"So," she alisema slowly, "You two seem like a happy couple. But tell me Tiana, is Naveen well equipped au is that big ngome of his supposed to be compensating for something?"
"Beg your pardon?" asked Tiana.
"You know, the family jewels, are they the kind you'd want on an engagement ring au the kind wewe mistake for a sequin from the Dollar Store?"
Tiana still looked unsure.
"Does he have a big penis?" pea, njegere rolled her eyes. "God, some of these goody-goodies just don't understand my metaphors. Anyway, what kingdom are wewe from?"
"Oh, I'm only royal kwa marriage," Tiana laughed. "I was a waitress before I met Naveen."
Pea's jaw dropped. "A waitress? That's one step up from being the bird lady Mary Poppins sings about. Geez, Naveen, I can't believe wewe settled for a commoner."
"What can I say?" chuckled Naveen, his voice sexy as usual. "I fell in love."
"It's just as easy to fall in upendo with a rich person as it is to fall for a poor person. That's what my mother always told me," answered Pea. "I wouldn't be caught dead marrying a peasant. Gross...no offence, Tiana."
"None taken," she replied, through clenched teeth.
Pea's words stung Conrad on the moyo a little bit because he had started to grow quite fond of her, although he didn't have a lot to offer. Just then, the four arrived at Mama Odie's hut in the bayou. The little old lady came swinging down a vine, laughing psychotically. She had sunglasses on her face and a snake on her shoulder.
"Are wewe sure she doesn't belong in the loonie bin?" pea, njegere asked Tiana. "She looks like a total whack-job."
"Well, well, well," alisema Mama Odie. "Tiana and Naveen, nice seein' ya again. The last time I saw y'alls wewe two were a couple of frogs turning human."
"You two were frogs?" inquired Conrad.
"Long story," answered Naveen.
"Listen, Mama Odie, I just need wewe to use your magic wand au whatever it is wewe do and turn back time...bring me back to the time before I was exiled, when I was truly happy."
"Were wewe happy though, Pea?"
"Ugh! Yes!" pea, njegere was annoyed. "Why does no one believe me when I say I loved my old life, it's all I want!"
"Child, sometimes it ain't about what wewe want," replied the strange woman. "It's about what wewe need...Someday you'll figure that out. But until then, I can't help ya!" With that, she returned to her hut.
"We traveled all this way for that?" yelled Pea. "I could've gotten zaidi useful advice from Dr. Phil! God, this is hopeless!"
"Thanks for all your help guys," alisema Conrad politely. "I'm sure we'll be fine. See wewe around."
Tiana and Naveen waved goodbye and headed back to New Orleans.
"Pea," alisema Conrad. "I know that things are gonna work out in the end...I promise you. No matter what happens, I'll be kwa your side."
"Well, what are we gonna do?" asked Pea, fighting back tears. "Hmm...wait a second...I think I just thought of our inayofuata method of transportation..."
pea, njegere and Conrad spent the inayofuata two and a half hours building a raft, slab out of wood, branches, and vines.
Mama Odie watched proudly through her window from above.
"You know what?" she alisema to her snake. "I truly think she's gonna be okay. That princess is smarter than anyone gives her credit for."
(End Of Part 14)
