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posted by Canada24
So.. Uh.. Yeah.. I upendo Key and Peele.. And too like this movie, wewe need too upendo this humour, other wise it'll be just like any other, stupid, cliched comedy. Witch dick jokes, swearing, guns, and stereotypes..

So.. First.. A little background.

Keagen Michael Key and Jordan Peele were originally cast against each other so that fox, mbweha could pick one black cast member (cause there's NOTHING racist about that).

but both ended up being picked after demonstrating great comedic chemistry.

Eventually the two created their OWN series.. Key and Peele.
Each episode of the onyesha consists mainly of several pre-taped sketches starring the two actors. The sketches cover a variety of societal topics, often with a focus on American maarufu culture, ethnic stereotypes, and race relations.

Keagen had won 2 awards, and was nominated 12 times.

Same for Peele. Who also does stand up, but other than that, he does very little outside of Key and Peele. As where Key can be seen in many many sinema as minor characters, and usually being the best part of alisema movie.. Cause most of them are awful..

So, now, lets do the movie staring AND directed kwa Key and Peele.

As usual, I'll repast the plot of the movie.. So here we go..

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Smoke and Oil Dresden (played kwa Key and Peele in one of their left over costumes from the tv show), are a pair of professional assassins known as the "Allentown Boys", who enter a drug-processing facility run kwa a Mexican drug cartel and kill everyone inside, including the boss King Diaz. The assassins take take Diaz's baby kitten, Iglesias, but when they are momentarily distracted kwa policemen arriving, the cat escapes.

Meanwhile, Rell (Peele) has just been dumped kwa his girlfriend; and while soaking, and smoking weed, because of coarse he does, he finds Iglesias on his doorstep, believes it too be a stray and adopts it, calling it Keanu.

Rell's cousin Clarence (Key) comes over to cheer him up and meets Keanu as well. Making that humourish face we see in the trailer and calling it "the cutest cat he's ever seen in his life".

Two weeks later, Clarence's wife, Hannah (Nia Long) and their daughter go out of town with the husband and daughter of a family friend, leaving Clarence alone.
Rell, who is much happier after taking care of Keanu and making a cliche calendar with it, kwa taking various picture, takes Clarence take him out to see a Liam Neeson movie, telling Clearence he needs too loosen up.

But when the two return to Rell's house, they find the place has been ransacked and Keanu is missing. A distraught Rell drags Clarence along to the next-door residence of his weed dealer Hulka (Will Forte), who is blackmailed (by Rell threatening too destroy Hulka's favourite muziki albums) into revealing that the 17th St. Blips, a local gang, may have raided Rell's house instead of his, and directs them to a downtown strip club.

Rell and Clarence reluntantely go there, where Rell convinces Clarence to adopt a "gangsta" persona in order to infiltrate the gang; they call themselves "Tectonic" and "Shark Tank". The two meet Hi-C (Tiffany Haddish), who initially is skeptical of them, but nonetheless takes them to meet the gang's leader Cheddar (Method Man), who mistakes them for the Allentown Boys.

Cheddar has Keanu (having renamed him New Jack), and Rell asks for the cat, offering money, but keeping in character.

Cheddar will only do give over the cat, if they come along as expert advisors for the Blips on a run to sell a new drug called "Holy Shit"; they both reluctantly agree.

After taking their team through a team-building exercise, Rell, Clarence, Hi-C, and three other gang members drive to their delivery spot. While Clarence stays behind and introduces the young men to the muziki of George Michael (whom he describes as if he were black, to overcome their skepticism), Rell and Hi-C go to make the sale; the buyer turns out to be Anna Faris, who is partying with two friends. Faris invites them to play Truth au Dare; she dares Hi-C to shoot Rell. When Hi-C refuses, a fight ensues in which Faris and her two guests are both shot and killed kwa Hi-C, traumatizing Rell.

