Welcome to the block. And now for your hosts, Master Sword, and Tom Foolery.

Audience: *Cheering, clapping, and whistling*
Master Sword & Tom Foolery: *Standing in front of a house*
Tom: How is everypony doing today?
Audience: Good.
Master Sword: That word is used too often. Not only does it describe the way you're feeling, but it also describes... Ah, forget it.
Tom: Save the screw ups for the bloopers, okay?
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: We have a special guest on our onyesha today, and his name is Nocturnal Mirage.
Audience: *Cheering*
Mirage: *Arrives*
Master Sword: Hey, good to see wewe again.
Mirage: Thanks mate. May I?
Tom: Go ahead.
Mirage: Today's crossover parody, Jack Reacher And The Beanstalk.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Tom Cruise climbs up a beanstalk, and kills people.
Audience: *Laughing*

Jack Reacher And The Beanstalk

Starring Nocturnal Mirage as Jack Reacher
Master Sword as the giant
Snow Wonder as Helen Rodin
Cosmic upinde wa mvua as Alex Rodin

Helen: We got zaidi reports of the giant attacking our town.
Jack: Are wewe sure it's not Godzilla?
Audience: *Light laughter*
Helen: I alisema giant. Not monster.
Jack: Monsters are giants. Ask anyone. *Points at Alex* hujambo Alex, is a monster a giant?
Alex: Yes.
Helen: No it's not.
Jack: Yeah it is. zaidi ponies are saying it is, so you're wrong.
Helen: If zaidi ponies alisema World War 2 never existed, would wewe believe them?
Audience: *Laughing*
Jack: I think wewe should shut up, and I'm gonna go stop the monster. *Walks away*

Later, Jack got outside, and looked up in the sky.

Jack: If I'm going to stop that monster, I need to get to him. How am I going to do that?

A big seed fell from the sky.

Jack: *Moves out of the way* Predictable. I mean, we are parodying Jack & The Beanstalk.
Audience: *Laughing*

A big beanstalk started growing.

Jack: And now is my cue to climb onto this thing. *Jumps onto a leaf, and begins climbing to the top* I should get there sometime soon.

7 hours later

Audience: *Laughing*
Jack: *Gets to the juu of the beanstalk* Okay giant. *Grabs a sniper rifle, and looks around the clouds* Where are you? *Sees a big castle* In there. *Runs to the castle*

9.5 hours later.

Audience: *Laughing*
Jack: Ugh. *Leaning on the door* Why am I so tiny compared to everything else in this world?
Audience: *Laughing*
Jack: *Goes into the castle*
Giant: *Sleeping in front of a TV set*
Jack: Hey, giants aren't supposed to have television!
Audience: *Laughing*
Giant: *Wakes up*
Jack: Maybe I shouldn't have alisema that outloud.
Giant: Fee fi fo fum. I smell.. *Sniffs his hoof* Actually, I don't know what I smell.
Audience: *Laughing*
Jack: *Shoots the giant*
Giant: You're crazy. Miniature bullets won't kill me.
Jack: Then what will?
Giant: Not telling.
Jack: *Runs back to the beanstalk* This is probably going to take another 9, and a half hours!
Audience: *Laughing*
Giant: *Chasing Jack*
Jack: *Losing his balance* Whoa. *Falls through a cloud*
Giant: *Jumps, and chases Jack*
Jack: *Grabs hold of the beanstalk*
Giant: *Grabs the beanstalk, and is below Jack* Wait a minute. Aren't I supposed to be above you?
Jack: Does it matter?
Giant: No.
Jack: Then shut up.
Audience: *Laughing*
Giant: *Loses his footing, and falls*
Jack: Finally. Glad that's over. Can we end this now?

The End

On the inayofuata part of this episode

Nocturnal Mirage plays Gran Turismo 6.

