Ross: I would tarehe her but there is a big age difference.
Joey: Well think about it when you're 90...
Ross: I know, she'll be 80 and it won't be such a big difference.
Joey: No. What I was gonna say is when you're 90 you'll still have the memory of what it was like to be with a 20-year-old
Phoebe: [Right after playing a song in the coffee duka ] If wewe want to receive e-mails about my upcoming shows, then please give me money so I can buy a computer.
Ross: [receiving his krisimasi gift] wewe got me a cola drink.
Chandler: And a lemon, limau LIME.
Ross: wewe shouldn't have. I feel like I should get wewe another sweater.
Joey: And last but not least.
[Monica receives her gift]
Joey: They're RIBBED FOR YOUR PLEASURE.
Chandler: All right, look if wewe absolutely have to tell her the truth, at least wait until the timing's right. And that's what deathbeds are for.
[pounding a scone]
Ross: Stupid British snack food.
Chandler: Did they teach wewe that in your anger management class?
[In response to a stupid comment]
Chandler: wewe have to stop the Q-Tip when there's resistance.
Rachel: Hey, just so wewe know: it's *not* that common, it *doesn't* "happen to every guy, " and it *is* a big deal!
Chandler: [pointing] I *knew* it!
Rachel: So are things between wewe and Joey getting any better?
Chandler: It couldn't get any worse. Last night, I spent eight hours calling him, trying to get him to talk to me.
Rachel: Oh, wow. Eight hours. So wewe could probably really use one of those plug-in telephone headsets, huh?
Ross: Should we all expect krisimasi gifts that can be stolen from your office?
Rachel: wewe shouldn't.
Judy Geller: Well, he better not come kwa here. He can't see the bride in the wedding dress.
Nora Bing: As I recall, when we got married, I saw the groom in the wedding dress.
Charles Bing: But that was after the wedding. It's not bad luck then.
Nora Bing: Honey, it isn't good luck.
Rachel: Wha... married?
Ross: Well, yeah, I think we should get married!
Rachel: What? Because that's your answer to everything?
Ross: Oh. *Oh*. Thank God, most women don't even feel them.
Rachel: Okay, no uterus, no opinion.
Ross: wewe know, we should probably ask the doctor if she even knows how to deliver a baby that's half human, half *pure evil*!
Rachel: ...How many centimeters am I dilated? Eight? Nine?
Dr Long: Three.
Ross: Just three? I'm dilated three!
Monica: Can wewe help me fold these napkins?
Phoebe: Sure.
Monica: I'm gonna go across the hall and check on the yams.
[Notices the way Pheobe is folding the napkins]
Monica: No... no honey... Not like that, we're not a ghalani dance. wewe wanna fold them like swans like I showed wewe at Christmas, remember?
Phoebe: Yeah. It all came screaming back to me.
Ross: Chandler entered a Vanilla Ice look-alike contest and *won*!
Chandler: Ross came fourth and cried!
Monica: wewe don't like the game, because wewe suck at it.
Chandler: I don't suck at it. It sucks. And wewe suck.
Phoebe: [Imitating someone really annoying] "Oh, I slept with Billy Joel." Who hasn't?
Ross: What the hell are wewe doing, wewe scared the crap out of me!
Ross: What are wewe doing?
Chandler: Making chokoleti milk. wewe want some?
Ross: No thanks, I'm 29.
Ross: Oh, really? Well, I guess Monica should know about Atlantic City.
Chandler: Du-ude!
Monica: What happened in Atlantic City?
Ross: Well, Chandler and I are in a bar...
Chandler: Did wewe not hear me say, "Du-ude"?
Ross: ...and this girl is making eyes at Chandler, okay? So after a while he just goes over to her and, uh, after a dakika au two, I see them kissing. Now, I know what you're thinking. Chandler's not the type of guy who just goes to bars and makes out with girls. And you're right. Chandler's not the type of guy just goes to bars and makes out with girls.
Monica: wewe kissed a guy? Oh my God.
Chandler: In my defense, it was dark and he was a very pretty guy.
Janice: [repeated line throughout the series] Oh... my... God!
