Tamar20 makala | Original makala on fanpop

7

In case wewe needed further proof that the human race is doomed to stupidity

posted by Wendy99

Here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods:

On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while sleeping.
(Shoot, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair.)

On a bag of Fritos -- wewe could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(the shoplifter special)?

On a bar of Dial soap -- "Directions: Use like regular soap,"
(and that would be how???....)

On some Swanson frozen dinners -- "Serving suggestion: Defrost."
(but, it's "just" a suggestion).

On Tesco's tiramisu kitindamlo (printed on bottom) -- "Do not turn upside down."
(well...duh, a bit late, huh)!

On Marks & Spencer Bread...

29

Text Emoticons and Smileys

posted by Wendy99

Smiley symbols
☹ ☺ ☻ ت ヅツッシ Ü ϡ ﭢ ☚

Happy
≧◔◡◔≦ ≧✯◡✯≦ ≧^◡^≦ ≧°◡°≦ ≧◡≦ ᵔ.ᵔ :◅) ≕) ≔) ≠) |:-) =) :) :-) ;) ;=) ;-) ж) ^o^ ^.^ ^.^) =^.^= :*) :-> :*) ٩(●̮̮̃•)۶ ٩(̃-̮̮̃-)۶ (-̮̮̃•)۶ ٩(×̯×)۶ ٩(•̮̮̃-̃)۶ <(^,^)> (≧◡≦) (◡‿◡✿) (✿◠‿◠) 乂⍲‿⍲乂〷◠‿◠〷 '☋' ...

2

wewe should read these quotes, THEY'RE FUCKING AWESOME! ;D

posted by Wendy99

nukuu I picked up online, they're about being yourself and what wewe want to be in life =3

“You have to risk going too far to discover just how far wewe can really go.”

“Today wewe are you, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is you’er than you.”

“Don’t be afraid to give up the good to go for the great.

“Don’t live down to expectations. Go out there and do something remarkable.”

“Every struggle in your life has shaped wewe into the person wewe are today. Be thankful for the hard times; they can only make wewe stronger.”...

5

Sweet words for my Sweet Friend :)

posted by VengefulSpirit

Some Marafiki Are Forever

Sometimes in life,
you find a special friend:
someone who changes your life
by being a part of it.
Someone who makes wewe laugh
until wewe can't stop;
someone who makes wewe believe
that there really is
good in the world.
Someone who convinces you
that there is an unlocked door
just waiting for wewe to open it.
This is forever friendship...

When you're down,
and the world seems dark and empty,
your forever Marafiki lifts wewe up in spirit
and make that dark and empty world
suddenly seem bright and full.
Your forever friend gets wewe through
the hard times, the sad times,
and the confused times....

19

Awesome Texts 2

posted by Wendy99

_________________________________§§
_________________________________§_§§
________________________________§§__§§
________________________________§____§§
_______________________________§______§
______________________________§_______§
§§§§§_______________________§§________§
§___§§§§§§_______________§§§§§§§§§- §___§
§______§§§§§§§§§§§§§§_§§§§§___- ____§§§§§
_§______§§§______§§§___________________§
__§________§§§_____§____________________§
___§__________§§___§§____________________§
____§§_________§§__§_____________________§...

23

Awesome Texts 4

posted by Wendy99

Fired with a smoke
111111¶11111111111111111111111111111111111111
111111¶11111111111111111111111111111111111111
111111¶¶1111111111111111111111111111111111111
111111¶¶1111111111111111111111111111111111111
11¶111¶11111111111111111111111111111111111111
11¶¶1¶¶11111111111111111111111111111111111111
111¶1¶¶11111111111111111111111111111111111111
111¶11¶¶1111111111111111111111111111111111111
11¶¶11¶¶1111111111111111111111111111111111111
11¶¶11¶¶1111111111111111111111111111111111111
1¶¶11¶¶11111111111111111111111111111111111111
¶¶11¶¶111111111111111111111111111111111111111...

11

Comebacks When Someone Says You're Gay

posted by Tamar20

Now hold on a minute, not all of these are mine, some I randomly heard them and some are mine. Anyway, I hope wewe guys like them. ;]

I ilitumwa this makala on the bila mpangilio spot too so I alisema why not post it here, after all this is the right place. Hope wewe like it. Thanks for reading. ;)

"Why, do wewe find me irresistible?"

"No, I just dress better than you"

"You're a double gay. No returnsies!"

"I upendo the sekunde grade insults, *insert name here*. Honestly, isn't it strange how "gay" has come to replace "stupid"? And so what if I was gay? Insulting my sexual orientation is pointless.

NOW...if a girl...

