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posted by Ranty-cat
Chapter-1
mwaka 1920. Mir Jack. Mir is a detective. But, he doesn’t investigate cheating wives au crooked business partners. He investigates things that go bump in the night . When a beautiful blonde strolls into his office and says someone is trying to kill her, he smells danger. Too bad he needs the money.


How he got started with paranormal investigations is a long story. Something took his wife from him. Jane was his whole world. Now she's gone. He has been running down leads ever since.

It's an arduous task, prying into the dark and creeping things. Plenty of people won't even acknowledge the belief in ghosts and goblins, let alone consult a detective about it. And the cops? Solving the stranger side is not their interests. Mir knows it well because he used to be one of them. Now he works for himself, which implies most months the bills go unpaid. This mwezi is not exceptional either.


His office on the sekunde floor named with a title " Private dick inayofuata door" . It's exactly the sort of place wewe would not expect a private dick to hang his hat.

Packed with hidden trap doors and secret stash barrels, the Detective Office is just an inconvenient cog in a high-end Candy smuggling operation. As our private eye is puzzling over his clues, the pigeons are peeking in through his skylight to make sure he's occupied.

Despite being low on budget , sometimes Mir buys candies for the magnificent mischievous little Candy smugglers living in the neighbourhood. They are a bunch of restless agile kids who sell informations in exchange of candies.

There is a big long cloud, and it's stretched out, like a rope. At the end of it, the sun is
like a yellow hole .
The sunlit clouds drifted across the clear blue sky. Trees swayed gently in the breeze in the warm tropical sunshine.

He is at the office, feet up on the desk, a paperback in hand when a leggy blonde in a pinstripe mini-skirt and a black fedora with a lipstick the colour of temptation saunters in.

The sweet smell of aroma lingers in the air so that when Mir crosses the threshold it's like a shot of adrenaline right to his heart. Silence crashes down around him. She smiles. "I must be surrounded. She could have me killed right now but she won't. Where's the sport in that? So much zaidi fun to have me loose my mind. But I won't. I won't." Mir thinks to himself. She steps nearer, the aroma is now so heady it's almost poison. He wants to hold his breath but this is not going to be quick.

Mir settles deeper into his swivel chair, laces his fingers behind his head and says "Captivating dame like wewe walks into my office -- usually leads to trouble. "

She takes a kiti, kiti cha in one of the tatty office chairs across the dawati from Mir and crosses her legs.

"Sign on the door says wewe are a detective."

"So it does. What can I do for you? "

"Someone’s trying to kill me." she says.

"Why the hell anyone would one to kill such a gorgeous looking woman? "

"That's what I want wewe to find out."

Mir chuckles. "Fair enough. However, the introduction between us hasn’t been properly sketched yet. "

"Bubble tease. "

Mir coughs and clears his throat. It's suddenly hot in here. The urge to put a finger in his collar, alama and tug is being strongly resisted kwa him. "And why do wewe think there is an attempt to kill you? "

She doesn’t answer right away. She shudders almost imperceptibly, but Mir pretends not to notice. He waits her out. A silent pause for a right amount of time is being celebrated.
Finally, she says " I'm part of a performance crew at a club, Mr. Mir Jack. In fact, I am the singer of the team and have become the most maarufu member ."

He's curious as the way her face pinches as she admits this, but he merely says " Call me Mir. " and leans back in his chair knowing she is about to explain herself.

She nods and takes a breath.

" As I mentioned, Mir, I am the most maarufu crew member from the performance team. I am now the juu singer -- the reason they sell tickets. I think that's why someone is probably trying to kill me. Only, not in any normal sense. wewe see the other awali no. 1 spot holders all died. "

"How's that?"

Bubble shrugs. " Varieties of ways. Foxxy got run over kwa a bus and Rita fell out of a 7th floor window. "

" Sounds like a pair of unfortunate accidents ." Mir tells her.

"That's what the boys down at the station house concluded." She gets up and paces the floor. "But, wewe don't know all the facts. "

"Excuse my ignorance. Apparently, I happen to be not an omniscient deity" Mir majibu sarcastically.

Bubble laughs and says " I will spit the facts and clues, alright. Just hold your fire."

"I am listening. "

"Foxxy was paranoid of crossing traffic. It was practically a phobia with her. Her father got run over and killed when she was 11 years old, wewe see. It stuck with her. "

" That sort of things always does. "

" She was always cautious. There’s no way in hell Foxxy walked out into traffic without checking first. "

"Either of them take drugs? au any drinking issue?"

She gives him an exasperated look. "Just because we are dancers and singers doesn’t mean we're booze hounds as well, Mr. Jack."

"You didn’t answer my question."

