These are supposedly actual answering machine announcements.
1. My wife and I can't come to the phone right now, but if you'll leave your name and number, we'll get back to wewe as soon as we're finished.
2. A is for academics, B is for beer. One of those reasons is why we're not here. So, leave a message.
3. Hi. This is John: If wewe are the phone company, I already sent the money. If wewe are my parents, please send money. If wewe are my financial aid institution, wewe didn't lend me enough money. If wewe are my friends, wewe owe me money. If wewe are a female, don't worry, I have plenty of money.
4. Hi. Now wewe say something.
5. Hi, I'm not nyumbani right now, but my answering machine is, so wewe can talk to it instead. Wait for the beep.
6. Hello. I am David's answering machine. What are you?
7. Hello! If wewe leave a message, I'll call wewe soon. If wewe leave a "sexy" message, I'll call sooner!
8. Hi! John's answering machine is broken This is his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets.
9. Hello, wewe are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving messages. My owners do not need siding, windows au a hot tub, and their carpets are clean. They give to charity through their office and do not need their picture taken. If you're still with me, leave your name and number and they will get back to you.
10. This is not an answering machine - this is a telepathic thought recording device. After the tone, think about your name, your number and your reason for calling, and I'll think about returning your call.
11. Hi. I'm probably home, I'm just avoiding someone I don't like. Leave me a message, and if I don't call back, it's you.
12. Hi, this is George. I'm sorry I can't answer the phone right now. Leave a message and then wait kwa your phone until I call wewe back.
13. If wewe are a burglar, then we're probably at nyumbani cleaning our weapons right now and can't come to the phone. Otherwise, we probably aren't nyumbani and it's salama to leave a message.
14. Please leave a message. However, wewe have the right to remain silent. Everything wewe say will be recorded and will be used kwa us.
15. Hello, you've reached Jim and Sonya. We can't pick up the phone right now, because we're doing something we really enjoy. Sonya likes doing it up and down, and I like doing it left to right... real slowly. So leave a message, and when we're done brushing our teeth we'll get back to you.
1. My wife and I can't come to the phone right now, but if you'll leave your name and number, we'll get back to wewe as soon as we're finished.
2. A is for academics, B is for beer. One of those reasons is why we're not here. So, leave a message.
3. Hi. This is John: If wewe are the phone company, I already sent the money. If wewe are my parents, please send money. If wewe are my financial aid institution, wewe didn't lend me enough money. If wewe are my friends, wewe owe me money. If wewe are a female, don't worry, I have plenty of money.
4. Hi. Now wewe say something.
5. Hi, I'm not nyumbani right now, but my answering machine is, so wewe can talk to it instead. Wait for the beep.
6. Hello. I am David's answering machine. What are you?
7. Hello! If wewe leave a message, I'll call wewe soon. If wewe leave a "sexy" message, I'll call sooner!
8. Hi! John's answering machine is broken This is his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets.
9. Hello, wewe are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving messages. My owners do not need siding, windows au a hot tub, and their carpets are clean. They give to charity through their office and do not need their picture taken. If you're still with me, leave your name and number and they will get back to you.
10. This is not an answering machine - this is a telepathic thought recording device. After the tone, think about your name, your number and your reason for calling, and I'll think about returning your call.
11. Hi. I'm probably home, I'm just avoiding someone I don't like. Leave me a message, and if I don't call back, it's you.
12. Hi, this is George. I'm sorry I can't answer the phone right now. Leave a message and then wait kwa your phone until I call wewe back.
13. If wewe are a burglar, then we're probably at nyumbani cleaning our weapons right now and can't come to the phone. Otherwise, we probably aren't nyumbani and it's salama to leave a message.
14. Please leave a message. However, wewe have the right to remain silent. Everything wewe say will be recorded and will be used kwa us.
15. Hello, you've reached Jim and Sonya. We can't pick up the phone right now, because we're doing something we really enjoy. Sonya likes doing it up and down, and I like doing it left to right... real slowly. So leave a message, and when we're done brushing our teeth we'll get back to you.
Hi peeps, I just had an idea so I made a spur of the moment article!!!
So, what you've gotta do is write a single word in the maoni box (make sure it's relevant to the one above it!) and eventually it will make a story!!!
E.g:
There
Once
Was
A
Carrot
Called
Bill!
Get it? Ok, the starting word is...
Who
Ghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghhghg
Just filling up space so the makala will ACTUALLY POST HOW LONG DOES THIS THING HAVE TO BE?!?!?
.."........."....."...."........
