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1.We are men we like sex.......it is like a constant dog barking at the gate, we leash this dog in a relationship and give wewe the key.....if wewe dont feed, water, and give the dog a nyumbani he might break out....with this basic knowledge wewe can begin understanding men
2.Those cooments that wewe gossip and say we are soo cruel and misunderstanding.......we have a very weird sensor most things wewe are offended kwa we think we are complimenting you....
3.We dont mind going shopping with you, but there are rules.
A.dont drag us around like mbwa holding your bags and not give us a reward.....atleast contemplate a spontaneous erotic adventure in a changing room.
B.If wewe make us sit outside the changing room holding your purss, never expect us to come shopping again....that is if we are still there when wewe come out.......
C.take us into the dressing room with you, trust me we dont mind having to watch wewe strip down and put clothes on.....we may offer to help taking some things off.
4.We dislike having backseat drivers, the examiner for the driving test was about 30seconds from having road rash for most of us....
5.We like video games, dont hate.....we wouldnt mind if wewe practiced while we are gone so we can have that dream of a cool girlfriend thats good at CoD........If wewe want our attention with out grabbing a remote and joining wewe might need to shed a few layers.....
6.We like having surprise naked picha of yourself sent to us.....the naughtier the better.
7.If wewe cant cook but wewe insist on us eating the .....matter.....you have produced try wearing an apron.......just and apron....we wont notice the chakula we will be too busy trying to think of the 1 in a million ways to get wewe on juu of us w/ au w/o the apron....
8.We dont mind chick flicks but there are some rules...
A.you must never tell our Marafiki au anyone who knows our friends.
B.you must compensate us kwa watching an action movie, au compensation with sexual acts...
C.if wewe are bored kwa our movie please go ahead and play with our dog.....
9.WE CANT READ YOUR MINDS!!!Idk why but no woman believes this.....it is true if wewe dont instigate something au tell us to unleash the dog inside wewe we wont know! so for God's sake please tell us au drag us we wont care wewe could rip our clothes of and say thats mine and have your way.....
10.Whilest still upon the subject we enjoy being told what wewe want! because we cant read your minds.......so tell us where,when,and how hard wewe want it......
11.We dont mind being woke up in the middle of the night au in the morning kwa wewe but if wewe expect us to stay awake id suggest wewe either be on juu of us, grooming the dog, au sitting on our face.........not in the smothering way either!
12.Every guy has been trying to go green since indooor plumbing was invented so please save the planet and kuoga with us so we dont waste water.....
13.Being spontaneous is a good thing try it....if your man shuts wewe down trying to go down, au play with the dog......i think his gender will disown him.
14.Haircuts..........lets be honest due to the fact we are normally staring at your chest au your butt, we may need a little extra time to notice the haircut.
15.Ladies there is only one time we wont consider it cheating if your having sex with another person.........it is when it is yourself, your boyfriend and another woman...........
16.When we space out we are probably fantasizing about wewe doign things we want but wewe dont.....so dont be offended when we keep asking for them.....
17.We upendo getting compliments so tell us the dog is growing au something, whether its true au not.....
18.We are all kinky so any ideas wewe have spit them out because we might have been wanting to ask wewe to do that for months...
19.True fact women look good naked.........so stop worrying about how wewe look......because we like it....
20.No man would complain if he came nyumbani and saw wewe naked, playing with youself, au in a sexy outfit.
21.Dont complain to us about your shoes.........honestly does one pair matter if wewe have 50.....we have prolly 4 au 5.....
22.Whatever,fine,or i get it........are not good ways to end a discussion...
23.Dont smoke.............nuff said...
24.We are not made to be used as pawns in a game with your other girlfriends......
25.We dont mind if wewe come to kitanda naked so dont worry about having to pick which pjs to wear each night......
26.We are a proud species we like to have our backs rubbed litterally and figurativly....
27.We like knowing where wewe are because we worry about wewe not because we are controlling...
28.If wewe text us then drop off the face of the earth we assume the worst and will go on a rampage untill wewe text us again.....
29.Blue balls is the leading cause of death of relationships....
30.If we start sharing our feeling...blehh.....and wewe laugh au make a joke.....dont ever expect it to happen again even if wewe are in lingerie....
added by XxKeithHarkinxX
Source: Google
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added by i_luv_angst
Liquid Plummer
Warning: Do not reuse the bottle to store beverages.

Windex
Do not spray in eyes.

Toilet Plunger
Caution: Do not use near power lines.

Dremel Electric Rotary Tool
This product not intended for use as a dental drill.

Arm & Hammer Scoopable Cat Litter
Safe to use around pets.


Bowl Fresh
Safe to use around pets and children, although it is not recommended that either be permitted to drink from toilet.

Endust Duster
This product is not defined as flammable kwa the Consumer Products Safety Commision Regulations. However, this product can be ignited under certain circumstances.

Baby...
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added by PPGZMomoko
Source: Google
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Source: allin1hdwallpapers.com
posted by Mallory101
1. Make race car noises when anyone gets on au off.
2. Blow your nose and offer to onyesha the contents of your kleenex to other passengers.

3. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, dammit, all of wewe just shut UP!"

4. Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly.

5. Sell Girl Scout cookies.

6. On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the elevator.

7. Shave.

8. Crack open your briefcase, mkoba au purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?"

9. Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours...
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added by modernfan
Source: tumblr
added by adultswimperson
Source: Google
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Source: wallpaperswide.com
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added by ShadowFan100
Source: Idk
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added by TheLefteris24
added by TheLefteris24
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added by shaneoohmac13