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posted by DE4DLIESTP0NY
(Originally written at link kwa me )


Equestria, a thriving land for ponies everywhere. Protected kwa the elements of harmony, its impervious to any intruders. Nothing bad ever happens and all is nice, but it wasn't always this way. Years zamani there was a dark time, a war that changed the future of the land, and made it the peaceful and perfect place that it is today.

    It began one fateful siku on the hills outside of Cheval City, one of the earlier settlements. Nova Sunshine, (OC) a young, intelligent mercenary with a red mane and tail, yellow body, and light pink eyes; hoof-picked kwa Princess Celestia herself for her resourcefulness and ability to track anypony and everypony she needed to. She was headed to Gallop Town to investigate the disapearences of some bunnies in the area. Nova was walking on her way when out out of the corner of her eye she saw a small machungwa, chungwa motion in the woods to the left. She assumes it's nothing but a mind trick aliyopewa that she was up all night tracking diamond theives across town. She continues ahead towards town, forgetting it ever happened. After a few dakika of climbing the hills of the beautiful meadow she saw an unusual sight, A bright red light chanzo in the general direction of the town. She decided to investigate while making her way there.

    As Nova got closer she saw zaidi peculiar sights. Tall black structures stood eerily on stone roads like a ruins. There were no signs of life not even a plant. As she got closer to the main sources of light she heard loud, blood curdling screams that would make ordinary ponies quiver in eternal fear, but not Nova, for her father was slain in front of her very eyes. She was hardened and was not scared one bit, though she had much concern for the ponies making those screams. Armed with a PK-49 sniper rifle, and an NS-16 (not real guns) pistol, she continued on, not afraid to use them. It didnt take long for Nova to realize that she was in the middle of a burning city, and that city was Gallop Town.

    She started searching frantically for survivors. She searched in almost every building she came across; lifting fallen chunks of walls, searching around every corner, and even inside of currently burning buildings. Despite her efforts she found no ponies, no life alive au dead. Nova was too late.

    She decided to go back to Cheval City and ripoti this the princess immediatly. She started running to get back as fast as she could but as she was almost out she saw a little purple foal, the only survivor of the blaze. it was standing there calmly like nothing happened. It was probably too young to understand tragedy, au life and death situations. Nova started to pick up the mtoto, foal when she heard movement other than that of herself and the foal's. Nova turned around to the glare of a red creature, covered in bright red flames. there was no doubt in her mind that it alone reduced the city to ashes and embers.

    Nova quickly swiped the mtoto, foal off the ground and secured it tho the strap that she uses to hold her rifle, and began sprinting towards the meadow, she didnt want to fight something that she has never seen before, au ever even knew existed. Once she exited the city and started entering the meadow just outside she realized that if she ran into the meadow the creature would follow, and simply burn it as well. luckily there was a river nearby that would stop it cold, if she could lead it to it. Nevertheless she started running towards the stream. The beast never broke its line of sight with Nova in an everlasting leer.

    Nova jumped over the river and looked back at the creature it was still following her, slowly. It walked down the bank, and in the river,still never breaking its line of sight. It walked straight into the river. When it was completely submerged Nova calmly turned around, placed the mtoto, foal on the ground, and started guiding it back to Cheval City.

    [center]But the fight was not over.[/center]

     Amazingly, the creature resurfaced from what should've been a cold end. Shortly afterwards it let out a ground-shattering battlecry, and charged at Nova faster than ever. This regained her attention, and she evaded the creature's attack barely in time, but not fast enough. The creature got close enough for its moto to burn her rear right leg. In addition, in her haste she left the foal, putting it in the mercy of the beast. Nova was down, and the creature, flames brighter than ever, started towards the foal. Nova knew that if she didn't do something, that mtoto, foal would be dead before it could even strike it down.

    As fast as she could she took her pistol and fired one shot in the air to get the beast's attention. It worked, but she still didn't have much time. Now the beast was charging Nova again, and she was still down, but now she was shooting to kill. With one hoof she fired her pistol multiple times, unloading the entire clip. This however was very inaccurate and most shots missed. The few that did had little effect on the beast, but it did slow it down. This gave Nova the time she needed to recover after a few zaidi seconds, she was able to stand up again, just before the beast got close. She evaded the strike, and began to pull out her sniper rifle; the only thing left that could stop it. But the creature got smarter and started using its own projectiles. The beast shot a beam of moto at her. She evaded it but in exchange didn't have the time to pull out her rifle. The beast shot zaidi moto at her, and it missed every time, but Nova still didn't have enough time to finish it.

