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posted by Canada24
#1: CAMP NIGHTMARE:
The camp is actually a hoax set up kwa the boy’s parents.. Okay, that would of been fine wait there.. But being Goosebumps, for some reason, it's so the boy can be prepared for an exploratory mission to a place called 'Earth'.. So they're aliens appearently.. Okay.. But WHY?


#2: THE BARKING GHOST:
The mbwa turn out to be humans that have been transformed into dogs, so they transform Cooper and Fergie into mbwa and take over their identities, then Cooper and Fergie transform them back but they accidently get transformed into squirrels au something like that, I don't know. Stine himself hates this book.


#3: SHOCKER ON SHOCK STREET:
If the book’s incredibly naff title isn’t enough of a clue that Stine may have been running low on ideas kwa this point, the twist – that the two main characters are actually robots – is clear proof.


#4: ATTACK OF THE JACK O'LANTERNS:
The Jack O'Lantern monsters are actually the main characters’ two Marafiki in disguise – but they'reg also shape-shifting aliens who eat human flesh.. God, I HATE when that happens. Ruins my whole weekend..


#5: MY BEST FRIEND IS INVISABLE:
The ghost is actually an invisible human, who reveals his Mum made him invisible because he's so hideous looking. It turns out the main characters all have tentacles and multiple eyes, and – in the universe in which the book is set – humans are actually an endangered species.. Sure, why not.


#6: MY HAIRIEST ADVENTURE:
The book ends with Larry, now a dog, watching his parents bringing nyumbani a newborn baby girl named Jasper. The baby has Jasper's yellow eyes. This implies that Dr. Murkin has now found a way to turn Cats into people.

So remember kids, if your turned into a dog kwa a mysterious chemical. Your parents will just adopt another child, and forget wewe ever existed..


#7: DON'T GO TO SLEEP:
Matt remembers how boring his real life really is, and he says that he's back to his boring old reality again. Then the two Reality Police come back and say "Boring- Oh, Matt, the fun's just beginning!" Then the attic door slams shut, and the men laugh maniacally.

JONTRON: So remember kids. "never think". Other wise the reality police will and kill wewe no matter what.


#8: THE GIRL WHO CRIED MONSTER:
A girl discovers the head of her summer kusoma programme is actually a rather unpleasant, turtle-eating monster. In the end. It turns out she (and her parents) are also monsters. Because of coarse they are.


#9: HORROR AT CAMP JELLYJAM:
Wendy and her brother Elliot get separated from her parents and end up at a weird camp, where (like every single other book Stine sets at a camp) odd stuff happens and children routinely disappear.. . It turns out the camp’s disappeared children are forced to work as slaves, cleaning a giant monster made of jelly.. Obviously.


#10: GO EAT WORMS:
Todd decides to abandon his worm hobby once and for all kwa tossing his worms out into the garden, and he begins to collect beautiful butterfly, kipepeo specimens instead, much to the delight of his sister.

Todd is then awakened kwa a giant butterfly, kipepeo holding a huge silver pin who has shown up to take revenge.

DOUG WALKER: wewe know! For kids!
1)"Why, do wewe find me irresistible?"

2)"No, I just dress better than you"

3)"You're a double gay. No returnsies!"

4)"I upendo the sekunde grade insults, *insert name here*. Honestly, isn't it strange how "gay" has come to replace "stupid"? And so what if I was gay? Insulting my sexual orientation is pointless.

NOW...if a girl says you're gay, and wewe actually are, I find the best burn is: "At least I can get a boyfriend."

5)Look them in the face with a deadpan expression. Simply say, "Yes. I'm gay," and walk away. Take their thunder away. It's such a juvenile thing to say in the first place.
Or...
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1. Her eyes were like two brown circles with big black dots in the center.

2. He was as tall as a 6′3″ tree.

3. Her face was a perfect oval, like a mduara, duara that had its two sides gently compressed kwa a Thigh Master.

4. From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you’re on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.

5. John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.

6. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.

7. The ballerina...
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1. We aren’t mind readers!
2. We are not to be used as pawns in trying to make your girlfriends jealous.
3. When wewe sleep over never boss me around in kitanda unless it is during sex.
4. Smoking is the biggest turn off.
5. It never hurts to work out.
6. If wewe don’t want to hear the truth, don’t ask the question.
7. “Fine” au “whatever” is not an appropriate ending to a conversation.
8. If wewe want sex, just ask. (In case wewe didn’t already know.)
9. Don’t expect guys to say as many sweet things as they do in the movies. (It takes a lot of guys and their wives to come up with those...
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1. Guys hate sluts even though they have sex with them! (oh yeah..you're not "popular" if you've slept with zaidi than 5 guys..you're a HOE)

2. "Hey, are wewe busy?" au "Are wewe doing something?" ~ two phrases guys open with to stop from stammering on the phone.

