I found these on Tumblr ... thought they were funny (and pretty damn accurate).


This is a little graphic for those of wewe who shy away from this kinda stuff ;)



1. Bella is clumsy, shy and constantly bites her lower lip when she’s nervous

2. Edward finds her lip biting habits sexy

3. Edward is jealous, over protective and a bit controlling

4. Edward has a temper

5. Though there are no Wanyonya damu and no werewolves, Human Edward can actually GROWL

6. Edward has the greenest eyes she’s ever seen and a panty dropping crooked smile

7. Edward always has velvety smooth, warm voice that turns to rough when...

Chapter 2

“Hey Dad, I'm going to the Blacks to see Jacob after school, do wewe think wewe can organize your own dinner?" I asked during my rush down the stairs. I was running late for school for the third siku in this week.
I hope that Charlie understands that when I alisema organize, I mean order pizza au anything that on a piece of paper stuck on our fridge. I want to come nyumbani to a house, not a pile ash.
"Ok Bells, one cheese pizza should be easy" he snickered. Charlie had been aliyopewa days off from work lately for his back. He fell in a puddle while taking out the trash, I learnt that siku my...