This is a Monolouge I wrote a little while zamani for drama class. We had to write a dramatic one. So this monologue is about a girl who is talking to her therapist about a hivi karibuni event with her friend.
Tell me what wewe think!
My mother says wewe can help me - Help me make sense of it. I don't beilive in therapists - But I guess ill .....0give it a try..
wewe know, Some say suicide is the most selfish act one person can make.. I used to think this too. But now it doesn't make sense to me how the most selfless, kind , person I know - knew- could be labled as selfish..
How long have I known her? Well ,I've known her for a couple years - But it seems like a lifetime now..
I met her freshman year, in Introduction to British Literature. I was scared - I mean who isn't on their first siku of highschool? I remember Walking into the classroom for the first time. I had to find somewhere to sit - then I spotted her. She was smaller then everyone else - au at least she seemed that way.
She was self reserved - Very quiet. Whilist the other kids were throwing paper airplanes and talking about the new transition, she sat quietly uandishi away in her little notebook. She seemed sad, almost.
I remember sitting inayofuata to her. I knew she was different But then she smiled at me and alisema hi ,then it was an instant friendship. We both understood each other, We made eachother laugh. She was... bitter, and cynical, but still, really nice... I knew she had depression... but... it was weird. We had fun together, wewe know? I never really made sense of that.
Heh, That night? She didn't seem different , she seemed normal. Not happy, exactly. But... like her Usual self.
That night - The night she.. Her parents were out of town for the weekend so we saw a play - She was laughing. i was proud of her, She hadn't laughed in so long.. And then afterwords we went to a midnight movie. She seemed fine , even happier then usual. I thought things might've been getting better...
After that ? I dropped her off at about a quarter to two. As she left, and she alisema goodbye - Her voice shook. She kept saying that she was sorry, and how much I meant to her. I should have asked her to come over. au at least asked her if she wanted me to stay, But this was normal - She had always felt like her mood brought me down. It didn't seem off..
I remember driving off, I watched her walk solemly into her nyumbani in my rearview mirror. And as she started to fade from my site, my stomach twisted. It felt like someone had stabbed me over and over again. I had never had this type of anxiety before, I thought maybe I was just tired, So I sped up.
Halfway nyumbani my cellphone rang, Usualy I would ignore it while im driving, but It was her. I put it on speaker and before I could say A word I heard her voice, She begged and pleaded for me to forgive her, She wouldn't tell me why.. She told me to tell her parents how much she loved them and then the phone cut off.
I tried calling her back, But she wouldn't pick up. Quickly, I turned the car around and sped back to her home. Her words kept playing again and again in my head, Haunting me. Somthing wasn't right - I was scared.
Her door was unlocked when I got there - I called for her, but she hadn't responded.My moyo started to beat uncontrollably. I called for her again, and then silence.
I think subconciously, I knew what she had done. But I didn't want to beilive it. I regret the decision that led me to keep looking for her - I ran up to her room, and what I saw was an Image i don't think will ever leave my mind.
I don't remember when I dialed 911 - I just remember crying and crying. Until my parents picked me up from the hospital and brought me home.
And, I keep wondering... if there was something... in the play, au in the movie, Something that could... set her off, wewe know? I just keep trying to look for clues. For answers. She had survived so much.
It's funny how fast things can change - Isn't