Chandler: [after a resident has come on to Monica] Is there anyone in this building who hasn't tried to hit on you?
Monica: Well, there's Smokes-a-lot-Lady.
[thinks]
Monica: Wait a minute, that is not true.
Joey: [Joey, Phoebe, Chandler and Monica are in Chapel in Vegas after Rachel and Ross got married] Well, what happened, did we miss it?
Chandler: Well, we actually missed it.
Phoebe: [with clenched teeth] Well, maybe wewe wouldn't have if wewe could run in the chapel!
Ross: Can I borrow your blue tie? Emma spit on mine.
Chandler: Okay, but you'll have to give it back when I get a job. Of course, kwa then, ties will be obsolete and we'll all be wearing silver jumpsuits.
Rachel: Can wewe take care of Emma just for today?
Ross: Sure, just lend me your breasts and we'll be on our way.
Monica: Guys can fake it? Unbelievable! The one thing that's ours!
Monica: Hi.
Chandler: wewe are not gonna believe what I did today.
Monica: Well, clearly wewe didn't kuoga au shave.
Chandler: I got good. I played this game all siku and now I rule. They should change the name to Ms. Chandler.
[pause]
Chandler: Although, I hope they don't.
Monica: Wait a minute, wewe staid nyumbani all siku playing Ms. Pacman, while I was at work like some kind of chump?
Chandler: Yeah, and I got all the juu ten scores and erased Phoebe off the board. High five!
Monica: What is the matter with your hand?
Chandler: Well, I've been playing for like eight hours. It'll loosen up, come on check out the scores. Oh, and also look at the initials, their dirty words.
Monica: Chandler, why would wewe do that?
Chandler: Because it's awesome.
Monica: wewe think this is clever?
Chandler: Well, they only give wewe three letters, so after A.S.S., it is a bit of a challenge.
Monica: Wait a minute, this one's not dirty.
Chandler: Well, it is, when wewe put it together with that one.
Monica: Oh, well, if wewe don't clear this off, wewe wont be getting those from me. Ben's coming tomorrow over to play this game, this can't be there.
Chandler: Come on, he wont even know what they mean.
Monica: He's seven, not stupid.
Chandler: Have wewe talked to him lately?
Monica: All right, I'm just going to unplug it...
Chandler: No, no, no, if you'll unplug it, then there will be nothing to onyesha from my day. It would be like I was at work!
[Monica unplugs it]
Chandler: Look at that, look at that, it's still there, this thing must have a primitive ROM chip!
Monica: wewe gotta beat your scores.
Chandler: With the claw?
Monica: Fine, I'll do it. We gotta get this off the screen. Carol and Susan are still upset that wewe taught him "Pull my finger".
Chandler: Pull my finger... my hand is messed up!
Joey: I hate Pottery ghalani too! They kicked me out of there just because I sat on a bed.
Chandler: wewe took off your pants and cimbed under the sheets!
Phoebe: Hey. Why isn't it Spidermen? wewe know, like Goldmen, Silvermen.
Chandler: Because, it... it's not his last name.
Phoebe: It isn't?
Chandler: No. It's not like Phil Spidermen. He's a buibui *man*. wewe know, like Goldmen is a last name but there's no dhahabu man.
Phoebe: Oh, oh okay...
Phoebe: There should *be* a dhahabu man!
Rachel: [Chandler has been left pantsless and handcuffed to Rachel's boss's desk. Rachel has grudgingly agreed to release him] wewe promise wewe will never see Joanna again.
Chandler: Never.
Rachel: wewe will never set foot in this office again.
Chandler: No.
Rachel: You'll give me back my Walkman.
Chandler: I prom... I never borrowed your Walkman.
Rachel: [pause] Well, then I Lost it, wewe buy me one!
Chandler: wewe got it! Come on!
Rachel: [unlocks cuffs. Chandler rubs wrists where cuffs were] Does it hurt?
Chandler: No, I just see guys doing this when they get cuffs taken off.
[runs over to office door where his pants are hanging]
Chandler: Hello, sweet pants!
Rachel: Wait a minute! How are wewe going to say wewe got out?
Chandler: I'll make something up. I'm good at lying. I actually did borrow your Walkman.
