Waiting
Silent
Sitting
Thinking
Hearing screaming
But not actually listening
Trying to numb my mind
My thoughts
“You lied “
“You always lie”
“How can I trust you?”
But leaving them behind
So my mind can be alone
Still hearing voices
That’s when I yell back
“I had to”
“You never let me do anything”
“you are over protected”
Hearing the tears and the strain in my voice
Listening in silence as he yells louder
“You’re a lyer”
“That’s why wewe can’t, I can’t trust you”
Crying
Feeling all the pressure on my eyes
Feeling worthless
Horrible awful
Walking
Running
lying down
Hiding my head
Crying in frustration
Fading
Far away
Distancing myself
Sleeping
Leaving my thoughts far away
Dragging
Myself out of kitanda
Moving my feet
Dragging along to the jikoni
Hearing laughter
And talking
Watching him try to hug me
Backing away
I realize i am forgiven
But I am not satisfied
It is not enough
It is never enough
Sorry is overused
I hate it
It is too late
I listen to him joke
Throwing those stupid
Hurtful
Remarks at wewe
Tears well up
But wewe can’t tell him
He will make it a joke
Always a stupid Joke
I hate it
But I stay
I have too
I stay until
Our fights come back
Till they come back to haunt me
To eat me up
Why don’t I tell him?
But I can’t
Through everything though
I upendo him
I always will
So I stay
Waiting for him
To come nyumbani again
Silent
Sitting
Thinking
Hearing screaming
But not actually listening
Trying to numb my mind
My thoughts
“You lied “
“You always lie”
“How can I trust you?”
But leaving them behind
So my mind can be alone
Still hearing voices
That’s when I yell back
“I had to”
“You never let me do anything”
“you are over protected”
Hearing the tears and the strain in my voice
Listening in silence as he yells louder
“You’re a lyer”
“That’s why wewe can’t, I can’t trust you”
Crying
Feeling all the pressure on my eyes
Feeling worthless
Horrible awful
Walking
Running
lying down
Hiding my head
Crying in frustration
Fading
Far away
Distancing myself
Sleeping
Leaving my thoughts far away
Dragging
Myself out of kitanda
Moving my feet
Dragging along to the jikoni
Hearing laughter
And talking
Watching him try to hug me
Backing away
I realize i am forgiven
But I am not satisfied
It is not enough
It is never enough
Sorry is overused
I hate it
It is too late
I listen to him joke
Throwing those stupid
Hurtful
Remarks at wewe
Tears well up
But wewe can’t tell him
He will make it a joke
Always a stupid Joke
I hate it
But I stay
I have too
I stay until
Our fights come back
Till they come back to haunt me
To eat me up
Why don’t I tell him?
But I can’t
Through everything though
I upendo him
I always will
So I stay
Waiting for him
To come nyumbani again
Black widowed tarantula sized evil
Nurtures her children well
As they all take a bite out of human flesh
Watching them choke on their own blood
All little teeny tiny beady black eyes stare
At the chakula they see
They smell a human female
They'll have to take their bite
Poison scares the snakes that try to devour their mother's eggs
The snake drops dead after seeing the mother
Realizing that they're not bird's eggs
The children see their awful mother
Mean and cruel
Evil and heartless
At least cold and black hearted people have hearts
The children get sick of their mother's evil
So soon they prepare to defeat
The evil that lies beneath a thorax and eight legs
To them this is a Victorious fight
They look at their evil mother
They see what evil holds
They look at her and then they devour her
After kusoma about this
Little Carrie White looked at her own evil mother
Realizing with her abilities, she can do the same thing.
