#1:
Mastersword as an interviewer: hujambo princess Twilight. Good having wewe here.
Twilight: Sure.
Sword: First off. How dose it feel being the forth princess ever?
Twilight: (barely even lessoning) Yes. I wouldn't be here without my friends.
Sword: That's nice. But the swali is, how dose it make 'you' feel. YOU!?
Twilight: (still barely lessoning) Yes. That is diffently a swali being asked. And I'm confident in my friends. And getting it done.
Sword: Okay.. Have to be honest with you. I feel like this interview. Is going absolutely nowhere. wewe answered 'none' of my questions. wewe kinda sound like a broken automatic response system, that's only been tought 4 phrases.
Twilight: (not lessening) Thanks. It's been an experience.
Sword: *annoyed* Yeah it has!
Twilight: *listing stuff about friendship*
Sword: What are yo- *looks behind him* Are wewe kusoma cue cards wait now!?.. What is this!?
Twilight: *still kusoma off them*
Sword: (proving point to audience) What's your name lady!?
Twilight: .. Dedication.
Sword: (angrily to camera) Her name is dedication!
#2:
Derpy: Saten. He's not even as dorky as wewe say he is.
Sword: Wha-
Saten: Well.. I still loved pranking him anyway.
Derpy: (laughs) wewe did?..
Saten: Yes.. I remember I use to put fibreglass shards in his gym shorts. Every time he had to take a pee. He'd come back crying. *Saten and Derpy laugh*
Sword: It wasn't funny. It was painful.. Wasn't so much the fiber. As it was the glass!.. I had to get a urethra transplant.. And those are COSTLY!
Sword: wewe should hear his zaidi hivi karibuni ones.. (to Saten) Tell her what wewe did a the other day.
Saten: Well.. I mailed a wild hog to house the other day.
Sword: (angrily) THERE'S GIANT PIG WITH HORNS! LIVING IN THE BASEMENT!
Saten: Plus.. The time before that. We were suppose to have a sleepover at his house., I was planning to sneak laxatives into his cereal.. But the sleep over got canceled so I couldn't get him with that one.
Derpy: Ohh... But the idea was still there.
Saten: Oh! Differently (they highfive)
Sword: (arrogantly) HE DIDN'T GET ME THOUGH! He didn't get me... DidyougetmeSaten? Didyougetme!?
Satan: No-
Sword: No! wewe did not get me!.. Who didn't get me... Saten Twist.
Saten: wewe know what.. Fuck it.. Fine. wewe guys can go out.. But only once.
Sword: Good enough. *leaves*
Sword: Alright Derpy.. Let's go.
Derpy: Fine.
Sword: Just remember one thing tonight. One thing.. Your cousin did NOT get me with poop thing..
#3:
Master Sword: (hiding behind wall) Come on. Come on.
Saten: (walks in) Excuse me I-
Sword: (tackles him and start violently beating him up)... (stops).. Sorry. (pants). I thought wewe were the mafia.
Saten: N No I'm Saten Twist.
Sword: Who?
Saten: I've been asked to interview you.
Sword: Interview!?. (eyes narrow) Well. wewe can't interview a dead man now CAN YOU! (jumps out the four story window, and ends up going into ambulance, and he waves evily to Saten, as Saten watches him get lifted into the ambulance).
#4:
Iron will: Welcome. To Iron wills onyesha on being assertive.. Here's how being assertive works. wewe take down who's bigger then you.. Example. Who's the toughest gppony, pony in the crowd?
Sword: (there with Fluttershy) Well. I don't mean to toot my own horn, but I believe I hold the extinction o- (gets grabbed kwa Iron will and gets violently beaten up from off view).
Iron Will: Alright. Know who's the funniest?
Sword: I know my way around a jo- (starts getting beat up again).
#5:
Twilight: (sleeping soundly).. (she is suddenly awaken kwa a loud gunshot) WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT!? (runs done stairs, and suddenly gasps)..
Master Sword: (holding pistol, and Santa Clause is seen laying dead from a bullet though his head).. (groans). Before wewe start.
Twilight: Jesus christ!
Master Sword: (annoyedly) Okay! Before, you, start!
Twilight: holly SHIT!
Master Sword: (annoyed) wewe gonna let me explain!?
Twilight: (angry) Yes Sword! I would upendo to know why wewe shot and killed, FATHER CHRISTMAS!
Master Sword: ... He startled me!
Twilight: (annoyed) HE STARTLED YOU!?
Master Sword: He! Startled me!
Twilight: (sarcastically) Oh, guess he should apologize than!
