1. Sing the Batman theme incessantly.
2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage."
3. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."
4. Learn Morse code, and have conversations with Marafiki in public consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeep Bip..."
5. If wewe have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.
6. Amuse yourself for endless hours kwa hooking a camcorder, kamkoda to your TV and then pointing it at the screen. <
7. Speak only in a "robot" voice.
8. Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly.
9. Start each meal kwa conspicuously licking all your food, and announce that this is so no one will "swipe your grub".
10. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 98 copies.
11. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.
12. Sniffle incessantly.
13. Leave your turn signal on for fifty miles.
14. Name your dog "Dog."
15. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."
16. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what wewe think."
17. Claim that wewe must always wear a bicycle kofia, chapeo as part of your "astronaut training."
18. Declare your apartment an independent nation, and sue your neighbors upstairs for "violating your airspace".
19. Forget the punchline to a long joke, but assure the listener it was a "real hoot."
20. Follow a few paces behind someone, spraying everything they touch with Lysol.
21. Practice making fax and modem noises.
22. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc:" them to your boss.
23. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.
24. Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if people play along to avoid the appearance of ignorance.
25. Erect an elaborate network of ropes in your backyard, and tell the neighbors wewe are a "spider person."
26. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with the prophesy."
27. Wear a special hip holster for your
remote control.
28. Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences, producing awkward silences with the impression that you'll be saying zaidi any moment.
29. Signal that a conversation is over kwa clamping your hands over your ears.
30. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge, katriji ya across the room.
31. Give a play-by-play account of a persons every action in a nasal Howard Cosell voice.
32. Holler bila mpangilio numbers while someone is counting.
33. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that wewe "like it that way."
34. Drum on every available surface.
35. Staple papers in the middle of the page.
36. Ask 1-800 operators for dates.
37. Produce a rental video consisting entirely of dire FBI copyright warnings.
38. Sew anti-theft detector strips
into peoples backpacks.
39. Hide dairy products in inaccessible places.
40. Write the surprise ending to a novel on its first page.
41. Set alarms for bila mpangilio times.
42. Order a side of pork rinds with your filet mignon.
43. Instead of Gallo, serve Night Train inayofuata Thanksgiving.
44. Publicly investigate just how slowly wewe can make a "croaking" noise.
45. Honk and wave to strangers.
46. Dress only in clothes colored Hunters Orange.
47. Change channels five dakika before the end of every show.
48. Tape pieces of "Sweating to the Oldies" over climactic parts of rental movies.
49. Wear your pants backwards.
50. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints kwa the cash register.
51. Begin all your sentences with "ooh la la!"
52. ONLY TYPE IN UPPERCASE.
53. only type in lowercase.
54. dont use any punctuation either
55. Buy a large quantity of machungwa, chungwa traffic cones and reroute whole streets.
56. Pay for your chajio, chakula cha jioni with pennies.
57. Tie jingle bells to all your clothes.
58. Repeat everything someone says, as a question.
59. Write "X - BURIED TREASURE" in bila mpangilio spots on all of someone's roadmaps.
60. Inform everyone wewe meet of your personal Kennedy assassination/UFO/ O.J Simpson conspiracy theories.
61. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do wewe hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, its gone now."
62. Light road flares on a birthday cake.
63. Wander around a restaurant, asking other diners for their parsley.
64. Leave tips in Bolivian currency.
65. Demand that everyone address wewe as "Conquistador."
66. At the laundromat, use one dryer for each of your socks.
67. When krisimasi caroling, sing "Jingle Bells, Batman smells" until physically restrained.
68. Wear a cape that says "Magnificent One."
69. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.
70. Stand over someone's shoulder, mumbling, as they read.
71. Pretend your computer's panya, kipanya is a CB radio, and talk to it.
72. Try playing the William Tell Overture kwa tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "no, wait, I messed it up," and repeat.
73. Drive half a block.
74. Inform others that they exist only in your imagination.
75. Ask people what gender they are.
76. Lick the filling out of all the Oreos, and place the cookie parts back.
77. Cultivate a Norwegian accent. If Norwegian, affect a Southern drawl.
78. Routinely handcuff yourself to furniture, informing the curious that wewe don't want to fall off "in case the big one comes".
79. Deliberately hum songs that will remain lodged in co-workers brains, such as "Feliz Navidad", the Archies "Sugar" au the Mr. Rogers theme song.
80. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head. like a parakeet.
81. Lie obviously about trivial things such as the time of day.
82. Leave your krisimasi lights up and lit until September.
83. Change your name to "AaJohn Aaaaasmith" for the great glory of being first in the phone book. Claim it's a Hawaiian name, and demand that people pronounce each "a."
84. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.
85. Chew on pens that you've borrowed.
86. Wear a LOT of cologne.
87. Listen to 33rpm records at 45rpm speed, and claim the faster speed is necessary because of your "superior mental processing."
88. Sing along at the opera.
89. Mow your lawn with scissors.
90. At a golf tournament, chant "swing-batabatabata-suhWING-batter!"
91. Ask the waitress for an extra kiti, kiti cha for your "imaginary friend."
92. Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.
93. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions, and then scribble their majibu in a notebook. Mutter something
about "psychological profiles."
94. Stare at static on the TV and claim wewe can see a "magic picture."
95. Select the same song on the jukebox fifty times.
96. Never make eye contact.
97. Never break eye contact.
98. Construct elaborate "crop circles" in your front lawn.
99. Construct your own pretend "tricorder," and "scan" people with it, announcing the results.
100. Make appointments for the 31st of September.
101. Invite lots of people to other people's parties.
2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage."
3. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."
4. Learn Morse code, and have conversations with Marafiki in public consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeep Bip..."
5. If wewe have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.
6. Amuse yourself for endless hours kwa hooking a camcorder, kamkoda to your TV and then pointing it at the screen. <
7. Speak only in a "robot" voice.
8. Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly.
9. Start each meal kwa conspicuously licking all your food, and announce that this is so no one will "swipe your grub".
10. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 98 copies.
11. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.
12. Sniffle incessantly.
13. Leave your turn signal on for fifty miles.
14. Name your dog "Dog."
15. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."
16. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what wewe think."
17. Claim that wewe must always wear a bicycle kofia, chapeo as part of your "astronaut training."
18. Declare your apartment an independent nation, and sue your neighbors upstairs for "violating your airspace".
19. Forget the punchline to a long joke, but assure the listener it was a "real hoot."
20. Follow a few paces behind someone, spraying everything they touch with Lysol.
21. Practice making fax and modem noises.
22. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc:" them to your boss.
23. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.
24. Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if people play along to avoid the appearance of ignorance.
25. Erect an elaborate network of ropes in your backyard, and tell the neighbors wewe are a "spider person."
26. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with the prophesy."
27. Wear a special hip holster for your
remote control.
28. Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences, producing awkward silences with the impression that you'll be saying zaidi any moment.
29. Signal that a conversation is over kwa clamping your hands over your ears.
30. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge, katriji ya across the room.
31. Give a play-by-play account of a persons every action in a nasal Howard Cosell voice.
32. Holler bila mpangilio numbers while someone is counting.
33. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that wewe "like it that way."
34. Drum on every available surface.
35. Staple papers in the middle of the page.
36. Ask 1-800 operators for dates.
37. Produce a rental video consisting entirely of dire FBI copyright warnings.
38. Sew anti-theft detector strips
into peoples backpacks.
39. Hide dairy products in inaccessible places.
40. Write the surprise ending to a novel on its first page.
41. Set alarms for bila mpangilio times.
42. Order a side of pork rinds with your filet mignon.
43. Instead of Gallo, serve Night Train inayofuata Thanksgiving.
44. Publicly investigate just how slowly wewe can make a "croaking" noise.
45. Honk and wave to strangers.
46. Dress only in clothes colored Hunters Orange.
47. Change channels five dakika before the end of every show.
48. Tape pieces of "Sweating to the Oldies" over climactic parts of rental movies.
49. Wear your pants backwards.
50. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints kwa the cash register.
51. Begin all your sentences with "ooh la la!"
52. ONLY TYPE IN UPPERCASE.
53. only type in lowercase.
54. dont use any punctuation either
55. Buy a large quantity of machungwa, chungwa traffic cones and reroute whole streets.
56. Pay for your chajio, chakula cha jioni with pennies.
57. Tie jingle bells to all your clothes.
58. Repeat everything someone says, as a question.
59. Write "X - BURIED TREASURE" in bila mpangilio spots on all of someone's roadmaps.
60. Inform everyone wewe meet of your personal Kennedy assassination/UFO/ O.J Simpson conspiracy theories.
61. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do wewe hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, its gone now."
62. Light road flares on a birthday cake.
63. Wander around a restaurant, asking other diners for their parsley.
64. Leave tips in Bolivian currency.
65. Demand that everyone address wewe as "Conquistador."
66. At the laundromat, use one dryer for each of your socks.
67. When krisimasi caroling, sing "Jingle Bells, Batman smells" until physically restrained.
68. Wear a cape that says "Magnificent One."
69. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.
