Welcome to the block, where a group of ponies that are Marafiki live on the same block in Ponyville. And now for your hosts, Master Sword, and Tom Foolery.
Audience: *Cheering*
Master Sword & Tom: *Standing in front of a house*
Master Sword: hujambo everypony. Great to see wewe again.
Tom: Shut the f**k up.
Audience: *Laughing*
Master Sword: Tom, what was that for?
Tom: We need to forget about the jokes, and get things moving so the director won't get angry at us.
Master Sword: But we can't forget about jokes! This is a comedy show!
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: I never alisema we weren't going to do jokes.
Master Sword: Yes wewe did.
Tom: No I didn't.
Master Sword: Well I'm pretty sure wewe did.
Tom: Yeah, well that's your opinion.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Today's crossover parody, M*A*S*H Ponies On The Rails
Master Sword: And this is a crossover of.. Do we even have to say it? It's got both of the titles from the shows right there for you!
Audience: *Laughing*
For this crossover parody, the Season 3 Ponies On The Rails cast will be theirselves, but playing as the M*A*S*H ponies will be....
Tom Foolery as Captain Hawkeye Pierce
Saten Twist as Sargent Klinger
Double Scoop as Captain B.J Honnecut
Master Sword as Major Charles Emerson Winchester
Aina as Major Houllihan
and Mortomis as Colonel Potter
North Korea, 1953
One siku at the 4077th M*A*S*H unit, Captain Hawkeye was in the swamp with B.J.
Hawkeye: Oh, Beej. We've got too many wounded coming in here.
Honnecut: Beej. If wewe say that backwards, it's Jeeb.
Hawkeye: That's close enough to jeep.
Audience: *Laughing*
Winchester: *Walks in* What do wewe two think you're doing?
Hawkeye: Nothing.
Honnecut: I never knew the army would punish somepony for doing nothing.
Audience: *Laughing*
Winchester: Your humor fails to amuse me, but I will enjoy seeing wewe two get sent to the klink. One zaidi foul up, and you'll both be in the stockade for a long time.
Hawkeye: Klink? Stockade?
Honnecut: Make up your mind.
Audience: *Laughing*
Meanwhile, Colonel Potter was in his room talking on a telephone.
Colonel Potter: We need a new way to get patients from here back to their unit..... What's that?...... A Railway Line?..... Oh, it was just a joke..... Well, as soon as wewe find another way, let me know.... Adios.
Hawkeye: *Walks in Potter's room* Hello Colonel.
Colonel Potter: Don't any of wewe knock?
Hawkeye: What for? There's a war going on.
Audience: *Laughing*
Hawkeye: What's up?
Colonel Potter: Somepony just told me the dumbest joke. He thought it was funny to tell me that we'd make a Railway to take ponies from here to their unit. It just wastes too much time.
Hawkeye: *Getting an idea* Maybe it's not good as a joke, but it's good for another thing. *Leaves office*
Colonel Potter: What's that supposed to mean?
Meanwhile, in Cheyenne Wyoming, also in the mwaka 1953
Audience: *Laughing*
Pete: *Looking at telegram from Korea* I don't believe this!
Percy: *Walks into office* Sir? Everything okay?
Pete: No! We need to expand our line all the way to Korea!
Percy: wewe don't wanna go there. There's a war going on. *Leaves*
Audience: *Laughing*
Pete: Leave it to the army to screw things up.
Audience: *Laughing*
So the line was built all the way across the Pacific Ocean from San Franciscolt to Seoul. Then, it went all around the Equestrian Army's territory going to many M*A*S*H units, and army bases.
Major Houllihan: What is the meaning of all this?
Sargent Klinger: It's a Railway line.
A train was going across, but all of a sudden the bridge blew up.
Hawkeye: What happened?
Colonel Potter: That was one of ours!
Honnecut: What were they thinking?
Colonel Potter: They had no idea about this. Like I said, the army always screw things up.
Hawkeye: I have a feeling somepony alisema that before you.
Audience: *Laughing*
The End
On the inayofuata part of this episode, Tom Foolery, and Master Sword introduce us to zaidi ponies. Again.
They are...
Cosmic upinde wa mvua from Emo_Brony47
Heartsong from Scougesgirl
Annie from Ameliarose2002
Blaze from Liam_A_Ninja
Sophie Shimmer from Aquagirl445
Snow Wonder from Dragonaura15
Theme Song: link
Master Sword: Come on Tom, let's go meet the others.
Tom: Right behind you.
Double Scoop: *Standing on mitaani, mtaa corner*
Aina: *Runs out of her house*
Sunny: Hey, wait for me. *Flying in the middle of the street*
Saten Twist: *Polishing his chain saw, but stops to go meet the others*
Pleiades: *Arrives at corner*
Mortomis: *Standing inayofuata to Double Scoop*
Tom: zaidi ponies!!
Snow Wonder: *Arrives in a brand new Corvette*
Cosmic Rainbow: *Flies from the clouds*
Heartsong: *Climbs out of a manhole*
Annie: *Arrives on a bicycle*
Blaze: *Flies out of a house window, and lands inayofuata to Tom*
Sophie Shimmer: *Gets off of a slow moving bus*
All: We live together on the block!
Audience: *Clapping*
Announcer: Okay, stop the song! We need to keep this thing rolling.
Audience: *Laughing*
Episode 2: zaidi Introductions
Announcer: On The Block was filmed in front of a live audience.
Audience: *Laughing*
Announcer: Need I say more?
Audience: *Laughing*
Double Scoop: *Making a Jack-O lantern with an ice cream cone*
Snow Wonder: *Looking at Jack-O lantern* That looks really beautiful.
Double Scoop: Thanks. Have wewe ever wondered what the O stands for in Jack-O lantern?
Snow Wonder: No. What?
Double Scoop: Off.
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*
Snow Wonder: Okay. *Walks away*
Meanwhile at Blaze's house, he was playing Call Of Duty: Advanced Warfare with Cosmic Rainbow.