"It's true that Foxxy likes to hit the bottle sometimes, but she wasn't drinking that night. I am certain of it because I was with her all siku till she left. And Rita... She was strait-laced. A good lad. She fell out of a hotel window that doesn’t open. Just fell right out. Even the police couldn’t explain it. "

Mir leans back and makes a steeple out of his fingers.
"That is suspicious indeed. The bobbies look into it?"

She snorts. "In a city like Deadslump? No one cares if a couple of singers and dancers turn up dead. The cops lists it as accidents. "

"Big blue meanies aren’t really open-minded about this sort of things." Mir agrees". "Howbeit, I don't entirely blame them because their ignorance stems from the lack of expertise on this subject. They cannot see beyond the realms of this realities logic. So, anyway, what do their deaths got to do with you? What entice the belief that wewe are next? "

Bubble inched over her own thoughts like a measuring worm. With a brooding look, she responded " Both were headliners. Both were maarufu and had my part. Someone au something killed them, Mir. I just know it! Won't wewe help me, Mir? "

Mir weighs his options. This is the first paying gig he has seen in a while and he could really use the money. Despite the urge for asking expensive payment, Mir felt sympathy for this girl.
At the moment, he felt like he would have aliyopewa anything for the power to soothe her frail soul, tormenting itself in its invincible ignorance like a small bird beating about the cruel wires of a cage. However, without money, it’s not possible for him to properly investigate since he has no money at all at the moment. So, he decided to ask for a mid-range payment that should be not zaidi than sufficient for the investigation.

"Of course I will help, but I don't work for free. "

"I understand. How much? "

"50 dollars a day, plus 80 upfront." He tells her.

Bubble gives another long look, like she could see right into his very soul... figuring out what type of man he is. Mir suppresses a smile as she renders her verdict kwa opening her fashionably small pocketbook with a deft click, rapidly counting out the money. After the clarification of the money part, he turns on to real business.

"So, did they have any enemies? Financial problems? Debt that she is not repaying? Any jealous ex-boyfriend? "

Bubble only shakes her head.

"So what about you, then? Any enemies? "

For a heartbeat au two

she breathed in, held the air, and let it out. With a quivering lip, blinking eyes, color rising in cheeks, she alisema " No..Not exactly enemy, but my ex-boyfriend do appears at the club regularly. But, he does nothing troubling. It's true that he is a creep and his presence discomforts me. He knows it very well and may be that's why is regular at the club. He comes in every Friday night. "

"Tell me more. " Mir inquires.

"He has a flushed rosy skin with dark coaled eyes. And a ring on his pinky."

"Can wewe give me his adress?" Mir asked.

"Absolutely." she replies. With vice-like grip, she grabbed the pen and started uandishi the adress in a paper like a thousand candles lighting the way.

"Here. " She says.

"Alright. These were essential clues. I will start my investigation grounded on these intels."

"Thanks for taking my case, Mir. I will see wewe on Friday night? Really hope wewe will be there to see my performance . "

"Count on it, doll."
LaurenZside
video
Elijah Jones, currently in speculation about a potential 2019 album confirms to have "let go" of the Kinlee And Elijah trend. For those of wewe who don't know. Kinlee And Elijah was a trend that started off in 2015 after Jones releasee his sophomore album "Utilize" The trend was based around characters in 2015. But upon suffering depression and promoting a Lindsey Stirling album in 2016, Elijah used Kinlee And Elijah as the final passing for Elijah's trilogical album "Forgive To Forget" 2017. Based after the Brave Enough album he promoted in August 2016.

Currently, after relleasing the kewyord in 2018. Followers have been in swali on whether au not Jones will be releasing his 4th studio album rumoured to release in 2019. With little hype and little posting, we can only hope that Jones will have something releasing this year. Currently after releasing the keyword
Jones is expected to start something new, and different for his inayofuata "supposedly" 2019 album.
Repost with my new inayopendelewa characters because for some reason this one got removed??? Like I searched for it because I was planning on making another makala like this but I couldn't find this one.

I had good fun making my silly ‘how my inayopendelewa characters would hold out in a zombie apocalypse’ article, so I decided to make another about how each would do in a horror movie. It is kind of vague as there‘s a vast many types of horror movies. So the characters won’t be as closely connected to one another as in the last one—characters A and B will interact with character C zaidi than characters...
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posted by SilentForce
Number 15: Burger king foot lettuce. The last thing you'd want in your Burger King burger is someone's foot fungus. But as it turns out, that might be what wewe get. A 4channer uploaded a picha anonymously to the site showcasing his feet in a plastic bin of lettuce. With the statement: "This is the lettuce wewe eat at Burger King." Admittedly, he had shoes on.

But that's even worse.

