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posted by Seanthehedgehog
siku 1

Twilight: *breathes in fresh air* What a beautiful day.
Sean: hujambo Twilight! I have something that I know you'll like which is fitting for a princess well I gotta go bye! *runs 300 miles an hour*
Twilight: What is this? *looks at package* Hahaha. Kiss me I'm british? Well, wewe know what that means everypony that isn't a mare. Who's going to kiss me? Huh? It could be anypony.. Except for Justin Beiber! AHHHH

90 dakika later

Sean: And so, every hater in the world went straight to hell for not liking My Little gppony, pony Friendship Is Magic.
Fluttershy & upinde wa mvua Dash: Yaay!!
Sean: yay!
Twilight: SEAN!!
Sean: AH! Twilight!
Twilight: wewe little prick!! I'M GOING TO STEAL YOUR CAR, RUN wewe OVER WITH IT, AND BURN IT WITH wewe IN THE TRUNK!! Fuck you.
Fluttershy: I-is that y-your da-darkside Twilight?

siku 2

Twilight: *breathes in fresh air* What a beautiful day.
Princess Celestia: Stop, I have to go.
Canterlot soldiers: *Stop*
Twilight: Is she doing what I think she is?
Celestia: *shits on Twilight*
Twilight: OHH GEEZ!!
Celestia: Oops.

siku 3

Twilight: *breathes in fresh air* What a beautiful day.
monkeys: *stare at Twilight*
Twilight: What? Why do wewe have telephones on your head?

Soon the phones began to ring

Twilight: Ah *covers ears* That ringing is so loud.
Applejack: hujambo Twi?
Twilight: What?
Applejack, Rarity, & Pinkie Pie: ANSWER IT!

Those three also had phones on their head

Rarity: Hear, it's for you.
Twilight: *grabs phone*
operator: Thank wewe for calling our sex line. We have many mares that are looking mbele to giving wewe a good time.
Twilight: *hits Rarirty* Why would wewe do something like that?
monkeys: *leave* We're outta here. She hates our ways!
Applejack: Wait! She didn't mean wewe guys!
Twilight: God that was insane. zaidi insane then being with Applebloom.
Applebloom: hujambo Big Mac, where do babies come from?
Big Mac: Oh for the upendo of Celestia! wewe buy them at a store, just like everything else!
Twilight: Well, at least the ringing stopped.

But a telephone on Twilight's head went off.

Twilight: *goes angry* That's it! One of wewe put the phone on my head, and I know who it was! wewe forgot I have caller I.D!
Rarity: Not me! I don't even have a phone.
Pinkie Pie: Not me, my number is enlisted.
Applejack: And their certanly ain't no way it was me. Mah dakika are only free on weekends.
Twilight: IT WAS YOU!! *throws applejack into air*
Applejack: HOW DID SHE KNOW?!!?
Twilight: What is the meaning of all this?! Is it like.. Put phones on ponies head day?
Pinkie Pie: If we told you, would it make this situation less awkward?
Twilight: *sighs* I don't know
Applejack: *falls on Twilight* Sorry sugarcube.
Twilight: Applejack! Get. Off. Me. Now!!

siku 4

Twilight: What a, beautiful d-day?
Dragon: *flies toward Twilight*
Twilight: A dragon?! Now I know why Fluttershy is afraid of them!!
Dragon: That's right! And now you're going to pay the price.
Twilight: *crying* For what? Can't another gppony, pony pay the price? It's been happening to me all week
Dragon: *burns Twilight*
Twilight: OWW! I'm suing Sean the hedgehog for posting this! Wait! I'm suing all of Hasbro!!
upinde wa mvua Dash: psh, she can't make up her mind.
Dragon: *stops burning Twilight*
Twilight: What do wewe want from me?
Dragon: Have wewe ever played Starfox Assault?
Twilight: No! I don't have time for that shit.
Dragon: *continues to burn Twilight*

2 sekunde later

Twilight: Did some gppony, pony order fried alicorn? *falls on ground*

siku 5

Twilight: I just don't get it. Everytime I say what a beautiful siku it is, something bad happens. But wait, maybe if I say the opposite something good might happen. Yeah! I'll give it a try. What a terrible horrible no good really bad day!

Then something was falling from the sky

Twilight: Oh boy, what am I getting? *gets crushed kwa boulder* I'm still alive. How is that possible?

siku 6

Twilight: *crying* This has been the worst week for me. Now I know why people hate Nicholas Cage.
Shining Armor: Twilight? What's wrong?
Twilight: Oh Shining Armor, all I wanted was a good day. But do I get one? Nnnoooooooo. My life has been ruined kwa a gay popstar, Celestia's shit, some phone obsessed imbecules, a moto breathing dragon, and yesterday I got crushed kwa a boulder!
Shining Armor: Wow.
Twilight: Yeah. How can this get any worse?
japanese mafia: *driving toward Twilight*
Shining Armor: That's how, good luck! *leaves*
Twilight: Oh man. This has been quite a week
Japanese mafia: *kill Twilight Sparkle*

---

upinde wa mvua Dash: Man, this week was boring.
Rarity: I know! It was like watching the season 3 finale.
Applejack: Let's complain about it!