Theme Song: link

Master Sword: Come on Tom, let's go meet the others.
Tom: Right behind you.
Double Scoop: *Standing on mitaani, mtaa corner*
Aina: *Runs out of her house*
Sunny: Hey, wait for me. *Flying in the middle of the street*
Saten Twist: *Polishing his chain saw, but stops to go meet the others*
Pleiades: *Arrives at corner*
Mortomis: *Standing inayofuata to Double Scoop*
Tom: zaidi ponies!!
Snow Wonder: *Arrives in a brand new Corvette*
Cosmic Rainbow: *Flies from the clouds*
Heartsong: *Climbs out of a manhole*
Annie: *Arrives on a bicycle*
Blaze: *Flies out of a house window, and lands inayofuata to Tom*
Sophie Shimmer: *Gets off of a slow moving bus*
Astrel Sky: *Appears out of nowhere with magic*
Sean: *Lands behind Astrel Sky with a parachute*
All: We live together on the block!
Audience: *Clapping*
Announcer: Okay, stop the song! We need to keep this thing rolling.
Audience: *Laughing*

Episode 18: None Of Your Business

Nocturnal Mirage was at Sean's house with Tom, Master Sword, Mortomis, Annie, and Heartsong.

Mirage: How many Playstations do wewe have?
Sean: Sixteen. That way, when we all play Gran Turismo 6, we can race each other.
Master Sword: No we can't. mgawanyiko, baidisha screen mode is for two players only.
Mirage: Are wewe always an idiot, au are wewe just having a bad day?
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: What he's talking about, is that we can all play online, using these Playstations.
Master Sword: Oh, I get it. Sixteen Playstations, so that we can all play online in the same room. Smart idea.
Sean: I came up with it, so of course it's a smart idea.
Audience: *Laughing*
Mirage: Okay, that wasn't even funny.
Tom: Hey! Don't insult my show!!!!
Audience: *Laughing*
Sean: Fellas, are we gonna play, au what?
Mortomis: I'm tired of hearing wewe argue all the time. Let's race for crying out loud.
Sean: He's right, we need to race. *Selects his car* I will choose the 1969 Corvette Stingray.
Annie: Regular, au convertible.
Sean: Regular, it's faster.
Mirage: I'm going to take a Nascar Ford Fusion.
Sean: You, and your Fords. That's all wewe choose in this game.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: I'm getting the Maserati.
Heartsong: Which one?
Tom: The only one in the game.
Audience: *Laughing*
Master Sword: I'm getting a Toyota Supra race car.
Annie: You, and Nocturnal are the only ones that have race cars so far.
Mortomis: I'm gonna choose the Cadillac CTS.
Annie: My car will be the Corvette as well, but a 2009 ZR1.
Heartsong: And I'm using the BMW M4 Safety car.
Tom: What track are we going to use?
Sean: I think we'll race on Special Stage X.
Master Sword: Don't do that. The track is an oval, and it would be perfect for Mirage.
Mirage: Yes, I do have a Nascar after all.
Audience: *Laughing*
Sean: It wouldn't be perfect for Mirage, because instead of turning left, you'll have to turn right.
Audience: *Laughing*
Mirage: WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!!?
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Special guest stars are not allowed to shout.
Audience: *Laughing*
Sean: Two laps sound okay?
Ponies: Yeah.
Tom: *Looks at the reader* Find out who wins this race in part 5 of this episode. We're gonna start off our skits now, and the first one will be Celebrity Jeopardy, so don't go away.
Audience: *Clapping*

Our cast for this Celebrity Jeopardy skit is

Saten Twist - Alex Trebek (He wears a white wig, a fake white mustache, and his cutie mark has been changed to a game onyesha wheel.)
Sean the hedgehog as himself (He's a famous war hero.)
Double Diamond as French Stewart
and special guest star, Nocturnal Mirage as Tom Selleck

Audience: *Clapping*
Alex: Welcome back to Celebrity Jeopardy. Before we begin the double jeopardy round, I'd like to remind our contestants once again, to please refrain from using ethnic slurs.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: That said, let's take a look at the scores. Sean the hedgehog has set a new jeopardy record with negative $230,000.
Audience: *Laughing*
Sean: wewe think you're pretty smart, don't wewe Trebek? With your dago mustache, and your greasy mane!
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Look! What did I just say about using ethnic slurs?
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: From 3rd Rock From The Sun, French Stewart, in sekunde place with negative $17,000.
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*
French: *Has his eyes closed. He does this everytime he talks* I'm a late bloomer Alex, and in double jeopardy, I'm gonna bloom.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: *Annoyed* Sure wewe will. And finally, in his sekunde appearance, Tom Selleck in a commanding lead with 14 dollars.
Tom: Hey. *Points to his podium* Hey, check out the podium. Look at this.
Alex: Mr. Selleck has apparently changed his name to Turd Ferguson.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Yeah that's right. Turd Ferguson, it's a funny name.
Alex: *Very annoyed*
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: great. Let's take a look at the final board. And the categories are