Later at the strip club after the run, Clarence accidentally smokes some Holy Shit, and experiences a drug trip in which he appears in a George Michael video, and Keanu speaks to him in the voice of Keanu Reeves (obviously for ironic reasons).

Rell begins to worry about his cousin and convinces him to just take Keanu and leave. The two do so, but are abducted on their way to their car kwa the REAL Allentown Boys. Who tie Rell and Clarence to chairs and prepare to torture them, but Keanu claws through Rell's ropes, allowing him to free himself and Clarence, and they grab the Allentown Boys' guns. The Allentown boys continue to approach them, but Clarence and Rell panic and completely unload the guns into them, seemingly killing them, and horrifying Rel and Clarence at the fact they done so.

On their way out of the building searching for Keanu, Rell and Clarence run into the Blips; Cheddar has discovered their real identities from a kidnapped Hulka, and forces them to come along to a meeting with the Mexican drug cartel at its mansion in the morning. At the meeting, the Blips meet with King Diaz's cousin bacon (Luis Guzmán), offering Clarence and Rell as the supposed Allentown Boys, but when bacon also demands "Iglesias", Cheddar refuses and starts a gunfight between the two gangs. Clarence and Rell realize that the team-building exercise the two took the gang through has improved their communication; they pick up guns and shoot their way out of the mansion in pursuit of Bacon, who has taken Keanu, only for Rell to be shot in the leg and Clarence shot in the hand.

Rell – who doesn't have a driver license – hijacks Bacon's escape car with bacon and Keanu in the back; Clarence gives chase in a car that belongs to Bacon's son. The chase ends at Clarence's house, where Rell crashes into the front yard, sending bacon flying through where the windshield of the car would have been, had it not been removed in the chase. bacon gets up and attempts to shoot Rell, but Clarence runs him over. bacon gets up again, but is shot and killed kwa Cheddar and the Blips. The Blips threaten Rell and Clarence, but Hi-C – secretly a police officer – breaks her cover and forces the Blips to drop their guns. When Cheddar attempts to shoot her, she kills him. The police arrive, and Hi-C reveals that Faris and her party guests were in on the whole operation and are all still alive, but Rell and Clarence will still have to go to jail for the activities they've taken part in, including the killing of the Allentown Boys; she promises to testify for leniency and agrees to go on a tarehe with Rell after they get out of jail.

Six months later, Rell and Clarence have only three weeks left on their jail sentences, but have commanded respect among the inmates – including the remaining Blips – for killing the Allentown boys. Hi-C, who has been taking care of Keanu, speaks with Rell through a visitation phone, where she reveals that she's just been to the veterinarian and discovered that Keanu has a rare disease: he will remain a kitten permanently.

In a post-credits scene, the Allentown Boys are revealed to have survived the shooting and get back into their car.

So.. What do wewe think?
Sound good?

Cause it's what I expected.. In a good way..
 Rob Zombie
Rob Zombie
AMERICAN WITCH:

(This is a journey meant for your anxiety
This is a journey meant for your anxiety
This is a journey meant for your anxiety
This is a journey meant for your anxiety).

Body of a monkey, and the feet of a cock!
Dragged from her home, on the killing rock!
Black dog dying, on the weather vain!
The Devil's in a cat, and the baby's brain!

The end!
The end!
Of the American!
The end!
the end!
Of the American!
The end!
The end!
Of the American!
The end!
The end!
Of the American!

Witch!

(Noo! No! No! NOOOOO!)

Alone on the hill, and ready to die!
Cancer of darkness, blacken eye!
The mark of the wolf, and the...
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added by Dreamtime
MASTER SWORD:

Sword: (writing fanfic of Derpy, but then Saten comes in and he switches it too porn, of all things)..

Saten: How do I know wewe won't shoot me in the eye
Sword: (literary aiming a sniper gun at Saten's eye) No, no, I won't shoot wewe in the eye..

Sword: Let's look at the bright sides... Saten not being drunk, bright sides.

