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Alright, everyone, after getting a feel for the game and after being able to experience it at my own Marafiki home, and after hundreds of Youtubers have played it, and after many old mashabiki are still angry over it despite them wanting the franchise to go back to their horror roots, I will be talking about Capcom’s new horror game. It may have taken a long time to get to it, and it may have made people saltier than the Pacific Ocean, but it’s finally time I talk about this game. Let us all take a look at the return to horror game, Resident Evil 7: Biohazard



So as wewe can see, this game is greatly different from the classic Resident Evil game. First off, it’s in a first person perspective. No other Resident Evil game did this aside from Resident Evil: Survivor, and… I don’t want to talk about this game. In all Resident Evil games, wewe play as a cool special agent operative au something like that going after zombies and monsters and some terrorist who becomes a giant eyeball creature in the end. In Resident Evil 7, wewe play as an average guy named Ethan who is heading to Louisiana to find his wife, Mia, who has been missing for three years. When Ethan arrives to the last known location of Mia, he is met with her, but is also attacked kwa her due to her being under the influence of something… evil within the residence……. (Goddamnit). After meeting Mia, Ethan meets… The Bakers. The father, Jack, a man who can heal any of his injuries, no matter what they may be, and is strong enough to break through walls and rip cars apart. Marguerite, the mother who is prone to anger and manipulates bugs in the area. And last, the son, Lucas, who creates insane deathtraps like a sort of game. There’s also the grandma, but we’ll get to her later. There’s also a girl named Zoe who helps wewe along the way and is related to the Bakers, and just managed to avoid becoming like them. The Bakers are probably one of the most tragic Resident Evil characters out there, but we’ll get to them later. First, let’s talk about the gameplay.



In Resident Evil 7, wewe play as Ethan, and like I said, wewe aren’t some badass going around a zombie infested area. wewe aren’t suplexing evil cultists and roundhouse kicking carriers of Las Plagas au whatever. No, you’re just a guy who is looking for his wife and came to the wrong bayou. wewe aren’t made to be the perfect killing machine. wewe just have to survive, and try using weapons as best as wewe can. Though, for an average man, Ethan sure does know how to use dozens of guns. Than again, so does….. Every horror game protagonist ever. Aside from that, Ethan is able to carry limited items, but can increase his carrying space as the game continues. He also has a cassette tape to save his game, being similar to the typewriters from the older games. wewe don’t have limited saves on normal modes, but on harder difficulties, it is harder. The game also get’s rid of the linear levels like in later games and goes back to fullon exploration. Having to use the small environment to solve puzzles and avoid enemies? It sounds so much like the first Resident Evil game. And wewe know how much I upendo the first Resident Evil game. And seeing the franchise go back to that style really does make me happy. Even if we aren’t playing as a S.T.A.R.S. operative. Then again, I wouldn’t like seeing zaidi of Chris’s jacked to fuck body au Jill’s jiggle physics. So I think that this Ethan guy is pretty good, and he is. Just a normal guy who was at the wrong place at the worst possible time. He’s not as awesome as the other characters in the series, but he is a very good character to have in your horror game.



Okay, so let’s talk about some complaints I have with the game. I could say the story is nonsensical, but it’s Resident Evil. The story has always made no sense and the series has just kinda rolled with it ever since. What I can complain about, however, is that the game becomes pretty generous near the end. I understand that it’s a big boss coming up and lots of enemies are coming out, but the original Resident Evil was never this generous with it’s weapons. And Ethan just happens to know how to use all of these weapons. Then again, getting into a chainsaw duel with Jack prior to this kind of makes this point void. But what is still easy to criticize is the other types of enemies in the game. wewe thought the Bakers would be scary the entire game? Well, you’re right, but I guess they still needed something for wewe to kill. Introducing the Molded, the laziest enemy in a Resident Evil game. The Molded are just Regenerators, only they don’t really regenerate and they are killed easily with a shot to the head. I wouldn’t mind them too much, since they were creepy at first, but then wewe notice that this is ALL wewe fight. Just different versions of them. wewe got the ones that crawl on their legs, and then wewe got the fat ones that vomit. Other than that, they are just the same, and there is barely any difference. Just shoot them in the head and wewe will kill them easily. It’s not that hard. But, I can’t be too mad. These guys were clearly not the main focus. The Bakers were the main focus of Resident Evil 7, and I’m glad they were.