Nurtures her children well
As they all take a bite out of human flesh
Watching them choke on their own blood
All little teeny tiny beady black eyes stare
At the chakula they see
They smell a human female
They'll have to take their bite
Poison scares the snakes that try to devour their mother's eggs
The snake drops dead after seeing the mother
Realizing that they're not bird's eggs
The children see their awful mother
Mean and cruel
Evil and heartless
At least cold and black hearted people have hearts
The children get sick of their mother's evil
So soon they prepare to defeat
The evil that lies beneath a thorax and eight legs
To them this is a Victorious fight
They look at their evil mother
They see what evil holds
They look at her and then they devour her
After kusoma about this
Little Carrie White looked at her own evil mother
Realizing with her abilities, she can do the same thing.
so that wewe can be light
I am dull
so that u can be bright
I am evil
so that wewe can be good
I was bad
Coz i thought the world would.....
world would praise me
Who helped wewe to climb upto there
but I never thought
the fame wewe got wewe don't want to share
My eyes looked at wewe last time
And as i turned back, a tear fell apart my eyes
On the way i thought
For wewe I spoke so many lies now its my time to rise
I know i was evil servant of heaven
Late in night I heard some stupid bell
I saw people of hell were fighting to be king, i too jumped in that
and inayofuata day..... inayofuata siku I woke up as the King of Hell..
Flying softly on beams of moonlight
Floating softly on beams of light, tonight
Hearing fragments of distant conversations
Swiftly drifting over nations
Moonlight reflecting on his wings
The kengele of a distant chapel rings
Then he descends to the earth
What, to him, is life worth?
Through an open window he flies
Waiting for the surprise
In he flies on moonlight wings
His bow of death, he strings
He aims, he shoots
This he does with all his recruits
The arrow hits its spot
The horse of death is in its trot
His new recruit slowly wakes
This man's new eyes staring like snakes
The angle jumps through the window which he came
Perfectly leaps, doesn't touch the frame
He flies away on moonlit wings
He flies away on moonlit wings
Floating softly on beams of light, tonight
Hearing fragments of distant conversations
Swiftly drifting over nations
Moonlight reflecting on his wings
The kengele of a distant chapel rings
Then he descends to the earth
What, to him, is life worth?
Through an open window he flies
Waiting for the surprise
In he flies on moonlight wings
His bow of death, he strings
He aims, he shoots
This he does with all his recruits
The arrow hits its spot
The horse of death is in its trot
His new recruit slowly wakes
This man's new eyes staring like snakes
The angle jumps through the window which he came
Perfectly leaps, doesn't touch the frame
He flies away on moonlit wings
He flies away on moonlit wings
I saw U passed Me,,,,with ur girl..
I never have an eyes on U
never thought that we'll meet one day..
as time brought u to my side
Now,,,
something change
We've been cheat them
we now it was wrong
either we can't stop...
just keep walk on it
Then be quite
KISS me,my Forbidden
say to me that it is not fiction
prove to me that it's not a runaway feeling
Im Here...
u're here
not with HIm,,,or Her...
I Know It Is wrong
U know It is Sin,,
But either Csn't Stop..
How desires Flows..
How KISS flies among Us,,
and We keep walked,,,then Be quite,Boy
I never have an eyes on U
never thought that we'll meet one day..
as time brought u to my side
Now,,,
something change
We've been cheat them
we now it was wrong
either we can't stop...
just keep walk on it
Then be quite
KISS me,my Forbidden
say to me that it is not fiction
prove to me that it's not a runaway feeling
Im Here...
u're here
not with HIm,,,or Her...
I Know It Is wrong
U know It is Sin,,
But either Csn't Stop..
How desires Flows..
How KISS flies among Us,,
and We keep walked,,,then Be quite,Boy
One siku wouldn't shows the future,,,
one kiss doesn't prove the real
it doesn't shows in a second...
and rounded here,,,with all the things we've argue
and now I realized that
The Arms are the same
The one which Hugs ur moyo into the warmth,,
the same which Pulled u down with pain...
u'll never understand when,,,or how it happened..
But I now it is real..
u keep me high while I try to upendo ur Blind sides
But then U throw me falling away to reality,,,
pain,,,,hurts,,,,damn night...tears..are here....
I Can Do Nothing,,,
Kiss that takes me to the sky,,,
has the same to give me enormous words filled with hate
how u call it??
hate?
Faith??????
either do we understands...
this is starting over
one kiss doesn't prove the real
it doesn't shows in a second...
and rounded here,,,with all the things we've argue
and now I realized that
The Arms are the same
The one which Hugs ur moyo into the warmth,,
the same which Pulled u down with pain...
u'll never understand when,,,or how it happened..
But I now it is real..
u keep me high while I try to upendo ur Blind sides
But then U throw me falling away to reality,,,
pain,,,,hurts,,,,damn night...tears..are here....