Potent Potables
Sharp Things
sinema That Start With The Word Jaws
A Petit Dejane

Alex: That category is about french phrases, so we'll just skip that one.
Tom: hujambo uh, I speak a little french. You're an asswipe, pardon my french.
Audience: *Laughing*
French: *Sad* My name's French.
Tom: Yeah, well who gives a damn?
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Moving on.

Animal Sounds
Condiments
And finally, your ass, au hole in the ground.

Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Mr. Selleck, unfortunately, you're in the lead, so we'll start with you.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Yeah I'll take the uh condom thing for 8,000.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: That's condiments!
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: For 400. This condiment is made from mustard seeds.
French: *Rings in*
Alex: French Stewart?
French: The answer of course is onions. I'll take condiments for 800, thank wewe very much.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: That's not the right answer.
Tom: *Rings in*
Alex: Tom Selleck.
Tom: Eh, that's not my name.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Okay, Turd Ferguson.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Yeah, what do wewe want?
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: wewe buzzed in.
Tom: No I didn't.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Yes wewe did.
Tom: Yeah, well that's your opinion.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: I hate my job.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: The answer was mustard. Mustard is made from mustard seeds.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Mr. Selleck it's still your board.
Tom: Yeah well ehh. Why don't wewe give me ape tit for 200?
Alex: *Angry* It's not ape tit.
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*
Alex: It's a petit never mind.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Let's just songesha on to Animal Sounds for 600. This is the sound a doggy makes.
Sean: *Rings in*
Alex: Mr. The Hedgehog?
Sean: Moo.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: No.
Sean: Well that's the sound your grand daughter made last night.
Audience: Ah!! *Laughing*
Sean: *Laughing*
Alex: Okay that's not necessary.
Sean: Ah.
Tom: *Rings in*
Alex: Tom Selleck?
Tom: Who is uh... Scooby Doo?
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: No.
Tom: Yeah he was a funny dog Scooby Doo. He drove around in a van, and solved mysteries.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: That is incorrect.
Tom: Nah that's correct.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: I remember. He had a pal, Scrappy Doo.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: No.
French: *Rings in*
Alex: French Stewart, the sound a dog makes.
French: Uh.... Who is John Cafferty And The beaver, biva Brown Band? Thank wewe very much, I'll take animal sounds for 800.
Alex: NO! Good lord! We would've accepted bow wow, au ruff.
Sean: Ah, rough. Just the way your grand daughter likes it Trebek.
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*
Alex: Come on, that is way out of line.
Tom: *Runs backstage*
Alex: Mr. Selleck, what are wewe doing?!!?
Tom: *Walks towards Alex, and is wearing a massive ten gallon hat*
Sean: *Laughing at Tom*
Tom: Yeah I found this backstage. Oversized hat, it's funny.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: No it's not.
Tom: Sure it is. It's funny. It's funny, because it's bigger then a normal hat.
Alex: I see that, get back to your podium.
Tom: Haha. *Takes off the hat* Take a look at that.
Alex: Yeah I see that. Get back to your podium, it's not funny.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: *Returns to his podium*
Alex: What's going on? Okay, let's just songesha on to Final Jeopardy. The category is, wewe know what? I'll tell wewe what, just write a number. Any number. Any number, and wewe win.
Audience: *Laughing*

Final Jeopardy muziki started playing.

Alex: We'll accept any number. Any number at all. A 1, au a 2, au a 3. au how about a 4? It's that simple. I know wewe can do this.

The kengele rang, and the contestants ran out of time.