Cosmic Rainbow: This game wasn't supposed to come out until November. How did wewe get it?
Blaze: With a little persuasion.
Cosmic Rainbow: What kind of persuasion?
Blaze: The kind that risks lives.
Audience: *Laughing*
Cosmic Rainbow: *Gets shot* Wait, what the hell? I shot that guy seven times in the head, and he never died.
Blaze: That's ridiculous. wewe must have missed.
Cosmic Rainbow: How does one miss the head of a gppony, pony when shooting a gun?
Audience: *Laughing*
Blaze: I'm not even gonna bother arguing with wewe *His character falls through the ground* Wait, what the--
Cosmic Rainbow: Be prepared for the ultimate rage.
Blaze: FFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUU
He was shouting so loud that it was heard everywhere. It was heard in Manehattan, on the train to Canterlot, and it was even heard in China.
Chinese Pony: Sounds rike somepony is angry.
Chinese gppony, pony 2: Jawohr.
Chinese Pony: Stop trying to speak German.
Audience: *Laughing*
Back at Blaze's house...
Blaze: *Takes game out of PS4, and puts it back in case* This is stupid.
Cosmic Rainbow: What are wewe going to do?
Blaze: I am going to-
The doorbell rang.
Blaze: Hmm. *Brings game to the front door, and opens the door*
Colt: *Dressed up as a tree* Trick au treat.
Blaze: Here, have a videogame. *Gives game to Colt*
Colt: Awesome! *Runs away with game*
Audience: *Laughing*
Cosmic Rainbow: wewe gave a six mwaka old a rated M game?
Blaze: Have wewe ever tried giving a yo yo to a gppony, pony at the age of 67?
Audience: *Laughing*
Meanwhile at a retirement center.
Old Pony: *Tied up in yo yo* Oh fiddlesticks. I'll have to call Jimmy again. This is the 24th time I got stuck in this contraption.
Audience: *Laughing*
And now, it's time for fanmail from your inayopendelewa six ponies, the mane 6!
Audience: *Cheering, whistling, and clapping*
Announcer: Just one thing we need to tell you. Twilight Sparkle did something bad, and Celestia has punished her, kwa giving her the voice of Ice Cube.
Audience: *Laughing*
Twilight: Man, it ain't funny! Da f*q does everypony have to laugh at me for?
Pinkie Pie: Come on Twilight, I think wewe sound great with your new voice.
Audience: *Laughing*
Applejack: Let's start with the fanmail, shall we?
Heartsong, and Annie start bringing them notes.
Fluttershy: *Takes letter* Here's one for me. Dear Fluttershy, when are wewe going to stop being a coward?
upinde wa mvua Dash: When computers start growing arms, and legs.
Audience: *Laughing*
Fluttershy: *Very sad* I like myself just the way I am.
Rarity: I don't think you're a coward.
Twilight: Man, I just hope none of the letters I get are bad.
Rarity: Well I know none of my letters will be bad. *Opens envelope* Here's a letter from Hank, age 19. *Nervous* Dear Rarity, why are wewe a really big sex addict? Every picture I have seen of wewe is porn.
Audience: *Laughing*
Rarity: *Hiding under table*
Applejack: Man, this ain't shabiki mail. It's hate mail.
Audience: *Laughing*
upinde wa mvua Dash: What letter did wewe get?
Applejack: Let me check. *Reading letter* Dear Applejack, are all rednecks as stupid as you?
Audience: *Laughing*
upinde wa mvua Dash: *Laughing*
Applejack: Well wewe wouldn't be laughing if wewe got a disrespectful letter like that.
upinde wa mvua Dash: No one would dare to send me a hate letter. I'm upinde wa mvua Dash!
A light was shining on her, and angels started playing lyres.
Audience: *Laughing*
upinde wa mvua Dash: *Gets letter* Dear upinde wa mvua Dash, wewe are very arrogant. *Angry* Okay, if being loyal is arrogant, than saying good morning is a death threat.
Audience: *Laughing*
Pinkie Pie: Oooh, ooh. I want a letter!
Annie: *Gives Pinkie Pie a letter*
Applejack: I'd be surprised if someone wrote something nice to her.
Pinkie Pie: *Reading letter* Dear Pinkie Pie, do wewe take drugs during any of your parties? No, because drugs are bad, and they're for stupid ponies like Applejack.
Audience: *Laughing, clapping, and cheering*
Applejack: *Sarcastic* Thanks Pinkie Pie. I upendo wewe too.
Twilight: Man, I didn't get any letters!
Heartsong: *Gives Twilight a letter*
Twilight: *Reading letter* This letter is from the kofia of Compton, L.A. Dear Twilight Sparkle, how does it feel to be one of us now?
Audience: *Laughing*
Twilight: Man, I ain't one of you. I ain't no N word. Am I allowed to say the actual word?
Audience: *Laughing*
Annie: wewe know what? I think this has been going bad enough for everypony.
Heartsong: Really? The audience seems to like it.
Audience: *Laughing*
Heartsong: And I like how this is going too.
Audience: *Laughing*
Annie: Well too bad. That's all the time we got for fanmail. Coming up next, it's Celebrity Jeopardy.
Audience: *Clapping*
The cast for this episode of Celebrity Jeopardy is
Saten Twist - Alex Trebek (He wears a white wig, and his cutie mark has been changed to a game onyesha wheel.)
Sean the hedgehog as himself (He's a famous war hero.)
Cosmic upinde wa mvua as Scott Eastwood (The son of Clint Eastwood)
and Blaze as Tom Hanks
Audience: *Clapping*
Alex: Welcome back to Celebrity Jeopardy. Since the current mwezi is October, most of our categories will be related to Halloween. With that said, let's take a look at the board. Tom Hanks is in third place with negative 84,000 dollars.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: I've been in onyesha business for a long time Alex, and frankly, I don't like the wages you're paying me.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Too bad. Sean the hedgehog is in first place with negative 8,000 dollars.
