"Write an makala about your life, your thoughts, anything on your mind! Get it off wewe shoulders! Express anything"
I stared blankly at the paper. “What was I going to write?” My mind was blank. My stomach was in a tight knot. I held my fist tightly closed to my chest. I felt like crying. Those dark memories came back.
I raised my hand. She called on me. 'Miss Ivory! Yes!"
I hold back my tears but manage to mumble. All eyes were on my know. I shivered.
"Can wewe write about anything on your mind? And wewe won't tell anyone?"
She thought a little bit before answering with a smile. "Why, I don't see why not!" She giggled alttle.
I couldn't stand her. She was always laughing. Always kidding and joking. I can't even laugh anymore. au even smile. It's all fake. Just like her fake little face.
I decide to start with the title.
Name- Ivory Snow
Date- 11/4/2012
Age- 17
I don't know what it's like to smile. TRULY.
All I ever feel is pain. It comes and follows me. EVERYWHERE. There is no escaping. Like being trapped in an iron cage. Dark. Doomed. I am the REAL Ivory Snow. And here is my story.
I wasn't always an orphan. In fact i had a caring loving family. Treated me well, spoiled me with goodies. It was a dream life. Until one day. I was about 10. And my dad picked me up from school. It wasn't an ordinary day. Because he had it planned. He took me back home. Mother was at work so the house was silent. He said, "Why don't wewe hop in the shower, I'll get wewe a towel. Being a "Good Girl" I went, stripped in my bedroom and got in the shower. He didn't get a towel. He got his clothes off. He jumped in the shower, scaring me half to death. I tried to get away. He pulled me back into the torchere chamber of a shower. He was looking at me in a wierd way, staring as i tried to cover kwa looking away, but i didn't know what his filthy mind had coming. He got me in my mom's bed. he got on juu of me. He raped me. And he did it zaidi than once. He craved it. He made me. When i refused and tried to get away he would whip me, hit me. I have scars to prove it. He died. I killed him. Know i have to explain to anyone about the secret abortion. So here i am. At an orphanage, waiting for someone to say they'll upendo me. But that will never happen right? I mean who could upendo me.
I handed it in. And told her. "This is my true story" I walked out of the classroom. Looking at everone else. Tears filling my eyes. I ran. I haven't seen anyone that i knew since. After all I am the bad guy now.
I stared blankly at the paper. “What was I going to write?” My mind was blank. My stomach was in a tight knot. I held my fist tightly closed to my chest. I felt like crying. Those dark memories came back.
I raised my hand. She called on me. 'Miss Ivory! Yes!"
I hold back my tears but manage to mumble. All eyes were on my know. I shivered.
"Can wewe write about anything on your mind? And wewe won't tell anyone?"
She thought a little bit before answering with a smile. "Why, I don't see why not!" She giggled alttle.
I couldn't stand her. She was always laughing. Always kidding and joking. I can't even laugh anymore. au even smile. It's all fake. Just like her fake little face.
I decide to start with the title.
Name- Ivory Snow
Date- 11/4/2012
Age- 17
I don't know what it's like to smile. TRULY.
All I ever feel is pain. It comes and follows me. EVERYWHERE. There is no escaping. Like being trapped in an iron cage. Dark. Doomed. I am the REAL Ivory Snow. And here is my story.
I wasn't always an orphan. In fact i had a caring loving family. Treated me well, spoiled me with goodies. It was a dream life. Until one day. I was about 10. And my dad picked me up from school. It wasn't an ordinary day. Because he had it planned. He took me back home. Mother was at work so the house was silent. He said, "Why don't wewe hop in the shower, I'll get wewe a towel. Being a "Good Girl" I went, stripped in my bedroom and got in the shower. He didn't get a towel. He got his clothes off. He jumped in the shower, scaring me half to death. I tried to get away. He pulled me back into the torchere chamber of a shower. He was looking at me in a wierd way, staring as i tried to cover kwa looking away, but i didn't know what his filthy mind had coming. He got me in my mom's bed. he got on juu of me. He raped me. And he did it zaidi than once. He craved it. He made me. When i refused and tried to get away he would whip me, hit me. I have scars to prove it. He died. I killed him. Know i have to explain to anyone about the secret abortion. So here i am. At an orphanage, waiting for someone to say they'll upendo me. But that will never happen right? I mean who could upendo me.
I handed it in. And told her. "This is my true story" I walked out of the classroom. Looking at everone else. Tears filling my eyes. I ran. I haven't seen anyone that i knew since. After all I am the bad guy now.
I stare up at my little red ballon....
Floating above me,
Without a care in the world.
I wish to be like my little red ballon..
I want to fly..
So I can fly away from all the.
Hurt and Pain
And Scars and sadness..
I want to fly away from this colorless world..
And be free..
And just not care
Not care about what everyone thinks
So says au does..
Just float.
So I alisema to myself..
Self,
Why don't wewe go learn how to fly?
Why don't wewe try to learn?
So wewe my be free..
And then I got this crazy I idea that...
What if I jumped from a really high place..
And maybe just maybe I'd just know what to do..
As I walk shaky up to the edge I see a never ending life of sadness in front of me..
But if I look up I see a life of happiness and I now I want to go there...
Just one zaidi step..
And I'll fly..
Just like my little red ballon..
And be free..
~P.S THIS IS NOT ABOUT ME~
Floating above me,
Without a care in the world.
I wish to be like my little red ballon..
I want to fly..
So I can fly away from all the.
Hurt and Pain
And Scars and sadness..
I want to fly away from this colorless world..
And be free..
And just not care
Not care about what everyone thinks
So says au does..
Just float.
So I alisema to myself..
Self,
Why don't wewe go learn how to fly?
Why don't wewe try to learn?
So wewe my be free..
And then I got this crazy I idea that...
What if I jumped from a really high place..
And maybe just maybe I'd just know what to do..
As I walk shaky up to the edge I see a never ending life of sadness in front of me..
But if I look up I see a life of happiness and I now I want to go there...
Just one zaidi step..
And I'll fly..
Just like my little red ballon..
And be free..
~P.S THIS IS NOT ABOUT ME~
Okay here;s what's going on...
I found help and I made it to a phone in time I was brought to the doctors and ER and whatever.
The reason why I keep on passing out is because I triggered something in my spine that leads to my nerves and I messed it all up. I was also put on some new meds that help with sleep they messed up everything also but also I've been really sad lately..And the reason behind that is some meds I have to take everyday..
I take two pills in the morning because I need help focusing because when I was younger my mind couldn't tell what was fiction and what was reality I would get Lost in my mind and sometimes couldn;t find a way out..But as I'm getting older those meds are working against me and in there theres some type of thing that triggers depression so I am no only taking those..
I'm really sick the doctor said..
And another thing,,
I came out..
I told my mother what I'd been doing..
About the pills..
So were working that out to..
I found help and I made it to a phone in time I was brought to the doctors and ER and whatever.
The reason why I keep on passing out is because I triggered something in my spine that leads to my nerves and I messed it all up. I was also put on some new meds that help with sleep they messed up everything also but also I've been really sad lately..And the reason behind that is some meds I have to take everyday..
I take two pills in the morning because I need help focusing because when I was younger my mind couldn't tell what was fiction and what was reality I would get Lost in my mind and sometimes couldn;t find a way out..But as I'm getting older those meds are working against me and in there theres some type of thing that triggers depression so I am no only taking those..
I'm really sick the doctor said..
And another thing,,
I came out..
I told my mother what I'd been doing..
About the pills..
So were working that out to..