Alex: Let's start with French Stewart who is grinning like an idiot.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: wewe look pretty sure of yourself. wewe think wewe got the right answer?
French: Yes, I'm pretty sure of it Alex.
Alex: Well, all wewe had to do was write a number, and wewe wrote, threeve.
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*
Alex: A combination of three, and five. Very stunning.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: And wewe wagered, Texas with a dollar sign in front of it.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: I'm speechless.
French: No I did not get the answer from anyone else, it all came from Mr. Stewart's noggin.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: That's beautiful.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Mr. Selleck-
Tom: Yeah don't bother, I didn't write anything.
Alex: Good work.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: And finally, Sean the hedgehog. The category was numbers, and wewe wrote... A letter V.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Well I'll wewe what my friend..
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: V is a roman numeral, so despite your best efforts, wewe were able to answer correctly.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Let's see what wewe wagered. Suck it Trebek.
Audience: *Laughing*
Sean: *Laughing*
Alex: That's all the time we have. Thank wewe very much. I-
Tom: *Goes to Alex, and puts the oversized ten gallon hat on him*
Alex: would wewe GET THAT OFF ME?!!!?
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*

Coming up inayofuata is The Story Of Corporal Agarn

The Story of Corporal Agarn

Theme song

Though he goes on a rage from time to time
He is a very good friend of mine
And in Fort Courage he is well known as
Corporal Agarn

Starring Master Sword as Corporal Agarn
Tom Foolery as Captain Parmenter
Saten Twist as Sargent O' Rourke
Mortomis as Dobbs, the bugler
Snow Wonder as Wrangler Jane
Cosmic upinde wa mvua as Corporal Vanderbilt
Blaze as Corporal Duffy
Sean as Chief Wild Eagle
and Sonic as Crazy Cat

Captain Parmenter had all of his troops lined up for a meeting.

Captain Parmenter: Now, as all of wewe might know, there will be a colonel coming here to inspect the fort. We want everything to look nice.
Corporal Agarn: Should we salute the colonel with the cannon?
Captain Parmenter: Good question, I don't know. Why don't wewe two practice your salute, while I look at the calender to make sure I have the tarehe right for the colonel's arrival.
Corporal Agarn: Alright Dobbs, Duffy, wewe know what to do.
Corporal Duffy: *Puts cannonball into cannon*
Corporal Dobbs: *Lights fuse*

When the fuse got to the bottom, the kanuni, cannon didn't go off.

Corporal Agarn: *Gets angry, and kicks the cannon. The left wheel falls off, and then it shoots the cannonball at Vanderbilt's tower*
Corporal Vanderbilt: *Jumps out of tower*
Audience: *Laughing*
Corporal Agarn: This isn't good. We can't have that during the colonel's visit. Can we?!
Corporal Dobbs: uhh... I think so, and if he doesn't like it, I could play my bugle.
Corporal Agarn: OH NO wewe DON'T!!!!
Audience: *Laughing*
Corporal Agarn: If we don't give a good salute to the colonel, I'm going to go... *Getting angry* On!
Corporal Dobbs: Uh oh, this can't be good.
Corporal Agarn: *His face turns red, and smoke comes out of his ears* A!
Corporal Duffy: We never had this problem on the Alamo.
Audience: *Laughing*
Corporal Agarn: *Surrounded kwa flames because of his anger* RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGE!!!!!! *Turns back to normal* Okay, what were we doing?
Audience: *Laughing*

To be continued in another episode.

Ponies: *Singing* Though he goes on a rage from time to time, he is a very good friend of mine. And in Fort Courage he is well known as, Corporal Agarn.
Dobbs: *Playing the bugle, buruji poorly*
Corporal Agarn: I'm warning wewe Dobbs!
Audience: *Laughing*

Up next, Tom Foolery, and Marafiki continue with their race on Gran Turismo 6.

Nocturnal Mirage, Sean, Tom, Master Sword, Mortomis, Annie, and Heartsong were playing Gran Turismo 6. They were all at Sean's house.

The race was going good so far. Heartsong was in the lead with her BMW M4 safety car.