Audience: *Clapping*
Sean: Why do wewe keep giving everypony negative amounts of money Trebek? Did wewe get robbed kwa a three mwaka old?
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: *Ignores Sean* Moving on. Scott Eastwood is in sekunde place with negative sixteen thousand dollars.
Audience: *Clapping*
Scott: Hi dad. If you're watching this, I'm going to let everypony know about how awesome wewe are, and how successful wewe are in acting.
Audience: *Laughing*
Scott: I'm going to be just like him.
Alex: Fantastic. Now it's time for Double Jeopardy. The categories are..
Potent Potables
The Vowels, and numbers before ten
Holidays that end in alloween
Decorations
What's that smell
Frankenstein
And finally, pumpkins
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Starting off will be Tom Hanks since he's in last place.
Tom: I'm losing? I gotta run faster!!
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: It's not a race.... Scott, why don't wewe pick a category?
Scott: Sure thing Mr. Trebek. I'll take sinema that my dad starred in for seven hundred.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: That's not a category.
Scott: Then, how about sinema that I starred in for seven hundred?
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: How about The vowels, and numbers before ten for 200? The answer is, "This number is between 7, and 9, and also comes before 10"
Audience: *Laughing*
Sean: *Rings in*
Alex: Mr. The Hedgehog?
Sean: A pair of breasts!
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: That wasn't neccesary.
Sean: Well that's what it looks like Trebek. wewe should know kwa staring at your brother's.
Audience: *Laughing*
Scott: *Rings in*
Alex: Mr. Eastwood?
Scott: My dad starred in this really great movie called The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly, and he killed a bunch of bad guys in the wildwest.
He ran out of time.
Alex: Time is up, fortunately. The answer was 8. That number is between 7, and 9 while being before 10.
Sean: Turn 8 sideways, and it looks like a pair of breasts.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Yes, I know. Scott, why don't wewe choose a category for us.
Scott: With pleasure. Let's try sinema that my dad starred in for a thousand.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: It seems like your dad is the only thing wewe think about.
Scott: Not really. Mostly, I think about the sinema he starred in.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: wewe know what? Let's just go with Decorations for 400. Now the answer is, "These decorations can be put on a tree."
Sean: *Rings in*
Alex: Yes Sean?
Sean: Your grand daughter's clothing.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: What?
Sean: Before I slept with her on krisimasi last year, she took all her clothing off, and put it on the tree.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Someone else, before I decide to end this?
Sean: End what? This is going great so far!
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: That's it. Final Jeopardy. The category for wewe three is your inayopendelewa color.
The final jeopardy muziki starts to play.
Alex: There are a lot of colors, so there's no way wewe should get this wrong.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Think of any color, and write it down. It could be red, yellow, green, au blue. au to make things easier for you, the colors of the rainbow.
Audience: *Laughing*
The timer rang.
Alex: Okay, let's see what wewe three wrote down. *Goes to Tom's board* Okay Tom, *Sees his podium is broken* The screen on your podium... What happened to it?
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Well I was uandishi down my inayopendelewa color, and all of a sudden it broke. wewe really need better equipment.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Moving on. *Goes to Scott's board* Mr. Eastwood wrote down. *Looks at his board* Where Eagles Dare? What's that supposed to mean?
Audience: *Laughing*
Scott: It was a movie my dad starred in in 1968.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Maybe your relationship with him is not a good one.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: And... *Goes to Sean's board* Our only contestant that's not a gppony, pony wrote down *Looks at his board* Blue. He wrote down his inayopendelewa color, now I just hope he doesn't say anything bad about me like last time.
Audience: *Laughing*
Sean: I was only speaking the truth.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Whatever. wewe wagered... Me. Blue me?
Audience: *Laughing*
Sean: *Laughing* No thank you, that's what a mare is for.
Alex: I don't get it.
Sean: Oh yes wewe do!
Alex: And that's all the time we have for Celebrity Jeopardy. Hopefully, for a long long time.
Audience: *Clapping*
In the inayofuata part of this episode, Sophie Shimmer stars as a gppony, pony that works in a body shop.
Bodyshop Ponies
Starring Sophie Shimmer as Wheel Bearing
Heartsong as Dainelle DeVito
Snow Wonder as Cutlass Supreme
Tom Foolery as Gary
Mortomis as Mr. Beddler
Pleiades as mizeituni, mzeituni
Master Sword as Tim
and Annie as Edwina
The bodyshop is a place where ponies repair cars. It's hard work, but everypony enjoys it. I can think of something else that's hard for others to enjoy.
Audience: *Laughing*
Mr. Beddler: Alright everypony, we're expecting two cars to come in today. One is an '03 Pearla, and the other is a much newer SUV.
Wheel Bearing: wewe don't know what type of SUV it is?
Mr. Beddler: No. I don't even know what SUV stands for.
Audience: *Laughing*
Gary: I'm sure nopony knows.
Audience: *Laughing*
Cutlass Supreme: Which ponies do wewe want on which car?
Mr. Beddler: I was just getting to that Cutlass. You, Danielle, and Wheel Bearing will work on the Chevy Pearla. The rest of wewe work on the SUV.
Tim: How are we supposed to work on something if wewe don't know what it is?
Audience: *Laughing*
Mr. Beddler: I know what it is, I just don't know what it stands for.
Tim: Aw, Mr. Beddler. You're being a bad influence to me.
Audience: *Laughing*
Mr. Beddler: Well get changed into your uniforms. Those cars will be here any minute.
And so, they did. The cars soon arrived, but the car doors to the karakana were closed.
Car Owner: *Honks horn*
Mr. Beddler: What was that?
Tim: I don't know, but I don't care. I just want those cars to onyesha up.
Audience: *Laughing*
Car Owner: *Honking horn*
Mr. Beddler: *Opens car door* Stop doing that. Someponies are waiting for two cars to arrive.
Audience: *Laughing*
Car Owner: This is one of them.
Mr. Beddler: Then bring her in.
Car Owner: This ain't a her. I named it Karl.
