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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Mortomis was currently working as a cashier at ShopRite.

Customer: *Gives Mortomis a one hundred dollar bill* Thank you.
Mortomis: Thank you. Have a good day. *Looks around, and sees that no one is looking at him. He sticks the hundred dollar bill into his pocket*
Audience: *Laughing*
Mortomis: Tom, and all of the others are idiots. I told them that being a cashier is awesome, and they don't believe me.
Saten Twist: *Appears with two boxes of Cookie Crisps* Hey, how's it going?
Mortomis: Good, and you?
Saten Twist: Fine. Tell me, when did wewe get this job?
Mortomis: Yesterday.
Saten Twist: wewe know being a cashier is stupid, right?
Audience: *Laughing*
Mortomis: Somepony has to do it.
Saten Twist: Fair enough.
Ponies: *Forming a line behind Saten Twist* Hurry up with your kuki, vidakuzi asshole!
Saten Twist: Go buy zaidi shit wewe don't need, and get poor wewe dicks!
Audience: *Laughing*
Saten Twist: I also heard from Tom, and Master Sword that somepony maybe working as a cashier in order to steal money. Is it possible that wewe know who I'm talking about?
Mortomis: *Looks down at the floor* No.
Saten Twist: Look me in the eye!
Mortomis: *Looks Saten Twist in the eye, keeping a straight face* No!! For accusing me of doing something like that, the price of your kuki, vidakuzi will double.
Audience: *Laughing*
Saten Twist: *Leaves*
Mortomis: *Looks at the kuki, vidakuzi he left behind* Oh well. I heard these were good. Next?
Pony: *Arrives* I have six bananas, five boxes of Lucky Charms, a hotwheels Camaro, four pieces of chicken, and season 7 of Ponies On The Rails on DVD.
Mortomis: Okay, let's see how much that costs.
Manager: *Arrives* au not.
Audience: *Light laughter*
Mortomis: What?
Manager: Come with me, and you'll find out what I'm talking about.
Mortomis: Can I deal with this customer first?
Manager: No.
Audience: *Light laughter*

They went into the manager's office.

Manager: I heard rumors that wewe have been stealing money from our cash registers. Is this true?
Mortomis: It's a rumor, it's not supposed to be true.
Audience: *Laughing*
Manager: Okay wewe two, come in.
Tom & Master Sword: *Arrives*
Mortomis: What are wewe two doing here?
Tom: We videotaped wewe before Saten arrived.
Mortomis: He was in on this?
Master Sword: No, he would have recreated Pearl Harbor if we let him jiunge us.
Audience: *Laughing*
Manager: These two sent me a video of wewe during work. I saw it, and I am not happy.
Mortomis: I know, cut to the chase, and let me get back to work.
Audience: *Lightly laughing*
Manager: wewe aliiba money from our cash registers. wewe are fired.
Mortomis: Excuse me for a moment while I get my Tommygun.
Audience: *Laughing*

Coming up inayofuata on the last part, it's the bloopers.
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Victor & JJ had a brand new Flam Wrestler that was modified with 600 horsepower. They were about to see how fast it could go on a straight stretch of road.

Victor: *Revs the engine* Alright, wewe ready?
JJ: As ready as I'll ever be!
Victor: Here goes nothing! *Floors it, and quickly goes over 70 miles an hour*
JJ: This is really fast!
Victor: Yeah, but we're losing traction whenever we switch gears! *Shifts into 3rd, and starts to swerve* This is not working well!! *Loses control, and stops in a ditch*

It quickly got dusty inside the car.

JJ: *Coughs twice*
VIctor: *Slams his hoof on the dashboard*...
continue reading...
added by TimberHumphrey
added by triq267
Source: KodokunaShiroiOkami
posted by SomeoneButNoone
---
Dan - I know that Hooffman is dead but I need wewe to do something.
Ghost - Soldiers don't cry. And we can get revenge on GlobeX and get pleased.
Dan - Great. I need wewe to go back to the base wewe used thanathos in. They are about to launch an Nuclear kombora, yamuua into Canterlot. wewe HAVE to stop them.
Ghost - Got it sir.


- - - -
Siberia - Russia.
GlobeX Arizone.
Hour 1932
Operation Codename : "Jet Fuel"

-----

Ghost - Jump jump jump!
Hardscope - *parachute down* All here?
Blaze - Aye. Let's move.
Ghost - This place is awfully cle-
GlobeX - *shoot at them*
Ghost - Ambush!
-23rd of May-
Hardscope - Mother... *throw...
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added by Jade_23
Source: DeviantArt, Equestria Daily
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Adrenaline soon returned to Don Castalini's house with Larry in the beetle.

Larry: *Sees three black El Doritos parked in front of Don Castalini's house* Well it looks like we got some company.
Adrenaline: Guess we should be prepared for something.
Larry: Yeah, it looks like the Don has another job for us, with several zaidi ponies in our gang.
Adrenaline: Sounds like fun.

But as they got out of the car, a gppony, pony in the house shot at them with a Tommygun

Larry: *Taking cover behind the fence* What is this?!!?
Scaletta Pony: We have your boss! Come in with your hooves up!
Larry: Usually, it's come...
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posted by SomeoneButNoone
Episode 2
Exploration of Power.