Sean: wewe know it's not really a safety car if wewe keep crashing into us.
Audience: *Laughing*
Heartsong: I have to win, that's the whole point of this game.
Mortomis: But wewe don't need to crash into us. wewe f**ked up my Cadillac for no reason.
Heartsong: *Looks at Mortomis' car which has a big dent at the back* What are wewe talking about? Your car is just fine.
Audience: *Laughing*
Mirage: I'm close to getting first place.
Sean: Stay out of this wewe Ford loving bastard!
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: How are wewe able to keep up with Heartsong? She has a juu speed that's much higher then the one on your car.
Sean: She keeps spinning out of control on the turns.
Annie: *Passes Sean*
Sean: Okay, I'm in third now. *Sees Mirage, and Mortomis pass him* Really wewe two? I swear if one zaidi person passes me-
Master Sword: *Passes Sean* Sorry.
Audience: *Laughing*
Sean: Now it's time to act like Heartsong.
Mirage: Shit, that can't be good!
Master Sword: Of course it can't be good. She's in first place!
Audience: *Laughing*
Sean: *Rams Master Sword's car*
Master Sword: Ah!! *Spins out, and hits Mortomis' car*
Mortomis: F**K! *Spins out, and hits Mirage's car*
Mirage: Ah! *Hits the wall*
Sean: *Passes Master Sword, Mortomis, and Mirage* Pleasure doing business with you.
Audience: *Laughing*
Annie: wewe can't catch up to me.
Sean: Maybe not, but I did get to 3rd place.
Heartsong: This is the final lap, right?
Sean: Yeah, that's why it says lap 2/2.
Audience: *Laughing*
Sean: We're on the 2nd, and final lap.
Annie: wewe have one zaidi turn to make before crossing that finish line.
Heartsong: That's what I was afraid of.
Audience: *Laughing*
Sean: If wewe hit the wall-
Heartsong: *Spins out* No, not again!
Audience: *Laughing*
Heartsong: *Hits the wall* Shit.
Annie: *Laughs* I knew that was gonna happen. First place is mine.
Sean: And thanks to wewe Heartsong, I am now in 2nd place.
Heartsong: *Backing her car up so she can continue racing*
Mirage: Look out!! *Crashes into Heartsong's car*

The others crashed into Heartsong's car, and they caused a pile up.

Annie: First place is mine.
Sean: *Gets second*
Tom: Well, this was almost enjoyable. It would have been better if Heartsong wasn't being retarded.
Audience: *Laughing*

Tom: What's up everypony? wewe know what time it is, right?
Audience: 4:35 PM.
Tom: Wrong. Well, actually, that's right, but-
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: What I meant was, it's time for bloopers we created during the filming of this episode. Enjoy.

Blooper song: link

Mirage: How many Playstations do wewe have?
Sean: Over 9,000!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Audience: *Laughing*
Director: Cut.
Sean: I have every single Playstation in the world!
Audience: *Laughing*

---

Sean: I think we'll race on Special Stage X.
Master Sword: Don't do that. The track is an oval, and it would be perfect for Mirage.
Mirage: Yes, I do have a Nascar after all.
Audience: *Laughing*
Sean: It wouldn't be perfect for Mirage, because instead of turning left, you'll have to turn right.
Audience: *Laughing*
Mirage: WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!!?
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Special guest stars are not allout, loosjgoijd!
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: I can't speak today. I don't know what's going on.

---

Alex: From 3rd Rock From The Sun, French Stewart, in sekunde place with negative $17,000.
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*
French: *Has his eyes closed. He does this everytime he talks* Alex, I wanna take wewe from behind.
Audience: *Laughing*
Sean: *Cringes* Maybe we oughta give him a better line.

---

French: Uh.... Who is John C- I forgot my line!

Take 2

French: Uh.... Who is John Cowswitch And The beaver, biva Brown Band? Thank wewe very much, I'll take animal sounds for 800.
Director: Cafferty!
French: Uh oh. *Opens his eyes*
Director: Keep them closed!!
Audience: *Laughing*

---

Corporal Agarn: Alright Dobbs, Duffy, wewe know what to do.
Corporal Duffy: *Puts cannonball into cannon*
Corporal Dobbs: *Lights fuse*

When the fuse got to the bottom, the kanuni, cannon didn't go off.

Corporal Agarn: *Gets angry, and kicks the cannon, but it hurts his hoof* OOWWWW!!!!
Audience: *Laughing*

---

Mirage: I'm close to getting first place.
Sean: Stay out of this wewe Ford loving bastard!
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: How are wewe able to keep up with Heartsong? She has a- wait a second. *Looks at his controller* My controller is dead.
Director: Plug it in.
Tom: *Plugs controller into playstation* Let's do this again from the top.

The End

STH/AM6663 Entertainment. Copyright, 2015