Running from Chicagoat to San Franciscolt is a railroad called the Union Pacific. It's the largest railroad in the United States, and is run kwa thousands of ponies. This is the story of some of those ponies that run the rails, aka railroading.

Episode 6: Percy's "Finest" Hour

May 21, 1951

wewe already know this, but bare with me. Percy fixes tracks on the Union Pacific. He usually works with his best friend Jeff, but today that would change.

Percy: *walks along station*
Pete: Percy, I have some bad news.
Percy: What is it?
Pete: Jeff isn't feeling well, and took the siku off. So we got wewe another gppony, pony to work with.
Percy: Uh, ok. Where is he?
Pete: He's right here.

The new gppony, pony was a black stallion, and walked rather quickly to the two ponies. His voice made him sound like he smoked 10 packs of cigarettes.

BS: Hello. My name is.. Douchebag.
Pete: Uh, yeah. You're working with Douchebag until Jeff feels better.
Percy: Ok. Come on Douchebag, I'll onyesha wewe around.
Douchebag: Ok. *follows*
Percy: *walks to servicing facility* Sometimes we get to service engines here, but we mostly fix tracks.
Douchebag: Uh huh.
Percy: Over there is our truck. We drive it around the tracks, but if we're lucky we get to ride on a railcar.
Douchebag: Where are the keys to the truck?
Percy: I have them.
Douchebag: *steals keys*
Percy: Hey!
Douchebag: *steals truck*
Percy: I cannot believe this is happening. *runs to railcar*

As Douchebag was driving away, he nearly hit a train

Hawkeye: Whoa! Who was that?
Percy: *driving rail car toward Hawkeye's train* NO! *stops*
Hawkeye: *driving 39 miles an hour*
Percy: Come on! I have a theif to catch!

But luckily for Percy, the truck stalled

Douchebag: Grrrrr. How do I fix this?! *turns key* It didn't start *turns key*
Hawkeye: *passes Douchebag*

Meanwhile at the switch

Percy: *sees the end of Hawkeye's train* Finally *drives onto mainline*
Douchebag: *starts truck*
Percy: This gppony, pony is zaidi obnoxious then Gordon
Douchebag: *driving at 25 miles an hour*
Percy: *catching up*
Douchebag: *doing 30*
Percy: *catching up*
Douchebag: *doing 35*
Percy: *catches up* Douchebag!! Stop the truck!
Douchebag: No!
Percy: I now see why they call wewe Douchebag!
Douchebag: *rams Percy off rails*
Percy: *Flying after Douchebag*
Douchebag: *drives on train tracks*
Percy: *lands on truck*
Douchebag: Get off!!
Percy: no
Douchebag: *swerves to left*
Percy: *nearly falls off*
Douchebag: *Swerves to right*
Percy: *falls off*
Douchebag: Hahahaha. *sees train* AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH *crashes*
Orion: Oh my god! How many times am I going to crash into things?!

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