There is a lot wewe can see in these people, and how interesting and unique they are to the franchise. They are driven completely insane, but not under a parasitic life form like the ones from Resident Evil’s 4 and 5, and they sure as hell aren’t zombies. They live a… “normal” life in the house, despite their insane regeneration abilities, and just being insane in general. They are nearly unstoppable and are hard to kill, as wewe will mostly be avoiding them as the game goes on. Jack will chase wewe and attempt to beat wewe to death, and in one boss fight with him, will either run wewe down the a car au try to crash the car wewe are in into beams. It’s a great boss fight that has many different outcomes, and all of them are great. The sekunde time has wewe having to have a chainsaw battle with him as he spews Evil Dead nukuu until wewe kill him. Marguerite is definitely affected the most, her mood changing constantly from soft and caring to angry and violent, attacking with her large amount of centipedes and wasps, and probably having one of the grossest transformations in a Resident Evil game. Lucas is kwa far the least messed up… physically. Mentally, however, wewe could say Lucas is the most damaged of them all. Even before the events of Resident Evil 7, Lucas had already killed a boy, a local bully, who he trapped in the attic and left to starve to death. He even states that he was able to keep himself from falling victim to what his parents had fallen to, implying that he isn’t truly under any influence and is just insane. The SAW like games he makes don’t really help disprove that claim. But let’s get to what makes them truly tragic…. Also, I am spoiling the rest of the game here. So don’t continue if wewe want the game spoiled



So as it turns out, Mia is actually part of an organization who created a bio-weapon called Eveline. Eveline is a little girl who uses her powers to turn those around her into her minions through a sort of strange mold. As it grows, the people become zaidi and zaidi insane, and are devoted to her completely, doing everything she says and everything she wants. No matter what, they are stuck, and can’t even die, as shown kwa the Bakers, who have been stuck this way for years. Before wewe kill Eveline, wewe meet Jack again, but this time, he doesn’t want to kill wewe au attack. He actually is speaking with wewe and wants wewe to end his family's suffering kwa killing Eveline. It’s the first time we see him before he turned, and it’s kinda tragic. It’s made even worse in the DLC that was released for the game called Daughters where wewe see the family before they were turned evil kwa Eveline. Jack was a caring family man who served in the war, Marguerite was a loving mother and wife, Lucas was still a piece of shit as always, and Zoe was just an average girl. wewe see their typical days before they are turned kwa Eveline, and wewe see them trying to fight it off and trying to keep the rest of them from turning and it’s one of the most tragic stories wewe can tell. I’d go so far as to say the Bakers are just as tragic as Lisa Trevor from Resident Evil Remake. Yes, the little girl who was forced into experiments kwa a corrupt man as her father died in a hidden hole and her mother was slowly dying from experiments and was unable to die herself and forced to live as a creature without a family is almost as tragic as the Bakers’ story. That is damn good writing, right there, even if it’s from a game about zombies. And to be honest, Eveline, for how evil she is, is also just as tragic. As a bioweapon, she wasn’t able to experience anyone who cared about her, as if she got near anyone, they would turn and be made to be mindless killers, and she wanted to live a normal life with a family, but that never happened, and she ended up aging incredibly fast to where she became an old woman… Yes, the old woman wewe see in the Bakers estate is little Eveline. It sounds dumb, but trust me. It makes sense.



Resident Evil 7 is a game that truly did manage to go back to the horror roots. It has the creepy atmosphere, haunting music, disturbed characters, and a very nerve wracking story about it. But that’s just the main game. The DLC offers so much more, like survival mode, two new pieces of the story, and deadly blackjack to play against numerous characters. It truly is one of the most well done Resident Evil games. I can’t say it’s as good as Resident Evil Remake, probably because nostalgia won’t let me songesha on from it, but I can definitely say it’s one of the best Resident Evil games we’ve had in a long time. Even if there are many who say it’s utter garbage. But hey, at least Capcom is actually trying to make its iconic horror franchise good again. Isn’t that right, Konami? Take care.