So, what you've gotta do is write a single word in the maoni box (make sure it's relevant to the one above it!) and eventually it will make a story!!!
E.g:
There
Once
Was
A
Carrot
Called
Bill!
Get it? Ok, the starting word is...
Who
Ghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghghhghg
Just filling up space so the makala will ACTUALLY POST HOW LONG DOES THIS THING HAVE TO BE?!?!?
.."........."....."...."........
Not a shabiki but she's so skinny!! I've never been skinny in my whole life and will never be.
4. Sophia Bush
She's pretty. She has boobs & a butt, but is not big.
3. Kaya Scodelario
Again with the skinniness. I don't think skinny is all there is, but for someone like me who's never been skinny, it's seems nice! She also has a unique face and her eyes are gorgeous!
2. Katie Cassidy
This girl is just so GORGEOUS!! And looks so classy when she dresses up.
1. Megan Fox
Not a shabiki but she has to be the DEFINITION of PERFECT! PERFECT face, PERFECT body, just PERFECT!!
Some people are just lucky I guess. <33
1.eat like 10 candys au something
2.chew lots of sugar gum
3.eat a bowl of sugar
4.listen to a song that makes u crazy
5.eat some ice cream
6.think of something crazy u want to do
7.just do nothing then if u cant take it it well make u crazy
8.go outside then do a game of base ball au swiming water and when u lose makes u go crazy
9.if ur mom tells u what to do and u dont want to do it it well make u go crazy
and finally
10.listen to a jb song then it well make u go crazy cuz u kinda hate him
LOL!
2.chew lots of sugar gum
3.eat a bowl of sugar
4.listen to a song that makes u crazy
5.eat some ice cream
6.think of something crazy u want to do
7.just do nothing then if u cant take it it well make u crazy
8.go outside then do a game of base ball au swiming water and when u lose makes u go crazy
9.if ur mom tells u what to do and u dont want to do it it well make u go crazy
and finally
10.listen to a jb song then it well make u go crazy cuz u kinda hate him
LOL!
1.Buy a kids meal, and play with the toy wewe get on the middle of the floor.
2.Fill a sock with pennies, and then demand all of the chakula using the money in the sock.
3.Run through the waiting lines.
4.Buy a burger and give it to the waiter/waitress.
5.Go up to the counter, and before the waiter/waitress can say anything, say "Welcome to McDonalds. How can I take your order?"
6.Give a burnt french fry to a bila mpangilio person across the room.
7.Buy something off the menu, like tacos au baked beans.
8.Go to McDonalds in your bathing suit.
9.Chew as loud as wewe can so everyone can hear.
10.Run inside and sing Mary Had A Little kondoo, mwana-kondoo at the juu of your lungs.
11.Eat another person's chakula when they aren't looking.
12.Have a loud conversation with your friend about bila mpangilio things, maybe even a fight (no punches though!)!
13.Rap your meal at the counter.
2.Fill a sock with pennies, and then demand all of the chakula using the money in the sock.
3.Run through the waiting lines.
4.Buy a burger and give it to the waiter/waitress.
5.Go up to the counter, and before the waiter/waitress can say anything, say "Welcome to McDonalds. How can I take your order?"
6.Give a burnt french fry to a bila mpangilio person across the room.
7.Buy something off the menu, like tacos au baked beans.
8.Go to McDonalds in your bathing suit.
9.Chew as loud as wewe can so everyone can hear.
10.Run inside and sing Mary Had A Little kondoo, mwana-kondoo at the juu of your lungs.
11.Eat another person's chakula when they aren't looking.
12.Have a loud conversation with your friend about bila mpangilio things, maybe even a fight (no punches though!)!
13.Rap your meal at the counter.
u wudnt know if there was mkate on yer head now wud u if u ask why u wudnt know if there is mkate on yer head its cuz it is floating above yer head and u cant see it if the mkate is on yer head which u wudnt know at less i told u and if u wud like to get it off dont try to get it off and au eat the mkate that is on yer head cuz if u do u will die and to get the mkate off of yer head u must go to the bottom of a pool and ask the master of crayons to remove the mkate that is on yer head so u can on living without mkate on yer head.....if u servived under water that long which i rly doubt u did so wen u die the mkate that was once above yer head with haunt yer grave and float above yer grave like the magic floating mkate it is so if i tell u that there is mkate on yer head i suggest not to do anything cuz it ont even bother u at less u try to remove it yerself only the master of crayons can so just dont do anything and go on living life with a loaf of mkate on yer head