3... Guys may be flirting around all siku but before they go to sleep, they always think about the girl they truly care about.

4. Before they call, guys try to plan out a little about what they're gonna say so there aren't awkward pauses, but once he's on the phone he forgets it all and makes it up as he goes.

5. Guys go crazy over a girl's...
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I got bored, so here wewe go.


1. BlueEyedDemon

2. SuicidalSlut

3. MaliciousIntent

4. GloomyTears

5. Blacklight

6. DarkSunshine

7. FallenIsolation

8. DrowningInTears

9. DismalAngel

10. FallenSolitude

11. HopingInSolitude

12. SilentCall

13. CountingOnRain

14. CalledForMishap

15. RuefulDestiny

16. FallenAngel

17. KilledByAnAngel (I know for a fact it's taken on here kwa my twin sis but I made it up)

18. FlamingCore

19. Darkenin(g)InRegret (The G could be taken off if there is a 15 character like on Fanpop)

20.Itrieditathome

21. RunWithScissors

22. PlaydateWithFire (Over 15 characters but... I like it)

23. RejectedStar...
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1.In the future everyone will be famous for fifteen minutes. I'll have twenty.
2.Sometimes wewe make me so mad i wanna throw wewe in the middle of on-going traffic; but then i realize i would probably kill myself trying to save you.
3.im the type of girl who would burst out laughing in the middle of silence because of something that happened... yesterday.
4.so ill walk the plank & jump with a smile if im going down ill do it in style wewe wont hear me surrender.
5.the truth hurts so we lie
6.silence is golden, duct tape is silver
7.i know your probably thinking oh no she didnt but i just so totally...
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posted by iluvsmj
I called your boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse!

Roses are red violets are blue, God made me pretty, what the hell happen to you?

Right now I'm sitting here looking at wewe trying to see things from your point of view but I can't get my head that far up my ass.

A pretty girl can kiss a guy* a bird can kiss a butterfly* the rising sun can kiss the grass* but wewe my friend!! yes you!! wewe CAN KISS MY ASS*******

If wewe didn't have feet wewe wouldn't wear shoes.....then why do wewe wear a bra??!

mirrors don't talk but lucky for wewe %n they don't laugh

Poof be gone, your breath is too strong, I...
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44 Ways to Make a Girl Happy

Ladies, this will make wewe tear up :)

Fellas, read all of it:)

1-Touch her waist.

2-Talk to her.

3-Share secrets.

4-Give her your jacket.

5-Kiss her slowly.

Are wewe remembering this?

6-Hug her.

7-Hold her.

8-Laugh with her.

9-Invite her somewhere.

10-Let her be with wewe when you're with your friends.

Keep reading...

11-Smile with her.

12-Take pics with her.

13-Pull her onto your lap.

14-When she says she loves wewe more, deny it. fight back.

15-When her Marafiki say i upendo her zaidi than you, deny it; fight back and hug her tight so she can't get...
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I never thought I would be doing a orodha like this because when I do lists based on looks it's on women. As a straight guy, it's easier for me to rank women than men. However, when I put my mind to something I try my best to come through. I had already done this orodha with women and I remember being asked if I would ever do it with men, so here it is. Keep in mind this is all just my personal opinion as a straight guy and it wasn't easy to figure out AT ALL! Please maoni but be polite. Also, always maoni because I worked HARD on this and during a time I had just had laser eye surgery and...
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42 Things That Will Make Your Parents Go Crazy.

1. Follow them around the house everywhere...

2. Moo when they say your name...

3. Run into walls...

4. Say that wearing clothes is against your religion...

5. Stand over them at four in the morning with a huge grin on your face and say, good morning sunshine...

6. Pluck someone's hair out and yell, "DNA"...

7. Wear a sticker that says, "I'm a retard"...

8. Have 20 imaginary Marafiki that wewe talk to all the time...

9. In public yell, "No Mom/Dad, I will not make out with you!!"...

10. Do what they actually tell you...

11. Jump off the roof, trying...
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posted by CoaxochYJ
My suicide note that I threw away cuz of my awesome Marafiki and life I wanted to keep.

To the friends, I call my family,

By the time wewe read this letter, I will be only a faded memory.

A corpse on the cold bathroom floor.

It is too late for me now, and I know it.

Even as I write this letter I can feel the life draining out of me.

But I feel it, so that's something, right?

I have been dead for a while now, though wewe may not have noticed.

I died the night I couldn't upendo you, my love.

I loved wewe with everything.

My heart, my body and soul.

I am sorry I wasn't good enough for you.

At least you're happy....
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posted by Bubblekat
1. Go around stores, pick up items and yell out really loudly "Who buys this CRAP anyway?!"