100: Repo! The Genetic Opera



99: The Room
98: Monsters, Inc.
97: Cloverfield
96: Adventures of Tintin
95: Hobo with a Shotgun
94: Watchmen
93: Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy
92: Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World
91: Caroline
90: Army of Darkness



89: Kick-Ass
88: Despicable Me
87: Zombieland
86: Land of the Dead
85: Goldeneye
84: District 9
83: Monster House
82: Tropic Thunder
81: King Kong
80: American Psycho



79: Dawn of the Dead
78: The Thing
77: Beauty and the Beast
76: The Road to El Dorado
75: Inglorious Bastards
74: Cast Away
73: The Incredibles
72: The Corpse Bride
71: Lemony Snicket’s Series of...
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posted by Windwakerguy430
~Story~

The story follows Benedict, a young aged man who is sent to Purgatory, which looks like a simple 1960’s town, but with dead souls who resemble the deaths they faced. Benedict is soon met with Death, a simple entrepreneur who is unable to find out anything about Benedict, and can not find out if he is meant to go to Heaven au Hell. However, Death asks Benedict to try and do some good in Purgatory. However, the downside is, unlike earth, Purgatory is not at all safe, as people could be plucked out of it immediately kwa either an Angel au a demon, and that it is also nyumbani to the Seven...
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Now, I was always a gamer. Even when I was 7. However, I wasn’t as brave while playing games as I am now when I was 7. So, wewe can imagine that their were a lot of terrifying things. So, I am going to tell wewe all the things in games that scared me as a kid. Now, these are all going to be games I played when I was only 7. So, I am not going to put any of the horror games on this list. Also, no Giygas, au Mimi, because those would be too obvious. Sorry. And with all that said, lets start the list

 Boulders
Boulders


#10: Boulders from Crash Bandicoot - Yes, that’s right, I was such a wuss back...
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posted by Windwakerguy430
Chuck: (Sitting in room, with TV on)
Anchorman: And, in a turn of events, some serious shit went down in Fortune City. And I mean SHIT! Like "Holy crap, dozens of people are dying and no one is doing a damn thing" kind of shit. We will go to our field reporter, Rebecca Chan, who has zaidi on this crazy shit.
Rebecca: It is revealed that the zombies were released kwa someone, as an act of terrorism. The following video shows a man who we can not see his face at all, but, for story reasons, we will just assume its Chuck Greene.
Chuck: Oh, they alisema my name again. Man, I am real maarufu today.
Rebecca:...
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Now, I have played lots of horror games on the internet. There was Slender: The Arrival with its jump scares and Corpse Party with its psychological horror. But there is a game that mixes both of these together. That game is Five Nights at Freddy's.
Now, this game, is horrifying. And for once, in a good way. It has a lot of good backstory, and the plot is neat, and the actual gameplay is well done. But what really amazed me was the horror of the game. It has both jump scares and psychological horror. I won't talk about the jump scares much, but zaidi of the psychological horror, as the animatronics...
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Okay... This fanfic is so bad and so poorly written... That its just funny. The fanfic I am talking about, is Half Life: Full Life Consequences.
Believe of au not.... Okay, no one, not even myself, believes this, but Gordon Freeman actually has relatives. He has a dad named Henry and a brother named John. This shabiki fiction is all about how Henry saved a city with his son. Sounds promising, so how could they fuck it up... Well, how about some of the worst spelling and grammar in the entire world. I swear, its as if this fanfiction was written kwa a first grader. In fact, I should just onyesha you...
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posted by Windwakerguy430


