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 A Masked tiva, mbwigu
A Masked Shrike
After getting Jordyn's wallet, Shredder went to where Brewster was.

Brewster: *Whistling like a bird* And that I'm sure wewe all know is the good old robin. *Shows chalkboard* Now, let's take a look at our inayofuata bird, the Masked Shrike, the butcher bird.
Shredder: *Arrives*
Brewster: Ah, Shredder. Sit down, you'll find your papers, and drawing utensils under the table.
Shredder: *Sits down*
Luke: I didn't know wewe had an interest for birds.
Shredder: Yeah, wewe should stick around, and learn a few things.
Luke: I've got better things to do then learn about birds. *Leaves*
Brewster: Well, that's a shame that the guard couldn't stay with us, but let's stay on track. As wewe can see from this drawing of the Masked tiva, mbwigu it's got a good round shape.
Luke: *Walking towards Gilda's office*
Gordon: *Switches lids on garbage cans*
Shining Armor: *Knocks on door three times*
Brewster: Coast is clear.
Bartholomew: Alright, let's see what we got.
Brewster: *Shows forgeries*
Bartholomew: These are good. Now all we need are Identification Papers. Without them, we can't forge any for us.
Shredder: I can change that *Shows Identification papers* And here's a passport, a Sparkle pass.
Jade: A sparkle pass?
Airborne: That gives anyone permission to be in Nazi territory.
Shredder: And we've also got a ticket to Oden, and what appears to be a ticket for a play in Dusseldorf in two weeks.
Bartholomew: wewe get ten out of ten for this chap.
Airborne: Just one question. Where did wewe get all this?
Shredder: It's on a loan.

Later that night.

James: Now I want to onyesha wewe the clothing that I've been working on.
Bartholomew: Alright, onyesha me.
James: What I've got here is a black luxury suit, with a fedora. Now, this also comes with a red tie, a white vest, and a pocket watch.
Bartholomew: Great work.
James: Here is something that I'm nearly done with. This is a uniform for anypony that is in Discord's army.
Bartholomew: I thought they had humans, like the Nazis do.
James: Discord allows only ponies from Italy to jiunge his army.
Bartholomew: But you're Italian.
James: Yes, don't rub it in. Now, here's one that I dyed with a bottle of blue ink. A regular outfit for the working pony.
Bartholomew: Very creative, and very amazing.
James: Thank you. All those blankets wewe see there on the bed, are going to be used tomorrow.
Bartholomew: That's a lot of blankets. Where did wewe get them?
James: Shredder got them for me.
Bartholomew: Well where did he get them?!
James: I asked him that, and wewe know what he said?
Bartholomew: What?
James: Don't ask.

2 B continued
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Tom continued insulting politicians, much to the delight of his audience.

Tom: Presidential candidates are always a good target for comedians to make fun of, but wewe know what another maarufu target is? Black Lives Matter.
Crowd: *Cheering*
Tom: Many black ponies are accusing millions of ponies of the Caucasian race, for something only one police officer did in the Midwest!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Who's the racist now wewe assholes?!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: And do wewe really think that every single Caucasian hates blacks?! When did we time travel back to the 18th Century?!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Even the...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
What's a comedy onyesha without politics? Tom is going to make fun of the presidential election.

Tom: I don't know what's worse, this covid pandemic, au the presidential election.
Crowd: Yeah!!!
Tom: I don't trust either Trump, au Biden so I'm not going to vote. *Talks like a filly* But Tom, it's important for the economy!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Losing jobs, and spending money on taxes is not good for the economy!
Crowd: *Cheering*
Tom: I don't give a fuck what ponies tell me. I don't trust the president, I don't trust the princess, I don't trust anyone that works for the Equestrian government! Why?...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
After mentioning things wewe should only do alone, Tom had another segment for his audience to enjoy.

Tom: wewe know one thing I like to do when I'm alone? Rewatch some episodes of On The Block.
Crowd: *Cheering*
Tom: Not only do I enjoy comedy, but I also enjoy being an actor. It's the only job where wewe can get away with murder.
Crowd: *Quietly laughing*
Tom: Unless you're Robert Deniro, and the main protagonist is Al Pacino.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Seeing those two together was a lot of fun, but what really surprised me was seeing Pacino as a cop. He's normally the criminal, but I still got a kick...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
 Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see!
Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see!


St. Foalis Maressouri, 6 PM.

A crowd of thousands of ponies gathered at the Gateway Arch to experience a comedy onyesha that was being filmed live in 4k. The comedian? Tom Foolery.