Master Sword: Well. That'll be kinda hard, cause.. I shot him..
Twilight: Great... So what now.
Master Sword: Well. Looks like I better save Christmas..
Twilight: wewe can't be serious!?
Master Sword: I don't see any other opinion..
Twilight: ... wewe planned this, didn't you!?
Master sword: Whaaaaat!? No!
Twilight: wewe planned this! I know wewe did!
Master Sword: wewe honestly think I wou-
Spike: (comes out, in elf costume) hujambo Sword. The sled is ready, an. (sees twilight). Uh oh..
(long pause).
Master Sword: wewe would not believe how cheap that elf costume was.
Twilight: (starts growling)
Master Sword: (happily) I aliiba it.
Twilight: SWOOO-
Master Sword: LET ME HAVE MY NIGHTMARE BEFORE krisimasi MOMENT!!
#6:
Loud police voice: GET DOWN ON THE GROUND ASSHOLE! (Saten freaks out and hides on the ground surrendering) I'LL SHOOT YOUR LEGS OFF!
Master Sword: (comes into view, driving police car). Hahaha! Gotcha.. Naw, it's just me.
Saten: Sword? wewe scared th- Oh shit, did wewe steal cop car!?.. That's crazy!
Master Sword: No, what's crazy. Is leaving it unintended, anyone cold of aliiba it.. Prove.. I did!
Saten: But dude! wewe can't steal police cars! wewe know how illage that is!?
Master Sword: Pffffft, who will pull over a police car.
Saten: I- ... Wow., your actually right.
Master Sword: Have I ever NOT been right?
(shows an image of Saten about to be lite from a powerful kanuni, cannon in a very dangerious and unprofessional way, and Master Sword giving him thumbs up, as it was Master Sword's idea).
#7:
Radio: Car 53, we're wewe heading in such a hurry?
Master Sword: oh shit that's us.. Uhhh... There's uh., bank robbery.
Radio: There's a bank robbery!?
Master Sword: Yes, we're.. We're heading their now! (turns on the Sirons and starts speeding).
Saten: Dude, we're are wewe going!?
Master Sword: Didn't wewe hear, theirs a bank robbery!
Saten: What!? No theirs not-
Master Sword: PROTECT AND SERVE MOTHER FU-
(They burst into bank)
Master Sword: YOUR BEING ROBBED! (Points gun at employee) WERE'S YOUR MONEY!
Employee: (crying) p, please don't kill me!
Master Sword: (dramatically) please don't MAKE ME!
(Sword and Saten arrive into the back of the bank)
Saten: Dude, what are wewe doing!?
Master Sword: No talk! We gotta take all this cash!
Saten: Soooo, nobody can steal it?
Master Sword: ... Yeah!
Saten: Hmm , Good idea (starts grabbing money bags)
#8:
Derpy: I really messed up on those invitations! I feel just awful!
Master Sword: Why'd wewe bring me to Cake N' bacon for our third date, I HATE this place!
Derpy: I told Cranky I could get 'em printed for cheap, but that meant hiring somebody with no experience using a printing press... Oh, I wish there was a way I could go back in time and fix all this.
Sword: To prove my hatred of this place, I'm gonna leave a lousy tip...under fifteen percent!... And then I'll send my meal back, even though it's EXACTLY what I ordered!
Derpy: Is it possible were having two different conversations?
Sword: How should I know, I'm not listening to you!
#9:
Master Sword: (showing snake to high school students) And the most I know about this species is that i- (suddenly the bites his arm) AHH! FUCK!
Students: (turn quite)
Master Sword: (pulls the snake off angrily) GOD FUCKIN DAMN IT! Fuckin son of a, FUCK!
Audience: (gasps)
Master Sword: Oh, the fucking stupid-ass serpent BIT ME!
Principle: Mr Sword, please sto-
Master Sword: Oh, jam, jamu a lit sparkler up my asshole and then do sit-ups. lt hurts so bad!
Principle: Sir! Words like that are NOT allowed in this school!
Master Sword: (screaming) MOTHER FUCKER BIT ME!... (calmly) I.. I mean the snake bit me... I think I need a hospital.
#10:
Master Sword: I've been waiting for this all year.. (pulls out the turkey) Giving wewe people the bird.
Saten: Oh.. (hand goes to the turkey) Looks so go- AH! SHIT!
Sword: (stabbed the hand with large fork) Neh uh.. Not til we say grace.
#11:
Sword: Tonight, wewe become a man.
pink Pony: But I'm a girl.
Sword: A MAN!!