2. Get a cart, get on the bar below the bar wewe grip, and push it down the isle, extra points for running into something au someone

3. Go up to a bila mpangilio person and say "you have pretty eyes, may I have your eyes?!" and hear to see what they say

4. Laugh randomly

5. If someones talking on a cellphone Go closer to them and start maki bila mpangilio noises to disturb them, extra points if they hang up

6. If your near a kisima, chemchemi run to it and start splashing in it

7. If your mom starts nagging to wewe in public about the...
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I'm a girl pervert!I say guys are crazy cuz they think I touch their butts!I blame it on their hormones even though I touched their butts alot!

1.Be a real pervert

2.You don't have to look like one but just act like one

3.Always when you're walking behind a guy always look at their butt!And say"say veiw" then touch it nice and gently! :)

4.They look back and ask wewe say'what?no way especially not your flat ass!!!!"when they turn around find another butt to look at!

5.Look at their muscles when they're wearing shati sleeve shirts and they're doing heavy lifting

6.Take pictures as well

7.Always comment...
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posted by fencingrocks
No, I'm not racist I just found it on youtube.

If wewe want to check it out link

59. Goldstein
58. Burgenblatt
57. Burgenstein
56. Birumbaum
55. Farbstein
54. Grepslach
53. Steinbergavinski
52. Schnitzler
51. Pupikatvitz
50. Schnitzelmacher
49. Schpoilgekatz
48. Manashevitz
47. Platzenfinkle
46. Yankelovitz
45.Shteinshtein
44. Oyvayski
43. Shmoigerberg
42. Choppedleiberman
41.Zilbershpitzanhimelfarbenfleishebien
40.Gefiltafarb
39. Gefiltashlep
38. B'Bergberg
37. Yidihevitz
36. Synagogavitz
35. Parkenfien
34. LOL they forgot this one... :D
33. Kinkenberg
32. Menachemchem
31. Rechtum
30. Along with this one
29. Docotrlawyerstein...
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posted by Lady10358
Found this on Google
1. If you're lucky enough and find someone with the shirt: FREE HUGS au If wewe find a shati store selling it, hug the shirt/person and if they/someone notices you, say "It says free hugs!"
2. go to the chakula court and go to a fast chakula place and take tons of straws and put as many possible in your mouth and stand on a meza, jedwali imba elmo's world theme.
3. Go to one of those toddler toy/clothing stores and hold up a baby outfit/toy and yell as loud as wewe can "I upendo THIS TOY! I'D PLAY WITH IT siku AND NIGHT!"
4. Go to the bathroom and hide in a stall until wewe see an old lady/guy...
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posted by Shelly_McShelly
my friend sent me this text message a while zamani and i thought it was hilarious!!!




i need to ask wewe somethingand i want wewe to be totally honest with me. it may be awkward between us after this but i have to kow how wewe feel... I've kept it in for a while now but now it's time to be straight up and just confront you. i hope this doesn't ruin anything we have, i just need to know and i dont see any other way i could get over this. it just doesn't seem fair if i dont gett an answer. i want wewe to tell me truthfully, please no matter how harsh it is. i just want your hoest opinion...

Pepsi au Coke?



Ha ha ha ha !!!
Funny.
added by xxXsk8trXxx
1.I like pie

2.Blue isn't blue until blue turns blue and when blue turns blue it's possibly blue and when blue turns blue, blue is orange.

3.My cat can fly. I taught him to the other day.

4.Dog chakula is a beautiful thing to watch when wewe are eating!

5.BLACK HEAD!!!!!!!!

6.Butterfly fly away, because I'm your biggest fan, and I got a feeling that you'll shine on like the Moonstone high at the end of time.

7.Heeeeeeeloo!

8. My name is Cow. I like purple. My name is purple. I like cows. In the end, the odds come together and we get out alive.

9. I'M IN HELL WHENEVER I'M AROUND POOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP!

10. Fartblossom!

11.Pip-pip cheerio! (In and English accent.)

12. Your face is disorted when wewe sleeeeeep.

13. Bye alisema Santa while eating Blitzen.
added by XxKeithHarkinxX
Source: Google
just got this while browsing the net

1.I was kidnapped kwa terrorists and they only just let me go, so I didn't have time to do it.

2.I didn't do it because I didn't want to add to my teacher's heavy workload.

3.A bunch of nerds aliiba it to make sure theirs were completely perfect.

4.We ran out of toilet paper at my house last night, and my Dad isn't feeling so good. He grabbed it in a big rush and I haven't seen it since.

5.My mother took it to have it framed.

6.It was in my back pocket and a pickpocket aliiba it.

7.I let somebody copy it but they never gave it back.

8.My mom's whooping cough vaccination...
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