“After you, Jenny,” he said, that smile gracing his lips in his certain little childish way. She made a face at him and resisted the urge to knee him in the groin with her heel as she climbed inside the car and his hand rested on her lower back. Jethro would never hurt her, why did she want to hurt him? “Salem, honey, hurry up,” she called, watching her daughter stop to play in the puddle from the heavy rain earlier. It seemed like it might rain again at any moment, and Jenny just wanted to get nyumbani before that happened.

If she'd known that that would be the last puddle Salem would ever see, she might have slowed her role just a bit.

Gibbs climbed in behind her and Jenny worried with the stain on her skirt. Apparently it was amusing to her lover, but when he laughed she made another face at him. That shut him up pretty quick. Salem babbled on and on about her little ponies she'd left in her mother's new office, saying that they'd be cold and scared alone up there all night. “Baby, they'll be alright. They're not kwa themselves, they've got each other,” she whispered, trying to sound as lighthearted as she could. She didn't want her daughter to think she was annoyed with her. She was just.. tired. And it was obviously noticeable because she felt Jethro's gaze upon her. It was unnerving, really. She side-glanced at him, giving the smallest of smiles, and the jabbered on about what she'd do with Salem's hair when they got home. Did she want braids? Did she want a gppony, pony tail? Anything to keep her mind off Jethro. She felt his lips press to the side of her head almost cautiously and she inwardly winced. What was wrong with her? Why did she not want to be touched? Her eyes glinted briefly as she looked up to him, quiet, studying. And then she quickly looked back to their little girl. Then she heard the worst possible thing wewe could hear on a dark, rainy night on this curvy road. “Fuck!” Brian yelled.

Everything happened too quickly for her to really understand.

Jenny looked up to see bright headlights shining in her eyes; she heard the squealing tires of the car as they tried to grip traction on the wet road. Then she heard the crunch of the metal of the car as it wrapped around an old oak tree. Her head slammed against the glass of her door and her body immediately went limp. Salem's tiny figure was jerked around like a rag doll, thrown into the floor of the car with shards of glass and other fragments of the car. Jethro slid away from his door towards Jenny and Salem, appearing as if he was trying to shield them from anything he could. No kiti, kiti cha ukanda on for young Salem. But if she'd been wearing one, and her father too, Jethro might have broken most every bone in his body against the force of the impact. Brian.. was dead. There was nothing to be done, nothing anyone could have done. Gibbs blinked awake first with a migraine from hell, his eyes resting on the cracked window and the mixture red hair and red blood across Jenny's face. No, no, no! Salem. Where was Salem? He looked around, the bright red hair – just like her mother's – against the blackness that was the floorboard of that car. Still, unmoving. Jethro's breathing hitched as his arms moved to grip his daughter's body carefully, pulling it off the floor and between him and Jenny. His arm complained as he reached over to grip the door handle and he gritted his teeth against the pain. It was jammed. The fucking door was jammed. He growled and raised his leg up, kicking at it almost desperately. He managed to break the already-damaged glass out an reached his arm over the razor-sharp edges to grip the handle and try to tug it open. After a few tries it came free, and he positioned his daughter over her mother and tugged them out at the same time, moving to a clear space and laid them down.

That's when he realized Jenny wasn't breathing.

Jethro's fingers brushed the hair from her face, her body limp. He couldn't loose her, not again. Not for.. good. He tilted her head back like they'd taught him in that damn class over and over, listening to see if he was just overreacting. “Jenny..” he choked out, starting compressions. After thirty he put his mouth over hers, breathing as normally as he could. Loose her? Loose Salem? What the hell would he have left? Nothing. He'd have nothing; no reason to live, just memories that would hurt like fuck. Gibbs probably did it longer than he should have, but he refused to give up on her. He refused to be reduced to that blithering mess he knew he would be if she left him. And then she coughed, her entire body shaking, and he moved back, letting her come back as she would. “Jeth-thro.. Salem..?” weak voice as it was, it was still hers. His eyes flickered to his daughter who was still lifeless. Fuck. He scrambled over to her and checked her pulse, which was steady, and though her breathing was slow, it was still there, plain as day. He fumbled through his pockets for his phone, amazed that it hadn't been Lost in the crash. He dialed, moving back over to Jen and running a hand over her hair, urging her to be still. “I need help. Old Mill road, east end. Car crash. Ambulance. Now.” He could barely get out sentence fragments. Gibbs looked to the car, a moto starting under the hood. He glanced back around to see the other car run off the road, the kids piling out of it and staring dumbly at the car he'd come from, undoubtedly drunk. “Jethro.” He looked back to her, protest in his gaze as she moved to look at Salem. “W..why isn't she awake, Jethro?” she asked, looking back to him, hoping he had an answer. He opened his mouth but no words would come out, nothing. All he could do was watch helplessly as tears began to fall from his lover's beautiful eyes.

________

Jethro stood inayofuata to the wall, his eyes fixed upon his daughter as she lay still motionless in the bed. The doctor he knew well, but he saw no flicker of good news to come in his eyes as he clasped his hand on his good shoulder. “I'm sorry, Gibbs.. she's brain dead. She won't wake up.” Jethro wanted it to be a joke, wanted this man he'd known for so long to have developed a cruel and sick twisted sense of humor, but he knew that it wasn't the case. Salem would never wake. He would never see those vibrant eyes au dashing smile, he'd never watch while she and Jen slept on the kitanda late at night. His daughter.. was as good as dead. “Where's Jen?” He looked at the door sub consciously, hoping she wasn't there, and feeling an epic sense of relief when she wasn't. Gibbs looked back to the doctor, then at the floor, and then back to him. “Don't tell her, let me. I can't afford a lawsuit if she slaps you,” he said, his attempt at humor dry and lifeless. The man nodded and squeezed his shoulder in a reassuring way, and then looked at Salem before shaking his head and exiting the room. He stood as he had been before until she moved into the room, bruised and cut up and hurting, though she'd never say such a thing. He moved over to her, touching her shoulder lightly with his hand that wasn't in the cast. “Did the doctor say anything?” she asked, hope heavily laced within her words. He looked at her hand, took it, and then looked back to her eyes. So bright, so needing. She wanted good news, wanted to know everything would be alright. Why did it have to be horrible news that he had to deliver? What had Jen ever done that would justify taking away her daughter after taking away her first? “Jenny.. Salem's not going to wake up,” he whispered, barely moving his lips. The light faded from her eyes and her mouth dropped open slightly, and then she shoved him back. “How can wewe say that to me, goddammit!” she screamed, beginning to cry again. She turned back to the kitanda and took her little girl's hand, squeezing lightly. “Salem.. baby, wake up for momma. Salem.. p-please..” her voice began to falter, and she collapsed to her knees on the floor, her head dropping. He moved to comfort her if he could, his touch so delicate and fragile that it was almost pathetic. She shoved him away. Hurt brewed in his gut as he backed away, as he watched her body shake as she sobbed.

“I Lost her too, Jenny.” he alisema softly, and he grimaced at the hard gaze she gave him. Fire, daggers, hate. “You didn't fucking carry her in your body! Hell, wewe barely know her!” she growled, and then she realized what she'd just said. His face went blank and he moved to the window, looking out it without really seeing. “Jethro..” she pleaded, standing up and moving over to him, still crying. She didn't dare touch him. “I'm sorry.. I.. I didn't mean that..” she choked, sinking to the ground and curling her knees to her chest and rocking back and forth.

“I want to take her place.” she managed to choke.