#12:
Saten: I hate to tell wewe this Sword, but there really is no Santa.
Sword: ... (chuckles) That's funny.. I thought wewe alisema Santa wasn't real.. What's next, hmm? . Um, who else isn't real? Hmm? Y...You gonna tell me Elmo isn't real? au SpongeBob? Is he not real? Is SpongeBob not there at the bottom of the ocean giving Squidward the business? Hmm? And what about Curious George? Huh? Does he not really exist? Hmm? Is Curious George not out there makin' little boats out of newspapers that he should be delivering? Huh? Educate yourself, wewe fool!
#13:
Saten: Why'd we take his leg?
Sword: We're in their country, Saten, we have to observe their customs. (drops leg on bump)
Sword: ... Well, at least we're done with the first leg of our journey.
#14:
Sword: hujambo dude, that one reindeer just kind of pooped in the other reindeer's face, and the other reindeer just kind of ate it. Isn't krisimasi magical?
Mastersword as an interviewer: hujambo princess Twilight. Good having wewe here.
Twilight: Sure.
Sword: First off. How dose it feel being the forth princess ever?
Twilight: (barely even lessoning) Yes. I wouldn't be here without my friends.
Sword: That's nice. But the swali is, how dose it make 'you' feel. YOU!?
Twilight: (still barely lessoning) Yes. That is diffently a swali being asked. And I'm confident in my friends. And getting it done.
Sword: Okay.. Have to be honest with you. I feel like this interview. Is going absolutely nowhere. wewe answered 'none' of my questions. wewe kinda sound like a broken automatic response system, that's only been tought 4 phrases.
Twilight: (not lessening) Thanks. It's been an experience.
Sword: *annoyed* Yeah it has!
Twilight: *listing stuff about friendship*
Sword: What are yo- *looks behind him* Are wewe kusoma cue cards wait now!?.. What is this!?
Twilight: *still kusoma off them*
Sword: (proving point to audience) What's your name lady!?
Twilight: .. Dedication.
Sword: (angrily to camera) Her name is dedication!
#2:
Derpy: Saten. He's not even as dorky as wewe say he is.
Sword: Wha-
Saten: Well.. I still loved pranking him anyway.
Derpy: (laughs) wewe did?..
Saten: Yes.. I remember I use to put fibreglass shards in his gym shorts. Every time he had to take a pee. He'd come back crying. *Saten and Derpy laugh*
Sword: It wasn't funny. It was painful.. Wasn't so much the fiber. As it was the glass!.. I had to get a urethra transplant.. And those are COSTLY!
Sword: wewe should hear his zaidi hivi karibuni ones.. (to Saten) Tell her what wewe did a the other day.
Saten: Well.. I mailed a wild hog to house the other day.
Sword: (angrily) THERE'S GIANT PIG WITH HORNS! LIVING IN THE BASEMENT!
Saten: Plus.. The time before that. We were suppose to have a sleepover at his house., I was planning to sneak laxatives into his cereal.. But the sleep over got canceled so I couldn't get him with that one.
Derpy: Ohh... But the idea was still there.
Saten: Oh! Differently (they highfive)
Sword: (arrogantly) HE DIDN'T GET ME THOUGH! He didn't get me... DidyougetmeSaten? Didyougetme!?
Satan: No-
Sword: No! wewe did not get me!.. Who didn't get me... Saten Twist.
Saten: wewe know what.. Fuck it.. Fine. wewe guys can go out.. But only once.
Sword: Good enough. *leaves*
Sword: Alright Derpy.. Let's go.
Derpy: Fine.
Sword: Just remember one thing tonight. One thing.. Your cousin did NOT get me with poop thing..
#3:
Master Sword: (hiding behind wall) Come on. Come on.
Saten: (walks in) Excuse me I-
Sword: (tackles him and start violently beating him up)... (stops).. Sorry. (pants). I thought wewe were the mafia.
Saten: N No I'm Saten Twist.
Sword: Who?
Saten: I've been asked to interview you.
Sword: Interview!?. (eyes narrow) Well. wewe can't interview a dead man now CAN YOU! (jumps out the four story window, and ends up going into ambulance, and he waves evily to Saten, as Saten watches him get lifted into the ambulance).
#4:
Iron will: Welcome. To Iron wills onyesha on being assertive.. Here's how being assertive works. wewe take down who's bigger then you.. Example. Who's the toughest gppony, pony in the crowd?
Sword: (there with Fluttershy) Well. I don't mean to toot my own horn, but I believe I hold the extinction o- (gets grabbed kwa Iron will and gets violently beaten up from off view).