Crowd: *Clapping, and chanting* Tom! Tom! Tom! Tom! Tom! Tom! Tom!
Tom: *Arrives at a temporary stage under the Gateway Arch*
Crowd: *Cheering, as they continue to clap*
Tom: Thank wewe everypony.
Crowd: *Continuing to cheer and clap*
Tom: Thank wewe very much.
Crowd: *Continuing to cheer and clap*
Tom: And shut up.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom:...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog


Jerry: Sorry, but I got nothing.
Vito: I don't feel like dying. That's the reason we left the family in the first place.
Harlan: *Hears a car* What's that? *Looks out the window*
Vito: What is it?
Harlan: A cop.

The three stallions started to panic, but Vito had a plan.

Vito: I think I know what to do. Go upstairs and let me handle this.
Police Pony: *Rings the doorbell*
Vito: *Opens the door* How can I help wewe officer?
Police Pony: We got a complaint a while ago. Apparently this morning, some ponies had a gunfight just in front of your house. wewe know anything about this?
Vito: No. I was riding...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
What to expect in this episode.

Twilight Sparkle: *In a black convertible, kubadilishwa with two Royal Guards. A bullet hits the door of the convertible, kubadilishwa they're in*
Royal Guard: Princess, get down!

---

Captain Jefferson: Someone tried to assassinate the princess as she entered our town.

---

Twilight: Why would somepony want me dead?
Toby: That's what we're trying to find out.

---

Tim: *Gets punched three times kwa a blue unicorn. He gets punched one zaidi time, and his glasses break*

Intro
Song: link

Julia: *Driving her police car on the round freeway*
Tim: *Sitting inayofuata to her*

Gran Turismo

Starring Larry Wilcox as Tim...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
What to expect in this week's episode.

Tim: You're splitting us up?
Captain Jefferson: Just until Saturday. Someone's gotta teach the new guys what to do.

---

Pony: *Driving a sports car* Turn on the nitrous.
Pony 2: *Turns on the nitrous*
Pony: *Going faster*

---

Captain Jefferson: These two guys are wanted kwa the State Troopers, both in this state, and in Pennsylvania.
Tim: *Driving after the bad guys*
Captain Jefferson: We gotta be on our game.
Tim: *Hits another car, and goes on two wheels*

Song: link

Julia: *Driving her police car on the round freeway*
Tim: *Sitting inayofuata to her*

Gran Turismo

Starring...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
When Saten Twist returned to Los Angeles in the Super Chief, he saw Jake looking at him.

Jake: *Angry*
Saten: *Sweating* Why is he giving me that look? *Stops the train*
Jake: *Tapping his left front hoof on the ground, waiting for Saten Twist*
Saten: *Climbs down from the engine's cab* Why are wewe angry at me?
Jake: wewe owe me an apology for the way wewe talked to me yesterday.
Saten: John-
Jake: IT'S JAKE!!!!
Saten: Why are wewe getting angry at me all of a sudden?
Jake: Your lecture towards me made me lose my job, and now I can't find work anywhere else.
Saten: wewe quit?
Jake: Yeah. I'm still waiting...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
 Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see!
Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see!


Song: link
 Celestia: *Runs from the left. She jumps up, her wings spreading wide, then her face gets into the triangle*
Celestia: *Runs from the left. She jumps up, her wings spreading wide, then her face gets into the triangle*


Albuquerque, New Mexicolt. July 19th, 1958

Saten Twist: *Walking towards the Super Chief*
Stallion 16: Here to take this train all the way to Los Angeles?
Saten Twist: *Nods, and climbs into the cab*
Conductor: All aboard!!
Saten Twist: *Blows the horn twice, and makes the train go forward*
 This is the train Saten Twist is driving, called the Super Chief. A luxury train for ponies.
This is the train Saten Twist is driving, called the Super Chief. A luxury train for ponies....
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Oh shit, BT's not making fun of someone this time around? (well in an indirect way I might be but let's see where this goes)

Yeah, I don't care if anyone reads this, I just want to get this off of my chest, because I'm gonna try and be real with this site for once and it's 1 AM in the morning.

One thing I've noticed in the time that i've been a part of this club (since like, 2012 au something, idk), is that this club has Lost its backbone. The hivi karibuni year, now, I've been shitposting like mad, pissing in everyone's cornflakes. I have admittedly been the worst kind of person, for NO good reason....
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added by NocturnalMirage
Source: facebook, EQD
posted by SomeoneButNoone
My name? Alonzo Langusa. Age when I started operating? 23.


Act II

Vengeance...

Living was hard. I had to hide my name. I had to find a good job yet there was not enough money. Life was rough and it was because of these man. Vincent Galar, Apollo Monetto and Angelo Vertezio. I was taught kwa ma'am Crossroad not to kill. Yet I wanted to. I wanted vengeance. At age of 15 I started smoking and further drinking at age of 17 until at age of 23 I was kicked from my apartment. I went to Canterlot to find my good old friend her name was Clara. When I came she was shocked. I still remember it.


