So let's say you're talking to your Marafiki and gesturing wildly, and because you're not paying attention, wewe manage to honk some part of a passing stranger's anatomy that is traditionally covered kwa underpants; spinning around to apologize, wewe instead topple down a staircase and faceplant into a wedding cake, whereupon wewe realize that your pants are unbuttoned. Would this be
a.) the most embarrassing thing that has ever happened to wewe au
b.) a Tuesday?
Everyone's awkward from time to time, but until now it's been impossible to determine, numerically, just how awkward wewe are.
Well, this Awkwardness Test is as numerical as they get, because it has numbers, and it's hard to mess up, even if wewe are still covered in wedding cake. All wewe need to do is add a point if one of these situations has happened to wewe in the past month.
•You start to tell a joke ("So this bata walks into a library..."). It turns out to be terribly inappropriate. ("Hey, my brother's in the hospital because of ducks!")
•Impossibly, someone wewe have a crush on sits down to say hello to wewe at lunch. wewe have just crammed an entire cupcake in your mouth.
•Walking down the street, wewe gradually become aware that wewe have no idea how to swing your arms.
•You gleefully shoulder your way into a whispered conversation, expecting it to be about juicy gossip. It is about a dead grandma.
•Nobody is laughing at your hilarious story. wewe panic and keep embellishing until it has killer bees in it.
•You spend far too much time on a text au barua pepe exactly flirty and suggestive enough to send to your new SO. wewe promptly mis-send it to your mom.
•You rush around a blind corner and plow directly into someone cute. Sobbing is involved. Someone requires stitches.
•You text someone with the kind of casual joke-insults wewe typically use with close friends. Your message is taken too sincerely.
•Attempting to be fun, wewe grievously wound someone; e.g. your no-look behind-the-back pass breaks your best friend's glasses au face. Add an additional point if your pass misses your friend and ricochets off a baby.
•"Hi, (Firstname!)" some good friend says to you. wewe respond: "Oh, hey, ...uh...." sekunde pass. Oh my goodness, wewe think to yourself. Caitlin? Carl? Captain Crunch? I have absolutely no idea what this person's name is. (Add an additional point if all the possible majibu collapse
together in your head and come out as something that could not possibly be a name, e.g. "Hi... Clourtleen?")
Tally up your points, one per situation.
0: Impossibly slick. Wow, wewe are the smoothest person we know! AT LYING, PROBABLY.
1-2: Cool and composed. wewe are the equivalent of putting on sunglasses and walking away in slow motion.
3-7: Ordinary. You're no zaidi au less awkward than the inayofuata person, assuming the inayofuata person is not Michael Cera.
8-10: Michael Cera. You're awkward enough that it has become endearing. Consider a film career.
11-12: Michael Cera tripping into a waiter carrying tray of pies. wewe are the essence of bumbling awkwardness. Purchase good insurance immediately. link