Mr. Beddler: wewe named a car Karl?
Audience: *Laughing*
Car Owner: That's what it is. wewe just gotta put an L at the end.
Audience: *Laughing*
The car owner brought his car in, and the SUV went in shortly after.
SUV Owner: How much would it cost to repaint this thing?
Mr. Beddler: What thing?
Audience: *Laughing*
SUV Owner: My car.
Mr. Beddler: Oh, this ain't a car. It's an SUV.
Audience: *Laughing*
SUV Owner: *Angry* All I want to know is how much it would cost to repaint my car.
Mr. Beddler: Repainting your SUV would cost about four hundred dollars.
SUV Owner: I could Lost that much money playing Jeopardy.
Audience: *Laughing*
Mr. Beddler: What color do wewe want your SUV?
SUV Owner: Same color.
Olive: Did somepony say they wanted to repaint their car?
SUV Owner: Yes?
Olive: *Throws machungwa, chungwa paint onto the SUV, and smiles* Problem solved.
Audience: *Laughing*
Olive: I would have gone for mizeituni, mzeituni Green, since my name is Olive.
Audience: *Laughing*
SUV Owner: Well I would have gone somewhere else if I knew this bodyshop was run kwa idiots! *Gets back in his car, and drives away*
Mr. Beddler: *Very angry* you're fired...
Olive: Oh well. wewe can't win them all.
Mr. Beddler: What's that supposed to mean?
Olive: I didn't win the chance of fixing that SUV. Well, at least I won't have to have somepony as a boss that doesn't know what an SUV is.
Audience: *Laughing*
Mr. Beddler: *He gets so angry that his face turns red*
Audience: *Laughing*
It's time for the Ponyville news. With your news anchors, Double Scoop as Nate Witherspoon, and Heartsong as Hillary Tosh.
Audience: *Clapping*
Nate: Thank wewe everypony. Thank you. Now quiet on the set!
Audience: *Laughing*
Hillary: Being a new news company, do expect some foul ups in tonight's broadcast.
Audience: *Laughing*
Nate: Let's begin with the country of Japan. They had a volkano erupt last week, which injured forty ponies, and killed seven others.
Hillary: It seems like Japan has been having a lot of bad things happening to them. The volcano, and that tsunami a few years ago, and then there was the bombing of Hiroshima, and Nagasaki.
Nate: Yeah, well they deserved it.
Audience: *Laughing*
Hillary: Let's songesha on to the weather.
Nate: Right. Our forecast for this week includes, a nice sunny siku for Wednesday, and Thursday. Then, we get a partly cloudy siku on Friday, followed kwa a nonstop thunderstorm on Saturday.
Hillary: It has to stop at sometime.
Nate: Maybe it will, when ponies stop getting scared over it.
Audience: *Laughing*
Nate: On Sunday, we will have another partly cloudy day, but on Monday, and Tuesday, the shit hits the shabiki when it begins to snow.
Audience: *Laughing*
Hillary: How did wewe figure that out?
Nate: Farmer's almanac. Never lies.
Audience: *Laughing*
Hillary: And finally, before we songesha onto commercials, we have a special visitor.
Nate: Coming all the way from the middle east, it's Major General Shayne Diesel.
Blaze is Shayne Diesel.
Audience: *Clapping, and cheering*
Shayne: Thanks for having me here. Any place is better than the Middle East.
Audience: *Laughing*
Nate: That's what we wanted to talk to wewe about.
Hillary: How are your soldiers doing over there?
Shayne: Not too bad, except for the fact that they're dealing with a new terrorist group called ISIS.
Audience: *Booing* F*ck ISIS!!
Shayne: Don't worry everypony, we will stop them! After all, we are the United States of Equestria!
Nate: *Starts to think that Shayne is being annoying, and becomes sarcastic* Really? I thought this was Japan.
Shayne: Nah, wewe don't wanna be there. They had a volkano erupt.
Audience: *Laughing*
Shayne: And I thought Hawaii had volkano problems!
Audience: *Laughing*
Hillary: Let's get back on the topic of ISIS.
Shayne: Ah yes, the disgrace to everypony that believes in freedom, and democracy. Freedom is what makes this world spin around!
A song starts to play in the background: link
Shayne: I'm talking about ponies that have a long unnecessary speech about Equestria, and how it's an awesome country while a foreign song plays in the background!
Audience: *Laughing*
Shayne: And while they're giving that long unnecessary speech about Equestria, and how it's an awesome country while a foreign song plays in the background, wewe see the Equestrian Flag, with stars, and stripes, waving in the wind, and reminding wewe that we are a powerful country!
Then the flag showed up behind Shayne in the background.
Audience: *Laughing*
Shayne: We are a reminder to ISIS, that we have the toughest army in the world, and we will kill them all!! *Sings along to the song* This is the U.S.E, and we will kill you!
Audience: *Laughing*
Shayne: wewe tried to attack us, but your attack failed! And now wewe shall pay us the price, for wewe attempting to attack our home!
Nate: *Confused*
Shayne: This is the U.S.E, and we will kill you!
Hillary: I think he finally Lost his mind.
Nate: Me too.
Audience: *Laughing*
Shayne: *Continues imba his song*
Nate, and Hillary snuck out of the studio. Shayne didn't notice, for he was too busy imba his song.
Audience: *Laughing*
And that's all the time we have for the news. Stop the song!!
Master Sword: Well, that's all the time we have for our onyesha today. Thank wewe for watching.
Tom: Master Sword, this is an article. How do wewe watch an article?
Audience: *Laughing*
Master Sword: I don't know, but the announcer always says, "On The Block was filmed in front of a live audience."
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: I see what wewe mean. Well, thank wewe for viewing this. How about that?
The End. STH/AM6663 Entertainment. Copyright 2014
Audience: *Cheering*
Master Sword & Tom: *Standing in front of a house*
Master Sword: hujambo everypony. Great to see wewe again.
Tom: Shut the f**k up.
Audience: *Laughing*
Master Sword: Tom, what was that for?