70. Stand over someone's shoulder, mumbling, as they read.
71. Pretend your computer's panya, kipanya is a CB radio, and talk to it.
72. Try playing the William Tell Overture kwa tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "no, wait, I messed it up," and repeat.
73. Drive half a block.
74. Inform others that they exist only in your imagination.
75. Ask people what gender they are.
76. Lick the filling out of all the Oreos, and place the cookie parts back.
77. Cultivate a Norwegian accent. If Norwegian, affect a Southern drawl.
78. Routinely handcuff yourself to furniture, informing the curious that wewe don't want to fall off "in case the big one comes".
79. Deliberately hum songs that will remain lodged in co-workers brains, such as "Feliz Navidad", the Archies "Sugar" au the Mr. Rogers theme song.
80. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head. like a parakeet.
81. Lie obviously about trivial things such as the time of day.
82. Leave your krisimasi lights up and lit until September.
83. Change your name to "AaJohn Aaaaasmith" for the great glory of being first in the phone book. Claim it's a Hawaiian name, and demand that people pronounce each "a."
84. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.
85. Chew on pens that you've borrowed.
86. Wear a LOT of cologne.
87. Listen to 33rpm records at 45rpm speed, and claim the faster speed is necessary because of your "superior mental processing."
88. Sing along at the opera.
89. Mow your lawn with scissors.
90. At a golf tournament, chant "swing-batabatabata-suhWING-batter!"
91. Ask the waitress for an extra kiti, kiti cha for your "imaginary friend."
92. Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.
93. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions, and then scribble their majibu in a notebook. Mutter something
about "psychological profiles."
94. Stare at static on the TV and claim wewe can see a "magic picture."
95. Select the same song on the jukebox fifty times.
96. Never make eye contact.
97. Never break eye contact.
98. Construct elaborate "crop circles" in your front lawn.
99. Construct your own pretend "tricorder," and "scan" people with it, announcing the results.
100. Make appointments for the 31st of September.
101. Invite lots of people to other people's parties.
1. read
2. go outside
3. do ur homework
4. go around the house saying bila mpangilio things until u cry laughing
5. continue kusoma this
6. Walk up to siblings and say bila mpangilio things until they hit u and then say u r cracking them up
7. play cards
8. dance
9. play checkers
10.read about canadian dudes
11. hit ur siblings, run 2 mommy and say, They hit me!!!!!
12. go on utube
13.talk on phone 4 hrs.
14. go on another fanclub
15. try 2 find me on Facebook and figure out im not on, i dnt have an account
16. go on Google look up jay leno, find 15 jokes and have a 13 round comedy c ontest with ur bff
17. write on ur wall
18. write on other peoples walls
19. add bila mpangilio people as ur fans
20. read another forum.
2. go outside
3. do ur homework
4. go around the house saying bila mpangilio things until u cry laughing
5. continue kusoma this
6. Walk up to siblings and say bila mpangilio things until they hit u and then say u r cracking them up
7. play cards
8. dance
9. play checkers
10.read about canadian dudes
11. hit ur siblings, run 2 mommy and say, They hit me!!!!!
12. go on utube
13.talk on phone 4 hrs.
14. go on another fanclub
15. try 2 find me on Facebook and figure out im not on, i dnt have an account
16. go on Google look up jay leno, find 15 jokes and have a 13 round comedy c ontest with ur bff
17. write on ur wall
18. write on other peoples walls
19. add bila mpangilio people as ur fans
20. read another forum.
okay, on my 5 completely bila mpangilio things to do...
5) sing the alphabet backwards in german while painting a picture of yourself riding a tandem bike
4) clip out something from the newspaper and tape it to your shirt
3) try to do the chicken dance as long as wewe can
2) walk into walmart and ask where the nearest walmart is and directions to it
1) scream "where did i put my flaming green octopus?" as loud as wewe can in a public place (ie. school, mall...bathroom)
i recommend wewe try these. 2 and 1 are my faves.
5) sing the alphabet backwards in german while painting a picture of yourself riding a tandem bike
4) clip out something from the newspaper and tape it to your shirt
3) try to do the chicken dance as long as wewe can
2) walk into walmart and ask where the nearest walmart is and directions to it
1) scream "where did i put my flaming green octopus?" as loud as wewe can in a public place (ie. school, mall...bathroom)
i recommend wewe try these. 2 and 1 are my faves.
The juu six reasons computers must be female:
6. As soon as wewe have one, a better one is just around the corner.
5. No one but the creator understands the internal logic.
4. Even your smallest mistakes are immediately committed to memory for future reference.
3. The native language used to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.
2. The message "Bad Command au File Name" is about as informative as
"If wewe don't know why I'm mad at you, then I'm certainly not going to tell you".