The post went live at 11:38 PM on July 16, and a mere 20 dakika later, the Burger King in swali was alerted to the rogue employee. At least, I hope he's rogue. How did it happen? Well, the BK employee hadn't removed...
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 Suppose letters looked backwards, sideways, completely out of place, au reflected, moving au different colors for you.
Suppose letters looked backwards, sideways, completely out of place, or reflected, moving or different colors for you.
Dyslexia is a brain-based condition. It causes difficulty with reading, spelling, uandishi and sometimes speaking. In people with dyslexia, the brain has trouble recognizing au processing certain types of information. ... Like other types of learning and attention issues, dyslexia is a lifelong condition.

See captions of pictures^
because it makes u feel intellectually superior? because wewe associate it with education and think that the zaidi educated wewe are the better wewe are? because being educated automatically makes wewe an athority on whatever wewe wanna say? because when u don’t have a real argument it’s an easy way to get points?

here’s the thing

last time I had an account on this hellscape (before I was rly active on Twitter and stuff) I cared a looooooot about grammar like y’all do. I was totally a dick about it. but then I realized! It doesn’t fucking matter! someone can make a great point and not have...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Theme Song

Kevin: *Plays piano*
David: *Playing bass*
Liam: *Playing drums*
Liz: *Plays guitar*
Mr. Nut: *Sings* Welcome everybody to The Nut House. Thankfully this is not in Laos. Come on everybody into The Nut House. wewe can wear anything except for a blouse. Come on everybody, step into The Nut House.
Everyone: The Nut House!

Episode 6: Cards

Kevin: *Walking through the park*
Liam: hujambo Kevin. *Runs over to him*
Kevin: Liam. *High fives Liam as he arrives* What brings wewe here?
Liam: An interest for walking. You?
Kevin: The same. Plus, I wanted to relive some nostalgia of the playground....
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posted by Canada24
FUNNY SOUTH PARK MOMENTS:

#1: (I FORGET THE TITLE):
Stan: Shut up Cartman, wewe silly goose!
Randy: (stops car) WHAT DID wewe SAY!?
Stan: I just me-
Randy: wewe call him an a*** like normal people!
Stan: But dad I-
Randy: STANLEY CALL YOURR FRIEND AN A*** RIGHT NOW!!
Stan: ... Cartman your an a***.
Randy: Thank you!

#2: CHRISTIAN ROCK BAND:
Cartman (forms a band with Butters and Token): I resent that, sir! I have never in my life done anything just for the money! If I'm lying may the Lord strike me down right now.
*Cue Butters and Token looking up at the sky in fear and Butters backing away.*

#3: RAISINS:...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Dunedin, New Zealand.

Lewis: This assignment is tougher than any of us expected.
Derek: Yes, I agree. Thankfully, we still have enough ammunition to last us a couple of days.
Lewis: But what if her men attack us again? First they kill a dozen of American tourists, then two men from ASIS. How much longer is this going to happen?
Derek: I don't know. One thing's for sure, we're going to need help.
Lewis: Okay. Look outside, and keep guard while I call our superiors.

London, MI6 Headquarters.

MI6 Operative: *Walks to a man sitting behind a desk* Sir, Agent's King, and O'Rourke on the white scrambler....
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posted by Seanthehedgehog

 Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see!
Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see!


Car Stereotypes

There are many different types of cars for many different types of people. Observe.

Audi

Man: *Driving a black A6 at 80 miles an saa down the highway* Get out of the fucking way!!! *Pushes a Cadillac off the road*
Woman: *Crashes into a tree* Maniac!
Man: *Tailgating a Jaguar that is actually going the speed of 55* Come on, don't wewe know what the speed is?! *Honks the horn* Let's go!! *Honks again* I don't have time for this!! *Bumps into the Jaguar, and makes it crash...
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About a mwezi ago, I wrote an makala where I wrote down pretty much my entire history with Frozen and how it changed my life. I wrote that as an anniversary article, because it had been three years since I became a shabiki of Frozen. However, uandishi all of that down, made me feel not only very nostalgic...but old. I know it's a presumptous thing to say, since it's only been 3 years and not 10 au 15. But the reason I alisema I am feeling old is because I experienced all of those things in a certain period, and the idea that time passes and things change fascinated me so much that I decided to write...
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i just copied and pasted it! :P
more than useful i found it amusing! :P

1. THINGS wewe CAN DO WITH ABSOLUTELY NOTHING

Blink wildly and then close your eyes really tight for an interesting light show
(Amusement Potential: 1-5 minutes)
See a variety of blobs, stars and flashes. Try to make out shapes and see if your subconscious is trying to send wewe a message (perhaps that funny shape is saying, 'send all your money to urban75.com'?)