---
Queen - Welcome to the Heroes tourna-

*preparing room*
Shadowknight - *looks at hoofs*
Pearl - Don't worry however you'll do I will be proud.
Shadowknight - Hehe... (Hearing it from child's mouth feels weird)
Pearl - hujambo I know his weakness!
Shadowknight - Hm?
Pearl - When he lunge he is making and opening in center of his body, if wewe hit it book he is down and wewe win yaaay!
Shadowknight - I can exploit that...

-arena-

Angel - At last.
Shadowknight - Tch...
Emerald - Don't kill him...
Angel - I'll try.
Shadowknight - You'll be the one dying today *grabs sword*
...
...
...
Queen...
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added by Windwakerguy430
At a Freedom Fighter base.

Freedom Fighters: *Working on computers, and organizing paperwork*
Sally Acorn: *Inspecting the base*
Freedom Fighter: *Walks over to her* Princess Sally, I regret to inform wewe that Eggman keeps attacking more, and zaidi of our bases.
Sally Acorn: We're not making much progress.
Freedom Fighter: And I have zaidi bad news. Sonic is still prisoner on Eggman's Super Ridiculously Big Yacht.
Sally Acorn: We must save him immediately.
Freedom Fighter 72: General, Doctor Eggman has appeared on my screen.
Freedom Fighter 55: He's on mine too!
Freedom Fighter: *Looks around*...
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added by NocturnalMirage
Source: (facebook, joyreactor)
added by NocturnalMirage
Source: (facebook, joyreactor)
posted by Seanthehedgehog
 My OC Larry Wilcox stars as the main character, Tim Miller
My OC Larry Wilcox stars as the main character, Tim Miller
Map to the town of Gran Turismo: link

Gran Turismo. A city full of wealth, and ponies that upendo cars. Most of these ponies are either illegal mitaani, mtaa racers, au cops. This is based off of the Gran Turismo video games, when wewe go online, there are these lobbies where people play as cops.

Now if wewe take a look at the map, wewe will see blue squares. Those are police stations.

Red squares are moto departments, and white squares are hospitals.

Yellow triangles are autoshops. The one with the red center is Local Consideration, maarufu for it's high quality parts at a fair price.

The brown lines are...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Jon, and Frank were riding back to Canterlot Highway Patrol headquarters.

Frank: I've been waiting three days for that car man!
Jon: Ponch, relax. You're going to get it tomorrow.
Frank: That's too far away for me. If that car was a mare, it would be Kate Upton.
Jon: wewe upendo it that much?
Frank: Yes. I can't wait to drive it.
Jon: *Looks ahead of him* Let's just hope wewe don't drive like those ponies in front of us.

An accident occurred. A mustang crashed into a green SUV.

Jon & Frank: *Stop on the side of the road, inayofuata to a blue Alfa Romeo convertible*
Frank: What happened here?
Molly:...
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posted by Canada24
AppleBloom: Dosen't it feel like this idea has been used in a mature themed fanpop role play?... One that uses swears and unshown sex, every 2 minutes.

Scootaloo: (sarcastically) Sure.. inayofuata your say the role play has Saten Twist marry AppleJack.. When she directly told us, she had written 2 restraining orders after their ONE date.

SweetieBelle: Weirder things have happened.. There's a story about me sleeping with Rarity.

Scootaloo: Jeeze, what is wrong with pe-

Diamond Tiara: So, do wewe three just sit around here plotting out different ways to try and get your cutie marks?

Apple Bloom: Actually......
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
The Fillydelphia gang was talking with each other in a building in Oatland.

Fillydelphia gppony, pony 93: Those Mexicans have been fighting with Case Cracker's gang.
Fillydelphia gppony, pony 15: And our attack on Case wasn't successful. What do we do?
Michael: We try again. Only this time, we succeed.

Next siku

Gordon: *Wakes up* 5 AM. I usually wake up at 6, but whatever.
Case Cracker: *stays asleep at home*
Gordon: *Starts lifting weights*
Case Cracker: *Gets up a couple hours later*
Jim: *Calling Case Cracker*
Case Cracker: *Picks up* Hello.
Jim: We have a problem Case! Call Gordon, and Sam, and tell them to get...
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Master Sword: There wewe are! My suit has vanished and this was the only thing left in my closet! How do I look?

Derpy: Like a million bits!

Mayor Mare: But I also see so many ponies from all trots of life, brought together kwa love. Cranky searched all across this great land of ours to find Matilda, and no matter what obstacles kept them apart, upendo would finally bring them together, just as it has brought all of us together now. It's remarkable to me how a story like Cranky's tafuta for Matilda could fill this room with such a unique collection of ponies! It makes wewe realize that everybody is...
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added by glelsey
Source: Themrock @ DeviantART
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Princess Celestia

Starring Celestia, Luna, Twilight, and Derpy as theirselves
Blaze as Jonathan (For this skit, he's bald.)
Cosmic upinde wa mvua as Chrysler (For this skit, he has a mustache.)
Mortomis as Bryan
Saten Twist as Timothy
Double Scoop as Skeletor
Master Sword as Harry
Sophie Shimmer as Alexis
Astrel Sky as Jenny

Bryan was with two royal guards somewhere in Canterlot. They were meeting with three Mexican ponies.

Mexican Pony: You're late.
Bryan: All the matters is the fact that I'm here. The point being... Luna tells me wewe have a repository of antic equipment.
Mexican Pony: So what is...
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added by NocturnalMirage
Source: facebook, joyreactor, deviantart
added by NocturnalMirage
Source: joyreactor, facebook, deviantart