Sword: GODDAMN IT, CHIMNEY, SHUT THAT FUCKING REPEATING BROKEN RECORD wewe CALL A MOUTH!

Sword: Whats with the knife!? Please tell me that's going to be used for non-stabbing me purposes!

Sword: Oh, and I should apologize,. I guess when I saw Derpy getting hurt I just...
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posted by Canada24
Okay..

I know I am not nearly the review WindWaker is,
And that my reviews aren't usually lessoned to.

But I am making this huge punda review anyway..

This story is complete bullshit.
Everything about it dosen't even make sense.

Here's "my verison" of what happens.

Jeff (insert last name here) is a completely normal, unviolent, average boy.
Who is the victim of bullying.

Obviously bullying is bad.
There's no joke about how terrible bullying is.
And that causes people to kill themselves (not even joking).

But sense this is a creepypasta, and most creepypastas don't make fuckin sense to me.
Jeff decides, instead...
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DEATH NOTE:
It looks interesting so maybe the dozens of people asking might get what they want :D


MONSTER:
Yeah.. Again, dozens of requests.. I think I will at some point..


DRAGON BALL Z:
I would. But I have trouble finding it..


HELLSING ORGINAL:
Someday maybe, but most OTHER people say there's not much need. It's not very good..


BLACK LAGOON:
I tried.
It's great. But too many cliche's for me.
And the voices ruin it for me..



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When wewe watch the zaidi serious films, Freddy Krueger IS something that can be considered actually scary.

First off, dreams are suppose to be a salama place.
And what makes the orginal so scary, is the fact that the dream sequences themselves look and feel so spooky.
Something the remake ALSO fails at.

Freddy dosen't just suddenly appear, like in the remake.
He quietly calls out your name, he makes wewe feel uneasy.
And than when he dose appear in the original, most times we see him like this..



Yeah, he's in the shadows. He's mysterious.
In fact, Freddy can be compared to Steven King's IT.
He...
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#1:
"I am honored to be the first CEO of a private corporation to become a member of the United Nations Security Council. Unfortunately, my appearance today has been clouded kwa a flurry of speculation that my company is developing a weapon of mass destruction which would be capable of targeting specific ethnic groups. I want to address these allegations head on. Are we developing such a weapon? No we are not. Because we've already developed it. But with all due respect, the United Nations is a relic from a different time when nations were unique in their ability to solve the world's problems....
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#1:
AVGN: wewe know what's really weird? That this game was actually capable of a 4-player mode using an accessory that allows four controllers to be connected to your Nintendo Entertainment System? Now, I can't imagine having four people playing this game. Who's gonna want to play this piece of shit? I'm lucky if I can get one other person! I have a better chance of cloning myself. (four Angry Video Game Nerds play and curse at the same time)
AVGN 1: Hey, wait. Wait, wait, wait. I just cloned myself. I'm in a dream, I can do whatever I want, so why don't we all just stop playing this fucking...
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Nobody has ever made this list.
And now that I'm hooked to him again, I decided to do it myself. Dreamtime says I can make people like bands somehow.. So maybe this will help.

A lot of people don't talk about this guy. Probably cause he is in fact an actual Satanist.
And most of his songs are about black magic and the devil himself.

I do admit that's a bit disturbing for me, as an Christian. But I don't judge people on this stuff..

-------------------------------------------------------------------

#1: EVIL:
It may not be very good. But it introduced ME to him.
So may as well add it as number 1.


#2:...
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added by Dreamtime
Source: deviantart
SATEN TWIST:
Although he usually means well. Saten Twist isn't always as innocent as the other my little gppony, pony characters. He's been known to kill 3 people (though non of them were on purpose).
Saten often reveals to have had a very bad childhood, his father was abusive to him and his mother, and his mother was emotionally distant, never inaonyesha him any true signs of love. As a result, Saten has grown into a recovering alcoholic, who sometimes takes weed, and has strong temper issues witch often makes him unpredictable, and sometimes even sadistic.
However, he is also shown to be quite immature...
continue reading...
posted by Canada24
 Gotta upendo Anderson
Gotta love Anderson
Sup?