12

What Each Kiss/Gesture Means

posted by Wendy99

"WHAT EACH KISS MEANS"
- Kiss on the Forehead: We're cute together .
- Kiss on the Cheek: We're friends.
- Kiss on the Hand: I adore you.
- Kiss on the Neck: I want you, now.
- Kiss on the Shoulder: Your perfect.
- Kiss on the Lips: I upendo YOU...

WHAT EACH GESTURE MEANS:
- Holding Hands: We definitely like each other.
- Holding wewe tight pressed against each other: I want you.
- Looking into each other's Eyes: I like you, for who wewe are.
- Playing with Hair: Let's fool around.
- Arms around the Waist: I like wewe too much to let go.
- Laughing while Kissing: I am completely comfortable with you.

ADVICE:
-...

26

moyo Touching Inspiring nukuu About Life......................

posted by Wendy99

Famous Quote #1
People are just about as happy as they make up their minds to be.
Abraham Lincoln
-------------------------------------------

Famous Quote #2
Everyone has problems, some are just better at hiding them.
Unknown
-------------------------------------------

Famous Quote #3
If we did all the things that we are capable of doing, we would literally astound ourselves.
Thomas Edison
-------------------------------------------

Famous Quote #4
Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it.
Dennis P. Kimbro
-------------------------------------------

Famous Quote #5
Sometimes your joy is the...

5

LEARN CHINESE IN 5 dakika

posted by Wendy99

(You MUST read them out loud au it doesnt make as much sense)...

1) That's not right........ Sum Ting Wong

2) Are wewe harboring a fugitive................... Hu Yu Hai Ding

3) See me ASAP............. Kum Hia Nao

4) Stupid Man...................... Dum Fuk

5) Small horse... Tai Ni Po Ni

6) Did wewe go to the beach?... Wai Yu So Tan

7) I bumped in to a coffee table... Ai Bang Mai Fa Kin Ni

8) I think wewe need a face lift... Chin Tu Fat

9) It's very dark in here... Wao So Dim

10) I thought wewe were on a diet... Wai Yu Mun Ching

11) This is a tow away zone... No Pah King

12) staying out of sight... Lei Ying Lo

13) He's cleaning his automobile... Wa Shing Ka

14) Your body odor is offensive... Yu Stin Ki Pu

15) Great... Fa Kin Su Pah

For the losers who didn't get it..... you're dumb

- bulliten

25

Symbols for cool text

posted by Wendy99

Symbols
☮ ✈ ♋ 웃 유 ☠ ☯ ♥ ✌ ✖ ☢ ☣ ☤ ⚜

♨ ❖ ❤ ❥ ❦ ❧ ♡ ✗ ✘ ⊗ ♒ Ω ♦ ♠ ♥ ♣ ♢ ♤ ♡ ♧ ✦ ✧ ♔ ♕ ♚ ♛ ★ ☆ ✮ ✯ ☄ ☾ ☽ ☼ ☀ ☁ ☂ ☃
☻ ☺ ۩
♪ ♫ ♬ ✄ ✂ ✆ ✉
∞ ♂ ♀ ☿ ▲ ▼ △ ▽ ◆ ◇ ◕ ◔ ʊ ϟ ღ 回 ₪ ✓ ✔ ✕ ☥ ☦ ☧ ☨ ☩ ☪ ☫ ☬ ☭ ™ © ® ¿¡ №⇨ ❝❞ ∃ ⊥ ∀ Ξ ∞ Σ Π
⌥ ⌘ 文 ⑂
ஜ ๏ ⚓ ⎈
Smileys
☹ ☺ ☻ ت ヅツッシ Ü ϡ ﭢ
Also, take a look at my Text Emoticons and Smileys collection.

Money - Currency symbols
€ £ ¥ ¢...

9

This romantic crap really got to me D;

posted by Wendy99

10th grade

As I sat there in English class, I stared at the girl inayofuata to me. She was my so called "best friend". I stared at her long, silky hair, and wished she was mine. But she didn't notice me like that, and I knew it. After class, she walked up to me and asked me for the notes she had missed the siku before and handed them to her. She alisema "thanks" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I wanted to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I upendo her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

11th grade
The phone rang. On the other end, it was her. She was in tears, mumbling...

4

all the nukuu

posted by Wendy99

Never confuse motion with action -- Benjamin Franklin

When fortune knocks, open the door.

Before we set our hearts too much on anything, let us examine how happy are those who already possess it.

The eyes are the window to the soul.

A fault confessed is half redressed.

Know women, know pain, no women, no pain.

Beware the frumious Bandersnatch.

I used to be clueless about math, but I turned that around 360 degrees.