"Who are you?"...
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posted by SomeoneButNoone
It was a cold night like this one when my father smoked his last cigarette in our family house. The night so cold even me myself did not want to go out. The time? As a kid wewe don't care about that. It was dark, and it was winter. krisimasi day. After Equestrian economical fall and industrial boom, everyone changed, the dirty mafias started to leak. My father was part of one of these. A high up. One of important people in Vertezio familia. Still on that night...

Act I

That Night...

"So how was your siku outside" Father asked me with a smile. "Good" was all I answered. I was 11 what could I say....
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added by NocturnalMirage
Source: Facebook
posted by SomeoneButNoone
Darkness - *burst into room* Bad news! Void was kidnapped!
Dan - What?!
Snowflake - Void...


----
Location - ???
---

Void - *wakes up strapped to some meza, jedwali covered with bandages* What the...
Nyx - Good siku VOID. I never thought wewe will be the first to feel truth.
Void - What are you- *looks at him and see big machine behind him*
Nyx - Ah wewe see this. My project. matunda of my reschearch. The best weapon ever. wewe know - cores are great aren't they. They stay alive for 20 years. But wewe know what is better in them. Their power. A sheer power that may songesha body au stimulate brain. And this sekunde thing...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Tim, and Julia returned to the police station.

Captain Jefferson: Tim Miller, and Julia Rose.
Tim: Hello Captain.
Captain Jefferson: I heard about your heroic act on Monday Avenue. Well done.
Julia: Don't give us all of the credit Captain. There were other officers as well.
Captain Jefferson: I understand. When I see them, I'll give them their congrats as well.
Tim: We still on stakeout tomorrow Captain?
Captain Jefferson: That's right. You're on stakeout until further notice.

Next day.

Tim: *Driving his fira, viper passing Local Consideration*
Julia: Let's check out The Highway.
Tim: *Turns right on Byer Lane*...
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posted by SomeoneButNoone
Epilouge.
----------------
5 Years later.
----
Canterlot
13th May
---
Sandman - 13th of may...
Mare - A really fearful siku huh?
Sandman - Damn right. I saw this city burn. I saw it die slowly.
Mare - It's okay. It's not rebuilded fully but it has buty it had before.
Sandman - Maybe but Eiffla tower won't be fixed. New York statue the same.
Mare - You're right on that...
---
Ice - Damn it's hot this may.
Fire - Yeah. It was quiet hot that siku too.
Ice - Damn right.

----
Colt - Dad tell me about the war!
Damien - Well your dad fought for city we live in - Canterlot. wewe know it was hard but your daddy wanted to...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Date: April 12, 1963
Location: Cheyenne Wyoming
Time: 8:46 AM
Railroad: Union Pacific

Stylo walked into the station, and was going to talk to Pete, when he came out of his office.

Pete: There wewe are Stylo. I need wewe to come here.
Stylo: Perfect. I was just on my way to see you. *Enters Pete's office*

They say down at Pete's desk

Stylo: Sir,
Stylo & Pete: If I may start fir-
Audience: *Laughing*
Stylo & Pete: It's fine, wewe can-
Audience: *Laughing*
Stylo & Pete: Wanna go first?
Audience: *Laughing*
Pete: wewe go first.
Stylo: Okay. I've had it with Mike destroying our stuff on this railroad....
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Theme song >>>> link

Taxi Ponies: *Driving taxi cabs to the station*

Ponies On The Rails

Starring

Pierce Hawkins "Hawkeye" From SeanTheHedgehog

Snowflake & Orion From Alinah09

Metal Gloss From DragonAura15

Railway Pony: *Driving freight train across a bridge going over the train tracks at the station.*
Metal Gloss: *Drives freight train under bridge*
Pony: *In the station, buying a ticket. As soon as he gets the ticket, he runs across the platform, and boards his train.*
Hawkeye: *Preparing train for departure*
Stylo: *Looking at orders on paper*
Hawkeye: *Blows horn twice*...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Lewis: *Playing cards with Andy, Bob, and Orion*
Shawn: Thanks for inviting us over wewe two.
Andy: You're welcome.

The doorbell rang.

Lewis: I'll get it. *Stands up* Don't wewe dare look at my cards.
Shawn: I'll make sure they don't Lewis.
Lewis: *Opens the door*
Pony 83: Yo, what's good homie?
Lewis: I'm playing cards with some friends. Can I help you?
Pony 83: Yeah man. wewe know Kyle Jordan? The gppony, pony that owns the Video Store?
Lewis: Yeah. What about him?
Pony 83: Earlier today, I went to his store, but it was empty. He didn't lock the door, and just left everything out like it was open. Now I know Kyle,...
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