing...
it's not nothing!
i cant just...forget.
it's hard to forgive, and its hard to forget, but it's easy to do nothing...
you're right...