See how long wewe can hold a note
(Amusement Potential: 4-20 minutes)
Not that much fun, but it sure passes the time. Play with a friend, au try to beat your own personal...
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added by Mauserfan1910
Source: the internet???
After Gwen won Total Drama Island, the girls managed to celebrate their last night at Camp Wawanakwa. Most of the girls get back at Don for his mistreatment of the contestants, even Courtney, whose elimination in "Basic Straining" was unjust and that Don refused to believe that someone (Harold) tampered with the votes.

It all starts on the cliff of Camp Wawanakwa, which was where the first challenge of the season, where Gwen, Bridgette, Leshawna, Lindsay, Izzy, and Heather jump into the lake. At the juu of the cliff is Don, the host of "Total Drama Island".

Don: Oh my god. I am too scared to...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Theme Song

Kevin: *Plays piano*
David: *Playing bass*
Liam: *Playing drums*
Liz: *Plays guitar*
Mr. Nut: *Sings* Welcome everybody to The Nut House. Thankfully this is not in Laos. Come on everybody into The Nut House. wewe can wear anything except for a blouse. Come on everybody, step into The Nut House.
Everyone: The Nut House!

Episode 3: wewe Have Received A Message

Miss. Heart: *Reading a book in bed*
Wayne: *Walks into the room, and takes off his shoes*
Miss. Heart: wewe seem unhappy. Is something wrong?
Wayne: I cannot go back to work!
Miss. Heart: What's the matter?
Wayne: I'm under payed...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Theme Song

Kevin: *Plays piano*
David: *Playing bass*
Liam: *Playing drums*
Liz: *Plays guitar*
Mr. Nut: *Sings* Welcome everybody to The Nut House. Thankfully this is not in Laos. Come on everybody into The Nut House. wewe can wear anything except for a blouse. Come on everybody, step into The Nut House.
Everyone: The Nut House!

Episode 2: The Book

Parker: *Reading a book*
Liam: *Walks in with David*
David: Is that Parker kusoma a book?
Liam: This is interesting. *Walks with David over to Parker* Well, I didn't know wewe liked to read.
David: Neither did I.
Parker: You're not going to make...
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Original Video: link

Transcript:
Stan Smith: Okay, class, It is time to hand back your ripoti cards. I will pass them out now.
Sugar: Oh, lord, please let me have a good ripoti card. (Sugar sees her ripoti card and notices the bad grades and remarks, especially with Sugar being sent to a Mental People's School.) No! (x7) Waaaaaaaaaaaa!
Ella: Yay! I got a 4.0 GPA and Straight A's! (Ella leaves her desk) Mr. Smith, may I use the bathroom?
Stan: Sure. Also, we are looking for a time and tarehe for your Student of the mwaka award ceremony.
Ella: Okay, thank you!
Sugar: I can't believe I got a 0.0 on my report...
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posted by BJsRealm
This world definitely need a single global currency.I hope BTC would become a global currency in the near future.So far,BTC is just a cryptocurrency used only on .onion sites yet someday it just might become the new official global/UN electronic currency.
posted by Seanthehedgehog

An Imperial landing craft was leaving Coruscant. However, no Imperials were inside. It was only two men from the Republic.

Republic Pilot: *Looking at the clear sky. No other ships are seen as they are out of Coruscant*
Colonel Turner: *Walks up, and sits inayofuata to the pilot* Thirty five minutes. Can we make it?
Republic Pilot: We can make it. Will your Marafiki make it?
Colonel Turner: Let's hope so.

Song: link

John made it back to the shed with Morris, Mary, and Cartwright where Heidi was waiting in the speeder bus.

Heidi: *Puts up a jammer, and turns it on*
John: *Starts the speeder bus,...
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posted by TheLefteris24
 Praise Kek!
Praise Kek!
Heed those words Mortals and set yourselves free!

There is no peace, there is PEPE
There is no fear, there is Shadilay(Peace be upon him).
There is no death, there is God Emperor.
There is no weakness, there is the MEMES.

I am the moyo of darkness.
I know no fear.
But rather I instil it in my enemies.
I am the destroyer of worlds.
I know the power of the MEMES.
I am the moto of hate.

All the universe bows before kek.
I pledge myself to kek.
For I have found true life In the death of SocJus.

Peace is a lie, there is only Kek.
Through passion, I gain salt.
Through Shadilay(Peace be upon him), I gain power.
Through power, I gain Lulz.
Through victory, my chains are broken.
The MEMES shall set me free.

Preached kwa the Enlightened Prophet known as ''The Turbo Syncretist''. The truth has been spoken! Know
T
h
e

C
o
d
e

o
f

K
e
K

Praise Kek !!!!
 KEK WILLS IT!
KEK WILLS IT!