Joey: Well think about it when you're 90...
Ross: I know, she'll be 80 and it won't be such a big difference.
Joey: No. What I was gonna say is when you're 90 you'll still have the memory of what it was like to be with a 20-year-old
Phoebe: [Right after playing a song in the coffee duka ] If wewe want to receive e-mails about my upcoming shows, then please give me money so I can buy a computer.
Ross: [receiving his krisimasi gift] wewe got me a cola drink.
Chandler: And a lemon, limau LIME.
Ross: wewe shouldn't have. I feel like I should get wewe another sweater.
Joey: And last but not least.
[Monica receives her gift]
Joey: They're RIBBED FOR YOUR PLEASURE.
Chandler: All right, look if wewe absolutely have to tell her the truth, at least wait until the timing's right. And that's what deathbeds are for.
[pounding a scone]
Ross: Stupid British snack food.
Chandler: Did they teach wewe that in your anger management class?
[In response to a stupid comment]
Chandler: wewe have to stop the Q-Tip when there's resistance.
Rachel: Hey, just so wewe know: it's *not* that common, it *doesn't* "happen to every guy, " and it *is* a big deal!
Chandler: [pointing] I *knew* it!
Rachel: So are things between wewe and Joey getting any better?
Chandler: It couldn't get any worse. Last night, I spent eight hours calling him, trying to get him to talk to me.
Rachel: Oh, wow. Eight hours. So wewe could probably really use one of those plug-in telephone headsets, huh?
Ross: Should we all expect krisimasi gifts that can be stolen from your office?
Rachel: wewe shouldn't.
Judy Geller: Well, he better not come kwa here. He can't see the bride in the wedding dress.
Nora Bing: As I recall, when we got married, I saw the groom in the wedding dress.
Charles Bing: But that was after the wedding. It's not bad luck then.
Nora Bing: Honey, it isn't good luck.
Rachel: Wha... married?
Ross: Well, yeah, I think we should get married!
Rachel: What? Because that's your answer to everything?
Ross: Oh. *Oh*. Thank God, most women don't even feel them.
Rachel: Okay, no uterus, no opinion.
Ross: wewe know, we should probably ask the doctor if she even knows how to deliver a baby that's half human, half *pure evil*!
Rachel: ...How many centimeters am I dilated? Eight? Nine?
Dr Long: Three.
Ross: Just three? I'm dilated three!
Monica: Can wewe help me fold these napkins?
Phoebe: Sure.
Monica: I'm gonna go across the hall and check on the yams.
[Notices the way Pheobe is folding the napkins]
Monica: No... no honey... Not like that, we're not a ghalani dance. wewe wanna fold them like swans like I showed wewe at Christmas, remember?
Phoebe: Yeah. It all came screaming back to me.
Ross: Chandler entered a Vanilla Ice look-alike contest and *won*!
Chandler: Ross came fourth and cried!
Monica: wewe don't like the game, because wewe suck at it.
Chandler: I don't suck at it. It sucks. And wewe suck.
Phoebe: [Imitating someone really annoying] "Oh, I slept with Billy Joel." Who hasn't?
Ross: What the hell are wewe doing, wewe scared the crap out of me!
Ross: What are wewe doing?
Chandler: Making chokoleti milk. wewe want some?
Ross: No thanks, I'm 29.
Ross: Oh, really? Well, I guess Monica should know about Atlantic City.
Chandler: Du-ude!
Monica: What happened in Atlantic City?
Ross: Well, Chandler and I are in a bar...
Chandler: Did wewe not hear me say, "Du-ude"?
Ross: ...and this girl is making eyes at Chandler, okay? So after a while he just goes over to her and, uh, after a dakika au two, I see them kissing. Now, I know what you're thinking. Chandler's not the type of guy who just goes to bars and makes out with girls. And you're right. Chandler's not the type of guy just goes to bars and makes out with girls.
Monica: wewe kissed a guy? Oh my God.
Chandler: In my defense, it was dark and he was a very pretty guy.
Janice: [repeated line throughout the series] Oh... my... God!
Chandler: [after a resident has come on to Monica] Is there anyone in this building who hasn't tried to hit on you?