    The creature grew tired and returned its attention back to the foal. It knew that it couldn't fight back. Nova finally had her chance to end it all, but there was absolutely no margin for error, au the mtoto, foal will die. She only had one shot
    [center]
    She pulled out her rifle,
    Held it firmly in her hooves,
    Held her breath,
    And pulled the trigger...[/center]
    
    [center]She Missed[/center]

    The beast shot its moto at the foal, and Nova could do nothing but watch and reload her rifle.

    Suddenly, a field of energy surrounded the foal; saving its life. Only the mtoto, foal was responsible for it. Nova was awestruck, but didn't hesitate and took the sekunde shot. The bullet penetrated deep within its skull (assuming it has one) and the beast fell to the heated dirt below. after a few sekunde its moto decreased; from red, to orange, to yellow, to blue, to nothing. She examined the metal shell it had for a body, cold to the touch. They began their journey back to Cheval City once more. She now took a closer look at the foal. It was a female unicorn with purple hair. Nova decided to raise the gppony, pony as her own, and named her Twilight Sparkle.




[center]CHAPTER TWO IN PROGRESS[/center]
    Don't worry that WAS NOT the "dark time,"or"epic battle I mentioned" this is only the beginning I AM MAKING zaidi if wewe like it , follow me THERE'S zaidi COMING SOON.
posted by Seanthehedgehog
After mentioning things wewe should only do alone, Tom had another segment for his audience to enjoy.

Tom: wewe know one thing I like to do when I'm alone? Rewatch some episodes of On The Block.
Crowd: *Cheering*
Tom: Not only do I enjoy comedy, but I also enjoy being an actor. It's the only job where wewe can get away with murder.
Crowd: *Quietly laughing*
Tom: Unless you're Robert Deniro, and the main protagonist is Al Pacino.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Seeing those two together was a lot of fun, but what really surprised me was seeing Pacino as a cop. He's normally the criminal, but I still got a kick...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
 Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see!
Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see!


St. Foalis Maressouri, 6 PM.

A crowd of thousands of ponies gathered at the Gateway Arch to experience a comedy onyesha that was being filmed live in 4k. The comedian? Tom Foolery.

Crowd: *Clapping, and chanting* Tom! Tom! Tom! Tom! Tom! Tom! Tom!
Tom: *Arrives at a temporary stage under the Gateway Arch*
Crowd: *Cheering, as they continue to clap*
Tom: Thank wewe everypony.
Crowd: *Continuing to cheer and clap*
Tom: Thank wewe very much.
Crowd: *Continuing to cheer and clap*
Tom: And shut up.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom:...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog


Jerry: Sorry, but I got nothing.
Vito: I don't feel like dying. That's the reason we left the family in the first place.
Harlan: *Hears a car* What's that? *Looks out the window*
Vito: What is it?
Harlan: A cop.

The three stallions started to panic, but Vito had a plan.

Vito: I think I know what to do. Go upstairs and let me handle this.
Police Pony: *Rings the doorbell*
Vito: *Opens the door* How can I help wewe officer?
Police Pony: We got a complaint a while ago. Apparently this morning, some ponies had a gunfight just in front of your house. wewe know anything about this?
Vito: No. I was riding...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
What to expect in this episode.

Twilight Sparkle: *In a black convertible, kubadilishwa with two Royal Guards. A bullet hits the door of the convertible, kubadilishwa they're in*
Royal Guard: Princess, get down!

---

Captain Jefferson: Someone tried to assassinate the princess as she entered our town.

---

Twilight: Why would somepony want me dead?
Toby: That's what we're trying to find out.

---

Tim: *Gets punched three times kwa a blue unicorn. He gets punched one zaidi time, and his glasses break*

Intro
Song: link

Julia: *Driving her police car on the round freeway*
Tim: *Sitting inayofuata to her*

Gran Turismo

Starring Larry Wilcox as Tim...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
What to expect in this week's episode.

Tim: You're splitting us up?
Captain Jefferson: Just until Saturday. Someone's gotta teach the new guys what to do.

---

Pony: *Driving a sports car* Turn on the nitrous.
Pony 2: *Turns on the nitrous*
Pony: *Going faster*

---

Captain Jefferson: These two guys are wanted kwa the State Troopers, both in this state, and in Pennsylvania.
Tim: *Driving after the bad guys*
Captain Jefferson: We gotta be on our game.
Tim: *Hits another car, and goes on two wheels*

Song: link

Julia: *Driving her police car on the round freeway*
Tim: *Sitting inayofuata to her*

Gran Turismo

Starring...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
When Saten Twist returned to Los Angeles in the Super Chief, he saw Jake looking at him.