It doesn’t take a lot to get my interest in some games. One of the most likely things that can sell me on a game is how good the art is. And it’s real damn good to see a game that has been carefully drawn, picture kwa picture, all to get down the perfect animation. And no game has ever gotten that style of hand drawn uhuishaji for each character like the classic Skullgirls.
Skullgirls is one of my inayopendelewa fighting games out there simply for hte style, but I like it for other reasons too, of course. Skullgirls takes place in a sort of 1930s esque city, where a fabled McGuffin known...
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posted by Windwakerguy430
~Part 1: Blue Moon~

(A silent night, snow falling from the sky, as a man walked down an alleyway. There was no sound. Nothing but the noises of someone running and panting, almost screaming. The running stopped, but the screaming was only zaidi frequent, as the mysterious man at the end of the alley walked into the frame, blocking path. In his hand, a tommy gun, with a drum at the side, held in his right hand, before lifting it into both hands. The figure screamed and panicked, trying to find an escape, but to no avail. It was only when the gun was fired did any light shine on the figure. A dirty,...
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posted by Windwakerguy430
Narrator: Are wewe looking for a dark, edgy, and serious anime. Well than get the hell out of here, because Death Note: The Re-Bridged is not for you. This time, we got zaidi suspense.
L: Should I add one sugar cube, au two…. oh, fuck it. I’ll use all of it
Narrator: We’ve got zaidi action
Security Guard: Hey, a bus… The wheels on the bus go ‘round and ‘round-
(Bus crashes into a building)
Narrator: And we got a motherfucking AFRO
Aizawa: ……. I don’t even know how to respond to that?
Narrator: Watch as Light eats all your fucking potato chips! Don’t miss it, au you’re punda is going down in the Death Note. Watch Light eat your fucking mother
link
Narrator: Oh, shit. Wrong show… Uh… Here’s Matsuda
Matsuda: Hey, I’m Ma-
Narrator: FUCK OFF, MATSUDA! Death Note: The Re-Bridged! Watch it! au don’t! Fuck you! Rated PG.
Best of SATEN TWIST: (Heroic Hothead/Reformed drunk/AppleJack's husband)

AJ: (shortly after kissing him on the lips) There's somethin' ah've been meaning ta tell ya.
Saten: *gasps* Oh god. Your breaking up with me.
AJ: What?
Saten: W Why would wewe kiss me, and then break up with me.. That is so crue-
AJ: *puts her hooves on him softly* Honey. Relax. Ah'm not breaking up with ya,
Saten: (nervously) Oh.. Right, I I knew that.. (takes a large sip from the bia still on the lamp meza, jedwali inayofuata to we're their sitting)

AJ: (nuzzling Saten lovingly)
Saten: Huh.. That's so adorable, your like a cat. Only cuter....
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Nate: (In car with Chris)
Chris: Are wewe sure its a zombie outbreak
Nate: Chris, take a look outside (Points at person getting eaten kwa zombie) How do wewe explain that
Chris: Well, this is New York. Lots of crazy crap happens. Maybe he's a drug pusher
Nate: CHRIS
Chris: Okay, okay, so it is a zombie outbreak. But, how am I supposed to deal with that. Zombie's are not normal
Nate: Oh, they are now
Chris: Where are we going anyway
Nate: Well, first, we need to get Emma
Chris: wewe mean that annoying bitch, kahaba with her breasts being the only thing good about her
Nate: Chris, just shut up before I kick wewe out...
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When I alisema I was going to review No zaidi Heroes 2, I meant it. When I discussed the awali game, I did mention that I may au may not review it. I alisema that because, wow, I have to pay double the price of the original game for NMH2. But, in the end, I did it anyway. Because I’m a sad person. But, regardless, here it is. This is a game no one expected would be made. No zaidi Heroes seemed like such a niche game that was fun, but nothing to warrant a sequel. But, low and behold, here it is: No zaidi Heroes 2: Desperate Struggle.