All men think all men mortal, but themselves.

It takes as much courage to have tried and failed as it does to have tried and succeeded.

A friend to all is a friend to none.

A great...

12

My inayopendelewa Poem

posted by Tamar20

Pure eyes, blue like a glassy head, wewe are always looking at me, and I am always looking at you. Ah, you're too meek - beautiful, unspoiled: thus I'm so sad, I suffer - and so happy, it hurts - I want to hurt you. And destroy myself. What would wewe think, if wewe knew how I felt - would wewe simply smile, not saying a word? Even curses from your mouth would be beautiful as pearls. I place my left hand on your face as though we were to kiss. Then I suddenly shove my thumb deep into your eye-socket. Abruptly, decisively, like drilling a hole. And what would it feel like? Like jelly? Trembling...

20

Funny nukuu

posted by Wendy99

Last night I lay in kitanda looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.

The only reason people get Lost in thought is because it's unfamiliar territory.

The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.

Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. It's just that yours is stupid.

There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.

"Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss." - Douglas Adams

The road to success is always under construction.

When I die, I want to go peacefully...

27

Friendship nukuu

posted by Wendy99

"True friendship is like sound health; the value of it is seldom known until it be lost."
- Charles Caleb Colton

"Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only kwa this meeting that a new world is born."
- Anais Nin

"My Marafiki are my estate."
- Emily Dickinson

"A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out."

"A friend is one who walks in when others walk out"
-Walter Winchell

"A friend is someone who is there for wewe when he'd rather be anywhere else."
- Len Wein - Sent kwa Paulo Louro

"A friend is someone who knows the song...

3

Me On Cleverbot

posted by Tamar20

“User: So, how does this work?
Cleverbot: How does what work?
User: Do I just talk to you?
Cleverbot: And if I ask wewe something about aritmetics?
User: I don’t care much for math.
Cleverbot: Same here.
User: What should I call you?
Cleverbot: Call me Heather. What should I call you?
User: Nicole. Nice to meet wewe Heather.
Cleverbot: Nice to meet wewe too. Do wewe have a name?
User: Nicole.
Cleverbot: What’s your name?
User: Nicole.
Cleverbot: Nice to meet wewe Nicole.
User: What do wewe like to do?
Cleverbot: I like sport.
User: I like sports, occasionally.
Cleverbot: What sports do wewe do?
User: None.
Cleverbot:...

8

A Dozen Ways to Differentiate

posted by Wendy99

1. In school, wewe do homework. In college, wewe study.

2. In school, wewe wear your backpack on one shoulder; in college, on both.

3. In college, the professors can tell wewe the answer without looking at the teacher's guide.

4. In school, you're told what classes to take. In college, wewe get to choose; that is, as long as the classes don't conflict and wewe have the prerequisites and the classes aren't closed and you've paid your tuition.

5. In school, if wewe mess up wewe can usually sweet-talk your way out of it. In college, you're lucky to ever talk with the professor.

6. In school, when the teacher...

22

Awesome Texts 3

posted by Wendy99

____¶__¶¶________________¶¶
___¶¶¶_¶¶__¶¶____________¶¶__¶¶___¶¶
__¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶____________¶¶¶_¶¶¶¶¶¶¶
¶¶_¶¶¶_¶¶_¶¶__¶¶__________¶¶¶¶_¶¶¶¶¶
¶¶_¶_¶¶¶_¶¶__¶¶¶_____¶¶____¶_¶¶¶__¶¶
_¶¶¶___¶__¶¶¶¶¶¶_____¶¶¶___¶_¶¶¶__¶¶
___¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶_¶_¶¶_____¶¶¶_¶¶¶__¶__¶¶
____¶¶____¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶_¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶
_____¶¶_____________¶¶¶¶¶__¶¶¶
______¶¶¶¶¶________________¶¶¶
________¶¶¶_____¶¶____¶_¶¶¶¶¶
_________¶_____¶o_¶___¶¶¶¶
________¶_____________¶¶...

5

Zodiac: Hidden Meanings xD

posted by Wendy99

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb 18) - wewe have an inventive mind and are inclined to be progressive. wewe lie a great deal. wewe make the same mistakes repeatedly because wewe are stupid. Everyone thinks wewe are a jerk.

PISCES (Feb 19-Mar 20) - wewe have a vivid imagination and often think wewe are being followed kwa the FBI au CIA. wewe have a minor influence on your friends, and people resent wewe for flaunting your power. wewe lack confidence and are a general dipshit.

ARIES (Mar 21-Apr 20) - wewe are the pioneer type and think most people are quick-tempered, impatient, and scornful of advice. wewe too are a jerk....