Jake: *Angry*
Saten: *Sweating* Why is he giving me that look? *Stops the train*
Jake: *Tapping his left front hoof on the ground, waiting for Saten Twist*
Saten: *Climbs down from the engine's cab* Why are wewe angry at me?
Jake: wewe owe me an apology for the way wewe talked to me yesterday.
Saten: John-
Jake: IT'S JAKE!!!!
Saten: Why are wewe getting angry at me all of a sudden?
Jake: Your lecture towards me made me lose my job, and now I can't find work anywhere else.
Saten: wewe quit?
Jake: Yeah. I'm still waiting...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
 Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see!
Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see!


Song: link
 Celestia: *Runs from the left. She jumps up, her wings spreading wide, then her face gets into the triangle*
Celestia: *Runs from the left. She jumps up, her wings spreading wide, then her face gets into the triangle*


Albuquerque, New Mexicolt. July 19th, 1958

Saten Twist: *Walking towards the Super Chief*
Stallion 16: Here to take this train all the way to Los Angeles?
Saten Twist: *Nods, and climbs into the cab*
Conductor: All aboard!!
Saten Twist: *Blows the horn twice, and makes the train go forward*
 This is the train Saten Twist is driving, called the Super Chief. A luxury train for ponies.
This is the train Saten Twist is driving, called the Super Chief. A luxury train for ponies....
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Oh shit, BT's not making fun of someone this time around? (well in an indirect way I might be but let's see where this goes)

Yeah, I don't care if anyone reads this, I just want to get this off of my chest, because I'm gonna try and be real with this site for once and it's 1 AM in the morning.

One thing I've noticed in the time that i've been a part of this club (since like, 2012 au something, idk), is that this club has Lost its backbone. The hivi karibuni year, now, I've been shitposting like mad, pissing in everyone's cornflakes. I have admittedly been the worst kind of person, for NO good reason....
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added by NocturnalMirage
Source: facebook, EQD
posted by SomeoneButNoone
My name? Alonzo Langusa. Age when I started operating? 23.


Act II

Vengeance...

Living was hard. I had to hide my name. I had to find a good job yet there was not enough money. Life was rough and it was because of these man. Vincent Galar, Apollo Monetto and Angelo Vertezio. I was taught kwa ma'am Crossroad not to kill. Yet I wanted to. I wanted vengeance. At age of 15 I started smoking and further drinking at age of 17 until at age of 23 I was kicked from my apartment. I went to Canterlot to find my good old friend her name was Clara. When I came she was shocked. I still remember it.


"Who are you?"...
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posted by SomeoneButNoone
It was a cold night like this one when my father smoked his last cigarette in our family house. The night so cold even me myself did not want to go out. The time? As a kid wewe don't care about that. It was dark, and it was winter. krisimasi day. After Equestrian economical fall and industrial boom, everyone changed, the dirty mafias started to leak. My father was part of one of these. A high up. One of important people in Vertezio familia. Still on that night...

Act I

That Night...

"So how was your siku outside" Father asked me with a smile. "Good" was all I answered. I was 11 what could I say....
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added by NocturnalMirage
Source: Facebook
posted by SomeoneButNoone
Darkness - *burst into room* Bad news! Void was kidnapped!
Dan - What?!
Snowflake - Void...


----
Location - ???
---

Void - *wakes up strapped to some meza, jedwali covered with bandages* What the...
Nyx - Good siku VOID. I never thought wewe will be the first to feel truth.
Void - What are you- *looks at him and see big machine behind him*
Nyx - Ah wewe see this. My project. matunda of my reschearch. The best weapon ever. wewe know - cores are great aren't they. They stay alive for 20 years. But wewe know what is better in them. Their power. A sheer power that may songesha body au stimulate brain. And this sekunde thing...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Tim, and Julia returned to the police station.

Captain Jefferson: Tim Miller, and Julia Rose.
Tim: Hello Captain.
Captain Jefferson: I heard about your heroic act on Monday Avenue. Well done.
Julia: Don't give us all of the credit Captain. There were other officers as well.
Captain Jefferson: I understand. When I see them, I'll give them their congrats as well.
Tim: We still on stakeout tomorrow Captain?
Captain Jefferson: That's right. You're on stakeout until further notice.

