Another Top 10.....
Video Games! Whether wewe like them au not, wewe have to admit there's a surprising amount of depth to them! They take wewe to another world and make wewe feel like a hero! An epic bad-ass who can conquer anything as long as s/he believes in him/herself!
au they make us a monkey fighting balloons, that works too.
But sadly, not every game is good. And that's actually understandable! Nothing's perfect, and some games had excuses for being below average!
But there are some moments on this holy planet where hell rises from its grave..... They send us a god-awful disgrace against humanity that should be eradicated from the face of the Earth.....
Bit over-dramatic there. :P
Basic idea, games can be terrible, and today I'm covering the worst one's out there. And now, without further ado, let'sa go! ^___^
o-O
#10. Ghosts N Goblins.
Now, don't get me wrong, but in a way, THIS GAME IS AWESOME. There's only one problem........
THIS IS ONE OF THE HARDEST, CHEAPEST, AND MOST UNFAIR VIDEO GAMES EVER CREATED. SERIOUSLY, EVERYTHING IS AGAINST YOU!
THAT GHOST WANTS wewe DEAD, THAT GOBLIN WANTS wewe DEAD, THAT BAT WANTS wewe DEAD, THAT BAG OF F**KING CHIPS WANTS wewe DEAD.
And almost EVERY SINGLE entry on my juu 10 Things I Hate In Video Games IS IN THIS GAME.
BAD CONTROLS, CHEAP ENEMY PLACEMENT, KNOCK BACK, BOTTOMLESS PITS, A F**KING TIME LIMIT, (A VERY short one at that,) AND HELL, THE ENTIRE GAME MIGHT AS WELL BE A QUICK-TIME EVENT!
Also, this is a game where enemies and projectiles are EVERYWHERE, and are WAY harder to dodge than wewe could ever imagine.
Oh, and wewe also die in 2 hits, only have a few lives, and there's no passwords au save features.
And if ALL THAT wasn't bad enough, when wewe first beat the game, it tells you, basically, wewe HAVE TO BEAT THE ENTIRE DAMN GAME ALL OVER AGAIN ON A HARDER DIFFICULTY.
DO wewe THINK THAT'S ENOUGH KONAMI?!?!?!?!?!?
But the saddest part? Like the god-awful anime Variable Geo Neo, (DON'T LOOK THAT UP, I SWEAR TO GOD. YOU'VE BEEN WARNED.) IT HAD SO POTENTIAL! In VGN's case, it had a VERY cool concept, and it had my inayopendelewa anime opening EVER! In this game's case, it had some unique ideas, a cool weapon system, a nice soundtrack, and would've been great!
That is, if they'd actually TRIED to make an at least REMOTELY fair game! But they didn't, and scammed so many quarters in the 80's it's-
ABSOLUTELY HILARIOUS. :D
Er, I mean, not funny at all. (:D)
In conclusion, THIS IS THE CHEAPEST DAMN GAME EVER MADE! It's WAY too hard for its own good to be ANY fun and that honestly destroys the entire experience.
Hell, I got so mad playing the game I started to wish people went School Days on Konami's punda and slaughtered them.
Moving on, ugh.
#9. E.T. The Extra Terrestrial.
maoni Section: OMG JARED Y-Y-YOU PUT THIS AT ONLY #9!? O-O
Alright, I have to say this. Like the AVGN stated, the game isn't as bad as we thought. Sure, it's monotonous, tedious, frustrating, and boring, but it's not.....
Audience: o-O
Me: That......
Audience: O-O O-O X__X :OOOO
Me: Ba-
Audience: *Slaughters me with an Atari 2600*
Me: Ow.... X_____X
Anyways, this game is still shit. The controls suck, the muziki is a pile of vomit, the F.B.I. Agents are annoying as hell, and the pits were TOTALLY not SO MOTHER F**KING ANNOYING YOU'D HAVE A zaidi FUN TIME DEVOURING THE DECAYED SHIT IN AN OCEAN FULL OF URINE AND SHARKS WHILE A HENTAI TENTACLE TRIES TO DROWN wewe TO DEATH.
Alright, I apologize for that. o-O
Still though, the game is that terrible. But the worst part of the game? Well......
Imagine if wewe were a kid in the late 1900's and wewe bought this game WITHOUT the instructions.....
Yeah, not a very pleasant time.
Overall, although it's not as bad as people say it is, it's STILL shit. With glitches out the wazoo, annoying pits everywhere, and VERY little logic in this game, (Not to say no logic...) The game gets #9 on this list.
#8. Superman 64.
Alright, if wewe wanted to know a game with no effort in it whatsoever, this is the game wewe get.
RANT TIME.
This game is INFAMOUS for being one of the worst games ever made, and that still holds true to this day. Because fact is.....
The game sucks. Hard. Harder than a steel-reinforced barricade.
Honestly, I could go on forever on this, but the worst part of the game is DEFINITELY the controls.
DEAR LORD, THE CONTROLS.
How bad are they? Do wewe really want to know?
Drink 50 gallons of vodka in a dakika and play any game at all.