~Story~

Now, wewe all know that I upendo the first No zaidi Heroes...
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posted by Windwakerguy430
Hello, everyone. And welcome to Hidden Gems, where we take a look at games that have fallen into obscurity that no one has heard of, and see if those games deserved to be forgotten of it they should be zaidi well known. And for the first episode of Hidden Gems, I want to talk about one of the best and most beloved obscure games out there. We all known Ubisoft for making games such as Assassin’s Creed, Far Cry, and a bunch of very buggy and untested games. But when less maarufu games, they seem to be less buggy and zaidi fun, such as games like No zaidi Heroes, Red Steel, and today’s game,...
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 Art kwa Alinah_09
Art by Alinah_09
When I was taking Topical Literature classes back in my junior mwaka of high school, we had this assignment where we had to watch a neo noir film and write down what we can find about the characters and the settings that give it that feeling. There was one movie I chose out of all of the. Mainly due to the fact that I have had a long history of enjoying this movie very much, for it’s dark setting, and it’s disturbingly creative villain… Not sure why I brought up my school assignments into this, but anyway, let’s talk about Silence of the Lambs… Oh, that’s why I talked about it. Because...
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I like to think of myself as a pioneer when it comes to gaming, going beyond the boundaries to try and discover what lies behind them. It could be something amazing, au could be something completely strange. Lost games are something that fascinates me. Lost games are games that are completely gone within just a few days. They come into our lives, stay for a bit, and disappear without a trace. I like to imagine Lost games as being different from cancelled games, because then I’d be thinking of Silent Hills and how bastardized of a company Konami is. But, anyway, this orodha is all about games...
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Now, there are a lot of enemies in video games. And I means a LOT! However, there are also the ones that are… terrifying. Now, before I start, some rules. These are only games that I played and only one per franchise. Also, I AM including enemies from horror games, as long as they are scary. Also, they need to have originated from video games, so that means that Slender Man, SCPs, and the Aliens from the Alien games are all out. Now, lets start the list.

 Big Sister
Big Sister


#20: Big Sisters from Bioshock 2 - Now, these enemies aren’t all that scary themselves. Its zaidi of the backstory of them...
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-Chapter 1: An Unforgettable Luncheon

Ring ring.
The doorbell rang. Superintendent Chalmers stood outside, champagne in hand, as he waited patiently. Seymour opened the door, greeted kwa his employer, who greeted him with a monotone voice
“Well, Seymour, I made it”, Superintendent Chalmers said, “Despite your directions”
“Ah, Superintendent Chalmers! Welcome!” Seymour exclaimed with a smile. “I hope you’re prepared for an unforgettable luncheon”
“Eh”, Chalmers exclaimed in a rather bored tone. He invited himself in, taking a kiti, kiti cha at the table, placing the champagne into the...
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posted by Windwakerguy430


So, Final ndoto VI was a good RPG on the SNES. I hear a lot of people say that it is the best. But that can’t be true. Undertale was based on Earthbound, not Final ndoto VI, so how can it possibly be the best when the best game ever wasn’t inspired kwa it. Okay, but seriously, this joke is terrible. Here’s Chrono Trigger.
Chrono Trigger takes place in the modern day… of 1999, following Crono, a bright eyed little Akira Toriyama drawn boy who, along with his friends, are send through an adventure across time to stop a space parasite known as Lavos from destroying the world in...
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So I was never too big into sports, and in short, I was never too big into sports games. I have minor understanding of basketball, but only cause my brothers are fans, I never understood the appeal of football, and I think I won’t offend anyone when I say soccer is boring. But I was really interested in the art of skateboarding… until it died and no one cared anymore… The game is Tony Hawk’s Underground.
Tony Hawk’s Underground starts in good ol’ Shithole, New Jersey, where wewe play as a skater with huge ambitions to be a pro skater, not for money, not for fame, but for the...
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posted by Windwakerguy430


I like Bayonetta better than Devil May Cry… Fuck you, fight me. Let’s not waste another sekunde and let’s talk about it.
Bayonetta follows, well, Bayonetta, an Umbra Witch who was sealed in a coffin five hundred years zamani before she resurfaced, with no memory of her passed and a legion of Heaven’s angels hunting her down. So, with the help of bar tender and badass Rodin, scumbag Enzo, and totally not Yuri Lowenthal, Luca, she travels to a far off city in hopes of getting answers, while also killing as many angels as she can. So like I alisema before, Bayonetta is fucking awesome. You...
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