Next day.

Tim: *Driving his fira, viper passing Local Consideration*
Julia: Let's check out The Highway.
Tim: *Turns right on Byer Lane*...
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posted by SomeoneButNoone
Epilouge.
----------------
5 Years later.
----
Canterlot
13th May
---
Sandman - 13th of may...
Mare - A really fearful siku huh?
Sandman - Damn right. I saw this city burn. I saw it die slowly.
Mare - It's okay. It's not rebuilded fully but it has buty it had before.
Sandman - Maybe but Eiffla tower won't be fixed. New York statue the same.
Mare - You're right on that...
---
Ice - Damn it's hot this may.
Fire - Yeah. It was quiet hot that siku too.
Ice - Damn right.

----
Colt - Dad tell me about the war!
Damien - Well your dad fought for city we live in - Canterlot. wewe know it was hard but your daddy wanted to...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Date: April 12, 1963
Location: Cheyenne Wyoming
Time: 8:46 AM
Railroad: Union Pacific

Stylo walked into the station, and was going to talk to Pete, when he came out of his office.

Pete: There wewe are Stylo. I need wewe to come here.
Stylo: Perfect. I was just on my way to see you. *Enters Pete's office*

They say down at Pete's desk

Stylo: Sir,
Stylo & Pete: If I may start fir-
Audience: *Laughing*
Stylo & Pete: It's fine, wewe can-
Audience: *Laughing*
Stylo & Pete: Wanna go first?
Audience: *Laughing*
Pete: wewe go first.
Stylo: Okay. I've had it with Mike destroying our stuff on this railroad....
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Theme song >>>> link

Taxi Ponies: *Driving taxi cabs to the station*

Ponies On The Rails

Starring

Pierce Hawkins "Hawkeye" From SeanTheHedgehog

Snowflake & Orion From Alinah09

Metal Gloss From DragonAura15

Railway Pony: *Driving freight train across a bridge going over the train tracks at the station.*
Metal Gloss: *Drives freight train under bridge*
Pony: *In the station, buying a ticket. As soon as he gets the ticket, he runs across the platform, and boards his train.*
Hawkeye: *Preparing train for departure*
Stylo: *Looking at orders on paper*
Hawkeye: *Blows horn twice*...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Lewis: *Playing cards with Andy, Bob, and Orion*
Shawn: Thanks for inviting us over wewe two.
Andy: You're welcome.

The doorbell rang.

Lewis: I'll get it. *Stands up* Don't wewe dare look at my cards.
Shawn: I'll make sure they don't Lewis.
Lewis: *Opens the door*
Pony 83: Yo, what's good homie?
Lewis: I'm playing cards with some friends. Can I help you?
Pony 83: Yeah man. wewe know Kyle Jordan? The gppony, pony that owns the Video Store?
Lewis: Yeah. What about him?
Pony 83: Earlier today, I went to his store, but it was empty. He didn't lock the door, and just left everything out like it was open. Now I know Kyle,...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Song: link

The Silver Ballroom

Bevo, St. Foalis, July 9, 1996

It was 1 in the morning. Lewis, and Bob were sitting inayofuata to each other at one end of the bar, and Benjamin Guarino was at the other end, with four of his friends.

Benjamin: Hey, how are wewe two doing over there?
Lewis: Fine, fine.
Benjamin: Drinks all around.
Bartender: *Preparing drinks*
Benjamin: We're getting close to the end of the 20th Century. Let's enjoy it while it lasts!
Lewis: Yeah, the 21st Century is only a few years away.
Bartender: *Gives everypony their drinks*
Benjamin: Enjoy the drinks fellas!
Bob: Yeah, juu of the morning...
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posted by SomeoneButNoone
12:32
Cafe.

---
Slash - So why wewe called me here for.
Midnight - First to enjoy some coffee and get some info from you.
Slash - About fox?
Midnight - Bingo.
Slash - Not much to say... It's *sighs* truly appreciated formula for sadistic rulers.
Midnight - What do wewe mean?
Slash - If wewe make a legend, someone will copy it. And it becomes domino effect.One fox, mbweha dies, two rises. No one can stop it *takes cigarette.*
Midnight - That's awful...
Slash - Every formula have flaw of course. But I can't break it myself.
Midnight - I'll help!
Slash - Huh? How...
Midnight - I will catch every fox, mbweha for you!
Slash - Hm......
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