And now I have someone at my doorstep

Whatever wewe do, don't call 9-1-1
added by AnxiousSoul
Source: tumblr-l8m0vmZ33o1qc2zn8o1-1280.jpg
added by ace2000
added by ace2000
posted by CokeTheUmbreon
 Motherfucking animals! -Martin Garrix
Motherfucking animals! -Martin Garrix
Hey, Fanpoppers! CokeTheUmbreon here, and I'm gonna tell wewe my inayopendelewa yo mama jokes! Please note that I don't own most of these. The jokes I do own will have a bila mpangilio emoji kwa dem. I was bored thnx to the inactivity and my friend not being around to RP with me today.

P.S. The bila mpangilio emojis neither the Umbreon pics will fit the theme of the jokes.

Anyways, let's get it on!

Yo mama so fat when she walks her upendo handles hit the quan. 😎

Yo mama so stank they use her bathwater as chemical weapons.

Yo mama so fat when she outweighs Groudon. 😈

Yo mama so ugly she gave Darkrai nightmares.

Yo mama...
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added by Eula2003
added by ace2000
posted by pinkydoll
1-Dolphin sleeps with one eye open.

2-"silent" and "listen" use exactly the same letters.

3-An octopus has two hearts

4-Bull frogs do not sleep.

5-There are zaidi chickens than human in the world.

6-flamingos gets their distinctive color from the chakula they eat.

7-The hair of polar kubeba is not white it's transparent.

8-Turtles can breathe through their rear-rends

9-The sun comprises 99% of total mass of our solar system.

10-Butterflies taste with their feet.

11-Venus is the only planet that rotates clockwise.

12-there are about 550 hairs in each of your eyebrow.

13-A konokono can sleep for 3 years.

14-A human eye can distinguish 10 million different colors.

15-Women blink their eyes twice than men.
added by Mollymolata
added by Mollymolata
added by Mollymolata
added by ShadowFan100
added by 3xZ
1. Play hide and seek!

2. Tell your boy/girlfriend how much wewe upendo them.

3. STREAKING! ^__^

4. Give everyone hugs!

5. Give the homeless all your money.

6. Take a shower! Don't want to be dirty before wewe die.

7. Play the scariest horror game wewe know.

8. Tell your Marafiki all your deepest secrets.

9. Grab everything at Target. :D

10. Do the cinnamon challenge. With cocaine. (You're going to die anyways.)

11. zaidi STREAKING! ^___^

12. Take a look back at your life's greatest moments.

13. Do that one thing you've always wanted to do. (In my case, skydiving.)

14. Play some Pac-Man. :P Just because.

15. Go...
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added by xwolf19
CELEBS WHO HAVE BEEN TURNED DOWN kwa THEIR CRUSHES

Not even the One Direction lads get dates with all the people they like! Here's a orodha of celebs who have been turned down kwa their crushes.

Emma Watson: “Between the ages of ten and twelve I had a really terrible crush on Tom Felton, to the extent that I would go into work in the morning and look down the numbers on the call sheet to see if he was going to be in. We upendo a bad guy, he was a few years older and he had a skateboard — and that just did it really." She confessed her feelings, but Tom saw Emma in a “younger, sisterly way.”...
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posted by KissKissHannah
There is someone on deviantART. Not enclosing names because they may also have a fanpop account. *shivers* My friend alisema he was a troll, but he's zaidi than a troll. He's a big BULLY. (The person I mean. Not my friend) He alisema I bragged about being straight (How insulting) and alisema my drawings were *insert a word that rhymes with hit here*. ;n; That was only because I occasionally drew on bases. He also alisema I was zaidi annoying than the annoying fangirls. Just because we have different opinions does NOT mean he has the right to bully me! I don't bully anyone who has different opinions! HE is the one that's zaidi annoying than the annoying fangirls! >:U
posted by ZacharyWhite
When some bila mpangilio girl added me on facebook... She was all like "Oh gosh you're so cute" and I was like "Yeah, sure whatever..." The again she was all like "Oh God I upendo your style!!!" Then again I was like "Yeah.. sure.." Then she alisema "Oh gosshhh!!! It's like I can hear your voice talking in your message!!! You're an emo right? I'm an emo tooooo!! :-D Oh it's like we're SO MEAN'T TO BE!!!" Then I finally realize and alisema to myself "Shit I have a fangirl... okay, I'm doomed."

Girl: Hello? wewe still there?
Me: No...
Girl: Oh you're soooo funnyy :3 We are so the same!!! Ugh! I wish I could just...
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I am the boy who never finished high school because I got called a fag everyday.
I am the girl who was kicked out of her nyumbani because I confided in my mother I was a lesbian.
I am the prostitute working the streets because no one will hire a transsexual woman.
I am the sister who held her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled night.
We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.
I am the man who died alone in a hospital because they would not let my partner of 27 years into the room.
I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away...
continue reading...
added by Dreamtime
added by Gretulee