This I actually such a AWESOME series.
I was too hard on the first episode, I'd have to rewatch it sometime.

But anyway.
As wewe can tell kwa the picture, I am really taking a likeness towards Anderson.
He is so cool to look at.

But I'm also starting to take likeness towards The Major.
He is such a deep character, and makes for an amazing villain.
Not to mention, he's a good villain, because he, what to me, defines TRUE evil.
The type of peron who only wants to see the world burn, there's no reasoning with him.

Though unfortantly, I am starting to have LESS enjoyment towards Alucard.
He may be on...
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posted by Canada24
 R.I.P
R.I.P
#1:
Billy: Then answer the God damn question. Why the fuck haven't wewe gotten it back for me, friend-brother?
Johnny: One word: business. Like I told wewe when wewe were in there, au were wewe so busy playing holier-than-thou wewe started believing your own bullshit?
Billy: GET! MY! BIKE!
Johnny: What am I!? YOUR FUCKIN DOG!?


#2:
Brian: Please Johnny, I'm bagging yo-
Johnny: (points a pistol at Brian's head) SHUT UP BRIAN! For once in your life do NOT be a pussy!... (ready to pull the trigger) wewe GOTTA TAKE IT LIKE A MAN!


#3:
Johnny: I like you, Ray. Still keep your humor in the midst of an almighty...
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Basically, Carrie, a normal girl. Except she has tele- I don't know. That thing where wewe songesha shit with your mind (it's never explained why she has it, wewe just kind of role with it). experiences her first period as she showers with other girls after gym class (not as sexy as wewe might think).

Unaware of what is happening to her, Carrie panics and pleads for help. The other girls, rather trying too comfort like normal human beings, begin laughing and bullying her.
Cause, wewe know, mental breakdowns are hilarious.

The gym teacher breaks up the commotion and attempts to console Carrie, a light...
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It's hard to get a good sequel these days.

And this one is way better than the sequels to to Jaws and Insidious.

The first one is simple enough. Ethan Hawke plays a true crime novelist who discovers a box with a camera in it. The camera displays snuff films of family's being murdered in fashions that are labeled "jokingly" in the names.
The "joke names" come across as twisted and sadistic (and not in a good way).
Anyway, long story short.
Turns out a evil demon, named Bughuul is behind it all. and Bughuul decides to mess with Hawk's character for a while, kwa scaring the audience with various jump...
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#1:
Link: Hey.. Wanna get high Majora? *shows joint*
Majora: I.. I can't
Link: Why?.. Are wewe a wussy?
Majora: *getting annoyed* No, I mean I LITERARY can't!
Link: Wussy!
Majora: *angrily* No, I mean I don't have a fucking blood stream!
Link: I know.
Majora: Than why were wewe calling me a wussy!?
Link: Cause.. Your just so easy to anger, it's hilarious.
Majora: *angrily* I am NOT easy to anger! How dare yo-... *calms down* I mean..
Link: *sarcastically* No, no, keep going.. wewe were doing a GREAT job of proving me wrong.


#2:
Link: What's your story?
Majora:Well, there's much to say.. I'm a god of evil...
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MONSTER PART 5:

So, watched episodes 11 and 12..
Least something interesting happened again.

I kinda "called it" when the guy was abusing the kid the moment the kid entered the room. Obviously something was wrong.

But these two certainly were intense.. All without anyone actually dying.
It's like that Liam Neeison movie, NON-STOP. It's so intense and action packed. But yet there's little to no actual action sequences.
That movie Prisoners is the same.

Anyway. Lohan certainly is a "interesting" character.
No idea what to make of him.

Though the man crying was kind of brought me mentally down.
But...
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