Tom: We need to forget about the jokes, and get things moving so the director won't get angry at us.
Master Sword: But we can't forget about jokes! This is a comedy show!
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: I never alisema we weren't going to do jokes.
Master Sword: Yes wewe did.
Tom: No I didn't.
Master Sword: Well I'm pretty sure wewe did.
Tom: Yeah, well that's your opinion.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Today's crossover parody, M*A*S*H Ponies On The Rails
Master Sword: And this is a crossover of.. Do we even have to say it? It's got both of the titles from the shows right there for you!
Audience: *Laughing*
For this crossover parody, the Season 3 Ponies On The Rails cast will be theirselves, but playing as the M*A*S*H ponies will be....
Tom Foolery as Captain Hawkeye Pierce
Saten Twist as Sargent Klinger
Double Scoop as Captain B.J Honnecut
Master Sword as Major Charles Emerson Winchester
Aina as Major Houllihan
and Mortomis as Colonel Potter
North Korea, 1953
One siku at the 4077th M*A*S*H unit, Captain Hawkeye was in the swamp with B.J.
Hawkeye: Oh, Beej. We've got too many wounded coming in here.
Honnecut: Beej. If wewe say that backwards, it's Jeeb.
Hawkeye: That's close enough to jeep.
Audience: *Laughing*
Winchester: *Walks in* What do wewe two think you're doing?
Hawkeye: Nothing.
Honnecut: I never knew the army would punish somepony for doing nothing.
Audience: *Laughing*
Winchester: Your humor fails to amuse me, but I will enjoy seeing wewe two get sent to the klink. One zaidi foul up, and you'll both be in the stockade for a long time.
Hawkeye: Klink? Stockade?
Honnecut: Make up your mind.
Audience: *Laughing*
Meanwhile, Colonel Potter was in his room talking on a telephone.
Colonel Potter: We need a new way to get patients from here back to their unit..... What's that?...... A Railway Line?..... Oh, it was just a joke..... Well, as soon as wewe find another way, let me know.... Adios.
Hawkeye: *Walks in Potter's room* Hello Colonel.
Colonel Potter: Don't any of wewe knock?
Hawkeye: What for? There's a war going on.
Audience: *Laughing*
Hawkeye: What's up?
Colonel Potter: Somepony just told me the dumbest joke. He thought it was funny to tell me that we'd make a Railway to take ponies from here to their unit. It just wastes too much time.
Hawkeye: *Getting an idea* Maybe it's not good as a joke, but it's good for another thing. *Leaves office*
Colonel Potter: What's that supposed to mean?
Meanwhile, in Cheyenne Wyoming, also in the mwaka 1953
Audience: *Laughing*
Pete: *Looking at telegram from Korea* I don't believe this!
Percy: *Walks into office* Sir? Everything okay?
Pete: No! We need to expand our line all the way to Korea!
Percy: wewe don't wanna go there. There's a war going on. *Leaves*
Audience: *Laughing*
Pete: Leave it to the army to screw things up.
Audience: *Laughing*
So the line was built all the way across the Pacific Ocean from San Franciscolt to Seoul. Then, it went all around the Equestrian Army's territory going to many M*A*S*H units, and army bases.
Major Houllihan: What is the meaning of all this?
Sargent Klinger: It's a Railway line.
A train was going across, but all of a sudden the bridge blew up.
Hawkeye: What happened?
Colonel Potter: That was one of ours!
Honnecut: What were they thinking?
Colonel Potter: They had no idea about this. Like I said, the army always screw things up.
Hawkeye: I have a feeling somepony alisema that before you.
Audience: *Laughing*
The End
On the inayofuata part of this episode, Tom Foolery, and Master Sword introduce us to zaidi ponies. Again.
They are...
Cosmic upinde wa mvua from Emo_Brony47
Heartsong from Scougesgirl
Annie from Ameliarose2002
Blaze from Liam_A_Ninja
Sophie Shimmer from Aquagirl445
Snow Wonder from Dragonaura15
Theme Song: link
Master Sword: Come on Tom, let's go meet the others.
Tom: Right behind you.
Double Scoop: *Standing on mitaani, mtaa corner*
Aina: *Runs out of her house*
Sunny: Hey, wait for me. *Flying in the middle of the street*
Saten Twist: *Polishing his chain saw, but stops to go meet the others*
Pleiades: *Arrives at corner*
Mortomis: *Standing inayofuata to Double Scoop*
Tom: zaidi ponies!!
Snow Wonder: *Arrives in a brand new Corvette*
Cosmic Rainbow: *Flies from the clouds*
Heartsong: *Climbs out of a manhole*
Annie: *Arrives on a bicycle*
Blaze: *Flies out of a house window, and lands inayofuata to Tom*
Sophie Shimmer: *Gets off of a slow moving bus*
All: We live together on the block!
Audience: *Clapping*
Announcer: Okay, stop the song! We need to keep this thing rolling.
Audience: *Laughing*
Episode 2: zaidi Introductions
Announcer: On The Block was filmed in front of a live audience.
Audience: *Laughing*
Announcer: Need I say more?
Audience: *Laughing*
Double Scoop: *Making a Jack-O lantern with an ice cream cone*
Snow Wonder: *Looking at Jack-O lantern* That looks really beautiful.
Double Scoop: Thanks. Have wewe ever wondered what the O stands for in Jack-O lantern?
Snow Wonder: No. What?
Double Scoop: Off.
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*
Snow Wonder: Okay. *Walks away*
Meanwhile at Blaze's house, he was playing Call Of Duty: Advanced Warfare with Cosmic Rainbow.
Cosmic Rainbow: This game wasn't supposed to come out until November. How did wewe get it?
Blaze: With a little persuasion.
Cosmic Rainbow: What kind of persuasion?
Blaze: The kind that risks lives.
Audience: *Laughing*
Cosmic Rainbow: *Gets shot* Wait, what the hell? I shot that guy seven times in the head, and he never died.
Blaze: That's ridiculous. wewe must have missed.