Iron Will: Alright. Know who's the funniest?
Sword: I know my way around a jo- (starts getting beat up again).
#5:
Twilight: (sleeping soundly).. (she is suddenly awaken kwa a loud gunshot) WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT!? (runs done stairs, and suddenly gasps)..
Master Sword: (holding pistol, and Santa Clause is seen laying dead from a bullet though his head).. (groans). Before wewe start.
Twilight: Jesus christ!
Master Sword: (annoyedly) Okay! Before, you, start!
Twilight: holly SHIT!
Master Sword: (annoyed) wewe gonna let me explain!?
Twilight: (angry) Yes Sword! I would upendo to know why wewe shot and killed, FATHER CHRISTMAS!
Master Sword: ... He startled me!
Twilight: (annoyed) HE STARTLED YOU!?
Master Sword: He! Startled me!
Twilight: (sarcastically) Oh, guess he should apologize than!
Master Sword: Well. That'll be kinda hard, cause.. I shot him..
Twilight: Great... So what now.
Master Sword: Well. Looks like I better save Christmas..
Twilight: wewe can't be serious!?
Master Sword: I don't see any other opinion..
Twilight: ... wewe planned this, didn't you!?
Master sword: Whaaaaat!? No!
Twilight: wewe planned this! I know wewe did!
Master Sword: wewe honestly think I wou-
Spike: (comes out, in elf costume) hujambo Sword. The sled is ready, an. (sees twilight). Uh oh..
(long pause).
Master Sword: wewe would not believe how cheap that elf costume was.
Twilight: (starts growling)
Master Sword: (happily) I aliiba it.
Twilight: SWOOO-
Master Sword: LET ME HAVE MY NIGHTMARE BEFORE krisimasi MOMENT!!
#6:
Loud police voice: GET DOWN ON THE GROUND ASSHOLE! (Saten freaks out and hides on the ground surrendering) I'LL SHOOT YOUR LEGS OFF!
Master Sword: (comes into view, driving police car). Hahaha! Gotcha.. Naw, it's just me.
Saten: Sword? wewe scared th- Oh shit, did wewe steal cop car!?.. That's crazy!
Master Sword: No, what's crazy. Is leaving it unintended, anyone cold of aliiba it.. Prove.. I did!
Saten: But dude! wewe can't steal police cars! wewe know how illage that is!?
Master Sword: Pffffft, who will pull over a police car.
Saten: I- ... Wow., your actually right.
Master Sword: Have I ever NOT been right?
(shows an image of Saten about to be lite from a powerful kanuni, cannon in a very dangerious and unprofessional way, and Master Sword giving him thumbs up, as it was Master Sword's idea).
#7:
Radio: Car 53, we're wewe heading in such a hurry?
Master Sword: oh shit that's us.. Uhhh... There's uh., bank robbery.
Radio: There's a bank robbery!?
Master Sword: Yes, we're.. We're heading their now! (turns on the Sirons and starts speeding).
Saten: Dude, we're are wewe going!?
Master Sword: Didn't wewe hear, theirs a bank robbery!
Saten: What!? No theirs not-
Master Sword: PROTECT AND SERVE MOTHER FU-
(They burst into bank)
Master Sword: YOUR BEING ROBBED! (Points gun at employee) WERE'S YOUR MONEY!
Employee: (crying) p, please don't kill me!
Master Sword: (dramatically) please don't MAKE ME!
(Sword and Saten arrive into the back of the bank)
Saten: Dude, what are wewe doing!?
Master Sword: No talk! We gotta take all this cash!
Saten: Soooo, nobody can steal it?
Master Sword: ... Yeah!
Saten: Hmm , Good idea (starts grabbing money bags)
#8:
Derpy: I really messed up on those invitations! I feel just awful!
Master Sword: Why'd wewe bring me to Cake N' bacon for our third date, I HATE this place!
Derpy: I told Cranky I could get 'em printed for cheap, but that meant hiring somebody with no experience using a printing press... Oh, I wish there was a way I could go back in time and fix all this.
Sword: To prove my hatred of this place, I'm gonna leave a lousy tip...under fifteen percent!... And then I'll send my meal back, even though it's EXACTLY what I ordered!
Derpy: Is it possible were having two different conversations?
Sword: How should I know, I'm not listening to you!
#9:
Master Sword: (showing snake to high school students) And the most I know about this species is that i- (suddenly the bites his arm) AHH! FUCK!
Students: (turn quite)
Master Sword: (pulls the snake off angrily) GOD FUCKIN DAMN IT! Fuckin son of a, FUCK!
