Announcer (spoken)
Ladies and gentlemen, Miss Velma Kelly in an act of desperation.
Velma (sings)
My sister and I had an act that couldn't flop.
My sister and I were headed straight for the top.
My sister and I earned a though a week, at least, oh yeah!
But my sister is now, unfortunately, deceased.
I know it's sad of course, but a fact, is still a fact!
And now all that remains, is the remains, of a perfect-double-act!
Velma (spoken)
Watch this!
We have to imagine it with two people-it's swell with two people!
Velma (sings)
First I'd...
Then she'd...
Then we'd...
But I can't do it alone!
Then she'd...
Then I'd...
Then we'd...
But I can't do it alone!
She'd say, "What's your sister like?"
I'd say, "Men!"
She'd say, "You're the cat's meow!"
And we'd wow the crowd again!
When she'd go...
I'd go...
We'd go...
Then those ding-dong daddies started a roar, whistled, stomped, banged on the floor, yelling, screaming, begging for
moooooore...!
And we'd say,"Ok, fellas, keep your socks up-'cause wewe ain't seen NOTHING yet!"
But I simply cannot do it...aaaloooooone...!
Velma (spoken)
So what do wewe think, huh? Come on... wewe can say.
Roxie (spits her tongue at her)
Prrrt...!
Velma (spoken)
I know, you're right, the first part's shit. But the sekunde part? The sekunde part is REALLY nifty!
Ok!
Velma (sings)
She'd go...
I'd go...
We'd go...
And then those two-bit Johnnys did it up brown, to cheer the best attraction in town, they nearly tore the balcony
doooooown...!
And we'd say, "Ok, boys, we're going home! But before we go, there's a few zaidi parting shots! And this, this, we did in
PERFECT UNISON!"
Now ya see me going through it!
wewe may think there's nothing to it!
But I simply cannot do it...aloooooone...!
Ladies and gentlemen, Miss Velma Kelly in an act of desperation.
Velma (sings)
My sister and I had an act that couldn't flop.
My sister and I were headed straight for the top.
My sister and I earned a though a week, at least, oh yeah!
But my sister is now, unfortunately, deceased.
I know it's sad of course, but a fact, is still a fact!
And now all that remains, is the remains, of a perfect-double-act!
Velma (spoken)
Watch this!
We have to imagine it with two people-it's swell with two people!
Velma (sings)
First I'd...
Then she'd...
Then we'd...
But I can't do it alone!
Then she'd...
Then I'd...
Then we'd...
But I can't do it alone!
She'd say, "What's your sister like?"
I'd say, "Men!"
She'd say, "You're the cat's meow!"
And we'd wow the crowd again!
When she'd go...
I'd go...
We'd go...
Then those ding-dong daddies started a roar, whistled, stomped, banged on the floor, yelling, screaming, begging for
moooooore...!
And we'd say,"Ok, fellas, keep your socks up-'cause wewe ain't seen NOTHING yet!"
But I simply cannot do it...aaaloooooone...!
Velma (spoken)
So what do wewe think, huh? Come on... wewe can say.
Roxie (spits her tongue at her)
Prrrt...!
Velma (spoken)
I know, you're right, the first part's shit. But the sekunde part? The sekunde part is REALLY nifty!
Ok!
Velma (sings)
She'd go...
I'd go...
We'd go...
And then those two-bit Johnnys did it up brown, to cheer the best attraction in town, they nearly tore the balcony
doooooown...!
And we'd say, "Ok, boys, we're going home! But before we go, there's a few zaidi parting shots! And this, this, we did in
PERFECT UNISON!"
Now ya see me going through it!
wewe may think there's nothing to it!
But I simply cannot do it...aloooooone...!
MARY SUNSHINE]
When I was a tiny tot
Of maybe two au three
I can still remember what
My mother alisema to me...
Place rose colored glasses on your nose
And wewe will see the robins
Not the crows
for in this tense and Tangled web
Our weary lives may weave
you're so much better off
if wewe believe...
That there's a little bit of good
In everyone
In everyone you'll ever know
Yes, there's a little bit of good
In everyone
Though many times, it doesn't show
It only takes the taking time
With one another
For under every mean veneer
Is someone warm and dear
Keep looking...
for that bit of good in everyone
The ones we call bad
Are never all bad
So try to find that little bit of good!
Just a little, little bit of good
Is someone warm and dear
Keep looking...
For that little good in everyone
Although wewe meet rats
They're not complete rats
So try to find that little bit of good!
When I was a tiny tot
Of maybe two au three
I can still remember what
My mother alisema to me...
Place rose colored glasses on your nose
And wewe will see the robins
Not the crows
for in this tense and Tangled web
Our weary lives may weave
you're so much better off
if wewe believe...
That there's a little bit of good
In everyone
In everyone you'll ever know
Yes, there's a little bit of good
In everyone
Though many times, it doesn't show
It only takes the taking time
With one another
For under every mean veneer
Is someone warm and dear
Keep looking...
for that bit of good in everyone
The ones we call bad
Are never all bad
So try to find that little bit of good!
Just a little, little bit of good
Is someone warm and dear
Keep looking...
For that little good in everyone
Although wewe meet rats
They're not complete rats
So try to find that little bit of good!
Renee Zellweger, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Taye Diggs - Nowadays/Hot Honey Rag
Ladies and Gentlemen, the Chicago Theater is proud to announce a first.
The first time, anywhere there's been an act of this nature.
Not only one little lady, but two!
You've read about them in the papers and now here they are!
Chicago's own killer dillers
those scintillating sinners
Roxie Hart and Velma Kelly!
Roxie and Velma:
wewe can like the life you're living
wewe can live the life wewe like
wewe can even marry Harry
But mess around with Ike
And that's
Good, isn't it?
Grand, isn't it?
Great, isn't it?
Swell, isn't it?
Fun, isn't it?
But nothing stays
In fifty years au so
It's gonna change, wewe know
But, oh, it's heaven
Nowadays
ANNOUNCER
Okay, wewe babes of jazz. Let's pick up the pace.
Let's make the parties longer.
Let's make the skirts shorter.
Let's all go to hell in a fast car and KEEP IT HOT!
Roxie and Velma:
And all that Jazz!
Ladies and Gentlemen, the Chicago Theater is proud to announce a first.
The first time, anywhere there's been an act of this nature.
Not only one little lady, but two!
You've read about them in the papers and now here they are!
Chicago's own killer dillers
those scintillating sinners
Roxie Hart and Velma Kelly!
Roxie and Velma:
wewe can like the life you're living
wewe can live the life wewe like
wewe can even marry Harry
But mess around with Ike
And that's
Good, isn't it?
Grand, isn't it?
Great, isn't it?
Swell, isn't it?
Fun, isn't it?
But nothing stays
In fifty years au so
It's gonna change, wewe know
But, oh, it's heaven
Nowadays
ANNOUNCER
Okay, wewe babes of jazz. Let's pick up the pace.
Let's make the parties longer.
Let's make the skirts shorter.
Let's all go to hell in a fast car and KEEP IT HOT!
Roxie and Velma:
And all that Jazz!