AND THE NUMBER ONE REASON COMPUTERS ARE FEMALE:
As soon as wewe make a commitment to one, wewe find yourself spending half of your paycheck on accessories for it.
6. As soon as wewe have one, a better one is just around the corner.
5. No one but the creator understands the internal logic.
4. Even your smallest mistakes are immediately committed to memory for future reference.
3. The native language used to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.
2. The message "Bad Command au File Name" is about as informative as
"If wewe don't know why I'm mad at you, then I'm certainly not going to tell you".
AND THE NUMBER ONE REASON COMPUTERS ARE FEMALE:
As soon as wewe make a commitment to one, wewe find yourself spending half of your paycheck on accessories for it.
1.everyone around wewe has an attitude problem
2.your adding chokoleti chips to your cheese omelet
3.the dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans
4.your husband/boyfriend is suddenly agreeing to everything wewe say
5.your using your cellphone to dial up every bumpersticker that says "hows my driving call 1-800-***-dating"
6.everyone head looks like an invitation to batting practice
7.you're convinced theres a god and he's male
8.you're counting down the days till menopause
9.you're sure everyone is scheming to dive wewe crazy
10.the ibuprofen bottle is empty and wewe just bought it yesterday
11.you just want to ngumi, punch someone without a reason
12.if wewe start wondering if pms is excuse to get away with murder
13.if wewe were to busy thinking about ways to kill the last person who got on your nerves to realize I was only supposed to give wewe 10
a little starotype but funny
*i didn't write this,just so wewe know*
2.your adding chokoleti chips to your cheese omelet
3.the dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans
4.your husband/boyfriend is suddenly agreeing to everything wewe say
5.your using your cellphone to dial up every bumpersticker that says "hows my driving call 1-800-***-dating"
6.everyone head looks like an invitation to batting practice
7.you're convinced theres a god and he's male
8.you're counting down the days till menopause
9.you're sure everyone is scheming to dive wewe crazy
10.the ibuprofen bottle is empty and wewe just bought it yesterday
11.you just want to ngumi, punch someone without a reason
12.if wewe start wondering if pms is excuse to get away with murder
13.if wewe were to busy thinking about ways to kill the last person who got on your nerves to realize I was only supposed to give wewe 10
a little starotype but funny
*i didn't write this,just so wewe know*
If you’re an animal lover, like me, this story might be to much to take. But I can’t believe people can be so cruel. But I believe that when someone abuses a poor defenseless animal, that someone should be aliyopewa LIFE in prison without the possibility au parole.
A Mesa, Arizona man who killed a 6-week-old kitten after a pet chatu refused to eat it was aliyopewa three years of supervised probation on Friday.
Jeremy Tuffly, 29, pleaded guilty May 11 in Maricopa County Superior Court to one count of cruelty to animals, a Class 6 felony, court records show.
The charge followed after Maricopa County Sheriff's Office deputies learned of a DVD inaonyesha Tuffly repeatedly throwing the kitten at the chatu in 2002 in an attempt to get the snake to attack it, according to MCSO.
When the chatu failed to eat the kitten, Tuffly kicked it across the yard, authorities previously said. The kitten then died.
A Mesa, Arizona man who killed a 6-week-old kitten after a pet chatu refused to eat it was aliyopewa three years of supervised probation on Friday.
Jeremy Tuffly, 29, pleaded guilty May 11 in Maricopa County Superior Court to one count of cruelty to animals, a Class 6 felony, court records show.
The charge followed after Maricopa County Sheriff's Office deputies learned of a DVD inaonyesha Tuffly repeatedly throwing the kitten at the chatu in 2002 in an attempt to get the snake to attack it, according to MCSO.
When the chatu failed to eat the kitten, Tuffly kicked it across the yard, authorities previously said. The kitten then died.
1- be always self confident , have some self a steam .
2- be always c00l.
3- turn off ur cellphone during the date...always.
4-be always happy, happy with everything..with ur life.
5- if u really want him as ur bf au date.....try to be cool ,use the words like: yeah totally,or however....try to be little care less about him... ...lol
6- dont be bushy....stay calm and dont complain alot ....jst a little but not alot....
i cant remember anymore so......ill see u the inayofuata time.....thank u all for kusoma this..and plz maoni ,have all a gr8 day..peace ^_^
1. Specify that your drive-thru order is "to go."
Like the title says, Does Robert Pattinson die in remember me? My Marafiki alisema that he does and I just wanted to know. :):) :)
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