Audience: (gasps)
Master Sword: Oh, the fucking stupid-ass serpent BIT ME!
Principle: Mr Sword, please sto-
Master Sword: Oh, jam, jamu a lit sparkler up my asshole and then do sit-ups. lt hurts so bad!
Principle: Sir! Words like that are NOT allowed in this school!
Master Sword: (screaming) MOTHER FUCKER BIT ME!... (calmly) I.. I mean the snake bit me... I think I need a hospital.
#10:
Master Sword: I've been waiting for this all year.. (pulls out the turkey) Giving wewe people the bird.
Saten: Oh.. (hand goes to the turkey) Looks so go- AH! SHIT!
Sword: (stabbed the hand with large fork) Neh uh.. Not til we say grace.
#11:
Sword: Tonight, wewe become a man.
pink Pony: But I'm a girl.
Sword: A MAN!!
#12:
Saten: I hate to tell wewe this Sword, but there really is no Santa.
Sword: ... (chuckles) That's funny.. I thought wewe alisema Santa wasn't real.. What's next, hmm? . Um, who else isn't real? Hmm? Y...You gonna tell me Elmo isn't real? au SpongeBob? Is he not real? Is SpongeBob not there at the bottom of the ocean giving Squidward the business? Hmm? And what about Curious George? Huh? Does he not really exist? Hmm? Is Curious George not out there makin' little boats out of newspapers that he should be delivering? Huh? Educate yourself, wewe fool!
#13:
Saten: Why'd we take his leg?
Sword: We're in their country, Saten, we have to observe their customs. (drops leg on bump)
Sword: ... Well, at least we're done with the first leg of our journey.
#14:
Sword: hujambo dude, that one reindeer just kind of pooped in the other reindeer's face, and the other reindeer just kind of ate it. Isn't krisimasi magical?
So I have gotten a request from WindWaker430.. Review Adam Standler movies..
Well, least he's not making me watch Sebian Film again..
I suppose I could do this.. I like Adam Standler.. And thankfully, I don't have to review 12 Crazy Nights. Wind is gonna do that one.. Cause if I have to sit though 12 Angry Nights. Than deal off..
I still remember Grown Ups when first came out.. When I saw Adam Standler, Kevin James, Chris Rock, and David Spade, all in the cover. I was excited.. Not ironically.. I really was excited to see this movie.
So of coarse, my only reason to see that movie was to...
continue reading...
Well, least he's not making me watch Sebian Film again..
I suppose I could do this.. I like Adam Standler.. And thankfully, I don't have to review 12 Crazy Nights. Wind is gonna do that one.. Cause if I have to sit though 12 Angry Nights. Than deal off..
I still remember Grown Ups when first came out.. When I saw Adam Standler, Kevin James, Chris Rock, and David Spade, all in the cover. I was excited.. Not ironically.. I really was excited to see this movie.
So of coarse, my only reason to see that movie was to...
#1: FRIDAY THE 13th, ORGINAL:
I just don't get how THAT gave us Jason Voorhees.. It's so stupid.
#2: KILL BILL:
It's weird.. I just always found this movie TOO action-y.. I don't know if it's Uma Thurman.. The over acting.. The subtitles.. au just that I had to sit though it over a thousand times..
Either way.. I'll put this movie lower on this, but it's the quickest I could think of.
#3: SAW 3D:
This is when the series became that torture porn wewe THINK the series started as.. It's stupid.. The movie is stupid.
#4: RESIDENT EVIL:
No thank you..
#5: REVENANT:
Let me clarify.. I DO like this movie.. But I mainly just watch the first half, rarely the sekunde half.
But still.. Leonardo literary had to eat raw meat, crawl in the snow, and get ravaged kwa a CGI grizzly, to finally get that damn oscar..
I just don't get how THAT gave us Jason Voorhees.. It's so stupid.
#2: KILL BILL:
It's weird.. I just always found this movie TOO action-y.. I don't know if it's Uma Thurman.. The over acting.. The subtitles.. au just that I had to sit though it over a thousand times..
Either way.. I'll put this movie lower on this, but it's the quickest I could think of.
#3: SAW 3D:
This is when the series became that torture porn wewe THINK the series started as.. It's stupid.. The movie is stupid.
#4: RESIDENT EVIL:
No thank you..
#5: REVENANT:
Let me clarify.. I DO like this movie.. But I mainly just watch the first half, rarely the sekunde half.
But still.. Leonardo literary had to eat raw meat, crawl in the snow, and get ravaged kwa a CGI grizzly, to finally get that damn oscar..