Monica: Well, there's Smokes-a-lot-Lady.
[thinks]
Monica: Wait a minute, that is not true.
Joey: [Joey, Phoebe, Chandler and Monica are in Chapel in Vegas after Rachel and Ross got married] Well, what happened, did we miss it?
Chandler: Well, we actually missed it.
Phoebe: [with clenched teeth] Well, maybe wewe wouldn't have if wewe could run in the chapel!
Ross: Can I borrow your blue tie? Emma spit on mine.
Chandler: Okay, but you'll have to give it back when I get a job. Of course, kwa then, ties will be obsolete and we'll all be wearing silver jumpsuits.
Rachel: Can wewe take care of Emma just for today?
Ross: Sure, just lend me your breasts and we'll be on our way.
Monica: Guys can fake it? Unbelievable! The one thing that's ours!
Monica: Hi.
Chandler: wewe are not gonna believe what I did today.
Monica: Well, clearly wewe didn't kuoga au shave.
Chandler: I got good. I played this game all siku and now I rule. They should change the name to Ms. Chandler.
[pause]
Chandler: Although, I hope they don't.
Monica: Wait a minute, wewe staid nyumbani all siku playing Ms. Pacman, while I was at work like some kind of chump?
Chandler: Yeah, and I got all the juu ten scores and erased Phoebe off the board. High five!
Monica: What is the matter with your hand?
Chandler: Well, I've been playing for like eight hours. It'll loosen up, come on check out the scores. Oh, and also look at the initials, their dirty words.
Monica: Chandler, why would wewe do that?
Chandler: Because it's awesome.
Monica: wewe think this is clever?
Chandler: Well, they only give wewe three letters, so after A.S.S., it is a bit of a challenge.
Monica: Wait a minute, this one's not dirty.
Chandler: Well, it is, when wewe put it together with that one.
Monica: Oh, well, if wewe don't clear this off, wewe wont be getting those from me. Ben's coming tomorrow over to play this game, this can't be there.
Chandler: Come on, he wont even know what they mean.
Monica: He's seven, not stupid.
Chandler: Have wewe talked to him lately?
Monica: All right, I'm just going to unplug it...
Chandler: No, no, no, if you'll unplug it, then there will be nothing to onyesha from my day. It would be like I was at work!
[Monica unplugs it]
Chandler: Look at that, look at that, it's still there, this thing must have a primitive ROM chip!
Monica: wewe gotta beat your scores.
Chandler: With the claw?
Monica: Fine, I'll do it. We gotta get this off the screen. Carol and Susan are still upset that wewe taught him "Pull my finger".
Chandler: Pull my finger... my hand is messed up!
Joey: I hate Pottery ghalani too! They kicked me out of there just because I sat on a bed.
Chandler: wewe took off your pants and cimbed under the sheets!
Phoebe: Hey. Why isn't it Spidermen? wewe know, like Goldmen, Silvermen.
Chandler: Because, it... it's not his last name.
Phoebe: It isn't?
Chandler: No. It's not like Phil Spidermen. He's a buibui *man*. wewe know, like Goldmen is a last name but there's no dhahabu man.
Phoebe: Oh, oh okay...
Phoebe: There should *be* a dhahabu man!
Rachel: [Chandler has been left pantsless and handcuffed to Rachel's boss's desk. Rachel has grudgingly agreed to release him] wewe promise wewe will never see Joanna again.
Chandler: Never.
Rachel: wewe will never set foot in this office again.
Chandler: No.
Rachel: You'll give me back my Walkman.
Chandler: I prom... I never borrowed your Walkman.
Rachel: [pause] Well, then I Lost it, wewe buy me one!
Chandler: wewe got it! Come on!
Rachel: [unlocks cuffs. Chandler rubs wrists where cuffs were] Does it hurt?
Chandler: No, I just see guys doing this when they get cuffs taken off.
[runs over to office door where his pants are hanging]
Chandler: Hello, sweet pants!
Rachel: Wait a minute! How are wewe going to say wewe got out?
Chandler: I'll make something up. I'm good at lying. I actually did borrow your Walkman.