Cosmic Rainbow: How does one miss the head of a gppony, pony when shooting a gun?
Audience: *Laughing*
Blaze: I'm not even gonna bother arguing with wewe *His character falls through the ground* Wait, what the--
Cosmic Rainbow: Be prepared for the ultimate rage.
Blaze: FFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUU
He was shouting so loud that it was heard everywhere. It was heard in Manehattan, on the train to Canterlot, and it was even heard in China.
Chinese Pony: Sounds rike somepony is angry.
Chinese gppony, pony 2: Jawohr.
Chinese Pony: Stop trying to speak German.
Audience: *Laughing*
Back at Blaze's house...
Blaze: *Takes game out of PS4, and puts it back in case* This is stupid.
Cosmic Rainbow: What are wewe going to do?
Blaze: I am going to-
The doorbell rang.
Blaze: Hmm. *Brings game to the front door, and opens the door*
Colt: *Dressed up as a tree* Trick au treat.
Blaze: Here, have a videogame. *Gives game to Colt*
Colt: Awesome! *Runs away with game*
Audience: *Laughing*
Cosmic Rainbow: wewe gave a six mwaka old a rated M game?
Blaze: Have wewe ever tried giving a yo yo to a gppony, pony at the age of 67?
Audience: *Laughing*
Meanwhile at a retirement center.
Old Pony: *Tied up in yo yo* Oh fiddlesticks. I'll have to call Jimmy again. This is the 24th time I got stuck in this contraption.
Audience: *Laughing*
And now, it's time for fanmail from your inayopendelewa six ponies, the mane 6!
Audience: *Cheering, whistling, and clapping*
Announcer: Just one thing we need to tell you. Twilight Sparkle did something bad, and Celestia has punished her, kwa giving her the voice of Ice Cube.
Audience: *Laughing*
Twilight: Man, it ain't funny! Da f*q does everypony have to laugh at me for?
Pinkie Pie: Come on Twilight, I think wewe sound great with your new voice.
Audience: *Laughing*
Applejack: Let's start with the fanmail, shall we?
Heartsong, and Annie start bringing them notes.
Fluttershy: *Takes letter* Here's one for me. Dear Fluttershy, when are wewe going to stop being a coward?
upinde wa mvua Dash: When computers start growing arms, and legs.
Audience: *Laughing*
Fluttershy: *Very sad* I like myself just the way I am.
Rarity: I don't think you're a coward.
Twilight: Man, I just hope none of the letters I get are bad.
Rarity: Well I know none of my letters will be bad. *Opens envelope* Here's a letter from Hank, age 19. *Nervous* Dear Rarity, why are wewe a really big sex addict? Every picture I have seen of wewe is porn.
Audience: *Laughing*
Rarity: *Hiding under table*
Applejack: Man, this ain't shabiki mail. It's hate mail.
Audience: *Laughing*
upinde wa mvua Dash: What letter did wewe get?
Applejack: Let me check. *Reading letter* Dear Applejack, are all rednecks as stupid as you?
Audience: *Laughing*
upinde wa mvua Dash: *Laughing*
Applejack: Well wewe wouldn't be laughing if wewe got a disrespectful letter like that.
upinde wa mvua Dash: No one would dare to send me a hate letter. I'm upinde wa mvua Dash!
A light was shining on her, and angels started playing lyres.
Audience: *Laughing*
upinde wa mvua Dash: *Gets letter* Dear upinde wa mvua Dash, wewe are very arrogant. *Angry* Okay, if being loyal is arrogant, than saying good morning is a death threat.
Audience: *Laughing*
Pinkie Pie: Oooh, ooh. I want a letter!
Annie: *Gives Pinkie Pie a letter*
Applejack: I'd be surprised if someone wrote something nice to her.
Pinkie Pie: *Reading letter* Dear Pinkie Pie, do wewe take drugs during any of your parties? No, because drugs are bad, and they're for stupid ponies like Applejack.
Audience: *Laughing, clapping, and cheering*
Applejack: *Sarcastic* Thanks Pinkie Pie. I upendo wewe too.
Twilight: Man, I didn't get any letters!
Heartsong: *Gives Twilight a letter*
Twilight: *Reading letter* This letter is from the kofia of Compton, L.A. Dear Twilight Sparkle, how does it feel to be one of us now?
Audience: *Laughing*
Twilight: Man, I ain't one of you. I ain't no N word. Am I allowed to say the actual word?
Audience: *Laughing*
Annie: wewe know what? I think this has been going bad enough for everypony.
Heartsong: Really? The audience seems to like it.
Audience: *Laughing*
Heartsong: And I like how this is going too.
Audience: *Laughing*
Annie: Well too bad. That's all the time we got for fanmail. Coming up next, it's Celebrity Jeopardy.
Audience: *Clapping*
The cast for this episode of Celebrity Jeopardy is
Saten Twist - Alex Trebek (He wears a white wig, and his cutie mark has been changed to a game onyesha wheel.)
Sean the hedgehog as himself (He's a famous war hero.)
Cosmic upinde wa mvua as Scott Eastwood (The son of Clint Eastwood)
and Blaze as Tom Hanks
Audience: *Clapping*
Alex: Welcome back to Celebrity Jeopardy. Since the current mwezi is October, most of our categories will be related to Halloween. With that said, let's take a look at the board. Tom Hanks is in third place with negative 84,000 dollars.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: I've been in onyesha business for a long time Alex, and frankly, I don't like the wages you're paying me.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Too bad. Sean the hedgehog is in first place with negative 8,000 dollars.
Audience: *Clapping*
Sean: Why do wewe keep giving everypony negative amounts of money Trebek? Did wewe get robbed kwa a three mwaka old?
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: *Ignores Sean* Moving on. Scott Eastwood is in sekunde place with negative sixteen thousand dollars.
Audience: *Clapping*
Scott: Hi dad. If you're watching this, I'm going to let everypony know about how awesome wewe are, and how successful wewe are in acting.
