“Hanging out is different from dating.” I insisted on Jenny as she pointed out the amount of time I spent with Vincent.

Over the past months, we have become almost inseparable. We ate lunch and chajio, chakula cha jioni together, studied together, listened to muziki together, watched sinema together – he even braved a chick flick once. I was engrossed and amused with his tortured reactions zaidi than the movie itself.

I tried to include Jenny as much as possible. I don’t want her to think that I’m ditching her because of Vincent. I also wanted to cheer her up since Paul has finally broken up with her. The long distance thing has taken its toll. I wondered if Jacob agreed to keep our relationship could ours endure.

“Stop babysitting me, Nessie! I can manage on my own. Besides, I could gag with the way wewe looked at each other.” She grumbled.

Rumors about Vincent and me being a couple spread like wildfire. I was always annoyed and wanted to clear things up but Vincent was unperturbed.

“What’s the use, Nessie? People will gossip if they want to. Besides, we don’t have to explain ourselves. We both know the real score.” He drawled.

Do we?

Today, we we’re hanging out yet again. The forest near Dartmouth has been our inayopendelewa place.

He stared intently at a really tall and sturdy tree. The mti groaned and bent halfway down. It extended its thickest branch towards me.

I stood with my mouth agape. This was the first time he showed me his gift. After all the time, I showed him mine…I shook my head. My gift seemed useless compared to him.

“Show off.” I grumbled.

He chuckled softly. “Come on, sit. I can’t kubeba it any longer to see wewe climbing trees with those heels.” He teased while eyeing my strappy stilettos.

I rolled my eyes. We spent so much time together already but I haven’t mustered the courage to ask him to accompany me to duka for shoes. I didn’t know if he’ll murder me if I asked him. I could just imagine his murderous glares if I took him shopping.

I gave out a shriek of surprise when he took me kwa the waist, hoisted me up and gently plopped me down on the waiting branch. The mti slowly straightened, still groaning, when he sat beside me. He casually put his arm around me to steady me while the mti continued to songesha back to its original height. He brushed a stray lock of curls out of my eyes and gently tucked it behind my ear.

This is so uncomfortable.

He sighed. “I know you’re not over him yet, Nessie.” I winced as I realized who he was referring to.

I didn’t receive another call from Jacob. Since I was too chicken to call him myself, I waited and prayed he would – but he never did.

He took my chin and lifted my face so he could stare into my eyes. “I wish wewe would let me make wewe happy.” He murmured softly.

He was too kind. He deserved honesty from me.

“I don’t know, Vincent. I honestly don’t know. I knew Jacob all my life and I’m sorry, Vincent but I barely know you.”

It’s true. I knew almost nothing about him. He asked me incessantly about my life – that made me onyesha him my useless gift. He would always be quiet and sullen afterwards, though. I attributed his silence to the fact that I have a complete happy family and he didn’t.

There was one story he reluctantly shared with me.

“They told me my mother’s name was Viola.”

They?

I bit my tongue. I don’t want to interrupt him with my questions, afraid he wouldn’t continue.

“I don’t know how my father met her. I was only sure that he clearly knew about her gift to have chosen her for his experiment. He must have seduced my young, innocent mother. My poor innocent mother was barely fifteen when she had me.”

I gasped.

Fifteen? Barely fifteen? Are they crazy? What were they thinking?

“They don’t care, of course, that she is too young. They only cared that she is already physically capable to carry a child. Who is she to them, anyway? Just a mere human to be disposed off after her usefulness was spent.”

He was shaking violently with rage now. I now understood where his torment and loneliness came from.

“My mother did not die immediately after giving birth to me. She pleaded with them to let her hold me but they wouldn’t let her. My father was disgusted with her pitiful cries he decided to give her to his vampire friends. Her screams still haunt me until now.”

“That’s why I never hunt humans.” He smiled grimly at me. “Of course, they questioned my choice but they could not force me. The thought of killing someone innocent….” He shuddered.

He never spoke of his family again. There were so many maswali still left haijajibiwa but I don’t care anymore. I knew deep down he was a good person. I decided to respect his privacy. I knew he would tell me about his past when the right time comes. Would that time ever come?

His sigh brought me back to the present. He stared deeply into my eyes. “Do wewe honestly not know who I am, Renesmee?” He whispered softly.
I shrugged. He is Vincent, that’s all I care about.

“So, what are your plans for the semester break?” I asked him in order to change the subject.

His brows pulled into a deep V. “Do wewe have plans?” He asked me instead.

“I’ll visit home. Jenny’s coming with me. She doesn’t want to stay here and she would kill herself first than to go back to Manhattan. She’s scared she might bump into Paul.”

He remained silent.

“Are wewe going to visit your family?”

Wherever they may be…

“No.” He alisema simply.

“What are wewe going to do? Stay here? You’re going to be lonely without me.” I teased.

He took my face in his hands. “I will be. I will definitely miss you, Nessie.”

Oh crap! Bad idea…

He dropped his hands when he saw I was uncomfortable. He was back to his gloomy self in an instant. I want my teasing, happy Vincent back so I blurted out without thinking, “You could come with us, if wewe like.”

Would my father have a moyo attack when I brought nyumbani a half human half vampire guy with me? I chuckled at the thought. I looked at Vincent for he remained silent.

“What do wewe think?” I prompted him.

His face became torn with indecision. “As much as I would like to never leave your side…your family could never meet me.”

“I don’t understand….”

“There is only one thing wewe have to understand, Nessie.” He took my face in his hands and looked deeply into my eyes. “I upendo you.” He whispered softly.

I closed my eyes and shook my head.

“Listen to me.” He whispered urgently. I opened my eyes and gazed into his troubled, tormented beautiful blue eyes. “I upendo you, Renesmee. I never planned this to happen. It complicates a lot of things but I can’t help it.”

I couldn’t answer I still couldn’t understand.

“I won’t ask for wewe to upendo me back. That’s too much to ask for. I knew we could never be. wewe would never have peace and happiness again if wewe chose to be with me. I only ask that wewe believe me….whatever happens…I upendo you.”

I only saw sincerity and determination in his eyes. How could I not believe him? I could not turn my face away as his face slowly lowered and he softly pressed his warm lips on mine