That's the entire game.
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
DON'T PLAY THIS GAME. I LEARNED IT THE HARD WAY WHEN I BOUGHT IT kwa ACCIDENT WHEN I WAS 11. THIS IS ONE OF THE MOST PAINFUL GAMES I'VE EVER PLAYED, THE CONTROLS SUCK SO MUCH!
And there's time limits too, very short ones! ^____^
...
.............
.....................
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And Superman, THE MOST FAMOUS SUPERHERO OF ALL TIME, is flying through hoops.......
Becau-SCREW THIS GAME AND SCREW MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!
#7. Hotel Mario & The Zelda CDI Games.
Gee, I bet wewe didn't see this one coming! ;D
Seriously, this games are NOTORIOUS for being some of the most unfair, cheap, and badly designed games of all time.
First of all, and kwa far the worst part of both games, the cutscenes.
How bad do they look? Well, take Robotnik from The Adventures Of Sonic The Hedgehog and have an 8 mwaka old draw him in Microsoft Paint.
You could make a million memes out of this picture alone.
And yes, THAT PICTURE IS ACTUALLY IN THE GAME. I SHIT wewe NOT. And that's just the tip of the rage-inducing iceberg because IT GETS EVEN BETTER.
For one, the controls in both games are terrible, and ESPECIALLY in the Zelda games.
I swear to god when playing Zelda CDI every time I pushed a button it vomited all over my clean keyboard.
And it didn't help that the actual controllers themselves are set up so strangely and are so unresponsive you'd have an easier time trying to wake me up after I got bitten kwa a cobra then trying to play with the actual CDI controllers.
How in the name of all that is holy do wewe play with that?
In a nutshell, Mario CDI is just a game where wewe stomp on enemies and hide from them indoors, BUT I SWEAR the hitboxes of those god-forsaken goombas and koopas are larger than the Eiffel Tower. wewe could jump and get hit kwa accident from the goomba above you, THE HITBOXES ARE THAT LARGE!
Also, again, the cutscenes are absolute shit. First time playing the game on a ROM file I thought this was a fan-made game made kwa a sekunde grader, and to this siku I still think it was.
Oh, and the Zelda games are even worse.
For the sake of time, here's the Zelda games in a nutshell.
YOU'RE LINK! wewe CAN songesha LEFT AND RIGHT, AND WHEN PRESSING DOWN, wewe CAN MAKE HIM DO A bata WALK! ;D
Also there's terribly lit rooms, candles that last for a millisecond, cheap enemy placement out the ass, and a map so confusing and hard to use you'd have an easier time trying to T.K.O. Mike Tyson than to use the map.
Also these games pretty much invented memes. That's all that needs to be alisema about these shit stains of the gaming world.
#6. PAC-MAN!?
Alright, so wewe have a hit arcade game, and wewe want to make it on a console. What do wewe do?
A. Take time and effort into trying to make the game as good as the arcade version, if not better.
B. Eat a Pop-Tart because why not?
C. FUCK EVERY SMART IDEA wewe EVER HAD HARD RIGHT IN THE P**SY AND MAKE ONE OF THE WORST CONSOLE PORTS EVER MADE.
If wewe picked C, then wewe need to swali your life decisions. Sadly though, that's what we're about to talk about.
Pac-Man on the Atari 2600. Dear lord, this game is insulting on so many levels. But I think this ENTIRE entry can be summed up with one picture.
Yeah, the game looks absolutely terrible. AND I AM INCLUDING kwa ATARI 2600 STANDARDS!
The game also has a nasty little habit of bugging out every .0001 milliseconds. First time playing this I thought I was drunk, but sadly, I wasn't.
Enemies will go where they aren't even supposed to, the power pellets don't even work sometimes, but the worst part? Well, it's how DISAPPOINTING it was.
Imagine wewe were a kid in the early 80's who loved Pac-Man, and wanted to play it at home! PEOPLE WERE SO HYPED! Like, Five Nights At Freddy's 2 au Super Smash Bros 4 hyped.
Pac-Man was VERY maarufu and they realized making a console port was a smart idea! But all we got was this unpolished mess.
On a final note, if I ever made a juu 10 buggiest games list, this would easily make the juu 3. IT'S THAT BAD.
AND NO, THE GLITCHES AREN'T EVEN FUNNY! THE GAME WILL RANDOMLY GIVE wewe A GAME OVER, IT'LL RANDOMLY CRASH, AND SOMETIMES THE GAME WILL STRAIGHT UP FLIP wewe OFF AND MAKE LEVEL ONE AS HARD AS LEVEL 50!
IT'S UNFAIR, UNPOLISHED, AND WAS ONE OF THE BIGGEST DAMN DISAPPOINTMENTS IN VIDEO GAME HISTORY.
And I swear to god this game will give wewe a seizure if wewe playing it for too long. I'm not even kidding, the flashing sprites REALLY hurt your eyes, just watch this gameplay video of it, IT'S THAT BAD!
link
Moving on. To the juu 5. *Sigh*
Let's fucking do this.
#5.