Audience: *Laughing*
Scott: I'm going to be just like him.
Alex: Fantastic. Now it's time for Double Jeopardy. The categories are..
Potent Potables
The Vowels, and numbers before ten
Holidays that end in alloween
Decorations
What's that smell
Frankenstein
And finally, pumpkins
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Starting off will be Tom Hanks since he's in last place.
Tom: I'm losing? I gotta run faster!!
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: It's not a race.... Scott, why don't wewe pick a category?
Scott: Sure thing Mr. Trebek. I'll take sinema that my dad starred in for seven hundred.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: That's not a category.
Scott: Then, how about sinema that I starred in for seven hundred?
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: How about The vowels, and numbers before ten for 200? The answer is, "This number is between 7, and 9, and also comes before 10"
Audience: *Laughing*
Sean: *Rings in*
Alex: Mr. The Hedgehog?
Sean: A pair of breasts!
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: That wasn't neccesary.
Sean: Well that's what it looks like Trebek. wewe should know kwa staring at your brother's.
Audience: *Laughing*
Scott: *Rings in*
Alex: Mr. Eastwood?
Scott: My dad starred in this really great movie called The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly, and he killed a bunch of bad guys in the wildwest.
He ran out of time.
Alex: Time is up, fortunately. The answer was 8. That number is between 7, and 9 while being before 10.
Sean: Turn 8 sideways, and it looks like a pair of breasts.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Yes, I know. Scott, why don't wewe choose a category for us.
Scott: With pleasure. Let's try sinema that my dad starred in for a thousand.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: It seems like your dad is the only thing wewe think about.
Scott: Not really. Mostly, I think about the sinema he starred in.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: wewe know what? Let's just go with Decorations for 400. Now the answer is, "These decorations can be put on a tree."
Sean: *Rings in*
Alex: Yes Sean?
Sean: Your grand daughter's clothing.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: What?
Sean: Before I slept with her on krisimasi last year, she took all her clothing off, and put it on the tree.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Someone else, before I decide to end this?
Sean: End what? This is going great so far!
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: That's it. Final Jeopardy. The category for wewe three is your inayopendelewa color.
The final jeopardy muziki starts to play.
Alex: There are a lot of colors, so there's no way wewe should get this wrong.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Think of any color, and write it down. It could be red, yellow, green, au blue. au to make things easier for you, the colors of the rainbow.
Audience: *Laughing*
The timer rang.
Alex: Okay, let's see what wewe three wrote down. *Goes to Tom's board* Okay Tom, *Sees his podium is broken* The screen on your podium... What happened to it?
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Well I was uandishi down my inayopendelewa color, and all of a sudden it broke. wewe really need better equipment.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Moving on. *Goes to Scott's board* Mr. Eastwood wrote down. *Looks at his board* Where Eagles Dare? What's that supposed to mean?
Audience: *Laughing*
Scott: It was a movie my dad starred in in 1968.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Maybe your relationship with him is not a good one.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: And... *Goes to Sean's board* Our only contestant that's not a gppony, pony wrote down *Looks at his board* Blue. He wrote down his inayopendelewa color, now I just hope he doesn't say anything bad about me like last time.
Audience: *Laughing*
Sean: I was only speaking the truth.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Whatever. wewe wagered... Me. Blue me?
Audience: *Laughing*
Sean: *Laughing* No thank you, that's what a mare is for.
Alex: I don't get it.
Sean: Oh yes wewe do!
Alex: And that's all the time we have for Celebrity Jeopardy. Hopefully, for a long long time.
Audience: *Clapping*
In the inayofuata part of this episode, Sophie Shimmer stars as a gppony, pony that works in a body shop.
Bodyshop Ponies
Starring Sophie Shimmer as Wheel Bearing
Heartsong as Dainelle DeVito
Snow Wonder as Cutlass Supreme
Tom Foolery as Gary
Mortomis as Mr. Beddler
Pleiades as mizeituni, mzeituni
Master Sword as Tim
and Annie as Edwina
The bodyshop is a place where ponies repair cars. It's hard work, but everypony enjoys it. I can think of something else that's hard for others to enjoy.
Audience: *Laughing*
Mr. Beddler: Alright everypony, we're expecting two cars to come in today. One is an '03 Pearla, and the other is a much newer SUV.
Wheel Bearing: wewe don't know what type of SUV it is?
Mr. Beddler: No. I don't even know what SUV stands for.
Audience: *Laughing*
Gary: I'm sure nopony knows.
Audience: *Laughing*
Cutlass Supreme: Which ponies do wewe want on which car?
Mr. Beddler: I was just getting to that Cutlass. You, Danielle, and Wheel Bearing will work on the Chevy Pearla. The rest of wewe work on the SUV.
Tim: How are we supposed to work on something if wewe don't know what it is?
Audience: *Laughing*
Mr. Beddler: I know what it is, I just don't know what it stands for.
Tim: Aw, Mr. Beddler. You're being a bad influence to me.
Audience: *Laughing*
Mr. Beddler: Well get changed into your uniforms. Those cars will be here any minute.
And so, they did. The cars soon arrived, but the car doors to the karakana were closed.
Car Owner: *Honks horn*
Mr. Beddler: What was that?
Tim: I don't know, but I don't care. I just want those cars to onyesha up.
Audience: *Laughing*
Car Owner: *Honking horn*
Mr. Beddler: *Opens car door* Stop doing that. Someponies are waiting for two cars to arrive.
Audience: *Laughing*
Car Owner: This is one of them.
Mr. Beddler: Then bring her in.
Car Owner: This ain't a her. I named it Karl.
Mr. Beddler: wewe named a car Karl?
Audience: *Laughing*
Car Owner: That's what it is. wewe just gotta put an L at the end.
Audience: *Laughing*
The car owner brought his car in, and the SUV went in shortly after.
SUV Owner: How much would it cost to repaint this thing?
Mr. Beddler: What thing?
Audience: *Laughing*
SUV Owner: My car.