I Can Do Nothing,,,
Kiss that takes me to the sky,,,
has the same to give me enormous words filled with hate
how u call it??
hate?
Faith??????
either do we understands...
this is starting over
pure upendo never fades.
They say that
fighting for your aims
brings accomplishment.
They say that
time heals everything.
They say...
upendo is an illusion,
imagination blurs
your mind.
Reality is as sad as
your heart.
But
they say...
Everything is passing,
but the swali still
remains.
Loneliness lives inside.
Hope is still alive.
wewe fall today
but wewe rise up tomorrow.
wewe fight.
wewe want.
wewe dream.
wewe are...
Filled kwa hope
and willing to
live for your dreams,
wewe may win
but
wewe may lose.
Failure is always
minatory,
wewe don't want
your dreams to be buried.
Precious dreams
still live in you,
but your will now
is weak.
But
they say that
hope never dies.
They say that
upendo still shines.
when u look into his eyes...
U'll never guess what goes there
Oh Mine.....
even smile covered ur face,,,,but treasure still hide,,,and secret filling in ur brain
Forget those forbidden Kiss,dear...
he's Not yours...
when u think about how to make it urs..
u'll falling into a mess way
how can it happened?
Oh God,,,I can't throw myself into this Sin,,,
I can betrayed Him,,,
Please Forgive me,,,I miss who forbidden to say
Impossible dream,,,
when u see he's coming over u and realized that eyes glancing on ur mind
dancing as fate could be a real things to u
wewe come
and wewe go
leaving only
fear in your
path
the fear
in a small
child's eyes
a fear that
tells that
very child
that the
monsters of
their dreams
do exist
in the shadows
lurking and
waiting for
a chance
a chance to
let people
see the thing
they fear the most
your a dark
shadow moving
in the night
only seen by
the pale silver
moonlight
leaving only
terrified eyes
and enormous
fear behind
in your
cold
dead
path
everyone has their monsters that lurk and wait to find them. some run some dont but no matter wat they always spark a fear of the truth.
and wewe go
leaving only
fear in your
path
the fear
in a small
child's eyes
a fear that
tells that
very child
that the
monsters of
their dreams
do exist
in the shadows
lurking and
waiting for
a chance
a chance to
let people
see the thing
they fear the most
your a dark
shadow moving
in the night
only seen by
the pale silver
moonlight
leaving only
terrified eyes
and enormous
fear behind
in your
cold
dead
path
everyone has their monsters that lurk and wait to find them. some run some dont but no matter wat they always spark a fear of the truth.
(Don't know where this poem came from in my mind...just came to me while listening to The Doors..)
Strange
Is everything strange?
When wewe are alone, broken and tired
Your feeling of craziness has grown
Hearing voices that weren't there before
They're coming from the walls and even the floor
Telling wewe to enter your brain, come see what's been hiding...
A world where everything is inside out...
Birds flying in the ocean...
samaki swimming in the sky...
mbwa barking but they make no sound...
The trees grow with their roots to the heavens...
And the people are a faceless crowd...
What is this world wewe have found?
Are wewe the only one normal in this world of chaos?
au are wewe the strange one?
Strange
Is everything strange?
When wewe are alone, broken and tired
Your feeling of craziness has grown
Hearing voices that weren't there before
They're coming from the walls and even the floor
Telling wewe to enter your brain, come see what's been hiding...
A world where everything is inside out...
Birds flying in the ocean...
samaki swimming in the sky...
mbwa barking but they make no sound...
The trees grow with their roots to the heavens...
And the people are a faceless crowd...
What is this world wewe have found?
Are wewe the only one normal in this world of chaos?
au are wewe the strange one?
If wewe knew how I felt?
Would wewe have considered a freak?
Would wewe have tied me up
If I fought back?
Would wewe have nailed me to the wall?
Would wewe have kicked me to the floor?
If wewe wanted me.
Would I have cried
If wewe held me in your arms?
Would I have ran away from you?
Would I have turned down the sick offers
If wewe were weak for a change?
Would I have grown up a killer?
Would I have remained this way
If wewe were gone?
Would I have still loved you?