Mr. Beddler: Oh, this ain't a car. It's an SUV.
Audience: *Laughing*
SUV Owner: *Angry* All I want to know is how much it would cost to repaint my car.
Mr. Beddler: Repainting your SUV would cost about four hundred dollars.
SUV Owner: I could Lost that much money playing Jeopardy.
Audience: *Laughing*
Mr. Beddler: What color do wewe want your SUV?
SUV Owner: Same color.
Olive: Did somepony say they wanted to repaint their car?
SUV Owner: Yes?
Olive: *Throws machungwa, chungwa paint onto the SUV, and smiles* Problem solved.
Audience: *Laughing*
Olive: I would have gone for mizeituni, mzeituni Green, since my name is Olive.
Audience: *Laughing*
SUV Owner: Well I would have gone somewhere else if I knew this bodyshop was run kwa idiots! *Gets back in his car, and drives away*
Mr. Beddler: *Very angry* you're fired...
Olive: Oh well. wewe can't win them all.
Mr. Beddler: What's that supposed to mean?
Olive: I didn't win the chance of fixing that SUV. Well, at least I won't have to have somepony as a boss that doesn't know what an SUV is.
Audience: *Laughing*
Mr. Beddler: *He gets so angry that his face turns red*
Audience: *Laughing*
It's time for the Ponyville news. With your news anchors, Double Scoop as Nate Witherspoon, and Heartsong as Hillary Tosh.
Audience: *Clapping*
Nate: Thank wewe everypony. Thank you. Now quiet on the set!
Audience: *Laughing*
Hillary: Being a new news company, do expect some foul ups in tonight's broadcast.
Audience: *Laughing*
Nate: Let's begin with the country of Japan. They had a volkano erupt last week, which injured forty ponies, and killed seven others.
Hillary: It seems like Japan has been having a lot of bad things happening to them. The volcano, and that tsunami a few years ago, and then there was the bombing of Hiroshima, and Nagasaki.
Nate: Yeah, well they deserved it.
Audience: *Laughing*
Hillary: Let's songesha on to the weather.
Nate: Right. Our forecast for this week includes, a nice sunny siku for Wednesday, and Thursday. Then, we get a partly cloudy siku on Friday, followed kwa a nonstop thunderstorm on Saturday.
Hillary: It has to stop at sometime.
Nate: Maybe it will, when ponies stop getting scared over it.
Audience: *Laughing*
Nate: On Sunday, we will have another partly cloudy day, but on Monday, and Tuesday, the shit hits the shabiki when it begins to snow.
Audience: *Laughing*
Hillary: How did wewe figure that out?
Nate: Farmer's almanac. Never lies.
Audience: *Laughing*
Hillary: And finally, before we songesha onto commercials, we have a special visitor.
Nate: Coming all the way from the middle east, it's Major General Shayne Diesel.
Blaze is Shayne Diesel.
Audience: *Clapping, and cheering*
Shayne: Thanks for having me here. Any place is better than the Middle East.
Audience: *Laughing*
Nate: That's what we wanted to talk to wewe about.
Hillary: How are your soldiers doing over there?
Shayne: Not too bad, except for the fact that they're dealing with a new terrorist group called ISIS.
Audience: *Booing* F*ck ISIS!!
Shayne: Don't worry everypony, we will stop them! After all, we are the United States of Equestria!
Nate: *Starts to think that Shayne is being annoying, and becomes sarcastic* Really? I thought this was Japan.
Shayne: Nah, wewe don't wanna be there. They had a volkano erupt.
Audience: *Laughing*
Shayne: And I thought Hawaii had volkano problems!
Audience: *Laughing*
Hillary: Let's get back on the topic of ISIS.
Shayne: Ah yes, the disgrace to everypony that believes in freedom, and democracy. Freedom is what makes this world spin around!
A song starts to play in the background: link
Shayne: I'm talking about ponies that have a long unnecessary speech about Equestria, and how it's an awesome country while a foreign song plays in the background!
Audience: *Laughing*
Shayne: And while they're giving that long unnecessary speech about Equestria, and how it's an awesome country while a foreign song plays in the background, wewe see the Equestrian Flag, with stars, and stripes, waving in the wind, and reminding wewe that we are a powerful country!
Then the flag showed up behind Shayne in the background.
Audience: *Laughing*
Shayne: We are a reminder to ISIS, that we have the toughest army in the world, and we will kill them all!! *Sings along to the song* This is the U.S.E, and we will kill you!
Audience: *Laughing*
Shayne: wewe tried to attack us, but your attack failed! And now wewe shall pay us the price, for wewe attempting to attack our home!
Nate: *Confused*
Shayne: This is the U.S.E, and we will kill you!
Hillary: I think he finally Lost his mind.
Nate: Me too.
Audience: *Laughing*
Shayne: *Continues imba his song*
Nate, and Hillary snuck out of the studio. Shayne didn't notice, for he was too busy imba his song.
Audience: *Laughing*
And that's all the time we have for the news. Stop the song!!
Master Sword: Well, that's all the time we have for our onyesha today. Thank wewe for watching.
Tom: Master Sword, this is an article. How do wewe watch an article?
Audience: *Laughing*
Master Sword: I don't know, but the announcer always says, "On The Block was filmed in front of a live audience."
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: I see what wewe mean. Well, thank wewe for viewing this. How about that?
The End. STH/AM6663 Entertainment. Copyright 2014
Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see.
Larry Potsmoker be a seriez of seven ndoto novels written kwa tha British lyricist J. K. Rowling. Da vitabu chronicle tha adventurez of a wizard, Larry Potsmoker, n' his wild lil' playaz Ronald Weasley n' Hermione Granger, all of whom is studentz at Hogwartz School of Witchcraft n' Wizardry. Da main story arc concerns Harryz quest ta overcome tha Dark wizard Lord Voldemort, whose aims is ta become immortal, conquer tha wizardin ghetto, subjugate non-magical gangstas, n' destroy all em whoz punda stand up in his way, especially Larry Potsmoker.
